Jared the Airport Security Guard Quotes in Central Intelligence (2016)

Jared the Airport Security Guard: Sir, you cannot be in here! This is a private airfield.

Calvin Joyner: I understand that but I have an organ in this cooler right now that needs to be transported ASAP.

Jared the Airport Security Guard: Really? Because my sister-in-law had a heart transplant last year and they did not bring it in a Playmate lunch cooler.

Calvin Joyner: I hate to break it to you, but this is not a heart.

Jared the Airport Security Guard: It's not a heart?

Calvin Joyner: No, it's not.

Jared the Airport Security Guard: Hmm. What is it then?

Calvin Joyner: It's a dick.

Jared the Airport Security Guard: Okay. I'm made of questions right now.