Mick Quotes in Crocodile Dundee II (1988)


Mick Quotes:

  • Punk: [about Mick breaking into Rico's mansion/fortress] What are ya chances?

    Mick: Fair.

    Punk: What are your chances of getting out of here with that jacket on?

    Mick: [throws his knife across the room into the punk's mohawk] Better than average.

  • Mick: G'day, amigo.

  • Rico: Get some sleep. Gonna be a long day tomorrow.

    Mick: [hiding and watching their campsite, he whispers] Yeah. And it' ll be a long night, too.

  • Ledge Suicider: I'm about to throw myself off this building.

    Mick: You could kill yourself.

    Ledge Suicider: That's the whole idea.

    Mick: Oh, ah, right. I'll just wait till you're finished.

    [after several moments when the Ledge Suicider does not jump]

    Mick: Would you mind getting a move on? I'm on me lunch break.

  • Sue: You shot Walter.

    Mick: Yeah. It was the only thing I could think of to save his life.

  • Mick: [to suicidal ledge-walker] Just out of curiosity, why would you want to - - pssshhheeewwwww?

    [makes whistling sound and gestures with his arm in a diving motion]

  • Mick: What did you do last night?

    Punk: We didn't do nothing. We was here all night.

    Mick: That's what you call cool, is it? Well, tomorrow, if someone asks you the same question, you can say: "We didn't do nothing." Or you can say: "We went out to Long Island to help this lunatic storm a fortress!" At the very least you can come watch me get my head blown off.

  • Sue Charlton: Mick - be careful. This isn't a game.

    Mick: It is to me.

  • Mick: You ready to go home now?

    Sue Charlton: I am home.

  • Mick: Wanna give me some help?

    Sue: Would Bonnie say no to Clyde?

    Mick: Who?

  • Mick: Now we're all on foot. That makes us even.

    Sue: Seven to two is "even"?

  • Sue: Do you know where they are?

    Mick: Yeah. About 500 yards that way, over that ridge.

    Sue: How do you know that?

    Mick: Can't you smell it?

    Sue: Their sweat?

    Mick: Wally's aftershave.

  • Chief Lester Jannings: He couldn't live with it. The other vermin didn't care. But him, the guilt ate at his gut like an acid. He wanted you to come back. He would pray every night that you'd come back. Until one night he couldn't wait any longer. Took his car out and smashed it and his brains into a retaining wall. Now you're here, and he doesn't even know it. My fault. I should have let him be punished then, along with the other filth. But he was my only son. his mother died giving birth to him. He and I are all each other have. I was afraid for him. Afraid for me. See, I was a public figure. So I did things. I fixed it. And now I just want you to go. Let it end.

    Jennifer Spencer: There's one left.

    Chief Lester Jannings: Yes. And I've got him, in my jail. He preyed on Alby and preyed on me ever since. And that too is going to end.

    Mick: [surprising them] Oh is that so, Lester boy?

  • Mick: I don't give a fuck about Tyrone. And Alby, he's covered.

    Ray Parkins: Alby? How? The guy's a vegetable, he doesn't even know if he's pissing himself!

    Mick: He's *covered*.

    Ray Parkins: [teasingly] Ok.

  • Mick: [screaming] Get her! Get the BITCH!

  • Mick: [while beating up Callahan with his men] Hot shot cop! Your ass is *mine*!

  • Mick: [holding Jennifer's handgun] Oh, is this what you had in mind for me?

    [cackles evilly]

  • Mick: [pressuring Alby to rape Jennifer] Stick it Alby! Are you queer?

  • [upon seeing that his challenger in a duel is a woman]

    Lee: This ain't fair.

    Mick: You're right. It ain't.

  • Mick: You got ideas, Lee?

    Lee: Sure. I got lots of ideas.

    Mick: Good. Cause I'm all out.

  • Mick: I feel bigger with a trigger.

  • [Prince joins Haven and Charlie at the table]

    John Haven: So Charlie probably runs the town, huh?

    Prince: Why do you care?

    John Haven: I've gotta spend some time here, I'd just like to know who winds the clock.

    [Haven throws his chips onto the table in front of Prince. Mick notices this, and walks over]

    Charlene - aka 'Charlie': [sarcastically] It's been a nice conversation. I'd hate to have it end.

    Mick: Who's this?

