Miramax Studios Security Guard Gordon Quotes in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001)

[several security guards, led by Gordon, have suddenly rushed onto the set of Good Will Hunting 2: Hunting Season]

Miramax Studios Security Guard Gordon: Sorry to interrupt sirs, but we've got a 10-07 on our hands.

Matt Damon: [exasperated] Oh Jesus, again Ben?

Ben Affleck: [cocky] No, bullshit, because I wasn't WITH a hooker today, ha-HA!

Miramax Studios Security Guard Gordon: There they are!

Jay: Affleck, you the bomb in "Phantoms", yo!

[James Van Der Beek and Jason Biggs are being arrested by mistake]

James Van Der Beek: You've got the wrong guys! Doesn't anyone watch the WB?

Jason Biggs: I'm a teen idol, dammit! Don't you recognize me? Look at me. I'm the pie fucker.

Miramax Studios Security Guard Gordon: [to his buddies] Yeah, well. In prison, he'll be the pie.

Jay: Hey, I'll make you a deal - this guy

[points to Silent Bob]

Jay: will suck your dick off if you let us go.

Miramax Studios Security Guard Gordon: Contrary to what you believe, not everyone in Hollywood is a homosexual.

Jay: How about this deal- he'll suck my dick while you watch and jerk off.

Miramax Studios Security Guard Gordon: Alright.

[takes Jay and Silent Bob behind a wall, out of sight]

Miramax Studios Security Guard Gordon: Make it fast and sexy.

Jay: [to Silent Bob] It's either this or jail. And you know what they do to you in jail.

Miramax Studios Security Guard Gordon: I was a guard. Alright, and after it's all over, you say "Ooh, what a lovely tea party".

Miramax Studios Security Guard Gordon: Brenda?

Shannen Doherty: Dick!