Male patient Quotes in Another You (1991)

Therapist: George, we have a nice man coming by to take you to the theater, the musuem, help you re-introduce yourself to the world. Are you ready for that, George?

George: I don't know.

Therapist: What did you tell me the other day? You said, I'm a Ready Teddy Yo! What did you say yesterday?

George: I'm a ready teddy yo.

Therapist: Are you afraid, George? That you'll go out there and start lying again?

Phil: [in a crazy English accent] No, No. He's just afraid of lyin. Isn't that right, Pinoch?

[means pinocchio]

Phil: Ya Ha Ha Ha Ha! He starts lyin', then his nose starts growin', I hate it when that happens. Ya Ha Ha Ha Ha!

Therapist: Now that's enough Phil, you let him talk.

Brad: Nah, he's afraid he'll see his old girlfried, and he won't be able to get it up.

Therapist: Is that true George?

George: No! Anyway, she dumped me.

Therapist: Why did she dump you, George?

Male patient: [stands up and points at George] She dumped you because you told her you were a brain surgeon!

Therapist: Did you tell her that, George?

George: No.

Therapist: What did you tell her?

George: Told her I was a paratrooper in the navy seals.

Phil: [in a Peter Falk Columbo voice] Wait! Are you saying that this man is not in our armed service? Did you know this? I didn't know this! I have egg on my face!

Therapist: George, George why did you feel like you had to lie to her?

George: Oh! She never would have looked at me twice if I had told her I was a Volvo Salesman for Horsch Muller!

Therapist: The guys put a little something together for you George, to help give you confidence in your new life.

Phil: [in William Shatner's voice] Very well Mister Spock. Gentleman, set your phasers on stun.

Tim: Ha Ha!

Phil: [still in William Shatner's voice] George, on behalf of my entire crew, Spock, Bones, Scotty

[makes the hand motions for emphasis]

Phil: We'd like to present to you a little gift we picked up on Rigel 4. It's our way of saying, good luck out there in the world. God Speed, show 'em what you're made of mister!

[salutes]

Tim: [makes the Vulcan hand sign for greetings and goodbye]

Phil: [still in the William Shatner voice] Live Long and Prosper! Go where no *man*, has... gone before!