Mississippi Quotes in Happythankyoumoreplease (2010)

Mississippi: I realized the problem. You write short stories... and I think you like living short stories, but I'm kinda ready for the novel.

Sam Wexler: I totally agree. One night stands are the worst.

Mississippi: So you want to have a three night stand?

Sam Wexler: Yes.

Mississippi: What is this, like your line or something?

Mississippi: [examining J.P.'s leg after he's been shot] I gotta cut this pant leg.

Sheriff J. P. Harrah: Well, go ahead and cut it! Have you got a kni...

[Mississippi pulls out his knife from its hiding place on his back]

Sheriff J. P. Harrah: A knife? Uh, I suppose I've asked this before, but just who?

[looks at Cole instead]

Sheriff J. P. Harrah: Who is he?

Cole: Tell him your name, Mississippi.

Mississippi: [sighs and looks up] Alan Bourdillion Trehearne.

Sheriff J. P. Harrah: Well, no wonder he carries a knife.

Mississippi: [while mixing some hangover cure] Let's see. We got ipecac and mustard and cayenne. That leaves us asafetida.

Cole: Are you sure that Johnny Diamond wasn't an embalmer?

Cole: Now just a minute, son.

Mississippi: I... AM NOT... YOUR SON. My name is Alan Bourdillion Traherne.

Cole: ...Lord Almighty...

Mississippi: Yeah.

Bull Harris: [about Cole and Mississippi going on patrol] If you're gonna do that, here's a couple of badges.

[gives them to Cole and Mississippi]

Bull Harris: Now, raise your right hand.

[they do as told]

Bull Harris: I forgot the words, but you better say 'I do'!

Cole, Mississippi: I do!

Bull Harris: Now you're deputies!

Mississippi: You suppose these will do any good if somebody takes a shot at us?

Bull Harris: Give them a good mark to shoot at.

Cole: Did you get him?

Mississippi: Who?

Cole: The fella that ran outta the church!

Mississippi: Well, yes and no.

Cole: Yes and no? Did you or didn't you?

Mississippi: I hit the sign, and the sign hit him.

Cole: Well, that's great.

Mississippi: He was limping when he left!

Cole: He was limping when he got here!

Bull Harris: [while mixing the hangover cure] Here's your gunpowder.

Cole: *Gunpowder?*

Bull Harris: Yup. Mississippi remembered it on the way to the store.

Mississippi: Put it in, Bull.

Bull Harris: All of it?

Mississippi: Uh-huh, all of it.

Cole: I hope you don't... blow him up!

Cole: What was the idea of diving under those horses?

Sheriff J. P. Harrah: Diving under those horses?

Mississippi: Yeah. A man can't shoot good when his horse is jumping, and a horse will not step on a man.

Sheriff J. P. Harrah: He won't?

Mississippi: He will?

Sheriff J. P. Harrah: Alan Bourdillion Ter-who?

Cole: Terhane.

Mississippi: Trahearne!

Cole: [with Hara] Trahearne.

Mississippi: Yeah.

Cole: Step down off that horse.

Mississippi: You always giving people orders?

Mississippi: [Joey slaps Mississippi and he slaps her] Now don't do that again 'cos I can hit a little harder than you.

Cole: What kept you?

Mississippi: I was talking to a girl. She said she saw...

Cole: A girl?

Mississippi: Don't you think I can know a girl?

Mississippi: Always liked that poem too. Makes me wanna...

Cole: Ride, boldly ride? Well it don't work out that way.

Mississippi: I'm learnin' that.

Mississippi: Well, we are we headed?

Cole: To see a girl.

Mississippi: To see a *girl*?

Cole: Yes, a girl! Don't you think I could know a girl?

Bull Harris: ...might have anyhow if I wasn't tryin' to figure out what that fella's got on his head.

Mississippi: It called a hat.

Bull Harris: Well, I'll have to take your word for it.

Sheriff J. P. Harrah: Who are you?

Mississippi: We met last night.

Sheriff J. P. Harrah: Last night? When was that?

Doctor Donovan: You know these wounds were made by buckshot don't you?

Cole: I thought they were.

Doctor Donovan: Who was using a shotgun?

Cole: A certain young man...

Mississippi: I was using a shotgun, Doc.

Doctor Donovan: You. I thought you was on there side.

Sheriff J. P. Harrah: He was.

Mississippi: I told you I was no good with a gun.

Bull Harris: Trouble is, Doc, Cole was in front of the gun. The safe place is behind Mississippi when he shoots that thing.

Mississippi: Want me to go with you?

Bull Harris: Yeah, if I get shot you can bring back the food.

Nelse McLeod: Can you use a gun?

Mississippi: Well, if I could I'd be using one. Good evening.

Cole: Just minute, Mississippi.

Mississippi: Would you mind telling me why you have such a great passion for my company?

Mississippi: Are you bein' fair?

Cole: How?

Mississippi: Lettin' him go in there?

Cole: Well I'd hate to be the one to try and stop him. They laughed at him, Mississippi. That'll make the difference.

Mississippi: Always make you mad, don't I?

Cole: Mostly.

Cole: Don't you know better than to follow a man that way?

Mississippi: Sorry... I didn't know there was another way.

Mississippi: Well, I found out one thing.

Cole: What's that?

Mississippi: You know a girl.

Mississippi: [about Joey] She was really gonna shoot that fella.

Cole: She shot me.

Mississippi: She shot... uh... 'n that somethin'...

Mississippi: I'm tryin' to thank you.

Cole: I'm hungry!