James Bond Quotes in Casino Royale (2006)
James Bond Quotes:
Vesper Lynd: [sitting on opposite sides of the dinner table, discussing poker skills on the train heading towards Montenegro] What else can you surmise, Mr. Bond?
James Bond: About you, Miss Lynd? Well, your beauty's a problem. You worry you won't be taken seriously.
Vesper Lynd: Which one can say of any attractive woman with half a brain.
James Bond: True. But this one overcompensates by wearing slightly masculine clothing. Being more aggressive than her female colleagues. Which gives her a somewhat *prickly* demeanor, and ironically enough, makes it less likely for her to be accepted and promoted by her male superiors, who mistake her insecurities for arrogance. Now, I'd have normally gone with "only child," but, you see, by the way you ignored the quip about your parents... I'm gonna have to go with "orphan."
Vesper Lynd: All right... by the cut of your suit, you went to Oxford or wherever. Naturally you think human beings dress like that. But you wear it with such disdain, my guess is you didn't come from money, and your school friends never let you forget it. Which means you were at that school by the grace of someone else's charity: hence that chip on your shoulder. And since your first thought about me ran to "orphan," that's what I'd say you are.
[he smiles but says nothing]
Vesper Lynd: Oh, you are? I like this poker thing. And that makes perfect sense! Since MI6 looks for maladjusted young men, who give little thought to sacrificing others in order to protect Queen and country. You know... former SAS types with easy smiles and expensive watches.
[Glances at his wrist]
Vesper Lynd: Rolex?
James Bond: Omega.
Vesper Lynd: Beautiful. Now, having just met you, I - wouldn't go as far as calling you a cold-hearted bastard...
James Bond: No, of course not.
Vesper Lynd: But it wouldn't be a stretch to imagine. You think of women as disposable pleasures, rather than meaningful pursuits. So as charming as you are, Mr. Bond, I will be keeping my eye on our government's money - and off your perfectly-formed arse.
James Bond: You noticed?
Vesper Lynd: Even accountants have imagination. How was your lamb?
James Bond: Skewered! One sympathizes.
Vesper Lynd: Good evening, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: Good evening, Ms. Lynd.
James Bond: [after Bond has just lost his 10 million in the game, to the bartender in the casino] Vodka-martini.
Bartender: Shaken or stirred?
James Bond: [agitated] Do I look like I give a damn?
James Bond: [to Vesper] Why is it that people who can't take advice always insist on giving it?
James Bond: [sarcastically to Le Chiffre and, after nearly dying from poisoning] I'm sorry. That last hand... nearly killed me.
James Bond: [to the bar tender in the casino] Dry Martini.
Bartender: Oui, monsieur.
James Bond: Wait... three measures of Gordon's; one of vodka; half a measure of Kina Lillet. Shake it over ice, and add a thin slice of lemon peel.
Bartender: Yes, sir.
Tomelli: You know, I'll have one of those.
Infante: So will I.
Felix Leiter: My friend, bring me one as well, keep the fruit.
Le Chiffre: [annoyed] That's it? Hm? Anyone want to play poker now?
Felix Leiter: Someone's in a hurry.
James Bond: [Reading about their alias covers] We've been involved for quite a long while. Hence, the shared suite.
Vesper Lynd: But, my family is strict Roman Catholic. So, for appearances sake, it'll be a two bedroom suite.
James Bond: I do *hate* it when religion comes between us.
Vesper Lynd: Religion - and a securely locked door. Am I going to have a problem with you, Bond?
James Bond: No, don't worry, you're not my type.
Vesper Lynd: Smart?
James Bond: Single.
James Bond: [jokingly to Le Chiffre, tied to a wooden chair, inside a metal chamber] I've got a little itch, down there. Would you mind?
James Bond: [laughing - after being stuck five times with a knotted rope inside a steel chamber] Now the whole world's gonna know that you died scratching my balls!
Le Chiffre: [holding the rope over one shoulder] Oh... I died? I died?
James Bond: [laughing] Yeah! 'Cause no matter what you do, I'm not gonna give you the password which means your clients are gonna hunt you down and cut you into little pieces of meat while you're still breathing. Because if you kill me, there'll be nowhere else to hide.
Le Chiffre: [rounds on Bond] But you are SO WRONG! 'Cause even after I slaughtered you and your little girlfriend, your people would still welcome me with open arms... because they need... what I know.
James Bond: [quietly] The big picture.
[in another room, Vesper screams. Bond and Le Chiffre notice this]
Le Chiffre: Give me the password, and I will at least let her live.
[slaps Bond on the cheek again]
Le Chiffre: Bond, do it soon enough and she might even be in one piece.
[Bond considers this, then looks at Le Chiffre and laughs. Le Chiffre laughs as well, and realizes that Bond will not give in to the torture]
Le Chiffre: You *really* aren't going to tell me, are you?
James Bond: [laughing] No.
Vesper Lynd: You love me?
James Bond: Enough to travel the world with you until one of us has to take an honest job... which I think is going to have to be you, because I have no idea what an honest job is.
Vesper Lynd: You can switch off so easily, can't you? It doesn't bother you? Killing those people?
James Bond: Well I wouldn't be very good at my job if it did.
James Bond: [after tasting the Dry Martini] I think I'll call it a Vesper.
Vesper Lynd: Because of the bitter aftertaste?
James Bond: No, because once you've tasted it, that's all you want to drink.
Le Chiffre: [having coming back to the poker table] You changed your shirt, Mr Bond. I hope our little game isn't causing you to perspire.
James Bond: A little. But I won't consider myself to be in trouble until I start weeping blood.
James Bond: [angrily to M] The job's done and the bitch is dead.
Vesper Lynd: You're not going to let me in there, are you? You've got your armour back on. That's that.
James Bond: I have no armour left. You've stripped it from me. Whatever is left of me - whatever is left of me - whatever I am - I'm yours.
M: You don't trust anyone, do you?
James Bond: No.
M: Then you've learned your lesson.
Vesper Lynd: [introducing herself to Bond on the train traveling towards Montenegro ] I'm the money.
James Bond: Every penny of it.
James Bond: The name's Bond... James Bond.
James Bond: [after reading a note left by M and seeing the Aston Martin] I love you too M.
Vesper Lynd: I can't resist waking you. Every time I do you look at me as if you hadn't seen me in years. Makes me feel reborn.
James Bond: If you had just been born wouldn't you be naked?
James Bond: I always thought M was a randomly assigned initial, I had no idea it stood for...
M: Utter one more syllable and I'll have you killed.
James Bond: I'm sorry I'm not sorry.
Gettler: I'll kill her!
James Bond: Allow me.
Felix Leiter: [standing on the stairway in the casino] I should have introduced myself, seeing as we're related. Felix Leiter, a brother from Langley.
[sees that Bond has a knife]
Felix Leiter: You should have faith. As long as you keep your head about you, I think you have him.
James Bond: Had. Excuse me.
Felix Leiter: You're not buying in?
James Bond: No.
Felix Leiter: Listen, I'm bleeding chips. I'm not going to last much longer. You have a better chance. I'll stake you. I'm saying I'll give you the money to keep going. Just one thing: you pull it off, the CIA bring him in.
James Bond: What about the winnings?
Felix Leiter: Does it look like we need the money?
Doctor #1: [to Bond, who is going into cardiac arrest with M listening] Stay calm and don't interrupt. Because you'll be dead within two minutes unless you do exactly what I tell you.
James Bond: [breathing slowly, siting in his Aston Martin] I'm all ears.
M: [standing in front of him in her apartment] I knew it was too early to promote you.
James Bond: [sitting down in front of her computer] Well, I understand 00s have a very short life expectancy... so your mistake will be short-lived.
