Joe Danby Quotes in Support Your Local Sheriff! (1969)

[after Joe shoots the cardplayer in the saloon, he claims it was self-defense]

Jason McCullough: Well, it may have been a lot of things, but self-defense it wasn't. And he didn't draw first - you did.

Joe Danby: What do you mean by that?

Jason McCullough: Oh, it's an old trick. You did it pretty well - not real well - but pretty well. You feinted with your left shoulder, getting him to go for his gun, while you were goin' for yours with your right hand at the same time. It's an old Arizona trick; but I... I have seen it used as far north as Montana.

Joe Danby: Are you callin' me a liar?

Jason McCullough: Well now, you heard every word I said and I didn't call you a liar. All I said was you feinted him into drawin' with your left shoulder while you were goin' for the gun with the right hand.

Joe Danby: So what?

Jason McCullough: You beat that poor man to the draw. He's dead and you're alive - that's the whole idea of the game, isn't it?

Joe Danby: What's your name?

Jason McCullough: Jason McCullough. What's yours?

Joe Danby: Joe Danby. And you had better remember it.

Jason McCullough: Oh, I'll remember it, Joe. That's about all I'm gonna do the rest of my life is go around rememberin' your name.

Joe Danby: Pa, you always told me there wasn't a jail been built that could hold a Danby.

Pa Danby: Well, now they've built one!

Joe Danby: Aww.

Pa Danby: You'll have to stay here for a couple of days.

Joe Danby: But we run this town.

Pa Danby: I gotta throw in with that sheriff that you don't exactly dazzle nobody with your intelligence.

Joe Danby: You expect me to sit here in this lousy cell on that...

[notices the red paint drippings on the floor]

Joe Danby: What is that red stuff all over the floor there?

Jason McCullough: Oh, uh...

[waves his boot over the paint]

Jason McCullough: ...that's the poor fella that crossed the line earlier today.

Joe Danby: I hear you're gonna try and arrest me. You know you don't look near as tough as some of them other sheriffs we've had lately. Particularly that old boy that done run off about an hour and a half after he took the job.

Jason McCullough: Joe, you just make me feel tired all over when you talk like that.

Joe Danby: Now, what do you mean by that?

Jason McCullough: It's bad enough to have to kill a man without having to listen to a whole lot of stupid talk from him first.

Joe Danby: [about his father] He's got a heart as big as the whole outdoors, but he don't have one brain in his poor old head.

Joe Danby: I'm gonna get you for this, Jake!

Jason McCullough: Well, you are the toughest talkin' blowhard I ever heard!