Maya Quotes in 22 Jump Street (2014)


Maya Quotes:

  • Mrs. Dickson: So, how did you and Doug meet?

    Maya: We met at a party and then he stalked me to my dorm room.

    Captain Dickson: Stalked you? And then what happened?

    Maya: Then, we hung out and watched a movie.

    Maya: [pause for a second] Actually, we watched it a couple times.

    Captain Dickson: This is bullshit! Waiter, can a black man get some water?

    Schmidt: Someone get the fucking man some water. He's black, he's been through a lot!

  • Captain Dickson: [see's Schmidt dating his daughter maya] How do you know this person?

    Maya: Dad, this is Doug, he's a guy I'm dating.

    Captain Dickson: What the fuck?

  • Maya: Your late

    Will Salas: Need a minute

    [he hand's her 1,000,000 years of time]

  • Antonio Pope: Name?

    Maya: Prince Admiral Stephen Matumbay.

    Ben Barber: Plus my two servants.

    James Payton: I'm not your servant.

    Ben Barber: [he slaps James] You are what I say you are!

    Maya: [James slaps Ben back] Sign of respect.

    Ben Barber: I can't feel my face.

  • [Michael begins to suspect that the woman with him isn't really Rachel]

    Michael Jennings: What's my favorite baseball team?

    Maya: What?

    Michael Jennings: What's my favorite baseball team?

    [Maya pulls out a gun]

    Maya: Who cares?

    [Rachel appears behind Maya and knocks her out]

    Rachel Porter: That would be the Red Sox?

  • Maya: [pretending to be Rachel] You can't remember me.

  • [first lines]

    Maya: [breathless] George...

    George Kuffs: Uh huh.

    Maya: I'm pregnant, George.

    George Kuffs: Are you sure?

    Maya: Yes.

    George Kuffs: Well, how long?

    Maya: Over 2 months.

  • [Entering Kuffs's bullet-riddled apartment]

    Maya: What happened here?

    George Kuffs: Termites.

  • Dr. Neil Connery: It's going to blow up soon. Maybe even tomorrow. With you on board.

    Maya: You read too many novels by Fleming.

  • Mâya: Emeraldas, forgive me. I didn't want to see Harlock a slave. That's why I called to him to escape via the Voice of Free Arcadia. As a result, Zoll died, and you have a scar on your beautiful face that will last a lifetime, and many people were captured and wounded. All of it, coming from my broadcasts. I should have been executed.

    Queen Emeraldas: That's not true. Even without your broadcasts, sooner or later the people of Earth, Zoll and I would have done this. Harlock, Tochiro and LaMime would surely have taken the same path.

  • [Harlock listens to a recording]

    Mâya: You, who are setting out with the flag of freedom flying, goodbye, until the day you return. I believe that no matter how far away you may be, you will never forget Earth. No one can stop you setting out on your journey under your flag. Goodbye. But, it is because you are such a man, who has always believed in tomorrow, never losing dreams or hope, that I remember with pride the days when I talked with you. I pray that your future will be as you believe. Goodbye, my Harlock. Please live, no matter what. I can see, burning in your heart, the red flame of belief in the future. I can see the fire burning of a man who will never betray his friend. It's because you are such a man, that I love you. I will become one of those fires in your heart, I will become that fire, and I will burn forever... Harlock.

  • Mâya: This is the Voice of Free Arcadia. The sun sets, and rises again. The future does not come to those who don't believe in it. All who believe have endured for long, and will someday meet up with you. Someday we will combine our forces and live the future with you. No matter how small a flame there may be, do not let it go out. Believe in our tomorrow...

  • Mâya: [on the radio] This is frequency 6050, using variable micro-current cycles... The sun which set yesterday will rise again this morning. And we believe that sun will rise again tomorrow...

    Captain Harlock: That voice...

    Mâya: We believe in our future. Hear me, those who try to live, those who can live, on Earth...

    Captain Harlock: Maya...

