Jane Caldwell Quotes in Head Office (1985)

Bob Nixon: Well, you are just screwing your way to the top, aren't you?

Jane Caldwell: I wouldn't be much of an executive if I screwed my way to the bottom. Would I?

Jane Caldwell: Don't fall for it, Jack.

Jack Issel: Fall for what?

Jane Caldwell: For the lie we keep telling ourselves. We do the dirty stuff to get the power. It'll give us all the good things we really want. Then we get the power, we can't even remember what goddamn thing what it was we wanted it for in the first place.

Jane Caldwell: Women rise so much in this compay. But I intend on going to the top. As Mr. Gross' replacement as head of public relations, you will work for me now and report all work to me. By the way, I wanted to inform you that you've been promoted to executive vice president of external relations.

Jack Issel: But this is just my first week.

Jane Caldwell: Then you must have good friends upstairs. But don't give your hopes up. It's basically the same job you had in the complaints department but with 10% more salary and 90% more responsibility.

[takes the papers that Jack has]

Jane Caldwell: Is this for me?

Jack Issel: It's just a complaint.

Jane Caldwell: [reading the complaint] What is the Allenville 25,000?

Jack Issel: That's the population of a small town upstate that's fighting to have their textile plant stay open. We're closing the plant at the end of this week and all employees will be layed off.

Jane Caldwell: So?

Jack Issel: So I was thinking if we can find a way to keep the plant open and find some securities for the workers.

Jane Caldwell: Very good. Write up a report.

Jack Issel: Write up a report?

Jane Caldwell: Mr. Dantley appreciates all the necessary information before he makes a major decision. Information is power, Jack.

Jack Issel: I agree. Absolutely.

[Jane walks back to her desk where she sits down and begins applying makeup and stares seductivly at Jack]

Jane Caldwell: Did you want something else?

Jack Issel: Uh... no ma'am!

[Jack exits]

Jane Caldwell: What do you think, Jack?

Jack Issel: It's perfect.

Jane Caldwell: Perfect. That's perfect... this is perfect.

[She exhales cigarette smoke]

Jane Caldwell: I'm perfect.

Yonge's Secretary: We have most INC management women with us, Jane. We certainly hope you're behind us.

Jane Caldwell: [perusing Huncho magazine] God, yes, absolutely, 100%!

Yonge's Secretary: We have to go in united as women!

Jane Caldwell: [puts back magazine] Oh, I agree, absolutely! As women, 120%!

Jane Caldwell: When I said "write up a report", I wanted you to go out there in the field and listen to what those Allenville protestors had to say! Not make some lunatic suggestion... using my computer key! That could destroy everything that I've worked for to get ahead in this company and take me right back to the steno pool.