Johnson Quotes in RoboCop (1987)

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Johnson Quotes:

  • [Morton and Johnson head to the elevator after the boardroom meeting]

    Bob Morton: Yes! Now that's how it's done in the big leagues, Johnson. You see an opening, you GO for it!

    [both walk into the elevator]

    Johnson: You better watch your back, Bob. Jones is gonna come looking for you.

    Bob Morton: Oh, fuck Jones. He fumbled the ball and I was there to pick it up.

    Johnson: Too bad about Kinney, huh?

    Bob Morton: That's life in the big city.

    Johnson: [about RoboCop project] When do we start?

    Bob Morton: As soon as some poor schmuck volunteers.

  • [ED-209 has malfunctioned and killed Mr. Kinney in a demonstration]

    Bob Morton: Somebody wanna call a *goddamn* paramedic? Let's go, Johnson!

    Johnson: [frantic] You pull the plug on this thing!

    [picks up phone and yells back to others]

    Johnson: All right, look, don't touch 'em. Don't *touch* 'em!

  • Bob Morton: How does he eat?

    Roosevelt: His digestive system is extremely simple. This processor dispenses a rudimentary paste that sustains his organic systems.

    Johnson: [Roosevelt dispenses the paste into a cup and hands it to Johnson] Tastes like baby food.

    Bob Morton: Knock yourself out.

  • Johnson: Don't mess with Jones, man. He'll make sushi out of you.

    Kinney: Yeah, you better be careful. Man, I hear Jones is a real shark.

    Bob Morton: [turns to Kinney] Who asked you, twerp?

  • Tyler: [while creating RoboCop] We were able to save the left arm.

    Bob Morton: What? I thought we agreed on total body prosthesis. Now, lose the arm, okay?

    Tyler: Jesus, Morton!

    [snaps his finger at RoboCop]

    Bob Morton: Can he understand what I'm saying?

    Roosevelt: Doesn't matter. We're gonna blank his memory anyway.

    Bob Morton: Well, I think we should lose the arm. Wha-what do you think, Johnson?

    Johnson: Well, he signed a release form when he joined the force. He's legally dead. We can do pretty much what we want to him.

    Bob Morton: Lose the arm.

    Tyler: Shut him down. Prep him for surgery.

    [looks down at RoboCop while his monitor vision shuts off]

  • McDaggett: Sergeant. We're taking Cadillac Heights. I'll need fifty of your men armed and in full body armor in one hour. Mr. Johnson, you can tell the C.E.O. the demolition crews will have total access at 0600 hours tomorrow morning.

    Sergeant Warren Reed: Hey, we don't do that kind of work.

    McDaggett: That was a direct order, sergeant.

    Sergeant Warren Reed: Driving people out of their homes is no work for a cop.

    Johnson: Now, sergeant... fifteen years on the force is quite an investment. Your job, your pension... Maybe instead of worrying about these squatter people, you might think about your OWN family.

    Sergeant Warren Reed: I am.

    [Takes off his badge and throws it on the floor]

    Sergeant Warren Reed: I'm thinking I have to go home and face them.

    [Reed leaves. One by one, other offices drop their badges and walk out as well]

    Johnson: You can't do this! Look, you are employees of O.C.P. Now remember that! You're jeopardizing your retirement benefits!

  • [Johnson and Fleck are walking in OCP, looking at the chaos around them]

    Fleck: Between me and you, Johnson, I think the CEO's startin' to lose it. I mean, take a look around, will you? It's the Fall of Rome around here! It's Darwin time, you know what I'm saying? Survival of the least expendable.

    Johnson: Remember the Old Man, Jeff. Everyone's expendable.

  • Johnson: That's the fourth one this month.

    Fleck: Chicken shit! I'd eat a bullet, myself. Less showy.

  • Johnson: You've disappointed me.

    Frank Martin: You won't be the first, and you won't be the last. I told you I wanted to do this in person.

    Johnson: That won't be necessary. You see, since we had our little chat at the beginning of the mission, I've been thinking I don't need the best man for this mundane assignment. Any idiot with a drivers' license will do, so, in the words of the great American Donald Trump, I'm sorry, but you're fired.