    Mâya: Though the ground was burnt and everything turned into ashes, we will revive again. The sky is still blue, the crashing waves from long ago are unchanged. This is Earth, our planet. This dream is in the hearts of people; so long as they do not abandon it, it will not fade away. For the sake of tomorrow, keep a song in your heart. For the sake of our future, let us stop our crying and stand on our ground firmly.

  • Mâya: [singing] Thought the night goes on, the sun will not die. At the end of the darkness, it will keep shining. Lift up your faces, friends, and look up at the dawn. Friends who still do not see, tomorrow will surely come. Within the frozen ground, the flower's secret life continues on. Friends, do not lose the seed of hope. Friends whose names I do not even know, tomorrow will surely come...

  • Mâya: [on the radio] However great the suffering, think of it as a harbinger for making tomorrow's meeting even more beautiful, and please do not succumb to seductive despair. Do not forget the freshness of the dawn, or the wind; please remember that day when we ran hand in hand through that green field, overflowing with love...

  • Mâya: Harlock...

    Captain Harlock: Maya, watch out! Take cover!

  • Maya: Harlock... No! Don't come any closer! I'm glad you've come this far! Run, quickly!

    Captain Harlock: You're telling me to leave, and abandon you?

    [Harlock steps towards Maya]

    Maya: No! You must stay away! Dying will accomplish nothing! If we live, we can meet again someday. The day will surely come when we see the sun and smile...

    [Harlock keeps going]

    Maya: Harlock! Stay away! Stay away, Harlock...

  • [Harlock is shot in the eye]

    Mâya: Harlock!

    Captain Harlock: Maya!

  • Queen Emeraldas: Maya, Harlock and his crew are returning to Earth. I hear he openly requested landing clearance from Zeda.

    Mâya: If he returns to Earth, he will again experience hardship...

    Queen Emeraldas: Even so, he is returning. Harlock is that kind of man. The next time Harlock and the others leave Earth, let's go with them. You've done all you can for Earth.

  • Maya: This is the Voice of Free Arcadia. I will report our new frequency using the variable micro-current cycles... 8390... 8390... This is the Voice of Free Arcadia. Let us go to the desert, bearing flowers. Let us go meet hope, bearing flowers.

  • Mâya: [on the radio] This is the Voice of Free Arcadia. If you burn yourself out, only ashes will remain. A fire of living hope will never go out. Someday it will spread from person to person as a wildfire, and with their hands a new future is born. In order to protect that fire, no one laughs, even if you go far away tomorrow. People will believe that you will surely return...

    [a shot interrupts the broadcast]

    Captain Harlock: Did she get out?

    Queen Emeraldas: I can envision her: the kind of person whom, within a gentle body that seems it may shatter when touched, holds fiery magma. That broadcast just now was a personal message to someone; she sent it aware of the danger...

  • Mâya: I haven't got long to live now, so let me see Harlock's ship on its passage...

  • Mâya: This is the Voice of Free Arcadia... I am Maya. People of Earth, I wanted to keep calling to you always... I wanted to keep singing... but I... I cannot go on any longer... please, forgive me... this is the last of the Voice of Free Arcadia...

    [slumps to the ground]

    Captain Harlock: Maya!

    [takes her in her arms]

    Mâya: This...

    Captain Harlock: Maya! It's all right! It's all right!

    Mâya: Harlock... I truly believed that you would come back... that you were the kind of man... who could keep a promise even to a dead friend...

    Captain Harlock: Let us go together to that Sea of Stars.

    Mâya: I have been... dreaming for so long... of going to that Sea of Stars with you... like Heiligenstadt... our Arcadia... where we ran... together...

    [closes her eyes... ]

    Tochirô Ôyama: Maya!

    Captain Harlock: Maya, Maya! I had so many things to tell you, so many things to ask you... Maya!

  • Zed: Look, I want you to know... I blame myself for everything that's happened.

    Maya: Yeah, so does everybody else.

  • Zed: Can I see you later?

    Maya: I think I have to wash my hair.

    Zed: You washed your hair last year.

