Margo Sperling Quotes in The Late Show (1977)

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Margo Sperling Quotes:

  • Margo Sperling: I'm gonna' go down to the police station and get a private detective's license. If we teamed up, we'd be great together.

    Ira: That's just what this town has been waiting for. A broken-down old private eye with a bum leg and a hearing aid, and a fruitcake like you.

  • Margo Sperling: [Ira has doubled over and collapsed from severe stomach pain] Ira, wait a second. We'll get you to the hospital.

    Ira: I'm not going to any goddamn hospital.

    Margo Sperling: You gotta' go to the hospital, so they can find out what's wrong with you.

    Ira: I know what's wrong with me. I got a perforated ulcer. It's starting to bleed again. They get me in the hospital, they'll want to operate.

    Margo Sperling: Let them. That's better than walking around like this.

    Ira: I will not go through another goddamn operation.

    Margo Sperling: Lay back down. There's nothing to be afraid of.

    Ira: It's my gut. It's my life. I won't let anybody call me a goddamn coward. I went through two operations last year on my gut. Two operations! Do you realize what it's like in a veterans' hospital... lying on your back for six months, with tubes and shit going every which way?

    Ira: [continues] Maybe I don't have much of a life right now, but it's better than that. But I'll be goddamned if I let those butchers open me up again. Never! I'll blow my brains out first...

    Margo Sperling: Stop it. Just stop it.

  • Ira: Why was, uh, this Escobar blackmailing you?

    Laura Birdwell: Well, I was seeing this man. We were having an affair.

    Ira: Your husband didn't know anything about it?

    Margo Sperling: Does the Pope shit in the woods?

  • [last lines]

    Ira: Mrs. Schmidt asked me to move out. That place next door to you, is that still empty?

    Margo Sperling: I don't know, Ira. I don't think I could take it. I mean you just never say anything, for God's sake. It's not fair, 'cause I have to keep up my side of the conversation and your side of the conversation. Yeah, that's it - you just never say anything, for God's sake. I want some feedback from you. I wanna... I wanna know what you think about things... and what you think about me.

    Ira: Jesus Christ, would it kill you if once and awhile you wore a goddamned dress?

  • Ira: One more thing, doll, about my fee... My fee. I get paid $25 a day, plus expenses.

    Margo Sperling: What's he talking about?

    Ira: Listen, sweetheart, you're talking to Ira Wells, not some low-rent gumshoe. I'm the best, and I get paid like the best.

  • Margo Sperling: You know what I had to go through to hassle up this dough? I laid off four ounces of pure red Colombian for $15 an ounce. I mean, it's disgusting. Some freak over on Pico thinks I'm Santa Claus, I swear to God. $15 an ounce... $15 an ounce. This grass was so great, I can't tell you. There was so much resin in it, it made your lips stick together.

  • Laura Birdwell: I am going to be totally open and honest with you. I'm going to lay myself naked before you. I hope you can appreciate that.

    Margo Sperling: He'll try.

  • Margo Sperling: Boy, it's really lucky for you that I just happen to be a very self-destructive person.

  • Margo Sperling: [to Charles] This car is not only a toilet, but you are the attendant.

  • [Margo has pictures of her cat, Winston, that she wants Ira to find]

    Margo Sperling: This little kitty is just a little honey bun. Give this little cat a break!

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Characters on The Late Show (1977)