  • Johnson: [Valentina sees Frank's car racing alongside the train and smiles] What's so funny?

    Valentina: Hearing a dead man talking.

  • Johnson: I'd like to offer you a position.

    Frank Martin: I'd like to offer you one. Permanently disabled.

  • Alton: You calling me a racist?

    Johnson: Well, you don't like black Santa Claus. And last week, you told me you don't like black porno.

    Alton: Now hang on a damn minute. Now that's got nothing to do with racism. I like black chicks in porno movies. I just don't like 'em with the black guys in them, that's all.

    Johnson: Why come? They make you feel inadequate?

    Alton: No. Because their dicks are so dark. They get to fucking, their dicks get wet, they get glisteny and shit, and it's hard for my eyes to unfocus off it. Make me sick.

    Johnson: Eh, well, I guess you got a point.

  • Charts: [Wondering if Scott is a Viet Nam vet] So, uh, how long were you there?

    Kevin Scott: I wasn't. Too young.

    Johnson: [Looking a little skeptical] Is he goin' with us?

    Col. Cal Rhodes: He served with 4th Recon Marines.

    Johnson: "Served"?

    Kevin Scott: I was discharged for striking a radio operator who fell asleep at his post.

    Kevin Scott: [the other men look a little askance at him, but he continues] You're worried that I have no combat experience. You're right. There's no way of proving that I won't fail in combat. But then again, you can't prove that I will, either.

    Sailor: [Grinning mischievously at Scott] This is gonna' be a whole lotta' fun with this one.

  • Johnson: Red wine and uppers... that's why we call him Sailor. He used to take a lot of red wine and uppers, and just sail away.

    Charts: How come he wears that goddamned grenade around his neck?

    Blaster: Sailor always said, that if life got too shitty, he'd just pull the pin and see what's next.

  • Sheriff Ike Slayton: Brilliant plan, Colonel. Slaughter your own men, hand over more weapons to the convicts, maybe kill a few hostages along the way! What's your next masterplan? Nuke the town?

    Johnson: You're the one on the squad radio? Who the hell do you think you are, mister?

    Sheriff Ike Slayton: I'm a guy with a wife back in that town, you dumb son of a bitch!

    Billy: Save your breath, he can't hear you. Assholes don't have ears.

    Johnson: Ya know, you two have a serious attitude problem!

  • Johnson: [Referring to Eddie] I don't see why you keep that man around!

    Steve: Eddie was a good man before he became a rummy.

  • Johnson: What sort of a day will it be?

    Steve: I don't know. Just about like yesterday. Only better.

  • Cynthia Green: What is the matter with me, Mr. Johnson?

    Johnson: Everybody isn't required to like Africa, you know.

    Cynthia Green: I try to put on a show because I know he loves it so. But all of it - the hunting, the killing - terrifies me.

    Johnson: See here, this thing that he was talking about - the excitement - call it courage. The way he feels, it is a man's feeling, natural in a man, grows in a man, and makes him a man. Not particularly to his credit if he has it but something lacking if he hasn't. A woman shows her courage in other ways, - many ways.

  • Johnson: Why is it everyone who comes to Africa has to write a book about it? One silly beggar even dedicated his to me! Never came back or I'd have shot him in the pants!

  • Sgt. Reginald Cooper: [addressing his assistant] Driddle! Driddle...Driddle, change your name.

    Johnson: It's now Johnson, sir.

  • Stew Smith: Well, Gallagher!

    Gallagher: Hi!

    Stew Smith: Ohhh, I'm glad to see you! Hello, Hank, how are you?

    Hank: Oh, fine, but kind of thirsty...

    Stew Smith: Thirsty? Come right in, I'll get you a drink, huh?

    [starts to close door]

    Hank: Oh, say, uh, you remember Joe?

    Stew Smith: Sure.

    Hank: Well, I sort of invited him in to bend an elbow with us.

    Stew Smith: 'Sall right, 'sall right, 'sall right, bring him in.

    Hank: Come on, Joe, it's all right.

    Joe: All right!

    Stew Smith: Hello, Joe!