  • [last lines]

    Zed: To the north!

    Maya: You know that that's west.

    Zed: Mmm hmm, yeah, I was just checking to see if you knew. To the west!

    [under his breath]

    Zed: I'm already glad you're here.

  • Maya: When my parents were killed by that pack of wild dogs, you really helped me see the funny side.

    Zed: [imitating dogs barking] "No, no! He's got my ankle!"

  • Maya: Arf arf arf arf!

    Max: Arf Arf!

  • Maya: You know, can I ask you a personal question, Miles?

    Miles Raymond: Sure.

    Maya: Why are you so in to Pinot?

    Miles Raymond: [laughs softly]

    Maya: I mean, it's like a thing with you.

    Miles Raymond: [continues laughing softly]

    Miles Raymond: Uh, I don't know, I don't know. Um, it's a hard grape to grow, as you know. Right? It's uh, it's thin-skinned, temperamental, ripens early. It's, you know, it's not a survivor like Cabernet, which can just grow anywhere and uh, thrive even when it's neglected. No, Pinot needs constant care and attention. You know? And in fact it can only grow in these really specific, little, tucked away corners of the world. And, and only the most patient and nurturing of growers can do it, really. Only somebody who really takes the time to understand Pinot's potential can then coax it into its fullest expression. Then, I mean, oh its flavors, they're just the most haunting and brilliant and thrilling and subtle and... ancient on the planet.

  • Miles Raymond: What about you?

    Maya: What about me?

    Miles Raymond: I don't know. Why are you into wine?

    Maya: Oh I... I think I... I originally got in to wine through my ex-husband.

    Miles Raymond: Ah.

    Maya: You know, he had this big, sort of show-off cellar, you know.

    Miles Raymond: Right.

    Maya: But then I discovered that I had a really sharp palate.

    Miles Raymond: Uh-huh.

    Maya: And the more I drank, the more I liked what it made me think about.

    Miles Raymond: Like what?

    Maya: Like what a fraud he was.

    [Miles laughs softly]

    Maya: No, I- I like to think about the life of wine.

    Miles Raymond: Yeah.

    Maya: How it's a living thing. I like to think about what was going on the year the grapes were growing; how the sun was shining; if it rained. I like to think about all the people who tended and picked the grapes. And if it's an old wine, how many of them must be dead by now. I like how wine continues to evolve, like if I opened a bottle of wine today it would taste different than if I'd opened it on any other day, because a bottle of wine is actually alive. And it's constantly evolving and gaining complexity. That is, until it peaks, like your '61. And then it begins its steady, inevitable decline.

    Miles Raymond: Hmm.

    Maya: And it tastes so fucking good.

  • Maya: What's the title?

    Miles Raymond: The Day After Yesterday.

    Maya: Oh... You mean today?

  • [last lines]

    Maya: [on answering machine] Hello, Miles. It's Maya. Thanks for your letter. I-I would have called sooner, but I think I needed some time to think about everything that happened and... what you wrote to me. Another reason, um, I didn't call you sooner is because I wanted to finish your book, which I finally did last night. And I think it's really lovely, Miles. You're so good with words. Who cares if it's not getting published? There are so many beautiful and... painful things about it. Did you really go through all that? Must have been awful. And the sister character - jeez, what a wreck. But I have to say that, well, I was really confused by the ending. I mean, did the father finally commit suicide, or what? It's driving me crazy. Anyway, it's turned cold and rainy here lately, but I like winter. So, listen, if you ever do decide to come up here again, you should let me know. I would say stop by the restaurant, but to tell you the truth, I'm not sure how much longer I'm gonna be working there, because I'm going to graduate soon. So, I'll probably want to relocate. I mean, we'll see. Anyway, like I said, I really loved your novel. Don't give up, Miles. Keep writing. I hope you're well. Bye.

  • Maya: You know, the day you open a '61 Cheval Blanc... that's the special occasion.

  • Maya: So is it kind of about death and mortality, or...?