M: [as Solange's dead body is carried away] I would ask you if you could remain emotionally detached, but that's not your problem, is it, Bond?
James Bond: No.
James Bond: [Bond has just won Dimitrios's car in a game of poker] Oh, and the valet ticket.
James Bond: [stepping out of the bathroom showing her his dinner jacket] I have a dinner jacket.
Vesper Lynd: There are dinner jackets and dinner jackets; this is the latter. And I need you looking like a man who belongs at that table.
James Bond: [irritated] How?... It's tailored.
Vesper Lynd: I sized you up the moment we met.
Vesper Lynd: I'm afraid I'm a complicated woman.
James Bond: That is something to be afraid of.
Solange: [Kissing on the floor of his beachfront suite] Mmmmm. You like married women... don't you, James?
James Bond: It keeps things simple.
Solange: [laughs] What is it about bad men? You... my husband. I had so many chances to be happy, so many nice guys. Why can't nice guys be more like you?
James Bond: Because then they'd be bad.
Solange: [kissing him some more] Mmmmm, yes...! But, so much more interesting.
Dryden: [pointing a gun at Bond] Shame, we barely got to know each other.
[Pulls the trigger, and the gun doesn't fire]
James Bond: [holding up the magazine he'd presumably removed from Dryden's gun] I know where you keep your gun. 'Suppose that's something.
James Bond: [as Solange is kissing her way down Bond's chest] Can I ask you a personal question?
Solange: Now wouldn't seem an appropriate time.
[about Le Chiffre]
James Bond: Do you want a clean kill or do you want to send a message?
[Dryden, an MOD director, comes into his office late at night. After sitting at his desk, he finds James Bond sitting in the shadows]
James Bond: M doesn't mind you earning a little money on the side, Dryden. She'd just prefer it if it wasn't selling secrets.
Dryden: If the theatrics are supposed to scare me, you have the wrong man, Bond. If M was so sure that I was bent, she'd have sent a 00. Benefits of being section chief, I'd know if anyone had been promoted to 00 status, wouldn't I? Your file shows no kills, and it takes...
James Bond: Two.
Dryden: [pulls a gun and points it at Bond] Shame... we barely got to know each other.
[pulls the trigger, but nothing happens]
James Bond: [holds up the clip from Dryden's pistol] I know where you keep your gun. I suppose that's something.
Dryden: [lowers his gun] True. How did he die?
James Bond: Your contact? Not well.
[cut to a scene of Bond savagely beating a man to death in a bathroom]
Dryden: Made you feel it, did he? Well, you needn't worry. The second is...
[Bond pulls his gun and kills Dryden]
James Bond: Yes... considerably
Vesper Lynd: [smiling] You know, James, I just want you to know that if all that was left of you was your smile and your little finger, you'd still be more of a man than anyone I've ever met.
James Bond: [sitting in a wheelchair next to her, outside a clinic] That's because you know what I can do with my little finger.
Vesper Lynd: [Smiles] I have no idea.
James Bond: But, you're aching to find out.
James Bond: [to Carter through an ear piece radio] Stop touching your ear.
Carter: [nervously, can't understand Bond's transmission] Sorry?
James Bond: [raising his voice] Put your hand down!
James Bond: [Vesper Lynd presents her business card] Vesper? I do hope you gave your parents hell for that.
Mr. White: Hello?
James Bond: Mr. White? We need to talk.
Mr. White: Who is this?
[a shot rings out. White's leg is shattered. He drops to the ground in obvious pain and drags himself toward the house. He is stopped at the steps by the feet of a man in a suit. He looks up to see Bond with a cell phone in one hand and an assault weapon in the other]
James Bond: The name's Bond. James Bond.
James Bond: [upon receiving their alias documents] I'm Mr. Arlington Beech, professional gambler, and you're Miss Stephanie Broadchest...
Vesper Lynd: I am not!
James Bond: You're going to have to trust me on this.
Vesper Lynd: Oh no I don't.
[Bond, having been poisoned, is attempting to use a defibrillator on himself while a doctor talks him through the process over the phone, but the defibrillator has come disconnected. Bond passes out and his heart stops. Vesper arrives, reconnects the defibrillator, and uses it to restart Bond's heart. He regains consciousness]
James Bond: [having woken up] You OK?
Vesper Lynd: [confused] Me?
James Bond: Thank you.
Hot Room Doctor: You're welcome. Now get yourself off to a hospital.
James Bond: I will do. As soon as I've won this game.
Vesper Lynd: You're not seriously going back there?
James Bond: I wouldn't dream of it.
M: [sees Bond sitting by her computer in her apartment] You've got a bloody cheek!
James Bond: Sorry. I'll shoot the camera first next time.
M: Or yourself. You stormed into an Embassy. You violated the only absolutely inviolate rule of international relations, and why? So you could kill a nobody. We wanted to question him, not to kill him! For God's sake! You're supposed to display some kind of judgement.
James Bond: I did. I thought one less bomb maker in the world would be a good thing.
M: Exactly. One bomb maker. We're trying to figure out how an entire network of terrorist groups is financed and you give us one bomb maker. Hardly the big picture, wouldn't you say?
Carter: [sees Mollaka in the crowd, watching animals fight] Looks like our man, burn scars on his face.
James Bond: Hmm. I wonder if bomb-makers are insured for things like that.
James Bond: [talking privately to Vesper after losing all of his chips] Well, I'm gonna need the other five million to buy back in.
Vesper Lynd: I can't do that, James.
James Bond: Look, I made a mistake. I was impatient, maybe I was arrogant, but I can beat him.
Vesper Lynd: [quietly] I'm sorry.
James Bond: [angrily grabs Vesper's arm] "Sorry?" Sorry! Why don't you try putting that in a sentence, like maybe, "Sorry Le Chiffre's gonna win, continue funding terror and killing innocent people!" That kind of "sorry"?
Vesper Lynd: You lost because of your ego, and that same ego can't take it! That's what this is all about. All you're going to do now is lose more.
James Bond: [mumbling] Well then, you're an idiot.
Vesper Lynd: I'm sorry?
James Bond: I said you're a bloody idiot! Look in my eyes. I can beat this man - you know that.
Vesper Lynd: [quietly] Get your hand off my arm.
James Bond: [during briefing in the Bahamas] So you want me to be half-monk, half-hitman.
M: Any thug can kill. I need you to take your ego out of the equation.
James Bond: What makes your husband a bad man?
Solange: His nature, I suppose.
James Bond: The nature of his work?
Solange: The mystery, I'm afraid. I'm also afraid you will sleep with me in order to get to him.
James Bond: How afraid?
Solange: Oh, not enough to stop.
Solange: Apparently, he's on the last flight to Miami. So, you have all night to question me.
James Bond: In that case, we're gonna need - some more champagne.
James Bond: [over the phone with room service] Good evening. Can I get a bottle of chilled Bollinger Grande AnnÃ©e and the Beluga caviar?
Dryden: Benefits of being section chief. I'd know if anyone had been promoted to 00 status, wouldn't I? Your file shows no kills, and it takes...
James Bond: Two.
[cuts to Bond fighting Dryden's contact]
James Bond: [talking privately at the bar to Mathis and Vesper referring to Le Chiffre] It was worth it to discover his "tell".
Mathis: What'd you mean "tell"?
James Bond: The twitch he has to hide when he bluffs.
Vesper Lynd: Bluffs? He had the best hand.
James Bond: You want to do what to me?
Vesper Lynd: [Under her breath] You've lost me, completely.
James Bond: [Under his breath] You said you can't wait to get me back to the room, come on.
James Bond: [Explaining to Mathis and Vesper why he deliberately lost a hand to Le Chiffre] He won the hand with the river card: the odds against are twenty three to one and he'd know that, when he made his first raise he had nothing, winning was blind luck.
