Luz Quotes in Machete Kills (2013)

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Luz Quotes:

  • Luz: I thought Machete don't text.

    Machete: Machete loves everybody.

  • Miss San Antonio: Watch it now Pussycat. That's not a very ladylike kinda thing to say.

    Luz: I don't do ladylike.

    Miss San Antonio: So what then, you're just a regular old cranky bitch? Or is it PMS?

    Luz: If it were PMS, you'd be dead already.

  • Luz: Takes a bitch to make a bitch. And I smell fish taco.

  • Luz: I knew I smelt bitch in the air tonight!

    Miss San Antonio: Payback's the only bitch you need to worry about! This dress costs more than your FUCKING LIFE!

    Luz: Didn't anybody ever tell you not to wear a dress to a gunfight?

    Miss San Antonio: Oh, baby, I always dress to the nines.

    Luz: I dress to kill.

  • Miss San Antonio: Really? You're gonna make me kill a blind chick? I'm pretty sure they're gonna take my crown for that.

    Luz: That's all right. They'll just give it to the next bimbo who spreads like butter.

  • Miss San Antonio: So now what happens?

    Luz: Ask the last guy who shot my eye out.

  • Title Card: [mock movie trailer] In a land beyond space and time...

    Trailer Voice Guy: A new world enslaved. This is a land in need of a hero.

    [Trejo removes his space helmet]

    Trailer Voice Guy: They call him... MACHETE.

    [echoing]

    Trailer Voice Guy: Machete Machete.

    Trailer Voice Guy: He knows the score.

    Space Babe: We need a leader. We need a revolution. We need you, Machete.

    Trailer Voice Guy: He gets the space babes.

    [deep kiss]

    Luz: The people needs us, Machete. This is a new network. It's all... galactic and shit.

    Machete: He thinks he's God in heaven. So heaven must fall.

    Trailer Voice Guy: And he kills the bad guys. Starring Danny Trejo, Michelle Rodriguez...

    Luz: Eat photons, bitches!

    Trailer Voice Guy: ...Alexa Vega. With Justin Beaver, as Bleep. And Lady Gaga, as

    [provoctive music]

    Trailer Voice Guy: whoever she wants to be. With special guest star Leonardo DiCaprio, as the Man in the Silver Mask.

    [in a lower voice]

    Trailer Voice Guy: Actor subject to change.

    [louder]

    Trailer Voice Guy: Machete Kills Again... in Space.

    [lower voice again]

    Trailer Voice Guy: Rated X for cigarette use, prolonged sexual content, pervasive language, and space violence.

  • Luz: One minute they're tearin' ass for the border, the next they're vanished. Disappeared without a trace. It's like aliens abducted by goddamn aliens.

  • Luz: I can't see, but I can still kick your ass.

    Voz: That's why I'm taking you with me.

  • Von Jackson: Habla inglés?

    Luz: Depends on the question.

  • Doc Felix: How's the eye?

    Luz: What eye?

  • Machete: Are you Shé?

    Luz: If I were Shé, do you think I'd be operating a taco truck? Shé brings hope. Shé rights the wrongs. Unfortunately, Shé is a myth.

  • [Torrez is about to behead Machete]

    Luz: He's gonna kill him.

    Sartana: No he's not. He's Machete.

    [Machete stabs Torrez through the stomach]

    Luz: Got a point.

  • Machete: You're a fighter.

    Luz: Only when there's something worth fighting for.

Browse more character quotes from Machete Kills (2013)

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