Meredith Blake Quotes in The Parent Trap (1998)

Nick Parker: What's going on?

Meredith Blake: Here's what's going on, buddy: the day we get married is the day I ship those brats off to Switzerland, get the picture? It's me, or them. Take your pick.

Nick Parker: Them.

[Hallie and Annie stare at each other excitedly]

Meredith Blake: Excuse me?

Nick Parker: T-H-E-M, them.

[staring into Meredith's face]

Nick Parker: Get the picture?

Nick Parker: I told Hallie.

Meredith Blake: You did? And?

Nick Parker: She went ballistic. She started yelling in French. I didn't even know she spoke French.

Annie: Need a hand, Mer?

Meredith Blake: Not from you, thank you. Don't think I can see past those angelic faces. One more trick from you two, and I promise I'll make your lives miserable from the day I say "I do." Got it?

Hallie: Got it, Cruella.

Meredith Blake: What did you call me?

Hallie: Nothing. Nothing. Not a thing, Cruella. Oh, by the way, Mer. I think there's something on your head.

[the lizard is on her head]

Meredith Blake: Have you seen your father?

Hallie: [Not yet aware who Meredith is] You talking to me?

Meredith Blake: Who are you, Robert De Niro? Yes, I am talking to you.

Meredith Blake: You know, from the way your father talked about you, I expected a little girl, but you are so grown-up.

Annie as Hallie: I'll be twelve soon. How old are you?

Meredith Blake: [chuckling] Twenty-six.

Annie as Hallie: Only fifteen years older than me! How old are you again, Dad?

Nick Parker: Wow, suddenly you're so interested in math!

Nick Parker: [hiking] I'm going to take the lead. You two help Meredith.

Meredith Blake: [looks at the girls] Sure you'll help me. Right over a cliff you'll help me.

Hallie: [whispering to Annie] Not a bad idea.

Annie: Yeah, see any cliffs?

Meredith Blake: First change I make is to send that two-faced little brat off to boarding school in Timbuktu.

Richard, Meredith's Assistant: Oof, Ice Woman!

Meredith Blake: Proud of it, babe!

Elizabeth James: [having drink with Meredith] Here's to... here's to you. May your life be far less complicated than mine.

Meredith Blake: Why thank you.

Annie as Hallie: I know what mystery my father sees in you.

Meredith Blake: You do?

Annie as Hallie: You're young, beautiful, sexy, and hey, the guy is only human, but if you ask me marriage is supposed to be based on something more than just sex, right?