    Miles Raymond: Mrnmm, yeah... but not really. It shifts around a lot. Like you also start to see everything from the point of view of the father. And some other stuff happens, some parallel narrative, and then it evolves - or devolves - into a kind of a Robbe-Grillet mystery - with no real resolution.

  • Maya: So, what gems do you have in your collection?

    Miles Raymond: Oh, its not much of a collection. I mean, its more like a small gathering in a cabinet. I-I've never really had the wallet for that. I just have to live bottle to bottle.

  • Maya: I think - this guy's more our speed.

    Miles Raymond: Andrew Murray. Well, okay.

  • Maya: I'm the queen of typos.

  • Maya: Do you have any idea what he's been saying to her?

    Miles Raymond: Well, he's an actor - so it can't be good.

  • Maya: I saw your friend Gordon this morning

    Dennis: I'll replace anything he stole.

  • Maya: Forget about what you thought you were and just accept who you are.

  • Maya: I do it at least twice a day.

    Ollie: Good God!

  • Ollie: Why don't you go get yourself a boyfriend?

    Maya: Why don't you go get yourself a girlfriend?

    Ollie: I spend all day working and spend all night with my kid.

    Maya: So you would rather spend time with your daughter than get laid?

    Ollie: Yeah.

    Maya: That's sweet. I'm kind of crushing on you, Trinke.

  • Maya: That was kinda sweet. I'm kinda crushin' on you right now, Trinke.

  • Maya: Man cannot live on porn alone.

  • [Last lines]

    Maya: Mommy, are you okay?

    GarrettErinCorinnePhil: *Maya, statue.*

  • Maya: If I don't laugh at something that I'm supposed to, then please feel free to just kick me so I understand.

  • Maya: Knowing love, I can allow all things to come and go, to be as supple as the wind and to face all things with great courage.My heart is a open as the sky

  • Maya: [At Tara's wedding] Oh Tara... all my life I have been wearing your used things. Now... something I have used will be yours forever.

  • Maya: I loved being with him. I would have done anything just to be with him.

    Teacher of the Kama Sutra: What kind of love are you talking about? Real love? If you're looking for real love, you've chosen the hardest task of all, the work for which all other work is but preparation.

    Maya: But I was ready. I wanted to give myself to him.

    Teacher of the Kama Sutra: Love does not mean surrendering, "losing yourself". It is a call to ripen. Don't look for straight lines, Maya. Life is never like that.

  • Tara: If you are not properly attired, you will not exhilarate my husband.

    Maya: Exhilaration is my department.

  • Maya: I will make my *own* destiny.

  • Maya: Do you think that because the King desires me, it makes me happy?

    Tara: Does it not?

  • Maya: If I can't use the rules of love on the one I love, I'll use them on the ones I don't.

  • Maya: [to Jai] You were the one that talked about love all the time. And now it's facing you, and you run from it.

  • Maya: You have me. But I ask only one thing... Please free him. Please? Please? Please, I'm begging you! I will do anything.

    Raj Singh: No, I want more than this! I want your heart. In your heart please give him up

    Maya: If you free him.

  • [from trailer]

    Maya: SAAMMM!

    [a claw traps Sam]

  • C.I.A. Director: What's this - this cluster of buildings down here?

    George: The PMA - it's the Pakistani Military Academy.

    C.I.A. Director: [looks at him incredulously]

    George: It's their West Point.

    C.I.A. Director: And how close is it to the house?

    George: About a mile.

    Maya: Four thousand, two hundred, twenty one feet; it's closer to eight-tenths of a mile.

    C.I.A. Director: Who are you?

    Maya: I'm the motherfucker that found this place. Sir.

  • Maya: [to Navy SEALs] Quite frankly, I didn't even want to use you guys, with your dip and velcro and all your gear bullshit. I wanted to drop a bomb. But people didn't believe in this lead enough to drop a bomb. So they're using you guys as canaries. And, in theory, if bin Laden isn't there, you can sneak away and no one will be the wiser. But bin Laden is there. And you're going to kill him for me.