James Bond: Could you do me a favor? I was here for dinner last night and I parked my car next to a very beautiful 1964 Aston Martin - and I'm ashamed to say I nicked the door. You wouldn't happen to know...
Ocean Club Receptionist: Mr. Dimitrios.
James Bond: Right.
Ocean Club Receptionist: If he hasn't noticed, I'm not sure I'd mention it. He isn't the type to take bad news well.
James Bond: Can I give you a lift home?
Solange: [Referring to her husband, Alex Dimitrios] That would really send him over the edge. I'm afraid I'm not that corrupt.
James Bond: Well, perhaps you're just out of practice.
James Bond: What about a drink at my place?
Solange: Your place? Is it close?
James Bond: Very.
Solange: One drink.
M: She was tortured first. As you'd already killed her husband, she must have been the only one left to question. Did she know anything that could compromise you?
James Bond: No.
M: Not your name? What you were after?
James Bond: No.
James Bond: You can stop pretending. You knew I wouldn't let this drop, didn't you?
M: Well, I knew you were you.
Vesper Lynd: So you're telling me its a matter of probability and chance. I was worried there wasn't chance involved.
James Bond: Well, usually the player with the best hand wins.
Vesper Lynd: So, that would be what you call bluffing.
James Bond: You've heard the term. Then you also know in poker you never play your hand. You play the man across from you.
Vesper Lynd: And you're good at reading people?
James Bond: Yes, I am. Which is why I've been able to detect an undercurrent of sarcasm in your voice.
James Bond: You don't think this is a very good plan, do you?
Vesper Lynd: So there is a plan? I got the impression we were risking millions of dollars and hundreds of lives on a game of luck.
James Bond: [after checking in the hotel using his real name as opposed to his alias, walking towards to elevator] Look, if Le Chiffre is that well connected, he knows who I am and where the money's coming from. Which means he's decided to play me anyway. So, he's either desperate or he's overly confident. But, either way, that tells me something about him. And all he gets in return is a name he already has.
Vesper Lynd: And now he knows something about you. He knows you're reckless.
James Bond: [Bond walks up and kisses Vesper] You taste nice.
Vesper Lynd: Have we dispensed with the covers?
James Bond: No. We dispensed with one that was of no use and created another that is.
James Bond: [Referring to Vesper's necklace] I figured out what that is. It's an Algerian love knot.
Vesper Lynd: Really? I thought it was just something pretty.
James Bond: Oh, no you didn't. Someone gave that to you. He's a very lucky man.
Vesper Lynd: You think I can't take my own advice?
James Bond: I think something is driving you - and I think I'll never find out what that is.
Vesper Lynd: You can have me - anywhere.
James Bond: I can?
Vesper Lynd: Yeah. Here. There. Anyway you like.
James Bond: Does this mean that your - warming to me?
Vesper Lynd: Yeah. That's how I would describe it.
James Bond: Its just that not so long ago I would have described your feelings towards me as, eh, I'm trying to think of a better word than - loathing.
Vesper Lynd: I'm afraid I'm a complicated woman.
James Bond: There is something to be afraid of.
Oberhauser: Why did you come?
James Bond: I came here to kill you.
Oberhauser: And I thought you came here to die.
James Bond: Well, it's all a matter of perspective.
Lucia Sciarra: If you don't leave now, we'll die together.
James Bond: I can think of worse ways to go.
Lucia Sciarra: Then you're obviously crazy, Mr...
James Bond: Bond. James Bond.
Madeleine Swann: Why, given every other possible option, does a man choose the life of a paid assassin?
James Bond: Well, it was that or the priesthood.
James Bond: [Q hands Bond a watch] What does it do?
Q: It tells the time. Might help with your punctuality issues.
James Bond: M's idea?
Q: Precisely. Oh, one word of warning, the alarm is rather loud... if you know what I mean.
James Bond: I think I do.
James Bond: I was in a meeting recently, and your name came up.
Mr. White: I'm flattered London is still talking about me.
James Bond: It wasn't MI6... it was Rome.
[reveals a Spectre ring]
Madeleine Swann: You shouldn't stare.
James Bond: Well, you shouldn't look like that.
[at the clinic bar]
Clinic Barman: Can I get you something, sir?
James Bond: Vodka martini. Shaken, not stirred.
Clinic Barman: I'm sorry, we don't serve alcohol.
James Bond: I'm already starting to love this place...
Madeleine Swann: Is this really what you want? Living in the shadows? Hunting, being hunted? Always alone?
James Bond: I don't stop to think about it.
Oberhauser: Do you know what it is?
Madeleine Swann: It's a meteorite.
Oberhauser: Yes, exactly. The Kartenhoff, the oldest in human possession. The very meteorite which made this crater. Think about it: so many years up there, alone, silent, building momentum until it chose to make its mark on Earth. A huge unstoppable force.
James Bond: Except it did stop, didn't it? Right here.
Oberhauser: You came across me so many times and yet you never saw me. Le Chiffre, Greene, Silva...
James Bond: All dead.
Oberhauser: That's right. A nice pattern developed. You interfered in my world, I destroyed yours. Or did you think it was coincidence that all the women in your life ended up dead?
[of an approaching car]
Madeleine Swann: What's that?
James Bond: That is a 1948 Rolls Royce Silver Wraith.
Eve Moneypenny: So what's going on, James? They say that Mexico was a step too far, that you're finished.
James Bond: And what do you think?
Eve Moneypenny: I think you're just getting started.
James Bond: Could you do one more thing for me?
Q: And that would be?
James Bond: Make me disappear.
James Bond: You're a hard man to kill, Blofeld.
[notices his scar]
James Bond: Ouch. I do hope that doesn't hurt too much.
Blofeld: My wounds will heal. What about yours?
Lucia Sciarra: Did you kill my husband?
James Bond: He was an assassin. He wouldn't have taken it personally.
James Bond: Where is he?
Mr. White: He is everywhere. He's everywhere! He's at a bar with your friends, he's having dinner with your kids, he's in bed with your lover!
Q: I thought you were done.
James Bond: I am. I just need one more thing.
James Bond: [over the phone] Who was that?
Eve Moneypenny: He's just a friend.
James Bond: At this hour of the night?
Eve Moneypenny: It's called life, James. You should try it some time.
Madeleine Swann: [given a gun] What if I shoot you by mistake?
James Bond: It wouldn't be the first time.
Madeleine Swann: I can't go back to this life. And I'm not going to ask you to change, you are who you are.
James Bond: You're saying goodbye.
James Bond: [on the previous M] She wouldn't let death get in the way of her job.
[Bond points a gun at Blofeld]
Blofeld: Finish it... Finish it!
James Bond: [removes clip from gun] Out of bullets.
[looks over at Madeleine]
James Bond: And besides, I've got something better to do.
James Bond: Tempus Fugit... isn't it funny how time flies?
[his watch explodes]
Q: May I remind you that I answer directly to M. I also have a mortgage and two cats to feed.
James Bond: Well, then I suggest you trust me, for the sake of the cats.
Madeleine Swann: I love you...
Oberhauser: Do those blue eyes still recognize you?
James Bond: I'd recognize you anywhere.
Clinic Barman: Here you are, sir. One prolytic digestive enzyme shake.
James Bond: Do me a favor, will you? Throw that down the toilet. Cut out the middleman.
Blofeld: [about C] He's a visionary, like me.
James Bond: Visionaries... Psychiatric wards are full of them.
Q: Well it's lovely to see you, 007. Lovely. Um, now I meant to tell you, the Smart Blood program is obviously still in its developmental phase. So we may experience the odd drop in coverage during the first 24 hours...
