Marcel Quotes in Inglourious Basterds (2009)

Fredrick Zoller: [shouting to the camera, acting in Nation's Pride] Who wants to send a message to Germany?

[Nation's Pride is interrupted by Shosanna's movie]

Shosanna Dreyfus: I have a message for Germany.

[Hitler and Goebbels watch in shock]

Shosanna Dreyfus: [her image on the screen smirks] That you are all going to die.

Adolf Hitler: [yelling in German] Enough! Stop it!

Joseph Goebbels: [yelling in German] Turn off the projector!

Shosanna Dreyfus: And I want you to look deep into the face of the Jew that is going to do it!

Joseph Goebbels: [in German as the audience begins to shout in protest and anger] I don't know what's going on! That does not belong in my movie!

Shosanna Dreyfus: [her image on the screen smiles] Marcel... burn it down.

Marcel: [standing behind the screen, he smiles] Oui, Shosanna.

Marcel: [in French; subtitled] What the fuck are we supposed to do?

Shosanna Dreyfus: [in French] It looks like we're supposed to have a Nazi premiere.

Marcel: Like I said, what the fuck are we supposed to do?

Shosanna Dreyfus: [in French; subtitled] I am going to burn down the cinema on Nazi night. And if I'm going to burn down the cinema, which I am, we both know you're not going to let me do it by myself. Because you love me. And I love you. And you're the only person on this earth I can trust. But that's not all we're going to do. Does the filmmaking equipment in the attic still work? I know the film camera does. How about the sound recorder?

Marcel: [in French] Quite well, actually. I recorded a new guitarist I met in a cafe last week. It works superb. Why do we need filmmaking equipment?

Shosanna Dreyfus: Because, Marcel, my sweet, we're going to make a film. Just for the Nazis.

Marcel: [in French; subtitled] What are we talking about?

Shosanna Dreyfus: [in French] Filling the cinema with Nazis and burning it to the ground.

Marcel: I'm not talking about that. You're talking about that.

Marcel: [seeing Shosanna dressed up for the premiere] Ooh la la... Danielle Darrieux.

Marcel: Do you think I am an idiot?

Tipa: Uh...

Marcel: There were two birds, chained together in a cage. How could you lose them?

Tipa: They outsmarted us, boss! But... but don't worry, we'll get them back. I have a plan.

Marcel: Oh, great! What're you gonna do? Wander the city calling 'here birdy-birdy, here birdy!'?

Tipa: Well, anything sounds dumb when you say it like that.

Marcel: [a boy places the cage holding Blu and Jewel on the table in front of Marcel] Well, what do you know? Good work, Fernando. You see, boys. What did I tell you about this one?

Tipa: That you were going to pay him half as much as you said?

[Marcel slaps Tipa in the face to shut him up]

Marcel: No! You idiot! That he reminds me of myself when I was that age. Smart, resourceful. Here you go, kid.

[he hands the boy some money]

Fernando: Hey! This is only half of what you promised me!

Marcel: Ah, shut up, kid!

[takes the cover off the cage to see Blu and Jewel looking dead]

Marcel: What the...?

[he picks up Jewel]

Marcel: I thought I told you I needed these birds alive! Tell me, Fernando, does this look alive to you? Huh?

[Jewel bites Marcel's thumb and flies away]

Fernando: So, what's going to happen to them?

Marcel: Don't worry. We're gonna find good homes for them. Now, go home to your mama.

Fernando: But I don't have a mama.

Marcel: Father?

Armando: Brother?

Tipa: Goldfish?

[Fernando shakes his head]

Tipa: Aw, can we keep him, boss?

Marcel: No!

[he shuts the door in Fernando's face]

Tipa: [hearing Marcel talking to his men through the door] So, Marcel, what's really gonna happen to those birds?

Marcel: Ah! Stuffed, eaten! Who cares! All I know is we're going to be rich!

Marcel: Nigel?

[Nigel flies over onto Marcel's shoulder]

Marcel: This bird is ten times smarter than the two of you combined.

Tipa: Yeah, well if he's so smart, then why don't you put him in charge?

Marcel: I am putting him in charge.

Armando: [to Tipa] Stop suggesting things!

Marcel: Go find them, Nigel.

[Nigel flies out of the window in search of Blu and Jewel]

Kate: There has to be another way for us to get to Jasper.

Marcel: Another way... another way... always another way... what am i... a travel agent?

Paddy: Well, i guess the birdie ruined your Birdie.

Marcel: You mark it "birdie" because it would have gone in.

Paddy: Technically, sir, it MIGHT have gone in.

Paddy: [Kate is about to marry Garth even though the two birds know she and Humphrey are in love] Now, I'm a stickler for tradition, but this one I just don't understand.

