Max Belfort Quotes in The Wolf of Wall Street (2013)

Max Belfort: What kind of hooker takes credit cards?

Donnie Azoff: A rich one!

Max Belfort: $430,000 in one month, Jordy. huh?

Jordan Belfort: They're business expenses.

Max Belfort: Jordy, look what you've got here. Look at this! $26,000 for one fucking dinner!

Jordan Belfort: No, no, this can be explained. Dad, we had clients, Pfizer clients. champagne.

Nicky Koskoff: The porterhouse from Argentina.

Jordan Belfort: Expensive champagne and the what, we had to buy champagne.

[to Donnie]

Jordan Belfort: And you brought in all the sides tell him about the sides.

Donnie Azoff: I ordered the sides, so...

Max Belfort: Sides? Sides? $26,000 worth of sides? What are these sides? They cure cancer?

Donnie Azoff: The sides did cure cancer, that's the problem, that's why they were so expensive.

Jordan Belfort: [bursting into laughter] Shut the fuck up!

Donnie Azoff: I'm serious.

Max Belfort: [hears a phone] Who the fuck has the goddamn gall to call this house on a Tuesday night? God damn it!

Leah Belfort: [watching TV] You're gonna miss it!

Max Belfort: Tell me something I don't know, I wait ALL WEEK for the fucking Equalizer and they have to fucking...

[picks up the phone]

Max Belfort: [calmly, in a transatlantic accent] Hello?... Jean? How are you, Jean?... Righto, Jean, That'll be great... Cheerio!

[hangs up]

Max Belfort: [explodes] Fucking half-wit!

Leah Belfort: You missed it!

Max Belfort: GOD... DAMN IT!

Max Belfort: This is obscene!

Jordan Belfort: It was obscene, in the real world. But who the fuck wanted to live there?

Donnie Azoff: The IRS, they allow for T&A, it's fine.

Max Belfort: T&E. T and E. It's T and E!