[Bond glares at him]
Q: 48 hours after administration, but after that it should work perfectly.
James Bond: I'll send you a postcard.
Q: Please don't.
Madeleine Swann: [referring to the windows] I hope you don't mind, the view can be distracting.
James Bond: [smiling at her] I hadn't noticed.
Madeleine Swann: Do you exercise?
James Bond: When I have to.
Madeleine Swann: Do you consider your employment to be psychologically stressful?
James Bond: Sometimes.
Madeleine Swann: How much alcohol do you consume?
James Bond: Too much.
Madeleine Swann: I see you left this final question blank. What is your occupation.
James Bond: Well, that's not the sort of thing that looks good on a form.
Madeleine Swann: And why is that?
James Bond: I kill people.
Oberhauser: [Bond is strapped to a torture chair with a drill attached] So James, I'm going to penetrate to where you are. To the inside of your head. Now the first probe will play with your sight, your hearing, and your balance, just with the subtlest of manipulations.
James Bond: Well, get on with it then. Nothing can be as painful as listening to you talk.
Oberhauser: All right, let's begin.
[activates the machine]
James Bond: [pointing his gun at a mouse] Who sent you? Who are you working for?
[the mouse looks blankly at him and scurries off]
Estrella: Where are you going?
James Bond: I won't be long.
C: [enters M's office] So sorry, am I interrupting?
M: Not remotely. 007, I'd like you to meet Max Denbigh, head of the Joint Security Service.
C: Well it's a pleasure to finally meet you, 007. I've heard a lot about you. Most of it good.
James Bond: [offers hand] Congratulations on your new appointment.
C: [shakes Bond's hand] Thank you.
James Bond: I suppose we should call you "C" now.
C: No, no. "Max," please.
James Bond: No, I think I'll call you "C"... C.
C: As you wish. Well my door is always open, 007, for my employees. This merger's gonna be a whole new chapter for us. We're going to bring British intelligence out of the dark ages... into the light.
James Bond: That all sounds lovely.
James Bond: [whispers to Madeleine] One minute. One minute.
Blofeld: Did he say something?
James Bond: Tempus fugit.
James Bond: Tempus fugit.
Blofeld: I can't hear you, James.
James Bond: I said, doesn't time fly?
[Madeleine tosses the watch to Blofeld and it explodes, destroying the torture machine and knocking Blofeld unconscious]
James Bond: [after shooting at a bulletproof glass which form the SPECTRE logo] You're a hard man to kill, Blofeld.
[looks at Blofeld's scar]
James Bond: Ouch. I do hope that doesn't hurt too much.
Blofeld: My wounds will heal. What about yours? Look around you, James, look. This is what's left of your world. Everything you've ever stood for, everything you believed in, a ruin.
James Bond: Why are we here? Did you miss me?
[blows into the glass]
Blofeld: But I know someone who does.
[makes a heart sign out of the air]
James Bond: [referring to Madeleine] Where is she?
Blofeld: That's for you to find out.
[activates a time bomb on the wall]
Blofeld: In 3 minutes, this building will be demolished. Well, I can get out easily. Now, you have a choice. Die trying to save her or save yourself and live with the pain.
James Bond: You're bluffing.
Blofeld: Am I?
[after a brief pause, Blofeld chuckles]
Blofeld: I've really put you through it, haven't I? Well, that's brothers for you. They always know which buttons to press.
[starts the time bomb then flees, Bond runs off]
James Bond: [Oberhauser shows Madeleine footage of Mr. White committing suicide] No, no, no. Turn it off. Turn it off.
Oberhauser: This is important.
James Bond: I said turn it off!
[a SPECTRE member hits Bond in the leg]
James Bond: They say you're judged by the strength of your enemies.
James Bond: [Bond is holding Yusef and Corinne at gunpoint] Sit down!
[they both sit]
James Bond: [looking at Corinne] You're Canadian...? You work in Canadian intelligence?
[Corinne doesn't answer]
James Bond: That's all right... I know you do. And knowing this man, you likely have access to some very sensitive material that you're going to be forced to give up. His life will be threatened... and because you love him, you won't hesitate.
[pause; Bond looks at Corinne's necklace]
James Bond: That's a beautiful necklace. Did he give it to you?
[Corinne still doesn't answer]
James Bond: [showing her Vesper's necklace] I have one just like it. He gave it to a friend of mine... someone very close to me. Your name is...?
James Bond: Corinne... Corinne, I suggest you leave now. You contact your people, and you tell them to check their seals. They have a leak. Do it now, please. This man and I have some unfinished business.
Corinne: [softly, as she leaves] Thank you.
[Bond turns back to Yusef]
Yusef: Please. Make it quick.
James Bond: [Interrupting the opera house conversation] Can I offer an opinion? I really think you people should find a better place to meet.
James Bond: [at a dirty, small motel] What are we doing?
Strawberry Fields: We're teachers on sabbatical. This fits our cover.
James Bond: No it doesn't. I'd rather stay at a morgue. Come on.
[they go to a nicer hotel]
James Bond: [to the hotel receptionist] Hello. We're teachers on sabbatical and we've just won the lottery.
M: Ask him about Slate.
Tanner: She wants to know about Slate.
James Bond: Slate was a dead end.
Tanner: He says it was a dead end.
M: Damn it! He killed him.
M: If you could avoid killing every possible lead, it would be deeply appreciated.
James Bond: I'll do my best.
M: I've heard that before.
M: You killed a man in Bregenz.
James Bond: I did my best not to.
M: You shot him at point blank and threw him off a roof. I would hardly call that showing restraint!
M: The Americans are gonna be none too pleased.
James Bond: I promised them Le Chiffre and they got him.
M: They got his body.
James Bond: Well, if they wanted his soul, they should have made a deal with a priest.
Camille: [notices they are being followed] Friend of yours?
James Bond: I don't have any friends.
M: This is about trust. You said you weren't motivated by revenge.
James Bond: I am motivated by my duty.
M: No... I think you're so blinded by inconsolable rage that you don't care who you hurt. When you can't tell your friends from your enemies, it's time to go.
Mathis: You can't sleep?
Bartender on Virgin Flight: May I fix you a drink, Sir?
Mathis: What are you drinking?
James Bond: I don't know. What am I drinking?
Bartender on Virgin Flight: Three measures of Gordon's Gin, One of Vodka, Half a measure of Kina...
Mathis: Kina Lillet.
Bartender on Virgin Flight: Kina Lillet, which is not Vermouth. Shaken well until it is ice cold and served with a large, thin slice of lemon peel. Six of them.
Mathis: That's impressive.
James Bond: They're good. You should have one.
Camille: You lost somebody?
James Bond: I did.
Camille: You catch who ever did it?
James Bond: No, not yet.
Camille: Tell me when you do, I'd like to know how it feels...
Strawberry Fields: Mr. Bond, my name is Fields. I'm from the consulate.
James Bond: Of course you are. And what do you do at the consulate Fields?
Strawberry Fields: That's not important. My orders are to turn you around and put you on the first plane to London.
James Bond: [Walking past her] Do those orders include my friend Mathis?
Strawberry Fields: [to Mathis] I'm sorry, I don't know who you are.
James Bond: [to Mathis] You see? You've been gone for such a short time and you're already forgotten.
Mathis: You're just saying that to hurt me.
Strawberry Fields: [Following Bond out] Mr. Bond, these orders come from the highest possible authority.
James Bond: Taxi! Fields, when is the next flight to London?
Strawberry Fields: Tomorrow morning.
James Bond: Well then, we have all night.
Strawberry Fields: If you attempt to flee I will arrest you, drop you off at the jail and take you to the plane in chains, understand?
James Bond: [Opening the taxi door] Perfectly. After you.