    Charlene - aka 'Charlie': Mick, this is cousin John.

    John Haven: From Waxahachie.

    Charlene - aka 'Charlie': Cousin John's a missionary on his way to China.

    Mick: What's keeping him?

    Prince: Think he's wondering if he couldn't do more good here.

    [Mick tries to remove the bottle of win, but Haven stops him]

    Mick: You ain't too friendly, are ya?

    John Haven: I like to pick my friends.

    Prince: You oughtta learn not to pick 'em so easy, like you do your cousins.

    John Haven: [gesturing at Charlie] Ask her.

    Charlene - aka 'Charlie': I never saw him before in my life.

    [Haven and Mick are still wrestling over the bottle. Haven suddenly throws a glass of wine in Mick's face, and punches him. Haven is then held by various bystanders. Mick wipes his face and squares up to Haven]

    Mick: You're too little to make that big a mistake.

    John Haven: You gonna correct me, or just bleed at the mouth?

    Mick: [to the men holding Haven] Bring him outside.

  • Mick: Looks like the Chinese ran out of lead!

  • Mick: [talking about Greece] Les, you do know how they separate the men from the boys here, don't you?

    Lee: How?

    Mick: With a crowbar.

  • Mick: You don't scare me, freak. Underneath all that hair, you're still a dork, Scott. I've handled your kind before. Your mama used to steal chickens out of the backyard until I blew her head off with a shotgun. Right, Scott?

  • Mick: Shoot it, Fatboy.

  • Mick: Tess, will you marry me?

    Tess McGill: Maybe.

    Mick: Ya call that an answer?

    Tess McGill: You want another answer, ask another girl.

  • Anton: Hey, I didn't kill anyone on purpose, okay?

    Mick: Yeah, well, we weren't in hell! I mean, there was this bright white light at the end of a long tunnel, right, and there was these chicks' voices, and that music...

    Anton: Music?

    Pnub: Yeah, kinda uncool music, like, Enya. And these chicks' voices, they were saying, "come to us, come towards the light".

    Anton: So what happened?

    Mick: We figured, fuck it, I mean, it was really far!

  • Mick: [holding an electric carving knife] Look at me! Look at me! I'm Leatherface!

  • [last lines]

    Mick: Hey, you were right. Anton does scream like a girl!

    Pnub: You think we should tell him that we put that writing on the ceiling?

    Mick: Fuck it!

    Pnub: Hey, let's go walk through a nurse!

    Mick: Okay, but be careful. Some of them are guys.

  • Pnub: Maybe we should clean that up.

    Mick: Yeah, and while we're at it, let's just clean the whole fuckin' house.

  • Mick: SWEET JESUS!

    Pnub: Ok, that wasn't my fault, that thing should've come down a LOT slower!

  • Anton: [Hears moaning coming from Mick's grave] Mick?

    Mick: Over here. Anton, help me. Come on, man, I can't breathe down here. Anton? Anton, can you hear me?

    Anton: [Kneels and leans over Mick's grave] Mick?

    Mick: Yeah man, it's Mick.

    Anton: You're dead!

    Mick: No I'm not! You conked me on the head pretty good. I must've been unconcious.

    Anton: You think?

    Mick: I know fucker, now dig me up!

  • Pnub: [after finding Curtis and his date dead in his car] What a waste.

    Mick: I thought you didn't like Curtis.

    Pnub: I'm talkin' about that ass!

    Mick: Well, at least he died happy.

  • Anton: You lied to me!

    Mick: You killed me, let's try to keep this thing in perspective here!

  • Mick: Let's go walk through a nurse.

  • [after the anticlimactic destruction of the hand]

    Mick: That's it? That's it? No explosions, no hellfire, no -

    [screeches demonically]

    Mick: I mean, no, I'm glad everybody's all right, but... that was weak.

  • Pnub: Hey, don't forget my bong.

    Mick: You did not make that bong.

    Pnub: Yeah, I arc-welded it and shit.

    Mick: You don't even take auto shop.

    Pnub: Fuck you!

  • Mick: That is some one-hit shit.

  • Mick: I'm gonna go call 911. What's the number?

  • Pnub: [Anton, Mick and Pnub, find that the 'killer' has written the word 'ANT' on the floor in blood after finding the corpses of Anton's parents] "Ant?" They-they were killed by ants?