  • Maya: [slightly irritated] So what does this Baluchi guy look like?

    Abu Faraj al-Libbi: Tall, long white beard, thin, walks with a cane.

    Maya: [smirks] Kinda like Gandalf.

    Abu Faraj al-Libbi: Who?

  • Maya: So, you agree with me now, this is important?

    Tim - Station Chief: No, I just learned from my predecessor that life is better when I don't disagree with you.

  • Maya: I'm going to smoke everyone involved in this op and then I'm going to kill bin Laden.

  • Maya: 100% he's there. OK, 95%, 'cause I know certainty freaks you guys out, but it's 100.

  • Maya: You can't run a global network of interconnected cells from a cave.

  • Joseph Bradley: How do you like Pakistan so far?

    Maya: It's kinda fucked up.

  • Ammar: Please help me.

    Maya: You can help yourself by being truthful.

  • Maya: Don't eat out, it's too dangerous.

  • Jessica: Where's Jack?

    Maya: Probably stuck in some checkpoint somewhere.

    Jessica: You two hooked up yet?

    Maya: Hello, I work with him. I'm not that girl that fucks. It's unbecoming.

    Jessica: So? Little fooling around wouldn't hurt you.

  • C.I.A. Director: May I join you?

    [sits down]

    C.I.A. Director: How is the food down here anyway?

    Maya: Uh, it's okay.

    C.I.A. Director: How long have you worked for the CIA?

    Maya: Twelve years. I was recruited out of high school.

    C.I.A. Director: Do you know why we did that?

    Maya: I don't think I can answer that question, sir. I don't think I'm... allowed to... answer.

    C.I.A. Director: Alright. What else have you done for us? Besides Bin Laden?

    Maya: Nothing. I've done nothing else.

    C.I.A. Director: Well, you certainly have a flair for it.

  • Dan: State your request.

    Maya: Move Heaven and Earth and bring me this fuckng Sayeed's family phone number.

    Dan: Okay, I'll go and talk to "The Wolf."

  • Maya: All women are princesses, it is our right.

  • [Yasmin comes downstairs in an "I Can't Think Straight" t-shirt]

    Yasmin: [to her concerned father, regarding her mother] Don't worry, she won't get it.

    Maya: Get what?

    Yasmin: Nothing.

  • Maya: You two are so worried about other cultures... London, Greece. What about your own heritage? Did you ever think about that? India has one of the richest cultures in the world.

    Yasmin: Well I'm glad you said that Mom, cause I'm thinking of spending six months out there... backpacking.

    Maya: You're not going backpacking. And in India of all places!

    Yasmin: What about the culture? The heritage?

    Maya: What about being raped and murdered? And clean underwear?

    Leyla: Are you going to take underwear Yasmin?

  • Maya: [referring to Ethiopian Bread] Will someone take this awful bread back to Africa where it belongs?

  • Maya: Are you trying to kill me? Creeping into the house like a robber.

  • Jared: You ever see how they look at you? The boys?

    Maya: Look at me how?

    Jared: Like a juicy plum their dry mouths aren't permitted to touch.

  • Maya: [sexily] You're my kinda guy. My hero. Not the kinda guy to wimp out. You know what it's like to have fun. You know how to let go and fuck the rules. You like things spontaneous, with bite and real risks. I remember that. I thought you were crazy, but you opened my eyes and made me realize we're not so different.

  • Jared: [blindfolded] You there?

    Maya: No more talking.

  • Maya: One more word and you lose the tongue.

  • Blake: [to Nick] You bastard!

    Maya: What did you do?

    Blake: You ran over his arm!

    Nick: No! He fall!

  • Maya: Dil bhole boom boom boom... My heart sings boom boom boom...

  • Maya: Yeh dil tere liye hai, yeh jaan tere liye hai... My heart is for you, my life is for you...

  • Maya: Pyar kiya nahin jata, ho jata hai... One cannot do love, as love happens...

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Characters on 22 Jump Street (2014)