Kenny McCormick Quotes in South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut (1999)


Kenny McCormick Quotes:

  • [the boys have just watched an edited version of "Asses of Fire" and are leaving the theater with the other kids, past the ticket booth again]

    Kyle: Man, this movie gets better every time I see it!

    Ticket Taker: Hey!

    Cartman: Yeah, but you know what? That whole part about lighting farts is bullshit. You can't do that.

    Kenny McCormick: [muffled] Yeah, you can!

    Cartman: [stops and turns] No way.

    Kenny McCormick: [muffled] Yes you can. You can *too* light a fart on fire.

    Cartman: Okay, Kenny. I'll bet you a hundred dollars you can't light a fart on fire.

    Kenny McCormick: [muffled] Yes you can. Check it out.

    [he lights his fart on fire and laughs; his parka suddenly erupts in flames and he screams in horror; the boys are shocked]

    Stan: Holy shit, dude!

    Cartman: Ah! Oh my God! Hey!

    [begins beating Kenny with a stick]

    Cartman: Aw, shit! Aw, shit!

    Stan: [steps forward and yells] Help! Somebody do something!

    [he steps back and the stick lights up]

    Cartman: Aahh! This stick is on fire!

    [an ambulance rushes up and stops, but a Russell's Salt truck rushes up and bumps it away; the truck bed lifts up at the front end and dumps the salt on Kenny; if the fire was injury, this is insult]

    Kenny McCormick: [muffled] Ooowww!

    [the ambulance siren dies and the salt doesn't move; the boys stare at the truck]

    Stan: Oh my God, you killed Kenny!

    Kyle: You bastard!

    Cartman: Wow, I guess you *can* light a fart on fire, huh?

  • Stan Marsh: Dude, dude, wake up!

    [Kenny does so and gets dressed]

    Stan Marsh: Kenny, come on!

    Kenny McCormick: [muffled] Coming!

    Stan Marsh: Kenny! The new Terrance and Phillip movie is out! You wanna come with me?

    Kenny McCormick: Yeah, dude! Come on, let's go, quick...

    [They walk away... ]

    Kenny's Mom: [appears at the door] Where'd you think YOU'RE going?

    Kenny McCormick: We're going to the Terrance and Phillip movie.

    Kenny's Mom: You can't, you gotta go to church.

    Kenny McCormick: But mom, I really wanna see this movie!

    Kenny's Mom: Fine. You go ahead and miss church. And then, when you die and go to hell, you can answer to Satan!

    Kenny McCormick: ...Okay!

Browse more character quotes from South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut (1999)