    Joe: Hello, kid, how are you?

    Stew Smith: Glad to see you, kid.

    [starts to close door]

    Joe: Say, just a minute.

    Stew Smith: Yeah?

    Joe: Johnson's outside. You don't mind if he comes in and dips the beak, do ya?

    Stew Smith: No, no, bring him in. More the merrier.

    Joe: [to Johnson] Hey, come on, come on.

    Stew Smith: Hi, Johnson!

    Johnson: Hello, Stew old pal, how are you?

    Stew Smith: Glad to see you.

    Johnson: I'm glad to see you.

    Stew Smith: Come on in, come on in.

    [starts to close door]

    Johnson: Say, lookit, wait a minute. I've got two of the boys I brought along with me, they're cruising around with nothing to do... you don't mind if I bring them in?

    Stew Smith: You brought two of them?

    Johnson: Yes.

    Stew Smith: That's all right, bring 'em in...

    Johnson: Come on in.

    Stew Smith: ...well, what's the difference?

    [... and the other 20 people come in]

  • Thornton: Alright listen up, douche-bags! All of ya! There's a load of toxic waste sittin' on the dock at TechStar, now who wants it? TechStar's throwin' in an extra two grand for this one... Z!

    'Z': I'm sorry Thornton man, my truck's runnin' real bad right now, needs a serious tune-up.

    Thornton: Johnson!

    Johnson: Hemroids! I... I got hemoroids.

    Thornton: You ARE a hemoroid... Jimmy!

    Jimmy: Whooping cough, boss!

    [coughs]

    Thornton: I was afraid of this...

    RafeVictor: [Both yelling loudly] Babeeeeey!

  • [the troop stops before a memorial]

    Johnson: Would you look at how fast they put the names of all our guys who got killed?

    The Sergeant: That's a World War One memorial.

    Johnson: But the name's are the same.

    The Sergeant: They always are.

  • Johnson: [concerning a woman in labor] How do you say "push" in French?

    The Sergeant: Poussez.

    Johnson: [to woman] Pussy! Pussy! Pussy!

  • Johnson: You know what your problem is Wilson? You need to listen for the pop.

    Wilson: Whoa, whoa. What's "the pop", Johnson?

    Johnson: That's the sound you're gonna make when your head comes out of your ass for the first time.

  • McDermott: You think I'm not aware of our situation? You think I want to stay isolated down here? You know, I'd make a desperate effort to raise somebody in hopes of getting away from your nasty mouth Steel! But the fact is... the fact is, either we are the only ones left, or there's no one within range my puny Second World War radio signals.

    Johnson: We used to talk to Washington all the time. They could hear us then.

    McDermott: We were on relays then. We weren't over the air. The power is off on the mainland now in case you haven't heard, and all the shopping malls are closed!

  • John: Gas up the machine. She's down to fumes.

    Sarah: No, wait 'til it's dark. There's too many of them out there.

    John: Hey, it's no good to leave the gas tank on the helicopter empty. Supposed we need to get out of here in a hurry?

    Sarah: Then we're shit out of luck! They're getting too riled up. Do it tonight after dark when they can't see you.

    John: They know we're in here even if they can't see us. What good is it to leave the gas tank empty?

    Sarah: The activity excites them! They're too many of them!

    Johnson: She's right. They're more and more of them every day.

    Sarah: If we get a lot more or if they might break down the fence, you can come out and shoot some of them. Otherwise say inside the building. Stay out of sight!

    McDermott: Thankfully you live out here in the suburbs, Johnson. You ougt to see how congested the cities are getting to be.

  • Johnson: [both ride bikes with a marathon] Hey, Sarah was looking for you last night.

    Rand: She was?

    Johnson: What's up with you two?

    Rand: I'm not sure. It doesn't make an sense.

    Johnson: What do you mean? Why do we have to make sense of everything?

    Johnson: Yeah it's nice to know when some low pressure system pushes moisture laid in the air over a heated land mass and that we need a fucking umbrella to get to work

    Johnson: Hey man, rain used to be with the gods of thunder cried.

Browse more character quotes from RoboCop (1987)

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