Joy McNally Quotes in What Happens in Vegas (2008)

[after Joy is dumped by her fiancé]

Tipper: You know what? I can get a couple of my brother's loser ass friends to go over to Mason's apartment , knock on the door and when he opens it wham! They'll junk-punch him all up in his man business and he'll fall to the floor whaling and crying "why?" and then we'll say "you know why!"

Joy McNally: Wow! Did you just make that up?

Tipper: No, I thought about it a lot on the way over

Joy McNally: Is there any part of the night, I don't know, maybe say the part where I was about to marry the rebound guy, that you thought, 'hey oh my God, this is a really good time for an intervention'?

Tipper: [extremely hungover] Seriously?

Joy McNally: Yeah.

Tipper: I like... threw up in my own purse... so...

Joy McNally: The grown-ups have to go to work today... What are you going to do all day?

Jack Fuller: I don't know yet

[shoves cereal in mouth]

Joy McNally: Hmph.

Jack Fuller: I'd rather do nothing and be happy than do something I know I don't love.

Joy McNally: Words to live by, Yanni.

Joy McNally: That's just the topping I wanted on my popcorn. I know the box said its movie theater butter, but you guessed it. What I really wanted was Jack's Sweaty ballsack flavor!

Jack Fuller: I'm just giving you what you want, baby.

Jack Fuller: If you stop betting, you never have to lose.

Joy McNally: I'd bet on you, Jack.

Jack Fuller: [standing outside the bathroom door] Can you hurry up?

Joy McNally: [from inside the bathroom, taking her time] Almost done!

[walks into the kitchen to find Jack pissing in their sink]

Jack Fuller: Oh yeah, this is really happening. Oh, and it's your day for dishes.

Jack Fuller: How hard can it be?

Joy McNally: I know how hard it isn't.

Jack Fuller: [before entering their first marital counseling session] You ready for this?

Joy McNally: Pretend that you don't make me vomit in my nose every time I look at you? Definitely.

Jack Fuller: Will to be married to me... again?

Joy McNally: [sighs] Being with you makes me be myself again so I will be married to you... again.

[they kiss]

Joy McNally: I quit my job.

Jack Fuller: Good thing we have a ton of money!

Chong: I eat girls like you.

Joy McNally: You eat girls?

Chong: That's not what I me...

Joy McNally: No, makes sense.

Chong: No! I'm not...

Joy McNally: Totally understandable.

Chong: Be whoever you want to be, you'll still gonna be my subordinate.

Joy McNally: Excuse me?

Chong: It's from the Latin, meaning "my bitch."