Mathis: I think she has handcuffs.
James Bond: I hope so.
Camille: So, what's your interest in Greene?
James Bond: Among other things, he tried to kill a friend of mine.
Camille: A woman?
James Bond: Yes. But it's not what you think.
Camille: Your mother?
James Bond: She likes to think so.
James Bond: You know I was just wondering what South America would look like if nobody gave a damn about coke or communism. It always impressed me the way you boys would carve this place up.
Felix Leiter: I'll take that as a compliment coming from a Brit.
[Bond shows up for his rendezvous with Camille having just survived a knife-fight]
Camille: You're late!
James Bond: Got pulled into a meeting.
James Bond: [chucks a can of motor oil at Greene's feet] I bet you make it 20 miles before you consider drinking that.
[Bond gets in the car and drives away, leaving Greene stranded in the middle of the desert]
James Bond: Goodbye, Mr. Greene.
Camille: How much did he want?
James Bond: He wanted you but I left the car as collateral. He'll get much more when he sells us out.
James Bond: How long have I got?
Felix Leiter: Thirty seconds.
James Bond: That doesn't give us a lot of time...
Dominic Greene: My friends call me Dominic.
James Bond: I'm sure they do.
James Bond: I don't think the dead care about vengeance.
M: Bond, I need you back.
James Bond: I never left.
James Bond: Are you going to tell us who you work for?
Mr. White: I was always very interested to meet you. I heard so much about you from Vesper. The real shame is, if she hadn't killed herself we would've had you too.
James Bond: [to Camille] Take a deep breath, you only got one shot, make it count.
[drags Mr. White onto an interrogation chair]
James Bond: Don't bleed to death.
James Bond: My sources tell me you're Bolivian Secret Service. Or, used to be. I thought you'd infiltrated Greene's organization by having sex with him.
Camille: That offends you?
James Bond: No. Not the slightest.
James Bond: [First line] Its time to get out.
Camille: We didn't settle on a price.
James Bond: Make me an offer.
Camille: We can work it out later.
M: What happened to Slate?
James Bond: I'm not dwelling on the past. I don't think you should either.
M: You killed him.
M: [On the phone] Bond, are you missing the fact that you killed a member of the Special Branch. I need you to come in.
James Bond: And I would, but, right now I need to find the man who tried to kill you. Go back to sleep.
James Bond: I need some information.
[Gives Mathis a stack of photographs]
Mathis: Oh, you have some hard friends. This man is some kind of facilitator. Fingers in many pies and they don't leave any prints.
Strawberry Fields: [Sitting naked in bed] Do you know how angry I am at myself?
James Bond: I can't imagine.
[Kisses her back]
James Bond: You must be furious.
Camille: So, its British Intelligence now. What the hell do you want from me?
James Bond: You're going to show me Dominic Greene's Tierra Project. Are you up to it?
Camille: Do I have a choice?
James Bond: Do you want one?
Camille: Get in.
James Bond: Are going to try and shoot me?
Camille: I said, get in.
M: I assume you have no regrets.
James Bond: I don't! What about you?
M: Of course not. It would be unprofessional.
James Bond: Now, you and I need to see this through.
M: There's no where to go. There's a capture or kill order out on you.
James Bond: Who would have done that?
Q: It always makes me feel a bit melancholy. Grand old war ship. being ignominiously haunted away to scrap... The inevitability of time, don't you think? What do you see?
James Bond: A bloody big ship. Excuse me.
Q: 007. I'm your new Quartermaster.
James Bond: You must be joking.
Q: Why, because I'm not wearing a lab coat?
James Bond: Because you still have spots.
Q: My complexion is hardly relevant.
James Bond: Your competence is.
Q: Age is no guarantee of efficiency.
James Bond: And youth is no guarantee of innovation.
Q: Well, I'll hazard I can do more damage on my laptop sitting in my pajamas before my first cup of Earl Grey than you can do in a year in the field.
James Bond: Oh, so why do you need me?
Q: Every now and then a trigger has to be pulled.
James Bond: Or not pulled. It's hard to know which in your pajamas. Q.
[Bond stares at the porcelain bulldog statue on M's desk]
James Bond: The whole office goes up in smoke and that bloody thing survives.
M: Your interior decorating tips have always been appreciated, 007.
Doctor Hall: [Bond enters the interrogation room to take his psychological test, looking toward the one way mirror. M and Mallory stand on the other side with Tanner] I'd like to start with some simple word associations. Just tell me the first word that pops into your head. For example, I say, "Day" and you might say...
James Bond: Wasted.
Doctor Hall: [sighs] All right.
Doctor Hall: Gun.
James Bond: Shot.
Doctor Hall: Agent.
James Bond: Provocateur.
Doctor Hall: Woman?
James Bond: Provocatrix.
Doctor Hall: Heart.
James Bond: Target.
Doctor Hall: Bird.
James Bond: Sky.
Doctor Hall: M.
James Bond: Bitch.
[M sighs from the other side of the interrogation room]
Doctor Hall: Sunlight
James Bond: Swim
Doctor Hall: Moon
James Bond: Dance
Doctor Hall: Murder.
James Bond: Employment.
Doctor Hall: Country.
James Bond: England.
Doctor Hall: Skyfall.
[Bond suddenly pauses]
Doctor Hall: Skyfall.
Doctor Hall: Done.
[Bond walks out - looking coldly through the one-way mirror]
Gareth Mallory: Hmm, this is going well
[he leaves, M sighs again]
James Bond: So this is it. We're both played out.
M: Well, if you believe that, why did you come back?
James Bond: Good question.
M: Because we're under attack. And you know we need you.
James Bond: Well, I'm here.
M: You'll have to be debriefed and declared fit for active service. You can only return to duty when you've passed the tests, so take them seriously. And a shower might be in order.
James Bond: I'll go home and change.
M: Oh, we've sold your flat, put your things into storage. Standard procedure on the death of an unmarried employee with no next of kin. You should have called.
James Bond: I'll find a hotel.
M: Well, you're bloody well not sleeping here.
[Bond is chasing Silva who escaped, trying to open a door]
James Bond: It won't open.
Q: Of course it will, put your back into it.
James Bond: Why don't you come down here and put your back into it?
Raoul Silva: If you wanted, you could pick your own secret missions. As I do. Name it, name it. Destabilize a multinational by manipulating stocks. Bip. Easy. Interrupt transmissions from a spy satellite over Kabul... done. Hmm. Rig an election in Uganda. All to the highest bidder.
James Bond: Or a gas explosion in London.
Raoul Silva: Mm-hm. Just point and click.
James Bond: Well, everybody needs a hobby.
Raoul Silva: So what's yours?
James Bond: Resurrection.
M: Is this where you grew up?
James Bond: Mm.
M: How old were you when they died?
James Bond: You know the answer to that. You know the whole story.
M: Orphans always make the best recruits.
James Bond: A gun and a radio. It's not exactly Christmas, is it?
Q: Were you expecting an exploding pen? We don't really go in for that anymore.
M: I fucked this up, didn't I?
James Bond: No. You did your job.
James Bond: I read your obituary of me.
James Bond: Appalling.
M: Yeah, I knew you'd hate it. I did call you "an exemplar of British fortitude".
James Bond: That bit was all right.
Q: I'm guessing this is not official.
James Bond: Not even remotely.
Q: So much for my promising career in espionage.
James Bond: [as his boyhood home burns down] I always hated this place.
Q: There are only about six people in the world who could set up fail-safes like this.
James Bond: Can you get past them?
Q: I invented them.
James Bond: Some men are coming to kill us. We're going to kill them first.
[Bond opens a garage door to reveal his Aston Martin DB5]
M: Oh, and I suppose that's completely inconspicuous.