    Mick: [annoyed] Please don't be stupid.

    [to Anton]

    Mick: Do you have, like, an evil aunt?

  • Mick: [to 911 operator] There is something wrong with my friend, I think he smoked some nutmeg or something.

  • [Anton is about to chop off his 'evil' right hand]

    Mick: Wait a minute. If you chop off your right hand, how are you going to chop the other one off?

    Anton: Oh no, man, the lefty's a keeper. I mean, I guess it wasn't idle enough.

    Mick: Really?

    Anton: Oh yeah, I mean, I hit the remote with it, light up with it, relieve a little tension. No, this is the answer.

  • Mick: Yeah, I was a little bitter about the getting killed by my best friend thing, but I've had time to get over it.

  • Anton: All I do is sit around all day, smoke pot, watch TV...

    Mick: No, no! No Kevin Costner speech, let's just go!

  • Mick: Anton it's killing me to see me to see you this stressed out man. You cut off your hand in the interest of who knows how many others. So, what I want you to do is take a little Anton time. Okay just relax, kick back my man.

    Anton: No, no, no, you know what? Not this time. Okay I'm through with that, I mean all I do is I sit around all day I veg out, I watch TV, I smoke pot...

    Mick: No, no, no, no Kevin Costner speeches okay? Let's just go.

  • Mick: It's Mighty Joe bong!

  • Mick: Hey, you're right, Anton screams like a girl.

  • Mick: OK,I'm not going through all this Tanya.

  • Sally: Have I got a ronnie?

    Mick: A what?

    Sally: A ronnie, moustache, like?

    Mick: Show.


    Mick: Well you're no Tom Selleck, but...

    Sally: Ah, go fuck yourself.

  • Mick: I've got a poem for ya. "You are an idiot, You are a bitch, You shit me to tears, ...I'm goin' down the pub."

  • Mick: I didn't call you an idiot, I asked if you were an idiot, ya fuckin' idiot!

  • Mick: Please! Stop!

    Pierre: Faggot!

  • [Mick talks to a reporter about Tom saving all of their lives]

    Mick: I'm telling you, those men they were - They were going to kill us. They were going to kill us, and if it weren't for Tom... He's a hero.

  • [Mick the diner chef tells Tom and Pat about the craziest girl he ever slept with]

    Mick: Yeah. She used to have these crazy goddamn dreams where instead of her boyfriend, I was some kind of demented killer. I woke up one night, she stuck a goddamn fork in my shoulder.

    Tom Stall: You're kidding me.

    Mick: Nope. I'm spurting blood. She's sitting there crying, going, 'Baby, I love you, I love you.'

    Tom Stall: [Pat laughs] So, what happened? You broke up with her, right?

    Mick: No, I married her.

    Mick: [Pat continues to laugh] Hey, it lasted 6 years. Nobody's perfect, Tom.

    Tom Stall: I guess not.

  • Mick: [At the gravesite] Why did he do it? I keep asking myself that over and over.

    Doctor Copeland: Oh, I don't suppose any of us will ever know that. None of us ever knew him... not really. We all brought our troubles to him, never stopping to think he may have troubles of his own.

  • Mrs. Kelly: [Watching Mick's party guests leave] Well, there they go. Can't say as I blame them either.

    [She shakes her head]

    Mrs. Kelly: After all, you did throw them out.

    Mick: Well, I don't care. I don't care one little bit! Here I thought they were all so smart and grown up and everything, and they're not. They're not even as grown up as me!

  • Mick: But, Mama... I wanna make something of myself, Mama. I got this feelin' inside me like I was destined for something.

    Mrs. Kelly: We all have that feelin' when we are young. It will pass!

    Mr. Kelly: Margaret, don't!

    Mick: Well, I know it won't be easy, but without a high school diploma, what chance have I got?

    Mrs. Kelly: The same chance I had. You'll meet some fella and get married. If you're lucky, you'll love him. You'll have kids. That's what life is, Mick. That's all it is!

  • Mick: [Lying on the beach on a blanket] Kiss me, Harry. Kiss me the way married people kiss.

    Harry: Do you think we should?

    Mick: Please let me have just one thing the way I want it to be.

    [He kisses her]

  • Mick: If I knew college was gonna be this interesting, I might have paid a little bit more attention in school.

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Characters on Crocodile Dundee II (1988)