Marcel: These wolves are mysterious creatures.

Marcel: [in disgust] I hate cupcakes!

Marcel: Something isn't right in all of this, eh. I can feel it in my buns.

Inspector Milo Perrier: Your what?

Marcel: My buns.

Inspector Milo Perrier: Buns? Your buns? You bought buns and you didn't tell me? Where are they? Where are the buns?

Marcel: Oh! No, monsieur. The BONES in my body.

Inspector Milo Perrier: You should not speak with an accent when you know I am so hungry.

Marcel: I will tell everyone that you wear a toupee.

Inspector Milo Perrier: They already know!

Marcel: Then why do you wear it?

Inspector Milo Perrier: I didn't know that you knew.

Milo Perrier: Open my door.

Marcel: You have chocolate on your face.

Milo Perrier: What?

Marcel: Ze candy bar. It is all over your face.

Milo Perrier: Imbecile! That's my moustache!

Marcel: Lick it and see.

Milo Perrier: [licks his lips] Wipe it off. My hands are sticky.

Marcel: [licks handkerchief and begins wiping Perrier's face] Hold still please... Sloppy!

[Marcel comes into Lou's room and sees Betty in her underwear]

Marcel: I'm sorry, I thought you were alone.

Lou Peckinpaugh: I tried it that way. It's not as much fun alone.

Lou Peckinpaugh: You can pay, of course.

Paul DuChard: Ah, monsieur, we, we're not wealthy people. We lost over four million francs betting on the war.

Lou Peckinpaugh: Who'd you have?

Marcel: We took France - at eight to five.

Marcel: Gentlemen, may I present Miss Betty DeBoop from the Islands?

Colonel Schlissel: Caribbean or Virgin?

Betty DeBoop: Well, let's just say I came back a Caribbean.

Helene Flammarion: Odd, her coming here alone.

Marcel: I notice she didn't go home alone.

Marcel: Madame? A word with you.

Eve Peabody: With me?

Marcel: Yes, with you.

Eve Peabody: I thought so. Well, all right, let's get it over with.

Helene Flammarion: Poor Jacques! Oh, my soul, this is heaven. Baroness Czerny indeed! Of all the impudence. The consummate impudence! We'll take this with us.

Marcel: Now, Helene, don't let's hush this up and don't let's wait until tomorrow. Go on, let's have a lovely scandal!

Marcel: [In French, lifting himself on a pole] This is my secret. 30 times every morning.

Paul: [in English, starting to leave] Really, Marcello, I really don't know what she saw in you.

Marcel: How old are you?

Séverine Serizy: Twenty-three.

Marcel: Leave your stockings on. A girl tried to strangle me once. Poor thing.

Séverine Serizy: If you like, I won't charge you.

Marcel: Naturally. Plenty of girls would love to be in your place.

Marcel: [Séverine lies nude on the bed] Still won't tell me your name? You're not much of a talker. Fine with me. Girls that talk are a pain. Not bad. Too bad you've only got two. Let's have a look. Turn over.

Marcel: I don't get it. You seem to like being with me.

Séverine Serizy: Very much, but it's not enough.

Marcel: You love the other guy?

[Séverine nods her head yes]

Marcel: Then why are you here?

Séverine Serizy: I don't know. They're two different things.

Rosie: Thursty

[Marcel gives her a cocktail, she sips it]

Rosie: . Feet

[Marcel takes the cocktail away and massages her feet]

Marcel: Rosie?

Rosie: No. What did we agreed? What do you supposed to do the whole weekend?

Marcel: To take care that since Rosie can't go the the beautyfarm, the beautyfarm comes to Rosie.

Rosie: Exactly, perfect. Continue!

[Marcel massages her feet]

Rosie: Thursty!

Marcel: You're so delicious and I'm always so hungry.

Marcel: [Marcel and Lavond are escaping from prison] I have work to do. I've dreamt only of my work.

Lavond (as Madame Mandelip): Well, my work is no "dream" - I've been awake for 17 years!

Marcel: But you have only hatred in your heart. My work will help the world to live!

Lavond (as Madame Mandelip): And my work will help three men die.

Marcel: [Referring to Lachna, the servant girl] Malita, where did you get her?

Malita: In a Berlin slum. She's an in-bred peasant half-wit. But I wanted no prying wits about me.

Marcel: [Explaining why he thinks shrinking people and animals is a good idea] Lavond, my friend, millions of years ago the creatures that roamed this world were gigantic. As they multiplied, the earth could no longer produce enough food. Think of it, Lavond: every living creature reduced to one-sixth its size. One-sixth of its physical need. Food for six times all of us!

Marcel: Malita, get the big dog!