James Bond: Get in.
Eve: [watches Bond shave] Cut-throat razor. How very traditional.
James Bond: Well, I like to do some things the old-fashioned way.
Eve: Sometimes the old ways are the best.
[Bond runs and jumps on the end of the train, hanging on the door as the female conductor looks at him in confusion]
James Bond: Open the door, please!
[Conductor still stares at him]
James Bond: Open the door!
[Conductor finally opens the door before Bond walks in]
James Bond: Health and Safety. Carry on.
James Bond: [a mirror on Land Rover's right door falls] That's all right. You weren't using it.
Eve: [makes left mirror fall] I wasn't using that one, either.
Q: Good luck out there in the field... And please return the equipment in one piece.
James Bond: A brave new world.
Raoul Silva: [Silva unbuttons Bond's shirt and peels back the shirt to expose the scar tissue where Bond removed the bullet] Ooh! See what she's done to you.
James Bond: [suspicious] Well, she never tied me to a chair.
Raoul Silva: Her loss.
[Silva begins caressing Bond's neck]
James Bond: Are you sure this is about M?
Raoul Silva: It's about her... and you, and me. You see, we are the last two rats. We can either eat each other... mmm... or eat everyone else.
[Silva strokes Bond's neck]
Raoul Silva: How you're trying to remember your training now.
Raoul Silva: What's the regulation to cover this?
[Silva strokes both of Bond's upper legs]
Raoul Silva: Well, first time for everything.
Raoul Silva: Yes?
James Bond: What makes you think this is my first time?
Raoul Silva: [sits back] Oh, Mr Bond. All the physical stuff - so dull, so dull.
Gareth Mallory: So, 007... Lots to be done. Are you ready to get back to work?
James Bond: With pleasure, M. With pleasure.
James Bond: Oh good, here comes a train.
[Bond is gifted the porcelain bulldog]
Eve: I think she was encouraging you to take a desk job.
James Bond: Just the opposite.
James Bond: Not enough excitement in Istanbul?
Eve: I've been reassigned. Temporary suspension from field work.
James Bond: Really?
Eve: Mmm. Something to do with killing 007.
James Bond: Well, you gave it your best shot.
Eve: That was hardly my best shot.
James Bond: I'm not sure I could survive your best.
Eve: I doubt you'll get the chance.
[Bond and M drive off in the Aston Martin DB5]
M: It's not very comfortable, is it?
James Bond: [Flips up the shift knob cap to reveal the ejector seat button underneath] Are you gonna complain all the way?
M: Oh, go on, then, eject me. See if I care.
[Bond reconsiders the thought and closes the shift knob while driving]
James Bond: [about getting shot] In your defense, a moving target is harder to hit.
Eve: Then you'd better keep moving.
M: 007, what the hell are you doing? Are you kidnapping me?
James Bond: That would be one way of looking at it.
James Bond: [dodging an explosion] Was that for me?
Raoul Silva: [laughing] No, but that is.
[a subway train crashes after Bond]
Kincade: So who is it we're supposed to be fighting?
James Bond: No "we" in it. Kincade. This is not your fight.
Kincade: Try and stop me, you jumped-up little shit.
James Bond: What was it you said? "Take the bloody shot."
M: I made a judgment call.
James Bond: You should have trusted me to finish the job.
M: It was a possibility of losing you or the certainty of losing all those other agents. I made the only decision I could and you know it.
James Bond: I think you lost your nerve.
M: What are you expecting, a bloody apology? You know the rules of the game. You've been playing it long enough. We both have.
James Bond: Maybe too long.
M: Speak for yourself.
James Bond: [as Silva falls] Last rat standing.
Raoul Silva: Just look at you, barely held together by your pills and your drink.
James Bond: Don't forget my pathetic love of country.
Eve: She's ready for you.
James Bond: I'm sorry, have we met before?
Eve: I'm the one who should say sorry.
James Bond: It was only four ribs. Some of the less vital organs. Nothing major.
Eve: She's pretty.
James Bond: Now, now.
Eve: If you like that sort of thing.
James Bond: I'll keep you posted.
[puts his earpiece into her glass]
James Bond: [as Silva arrives at Skyfall in a helicopter while playing loud music] Always got to make an entrance.
James Bond: The latest thing from Q branch; it's called a radio.
James Bond: What a waste of good scotch.
SÃ©vÃ©rine: Would you mind if I ask you a business question?
James Bond: Depends on the question.
SÃ©vÃ©rine: It has to do with - death.
James Bond: A subject in which you're well-versed.
SÃ©vÃ©rine: And how would you know that?
James Bond: Only a certain kind of woman wears a backless dress with a Beretta 70 strapped to her thigh.
SÃ©vÃ©rine: One can never be too careful when handsome men in tuxedos carry Walthers.
James Bond: [Silva's men are approaching] You ready?
Kincade: I was ready before you were born, son.
M: I suppose... It's too late to make a run for it?
James Bond: Well, I'm game if you are.
M: I did get one thing right.
James Bond: [after a scene with heavy shooting] Are you hurt?
M: Only my pride is hurt.
James Bond: [the fat bodyguard is about to be bitten by a komodo dragon, failed to pull the trigger to James Bond] Good luck with that.
Q: [Via Bond's earpiece] Where are you?
James Bond: [He's on the train] Take a wild guess, Q.
SÃ©vÃ©rine: How much do you know about fear?
James Bond: All there is.
SÃ©vÃ©rine: Not like this. Not like him.
Eve: You know, Mallory's not as bad as you think.
James Bond: He's a bureaucrat.
Eve: You should do your homework. Gareth Mallory was a Lieutenant Colonel...
James Bond: Lieutenant Colonel in Northern Ireland. Hereford Regiment. Spent three months at the hands of the IRA.
Eve: So there's more to him than meets the eye.
M: I suppose it's too late to make a run for it?
James Bond: Well, I'm game if you are.
SÃ©vÃ©rine: Will you... kill him?
James Bond: Someone always dies.
James Bond: [Looking round Skyfall one last time] I always did hate this house.
James Bond: [to SÃ©vÃ©rine when they are in the shower together] I like you better without your Beretta.
SÃ©vÃ©rine: I feel naked without it.
M: This is where you grew up.
James Bond: Mm.
James Bond: A storm's coming.
James Bond: Ronson didn't make it, did he?
James Bond: [fighting Patrice] Who's got the list? Tell me! Who are you working for?
[Patrice slips from Bond's hand and plummets to his death]
James Bond: [gives suitcase of money to Eve] Bet it all on red.
M: 007, Gareth Mallory.
Gareth Mallory: I hope I haven't missed anything. The PM does prattle on in a crisis. Bond.
James Bond: Mallory.
Kincade: James. James Bond.
James Bond: Good God. He's still alive.
Kincade: Hah, it's nice to see you, too.
James Bond: You know, we've never formerly been introduced.
Eve: Oh? Well, my name's Eve. Eve Moneypenny.
James Bond: Well I look forward to our time together, Miss Moneypenny.
Eve: Me too. I'm sure we'll have one or two close shaves.
James Bond: [Speaking on a blue tooth device] Ronson's down. He needs a medical evac.
M: Where is it? Is it there?
James Bond: Hard drives gone.
M: You sure?
James Bond: It's gone. Give me a minute.
M: They must have it! Get after them!
James Bond: I'm stabilizing Ronson.
M: We don't have the time!
James Bond: I have to stop the bleeding!
M: Leave him!
M: You know what's at stake here. We cannot afford to lose that list.
James Bond: Yes, mum.
Gareth Mallory: I only have one question. Why not - stay dead? You have the perfect way out. Go and live, quietly somewhere. Not many field agents get to leave this cleanly.
James Bond: Do you get out in the field much?
