Laurel Quotes in The Cloth (2013)

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Laurel Quotes:

  • Laurel: My beliefs come before my own personal desires. In short, I'm here for God!

  • Jason: Corruption in the church, go figure!

    Laurel: There's no such thing as corruption in the church Jason! The only church that has ever existed, lies within.

    Jason: Never thought about it that way.

  • Laurel: [after Marrying her sister without considering it thoroughly] You fuck this up, I'll kill you!

    Jerry Maguire: I'm glad we had this talk.

  • Laurel: [to Dorothy] Don't cry at the beginning of a date. Cry at the end, like I do.

  • [Dorothy enters kitchen, catching Laurel eavesdropping]

    Laurel: I heard.

    Dorothy: No kidding. I looked over and saw the shadow of two curious shoes under the kitchen door.

    Laurel: Dorothy, this guy would go home with a gardening tool if it showed interest.

  • Dorothy: [referring to Jerry] He's coming over.

    Laurel: Tonight?

    Dorothy: He just lost his best client. I invited the guy over.

    Laurel: Dorothy, this is not a guy. It's a syndrome. Early mid-life. Hanging on to the bottom rung. "Dear God, don't let me be alone or I call my newly-long-suffering-assistant-without-medical for company settlement." If now all you still want is him to come over, I'm not saying anything.

    Dorothy: Honey, he's engaged.

  • Laurel: I'm incapable of small talk.

  • Laurel: I just don't want to be a virgin anymore, waiting for some fairy tale guy who doesn't exist.

  • Laurel: Why did I want you to leave?

    Basel: So your sister could move in.

    Laurel: That was nice of me.

    Basel: Yes, it was until you called me a creepy man-child and tried to kick me out. That was less nice.

  • Basel: What do you think, if you show me how you feel, I'm not gonna like you?

    Laurel: Yeah, maybe.

    Basel: Really? This isn't gonna last if it's like that. If this is real, we gotta tell each other the bad stuff. And if this isn't real, if this is just my kind of imagination... then I wanna know now.

  • Laurel: Melinda had a reputation for being Postmodern in bed.

  • Laurel: Melissa had a reputation of being post-modern in bed.

  • [upon seeing Anna]

    Laurel: Oo, another baby dyke trying to save the world.

  • Laurel: Just because I said that's what I wanted doesn't mean that's what I wanted. I mean, it may be what I wanted, but that doesn't mean I'm necessarily ready for it.

  • Laurel: [attempting to make polite conversation] So, Arnold, Ed tells me you're a transsexual?

  • Laurel: Check out Harold, one year later.

  • Father: [driving home after catching her in the cabin] What are you doing up here?

    Laurel: Did you follow me?

    Father: I asked you to stay away from him.

    [Michael]

    Laurel: Michael and I are getting married.

    Father: That's not gonna happen.

    Laurel: I'll be 18 next week. You can't stop us.

    Father: [eerily] You're gonna be 18.

    Laurel: Why do you hate him so much?

    Father: He has nothing to do with it. I hate myself. I had so many plans for you. Everything got spoiled.

    Laurel: Dad, what are you...

    Father: It was all my fault. I am so sorry for what I did.

    Laurel: Have you been drinking?... Dad?

    Father: [speeding up the truck] I didn't know what else to do.

    Laurel: [panicing] What are you talking about? Dad, can you slow down. Please.

  • Laurel: [scared as the truck speeds up] Let me out of this car!

    Father: The darkness is coming for you.

    Laurel: Let me out!

  • Laurel: [after the truck is wrecked, strained] Daddy, I-I don't understand.

    Father: I couldn't let you turn 18. I couldn't let them take you.

    [as he kills her]

  • Laurel: Ding dong, DING DONG!

  • Laurel: Thanks for the compliment. Don't expect one in return!

  • Laurel: [hanging by the skirt of her dress] I happen to like climbing in trees!

  • Laurel: Barratry.

    Anna: Barratry?

    Laurel: Arson, at sea.

  • Laurel: Hush! Judge, we don't speak of her here.

    Judge McWhirrey: My dear child, is she living?

    Laurel: In sin, Judge, in sin.

  • Laurel: Oh, if I could only be somewhere other than where I am, someone other than who I am!

    Miss Madrigal: There now, where and what do you want to be?

    Laurel: Dead... and in Hell!

  • Anna: They say five have left already.

    Miss Madrigal: Really?

    Anna: There must be something terribly frightening in this house!

    Laurel: That sounds like a perfect description of me!

  • Peter: [Laurel is seen kissing Dominic when a light, operated by Brett, is shined on them] Is our, uh, Cinderella ready to her scene, or does she still need time to warm up?

    Laurel: Brett, you're a fucking bastard!

    Brett: Arose by any other name.

Browse more character quotes from The Cloth (2013)

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