Major John Smith Quotes in Where Eagles Dare (1968)

[Smith and Schaffer are observing the Castle of Eagles fortress, and a nearby military base]

Lt. Morris Schaffer: If I'm not mistaken, that's an army barracks over there.

Major John Smith: No mistake, Lieutenant. This the headquarters of the Wehrmacht Alpenkorps.

Lt. Morris Schaffer: Oh, swell. Do you have any other surprises I should know about?

Major John Smith: I thought you knew, Lieutenant. Why do you think we were chosen for his mission as if not to make social contact?

Lt. Morris Schaffer: You mean we're gonna go down there? Mingle with the German Army?

Major John Smith: Of course. Why do you think we're not dressed as German sailors?

Lt. Morris Schaffer: We'll be recognized as strangers.

Major John Smith: Training troops come and go all the time. What are six new faces among 600 new faces?

Lt. Morris Schaffer: Look, Major, this is primarily a British operation. I'm an American. I don't even know why the hell I'm here.

Major John Smith: Lieutenant, you're here because you're an American.

Major John Smith: Lieutenant, in the next 15 minutes we have to create enough confusion to get out of here alive.

Lt. Morris Schaffer: Major, right now you got me about as confused as I ever hope to be.

[repeated line]

Major John Smith: Broadsword calling Danny Boy.

Maj. Wilhelm Wilner: [into a phone] Major Wilner speaking. Ja, Colonel.

SS-Standartenführer Kramer: [into a phone] Can you describe him?

Maj. Wilhelm Wilner: [into the phone] That will not be necessary. Ask him to show you his right forearm.

Major John Smith: Certainly.

Maj. Wilhelm Wilner: [as Smith raises his sleve] There are two parallel scars, about three centimeters apart.

SS-Standartenführer Kramer: [into the phone] The scars are there.

Maj. Wilhelm Wilner: [into the phone] Ask how he get them.

SS-Standartenführer Kramer: [to Smith] How did you get those?

Major John Smith: I was born with them.

SS-Standartenführer Kramer: [into the phone] He says he was born with them.

Maj. Wilhelm Wilner: [into the phone] That is right. Tell him he's a traitor.

Major John Smith: Tell him he's a renegade.

Maj. Wilhelm Wilner: That is Schmidt. No question about it.

Lt. Morris Schaffer: [referring to what Smith called him earlier to maintain his cover] "Second rate punk," huh?

Major John Smith: All I could think of on the spur of the moment.

Lt. Morris Schaffer: Thanks, that makes it even worse.

Major John Smith: [smiles] Sorry.

[last lines]

Lt. Morris Schaffer: Do me a favor, will you? Next time you have one of these things, keep it an all-British operation.

Major John Smith: I'll try, Lieutenant.

Major John Smith: Nobody leaves here until I come back. Jock, save me some coffee.

Sgt. Jock MacPherson: It'll be cold by then.

Major John Smith: They say that's an advantage. You can't taste cold coffee.

Mary Ellison: I nearly froze to death in that damn plane. Why couldn't you have supplied some hot water bottles or an electrically heated suit? I thought you loved me.

Major John Smith: Can't help what you think.

[after Schaffer kills a German with a knife]

Major John Smith: That was quick.

Lt. Morris Schaffer: Fear lent him wings, as the saying goes.

Major John Smith: [referring to Colonel Turner] They say he knew Hitler quite well.

Lt. Morris Schaffer: Yeah, I THOUGHT he looked a little nuts.

Major John Smith: You're late.

Mary Ellison: One day, I won't come at all.

Major John Smith: Now, General Carnaby, perhaps you'll be good enough to give us your real name, rank and serial number.

[shoots the chair]

Gen. George Carnaby: [long pause, then] Cartwright Jones, Corporal, U.S. Army RA 123-025-3964.

Major John Smith: Thank you.

Lt. Morris Schaffer: There's a stop and start button.

[for the cable car]

Major John Smith: See if you can make the motor work.

Major John Smith: You are going up to the castle tonight as, well, yes as a domestic.

Mary Ellison: How? Naked?

Major John Smith: Not a bad idea, but it's a bit obvious.

[a large body of German troops led by field security chief Colonel Weissner storm into the guesthouse pub in a raid]

Col. Weissner: [addressing the crowd] Attention! We are looking for four or five Alpinekorps deserters from Studguardt. To escape they killed two officers and a guardroom sergeant. They were last known to be heading this way.

Major John Smith: [quitely to his men] Clever. Very clever indeed.

Col. Weissner: [continuting to the crowd] I want all the officers of Drafts 13, 14, and 15 to come forward at once!

[to his men]

Col. Weissner: Check their papers. Check them carefully.

Major John Smith: [to his men] Well gentlemen... any suggestions?

[Thomas, Christiansen, and Berkley are silent]

Major John Smith: [to Schaffer] Lieutenant?

Lt. Morris Schaffer: Well, I think we'll stand a lot better chance of getting away outside then we will in here.

Major John Smith: Agreed. Gentlemen... see you after the war.

Major John Smith: [In the Werfen gasthaus cafe] And who might you be, my pretty Alpine rose?

Heidi: Heidi. Stop, Major. I've got important work to do.

Major John Smith: There's no more important work than entertaining the soldiers of the Fatherland. Shall I sing you a song?

Heidi: I hear too much singing.

Major John Smith: [to Schaeffer] In your own idiom, you're a 'punk'. And a pretty second rate punk at that.

Mary Ellison: You must be mad.

Major John Smith: If I wasn't, what would I be doing in this job?