Gareth Mallory: You don't need to be an operative to see the obvious. It's a young man's game.
James Bond: Hire me or fire me. It's entirely up to you.
Tanner: We've analyzed the shrapnel fragments. Lucky it wasn't a direct hit - it would have cut you in half. It's depleted uranium shell, military grade. Hard to get. Extremely expensive and only used by a select few. Recognize anyone?
James Bond: [Points to a photograph] Him.
Tanner: Okay. His name's Patrice. He's a ghost. No known residency or country of origin.
M: Find out who he works for and who has the list. Then, terminate him for Ronson.
James Bond: With pleasure.
M: 007, you are ready for this?
James Bond: Yes, Mum.
James Bond: You look beautiful in that dress.
Eve: You don't scrub up so bad yourself.
James Bond: Well, its amazing what one can do with an extra pair of hands.
James Bond: Do you gamble?
Eve: I like a little flutter, now and then. Who doesn't like to take chances?
SÃ©vÃ©rine: Who doesn't appreciate the occasional twists, Mister?
James Bond: Bond. James Bond.
James Bond: You're scared.
SÃ©vÃ©rine: Thank you for the drink - Mr. Bond.
James Bond: You put on a good show. But, ever since we sat down you haven't stopped looking at your body guards. The three of them is a bit excessive. They're controlling you. They're not protecting you. Tattoo on your wrist is Macau sex trade. You belong to one of the houses. What were you 12? 13? I'm guessing he was your way out. Perhaps you thought you were in love. But, that was a long time ago.
SÃ©vÃ©rine: You know nothing about it.
James Bond: I know when a woman is afraid and pretending not to be.
James Bond: Does he always get what he wants?
SÃ©vÃ©rine: More than you know.
Raoul Silva: You're still clinging to your faith in that old woman - when all she does is lie to you.
James Bond: She never lied to me.
Raoul Silva: No?
[M arrives at her home and prepares a drink when she suddenly hears the sound of glass clanging from behind her. She sees a silhouette of Bond near the window]
M: Where the hell have you been?
James Bond: Enjoying death. 007 reporting for duty.
James Bond: Everyone needs a hobby...
Raoul Silva: So what's yours?
James Bond: Resurrection.
James Bond: [a device closes; cocks gun] So you lived to die another day... Colonel.
Graves: At last... I was beginning to think you would never guess.
James Bond: Was it painful? The gene therapy.
Graves: You couldn't possibly imagine.
James Bond: Oh, good. I'm glad to hear that.
Graves: But there have been compensations, like you floating around in peril. Granting you life day by day just to see you get wise. It's been fun.
James Bond: Well, the fun is about to come to a dead end.
Graves: [Spoiler Quote]
[Miranda point her gun at Graves]
Graves: So... Miss Frost is not all she seems.
James Bond: Looks can be deceptive.
Graves: Yes. By the way, did you find out who betrayed you in North Korea?
James Bond: Only a matter of time.
Graves: You never even thought of looking inside your own organization?
[Miranda turns against MI6 by pointing the gun at James]
Graves: She was right under your nose.
Miranda Frost: [James shoots, but his gun is empty] It was so good of you to bring your gun in bed with us.
James Bond: Yes. Occupational hazard.
[throws the empty pistol on the floor]
Graves: You see, I have a gift. An instinct for sensing people's weaknesses. Yours is women. Hers and mine are winning, whatever the cost. So when I arranged for that fatal overdose for the true victor at Sydney, I won myself my very own MI6 agent, using everthing at my disposal - her brains, her talent, even her sex.
James Bond: The coldest weapon of all.
James Bond: You know, I've missed your sparkling personality.
Zao: [punching Bond in the stomach] How's that for a punch line?
James Bond: I'm looking for a North Korean.
James Bond: Terrorist.
Raul: One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter.
[Graves and Bond are fighting in a depressurizing plane]
Graves: Ya see Mr. Bond, you can't kill my dreams. But my dreams can kill you. Time to face destiny.
[James pulls Graves' parachute cord]
James Bond: Time to face gravity.
Graves: We only met briefly, but you left a lasting impression. You see, when your intervention forced me to present the world with a new face, I chose to model the disgusting Gustav Graves on you. I paid attention to details - that unjustifiable swagger, the crass quips, the self-defence mechanism concealing such inadequacy...
James Bond: [holding up his Walther P99] My self-defence mechanism's right here.
Miranda Frost: I know all about you, 007. Sex for dinner, death for breakfast. Well, it's not going to work with me.
James Bond: No?
Miranda Frost: No.
[Bond kisses Miss Frost again]
James Bond: You're getting good at this.
Miranda Frost: Oh, stop it. Are we still being watched?
James Bond: No, they left ages ago.
Miranda Frost: Oh God, you're impossible! Come on, let's get out of here.
Patient: What the hell do you want? I don't need a goddamn wheelchair.
James Bond: No?
James Bond: You do now.
Miranda Frost: I'll show you your room.
James Bond: A palace of ice; you must feel right at home.
James Bond: You know, you're cleverer than you look.
Q: Still, better than looking cleverer than you are.
Colonel Moon: You will not live to see the day all Korea is ruled by the North.
James Bond: Then you and I have something in common.
Peaceful: I'm Peaceful Fountains of Desire, the masseuse. I come with compliments of the manager.
James Bond: I'm sure you do. Come in.
Peaceful: On the bed please. Face down.
James Bond: Yes, of course.
[Bond wraps his arms around Peaceful]
Peaceful: I'm not that kind of masseuse.
James Bond: [Bond grabs her hand and grabs the gun from her inner thigh holster] I'm not that kind of customer.
[entering the 5-star hotel drenched in hospital clothes]
James Bond: My usual suite, please.
Snooty Desk clerk: [sarcastically] Do you have a credit card... or any luggage?
James Bond: I see you don't chase dreams, you live them.
Graves: One of the virtues of never sleeping, Mr. Bond. I have to live my dreams. Besides, plenty of time to sleep when you're dead.
James Bond: You must be joking.
Q: As I learned from my predecessor, Bond, I never joke about my work.
Mr. Chang: Ah, Mr Bond, a little thank you from us.
[Hands a box to Bond]
James Bond: [Bond finds money and a ticket to Cuba in the box] Cuba.
Mr. Chang: It seems Mr. Zao has lost himself in Havana. If you find him, say goodbye from us.
James Bond: With pleasure.
[Q and Bond enter Q's office as Bond looks around at the vast array of devices left over from previous cases]
James Bond: So, this is where they keep the old relics, then, eh?
Q: I'll have you know our TOP cutting-edge technology is designed here.
James Bond: [releasing the knife from the briefcase used in the From Russia With Love affair and fingering a blade] Point taken...
Q: Must you touch everything?
James Bond: [seeing his Thunderball jet pack] Hey, does this still work?
[James activates the jet pack, and Q struggles to subdue it]
Q: Now look...
James Bond: [holding up the knife-studded shoe worn by Rosa Klebb years ago] So where is this cutting-edge stuff?
Q: I'm trying to get to it.
M: You had your cyanide...
James Bond: Threw it away years ago...
Verity: I see you handle your weapon well.
James Bond: I have been known to keep my tip up.
James Bond: Do you believe in bad luck?
Jinx: Let's just say my relationships don't seem to last.
James Bond: I know the feeling.
Miss Moneypenny: [Moneypenny is typing a disinformative newspaper report in her office, when 007 walks in] James!
James Bond: Moneypenny.
[Bond and Moneypenny embrace and kiss. Bond lays Moneypenny out on her desk]
Miss Moneypenny: Oh, James...
[Continue kissing, when all of a sudden... ]
Q: [walking in] Moneypenny?
