Jonah Baldwin Quotes in Sleepless in Seattle (1993)

Sam Baldwin: Didn't you see Fatal Attraction?

Jonah Baldwin: You wouldn't let me!

Sam Baldwin: Well I saw it and it scared the shit out of me! It scared the shit out of every man in America!

Jonah Baldwin: If you get a new wife, I guess you'll get to have sex with her, huh?

Sam Baldwin: I certainly hope so.

Jonah Baldwin: Will she scratch up your back?

Sam Baldwin: [shocked] What?

Jonah Baldwin: In the movies, women are always scratching up the men's back and screaming and stuff when they're having sex.

Sam Baldwin: How do you know all this?

Jonah Baldwin: Jessica's got cable.

Sam Baldwin: Oh.

Jonah Baldwin: A ho! A ho! My dad's been captured by a ho!

Sam Baldwin: I'll tell you what I'm doing this weekend, I'm getting laid. It's the 1990's and nobody's getting laid. I'm the only man in America who's getting laid this weekend and I haven't been laid that much. Six girls in college, maybe seven.

[sees Jonah standing in the doorway]

Sam Baldwin: How long have you been standing there?

Jonah Baldwin: Forever.

Sam Baldwin: What did you just hear me say?

Jonah Baldwin: Six girls in college, maybe seven.

Sam Baldwin: Seven... EIGHT! Mary Kelly.

Jonah Baldwin: [holds Annie's letter] This is the one I like!

[the Taxi Driver takes Jonah to the Empire State Building]

Taxi Driver: There it is. What are you gonna do when you get up there? Spit off the top?

Jonah Baldwin: No, I'm gonna meet my new mother.

Jonah Baldwin: Talk to her, dad. She's a doctor.

Sam Baldwin: Of what? Her first name could be Doctor.

Jonah Baldwin: Thanks for dinner. I've never seen potatoes cooked like that before.

Jessica: I am telling them you're twelve so you can fly unaccompanied and the stewardess won't carry you around and stuff like that.

Jonah Baldwin: Are you crazy! Who'd believe I'm twelve?

Jessica: If it's in the computer, they believe anything.

Jonah Baldwin: Are you sure?

Jessica: Do you want me to say that you are really really short for your age and they shouldn't say anything because it would hurt your feelings.

Jonah Baldwin: Yeah, that's a great idea!

Jonah Baldwin: What do you think happens to someone after they die?

Sam Baldwin: I don't know.

Jonah Baldwin: Like... do you believe in Heaven?

Sam Baldwin: [hesitates] I never did. I mean, the whole idea of an afterlife... But now, I don't know. 'Cause I have these dreams. About your mom. And we have these long talks about you and how you're doing, which she sort of knows, but I tell her anyway. So what is that? That's sort of an afterlife, isn't it?