Larten Crepsley Quotes in Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant (2009)
Larten Crepsley Quotes:
-
Larten Crepsley: Thank you ladies and gentlemen. I am so excited to be here in an anonymous small town that used to have character but is now just a bland suburb filled with chain stores and surrounded by slums.
[awkward silence in audience]
Larten Crepsley: It really is a pleasure to be here. And I am SO honoured that bla bla bla and so on and so forth and etcetera ad nauseum.
-
Darren Shan: [From Trailer] So do I turn into a bat
Larten Crepsley: NO. That is Bullshit.
-
Larten Crepsley: Life may be meaningless, but I have real hopes for death.
-
Larten Crepsley: Nice night, actually...
[points up, causing Darren to look away]
Larten Crepsley: Is that the Little Dipper or the Big one? I can never remember it.
[Breaks Darren's neck]
Larten Crepsley: Sorry about that. I had to do that, or they would never believe you were dead. Don't worry; there's no damage to your spinal cord. And I'll sneak into the funeral home and fix your broken neck. Oh and... Sorry for this next part.
-
Larten Crepsley: [after Darren enters his room and turns on the light] Nice room. Some excellent reading material you have here. Thought this was on the internet now.
Darren Shan: Mine's blocked.
-
Larten Crepsley: Vampires don't need cellphones.
-
Larten Crepsley: I don't want you leaving camp anymore.
Darren Shan: Why not?
Larten Crepsley: Because I said so.
Darren Shan: You're not my dad you can't tell me what to do.
Larten Crepsley: [vampire pimp slap]
-
Larten Crepsley: Your mouth says no, but your beard says yes.
-
Larten Crepsley: [From Trailer] So do I turn into a bat
Darren Shan: No. That is Bullshit.
-
Darren Shan: He said something about, uh, souls and, uh, destiny. And he knew where I lived.
Larten Crepsley: Looks like you're in deep shit, my larcenous friend.
Browse more character quotes from Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant (2009)