Mitch Martin Quotes in Old School (2003)

Mitch Martin: True love is hard to find, sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend...

Beanie: [after finding out that it's in the bylaw that the only way to keep the fraternity is take a course of tests but Beanie does not want to do it] Who'se lives are ruined?

Mitch Martin: Well, see. Blue's dead. Frank's divorced. I lost my house. Nicole thinks I'm a total jackass. And now we got nine kids who are gonna get expelled from school, and you're not even gonna help them.

Mitch Martin: At this point, you may be asking yourself, why am I holding this 30 pound cinderblock in my hands? You might also ask yourself, why does this cinderblock have a long piece of string tied to it? And finally, why is the other end of this string tied securely to your penis?

Beanie: And the answer, ladies... is trust.

Frank: Hey, I just want to thank you one last time for being here. It's the best day ever.

Beanie: Don't even start with me, Franklin, okay? You need to walk away from this ASAP.

Frank: What?

Beanie: You need to get out, Frankie. This is it. It's now or never. You need to get out of here while you're still single.

Frank: I'm not single.

Beanie: She's 30 yards away, you're single now.

Frank: Come on, Marissa's the best thing that's ever happened to me.

Beanie: Why don't you give that six months. You don't think that'll change? I got a wife, kids. Do I seem like a happy guy to you, Frankie?

Beanie: There's my wife. See that? Always smiling? Hi, honey. Judging, watching, "Look at the baby."

Mitch Martin: She's coming down the aisle, Beanie. Let it go.

Jerry: What sort of actual association will you have with the university?

Mitch Martin: Who are these people?

Frank: I don't know.

Beanie: Well, legally speaking, there will be a loose affiliation. But, we will give nothing back to the academic community. As well as provide no public service of any kind. This much I promise you.

Mitch Martin: Denver? The sunshine state? Gorgeous!