Lt. Gen. George Miller Quotes in In the Loop (2009)

Malcolm Tucker: General Flintstone... Was it you? Did you leak PWIP-PIP?

Lt. Gen. George Miller: No, I didn't leak it. I'm not like some little gay mercenary running around doing other people's dirty work.

Malcolm Tucker: Hey, I'm doing my own dirty work. I'm doing my job.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: I think you're doing Linton's dirty work. You're his little English bitch and you don't even know it. Bet if I came to your hotel room tonight, I'd find you down on all fours, him hanging out the back of you.

Malcolm Tucker: Oh, that's nice. That's really tough talk coming from the Armchair General. Put your feet up on a pouffe and go back to sleep, why don't you.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Look, Tucker, you might be some scary little poodlefucker over in England, but out here you're nothing. You know what you look like? A squeezed dick. You got a big blue vein running up your head all the way to the temple. See, that's where I'd put the bullet. Only I'd have to stand back 'cause you look like a squirter.

Malcolm Tucker: Have you ever even actually killed anybody? Really?

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Yeah.

Malcolm Tucker: Falling asleep on someone, that doesn't count!

Lt. Gen. George Miller: That's funny. What about you, pussy drip? Ever kill anyone?

Malcolm Tucker: Maiming's what I prefer. Psychologically.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Yeah? Why don't you try to maim me? I'll hit you so hard in the face you'll be shitting teeth.

Malcolm Tucker: Go right ahead. I can see the headlines now. "Peace-Loving General Starts Brawl in U.N., Swiss Intervene". I don't know, I'm no expert on spin but that could hurt your career.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Yeah?

Malcolm Tucker: Right. Do excuse me, I've got to get back to work.

[pause]

Malcolm Tucker: Don't ever call me fucking English again.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: [to Karen, about Linton Barwick ] He's got his little cannons and he's got his little guns, and... This is the problem with civilians wanting to go to war. Once you've been there, once you've seen it, you never want to go again unless you absolutely fucking have to. It's like France.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Twelve thousand troops. But that's not enough. That's the amount that are going to die. And at the end of a war you need some soldiers left, really, or else it looks like you've lost.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: So you're not resigning?

Karen Clarke: Are you still playing the hawk?

Simon Foster: Well, in... in a way I'm playing a much cleverer game than that... I'm a fake hawk.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: [pause] A what?

Simon Foster: ...Fake hawk?

Lt. Gen. George Miller: [pause] You're an idiot. Or are you a... fake idiot?

Lt. Gen. George Miller: 12:30.

Bob Adriano: Hold on. General? Yeah... Secretary Linton Barwick asked me to let you know that his last meeting looks like it's overrunning, he sends his apologies.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: When will he be here?

Bob Adriano: I don't have that information at this moment.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: What the fuck? Huh? Did he stand me up?

Bob Adriano: No, no, sir. You're more than welcome to wait.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Do you know what I'm gonna do? I'm going to take a nice big shit on his desk, just to let him know that I was here. Is that OK with you?

Bob Adriano: I don't think he'd like that too much, sir.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: My loyalty is to the kids. I am a soldier.

Karen Clarke: You're not a soldier.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: I've been a soldier my whole life! What do you mean I'm not a soldier? I'm a soldier! Look at the uniform - what, do you think I'm one of the fucking Village People?

Karen Clarke: When did you shoot a guy last?

Lt. Gen. George Miller: What, just because I haven't shot someone in fifteen years. I'm not a soldier? You know, the Army doesn't make you drag some bullet-ridden bloody corpse into the Pentagon every five years to renew your soldier's license!

Lt. Gen. George Miller: I'm a voracious reader. I'm the Gore Vidal of the Pentagon.

Karen Clarke: Gore's gay.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: No, he's not!

Karen Clarke: I beg to differ, but...

Lt. Gen. George Miller: He's gay? 'Cause I've been saying that Gore Vidal line.

Karen Clarke: He is gay.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: [pause] Guess I'd better stop saying that then.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: You're beautiful.

Karen Clarke: Oh, thank you. I'm sure you say that to all the girls.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Yes, I do... And some of the soldiers, too.

Karen Clarke: That's why you shouldn't run for office, bimbo eruptions.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Come on, don't believe that shit. I'm not gonna run for office. I'm just trying to do something different.

Karen Clarke: It's one of the reasons I like you. I know your passion about education and housing and...

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Lingerie.

Karen Clarke: There you go.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Bestiality.

Karen Clarke: I'd forgotten about that. Are you still allergic to the dog?

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Yes, yes, I wake up and my eyes are closed and my head is swollen and I look like a giant ball sac.

Karen Clarke: Oh, my God. You know, they do have modern medication for that sort of thing. Beautiful ball sac, though.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Thank you very much.

Karen Clarke: Yes, Assistant Secretary, on point six, it feels like there's already been an assumption that we're invading and don't you think that we should discuss the practical implications? I mean, this is, after all, the War Committee.

Linton Barwick: This is the Future Planning Committee.

Karen Clarke: Well, unofficially, it is called the War Committee.

Linton Barwick: Well, Karen, unofficially, we can call anything whatever we want. I mean, unofficially, this is a shoe, but it's not, Karen, it is a glass of water. And this is the Future Planning Committee.

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Well, unofficially, this appears to be bullshit.

Karen Clarke: I was going to eat lunch in here. Can you digest? Do you want some food?

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Oh, yes, I can digest, yes.

Karen Clarke: Chinese OK?

Lt. Gen. George Miller: Why don't you order me some little mammals? A little bunny and a little puppy, and a little cat, so I can twist their fucking neck off and drink their blood.