Midge Quotes in I'm Not Rappaport (1996)

Midge: Lord, I asked for help, and you send me a weird Commie blind man.

Midge: You made it up. You made it all up.

Nat Moyer: Of course.

Midge: Conned your own kid.

Nat Moyer: Go back to sleep.

Midge: That's a sin!

Nat Moyer: I did it to save a life: mine.

Midge: You're not a nice guy. I'm ashamed I even sung a song with you.

Nat Moyer: You don't understand. Nursing homes were dancing in her head. Desperate measures were required.

Nat: Hey, Rappaport! I haven't seen you in ages. How have you been?

Midge: I'm not Rappaport.

Nat: Rappaport, what happened to you? You used to be a short fat guy, and now you're a tall skinny guy.

Midge: I'm not Rappaport.

Nat: Rappaport, you used to be a young guy with a beard, and now you're an old guy with a mustache.

Midge: I'm not Rappaport.

Nat: Rappaport, how has this happened? You used to be a cowardly little white guy, and now you're a big imposing black guy.

Midge: I'm not Rappaport.

Nat: And you changed your name, too!

Kenneth: Bitch, what do you want to listen to?

Midge: I like Schubert.

Kenneth: Schubert? Well, I don't!

Midge: For the first time in my life, people cheering for me. Were you deaf? Didn't you hear 'em? We're not hitchhiking any more. We're riding!

Connie: Oh, this rotten business!

Midge: Aw, lay off the business. It's like any other business, only here the blood shows.

Midge: Connie, you think the world is full of angels? Listen, it's time for you to grow up.

Connie: And I know you, but I didn't know you up in that ring. You looked as if you wanted to kill that guy. As if you would've killed him if they hadn't stopped you.

Midge: Is that bad?

Connie: I don't know. I really don't know. But I kept thinking you weren't just hitting that guy in the ring. I kept thinking you were hitting a lot of guys. Different guys. All the guys that ever hurt you. I can't put my finger on it but there's... there's something wrong about that.

Midge: [to Grace] You dumped me once. Now I'm dumping you. For good. You better promote yourself another meal ticket.

Midge: Look, you and me and the old lady. That's what's important. Nobody else.

Connie: What's happened to you? Nothing stands in your way anymore, does it? First, Emma, then Johnny Dunne, now Haley. You've got your own way of destroying people and I don't want any part of it.

Midge: Well, who's twisting your arm?

Connie: Thanks, Midge. You've made it easy for me.

[starts to leave]

Midge: OK, go on. Feed yourself for a change. Find yourself a job. Go with Haley. Ah, take your bleeding heart out of here.

Connie: It's not that, Midge. It's just that I wouldn't get much sleep at nights wondering when it was going to be my turn.

[he exits]

Grace: Where are you going?

Midge: Out. I got a date with a lady. You know what a lady is? Nah, how could you?

Connie: Hey, you're crazy. You don't know anything about boxing. You'll get your ears knocked off.

Midge: Listen, for 35 bucks, I'd get my head knocked off.

Emma: It's funny.

Midge: What?

Emma: You know, I didn't like you at first. Well, you know, you never smile. I mean really smile. Not just on the outside.

Midge: Got to be happy to smile that way.

Emma: Aren't you happy?

Midge: Well, right now I am.

Emma: Then why don't you smile?

Emma: [he laughs] Midge, why aren't you happy?

Midge: Happy? It's hard to be happy when you're poor. I've been poor all my life. Real poor. You know what it is to be real poor? Cold poor? Hungry poor?

Midge: But you told me to look you up. You said you wanted to manage me.

Haley: Aw, that was then. This is now. Everything changes. I'm out of the fight business. It stinks. No kidding.

[inhales through his nose]

Haley: Take a deep breath. Stinks in here, doesn't it? And it's not sweat. It's no good.

Midge: [to Emma at the beach] Well, shall we get wet?

Joan: What size panties do you think Lois wears?

Midge: Well if she ever wore panties, probably about a medium.

Midge: So are you looking forward to playing basketball in your birthday suits, girls?

Fern Hymenstein: What?

Gina: That's the name of the game, baby: Strip-Basketball. It's very simple. You make a basket, we take something off. We make a basket, you take something off.

Fern Hymenstein: So come on, where are all your players? We can't play with ourselves.

Midge: Want me to show you how?

Midge: You want to know something? I don't think Mozart's going to help at all.

Scottie: Midge, who do you know that's an authority on San Francisco history?

Midge: That's the kind of greeting a girl likes! Not this "Hello-you-look-wonderful" stuff, just a good straight "Who do you know that's an authority on San Francisco his - -"

[interrupted]

Scottie: What's this doohickey?

Midge: It's a brassiere! You know about those things, you're a big boy now.

Scottie: I've never run across one like that.

Midge: It's brand new. Revolutionary up-lift: No shoulder straps, no back straps, but it does everything a brassiere should do. Works on the principle of the cantilevered bridge.

Scottie: It does?

Midge: An aircraft engineer down the peninsula designed it; he worked it out in his spare time.

Scottie: Kind of a hobby, a do-it-yourself kind of thing!

Midge: I talked to the woman in musical therapy, and she said that Mozart's the boy for you.