[Moneypenny sits up abruptly and removes a pair of virtual reality simulation centre glasses]
Miss Moneypenny: Um... I was... um... just testing it out.
[She blushes and buttons her blouse]
Q: Oh, it's rather hard, isn't it?
Miss Moneypenny: Yes... very...
Miranda Frost: [Naked, in bed with Bond] This is crazy. You're a 00.
James Bond: It's only a number.
James Bond: Check the tape. You'll find he's dead and she only has a flesh wound.
Q: There's always an excuse, isn't there, Double-O-Zero?
Q: [Explaining the Aston Martin] ... Your new transportation
[nothing visible on the platform]
James Bond: I think you've been down here too long...
James Bond: Vodka martini, plenty of ice... if you can spare it.
Jinx: Giacinta Johnson. My friends call me Jinx.
James Bond: My friends call me James Bond.
Jinx: Wait, don't pull it out. I'm not finished with it yet.
James Bond: See? It's a perfect fit.
Jinx: Uh-hm. Leave it in.
James Bond: It's gotta come out sooner or later.
Jinx: No, leave it in, please. Few more minutes?
James Bond: We really have to get these back.
[Takes a diamond out of Jinx's belly button]
Jinx: Still the good guys, huh?
James Bond: I'm still not quite sure - how good you are.
Jinx: I am *so* good.
James Bond: Especially when you're bad.
James Bond: Not Jinx anymore?
Jinx: Oh, I'll always be a jinx to you.
Graves: Are you a gambling man Mr. Bond?
James Bond: If the stakes are right.
Graves: And Mr.?
James Bond: Bond. James Bond
James Bond: [Bond breaks a glass partition, revealing Chinese agents watching him] You didn't think I knew that you were always Chinese intelligence Chang?
Mr. Chang: Hong Kong's our turf now, Bond.
James Bond: Well, don't worry. I'm not here to take it back.
Raul: We may have lost the Revolution, but our health system is second to none.
James Bond: You don't seem to have done too badly after the Revolution...
Raul: We all have our ways of getting by - you would be surprised how many government officials come to me with little reminders about decadent times.
James Bond: I know - can I take these?
[He holds up a book about birds written by his namesake and a pair of binoculars]
[James Bond saves himself and Jinx from certain death by piloting a helicopter from a standing start at 10,000 feet]
James Bond: [to Jinx] Now... you said something about going down... together?
Colonel Moon: Mr Van Bierk.
[Picks up Tankbuster]
Colonel Moon: Our new tankbuster. Depleted uranium shells, naturally.
James Bond: Naturally.
James Bond: [after he gives Col. Moon the briefcase full of diamonds, rigged with explosives] Don't blow it all at once.
Air Hostess: Your drink, sir.
James Bond: Lucky I asked for it shaken.
Graves: Glad you could make it Mr. Bond. How did you like my run?
James Bond: Like a man on the edge of losing control.
Graves: It's only by being on the edge that we know who we really are - under the skin.
Graves: He died chasing a dream. Isn't that the way to go?
James Bond: I'd rather not go at all.
James Bond: I'm checking out. Thanks for the Kiss of Life.
James Bond: Can I expect the pleasure of you in Iceland?
Miranda Frost: I'm afraid you'll never have that pleasure, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: What are you, CIA?
Jinx: NSA. Hello, we're on the same side.
James Bond: Doesn't mean we're after the same thing.
Jinx: Sure it does. World peace, unconditional love, and our little friend with the expensive acne.
James Bond: Give me the old fashioned target range, Quartermaster.
Q: Yes, well, it's called the future, so get used to it.
Mr. Kil: I'm Mr. Kil.
James Bond: Now there's a name to die for.
Zao: It appears we are equal... in the eyes of spies.
James Bond: Equal... but not even.
James Bond: I know the rules, and number one is "no deals'.
James Bond: Zao, I've been traded. Your time will come.
Zao: Yes, but not as soon as yours.
Falco: James Bond... just in time for the fireworks.
James Bond: Let's get down to business.
James Bond: So you live to die another day.
James Bond: There will be others after me. You know that.
Graves: Oh, you mean your American friend Jinx? Soon to be the victim of a tragedy. An ice palace can be such a treacherous place.
General Moon: Fifty years after the superpowers carved Korea in two... and then you arrive. A British spy. It's proved the hardliners correct, that we cannot trust the west. And you... you took away my son!
James Bond: You're firing squad there should have done the job for me.
James Bond: Just surviving Mr Change, just surviving.
James Bond: You think I haven't always known you're Chinese intelligence, Chang?
Mr. Chang: Hong Kong's our turf now, Bond!
James Bond: Don't worry, I'm not here to take it back. Put your hands down.
Mr. Chang: What the hell do you want?
James Bond: Just to help you settle a score. Zao killed three of your men. You get me into North Korea, I'll take care of him for you.
Mr. Chang: What's in it for you?
James Bond: A chance to get even.
Colonel Moon: How do you propose to kill me know, Mr. Bond? It's pathetic! You British still believe you have the right to police the world. But, you will not live to see the day, all Korea is ruled by the North.
James Bond: Then you and I have something in common.
James Bond: Perhaps you could send up my tailor and some food.
Mr. Chang: The lobster's good - with quails eggs and sliced seaweed.
James Bond: Mm-hmm. And if there's any left, eh, '61 Bollinger.
Mr. Chang: Of course.
James Bond: Mojito, por favor.
James Bond: Nothing to see till the morning. Not out there anyway.
Jinx: So, what do predators do - when the sun goes down?
James Bond: They feast - like there's no tomorrow.
Jinx: Are you always this frisky?
James Bond: I've been missing the touch of a good woman.
Jinx: [Jokingly pulls out a knife] Who says I'm good?
M: Well, it seems you've become useful again.
James Bond: Hmm, then maybe it's time you let me get on with my job.
Q: [after a virtual reality shootout exercise] A perfect marksman isn't really supposed to shoot his own boss.
James Bond: Check the replay. You'll find he's dead and she's only got a flesh wound.
Q: There's always an excuse, isn't there, 00-zero.
Q: Now, a new watch. This should be your 20th, I believe.
James Bond: How time flies.
Q: Yes, well 007, why don't you establish a record by actually returning this one.
Miranda Frost: Mr. Bond.
James Bond: Aw, Miss Frost.
Miranda Frost: I'll show you your room.
James Bond: A palace of ice! You must feel right at home.
Jinx: Sorry I left you in an explosive situation. You're a big boy. I figured you could handle it yourself.
James Bond: No wonder your relationships don't last.
Jinx: I'm a girl that just doesn't like to get tied down.
Miranda Frost: [Grabs Bond and kisses him] M warned me this would happen.
James Bond: That's why you tried so hard not to be interested in me.
Miranda Frost: Oh God, you're even worse than your file says.
James Bond: [Being observed by Graves Security Guards] They don't look too convinced. Come on, put your back into it.
[Kisses Miss Frost]
Miranda Frost: James, be careful.
James Bond: Go back to your room. I'll come back for you.
James Bond: The same person who set me up then has just set me up again, to get Zao out. So, I'm going after him!
M: The only place you're going is our evaluation center in the Falklands. 00 status receded.
James Bond: Saved by the bell.
James Bond: You burned me, and now you want my help?
M: Did you expect an apology?
M: What did you find in Cuba?
James Bond: A clinic specializing in gene therapy - new identities courtesy of DNA transplants.
M: A self-called beauty parlour... We heard rumours of such a place - I didn't think it even existed!
James Bond: It doesn't any more...
James Bond: [Bond says goodbye in Danish to Moneypenny on the phone while making love to his language tutor] Goodbye my sweet.
Moneypenny: You always were a cunning linguist, James.
Moneypenny: [M walks up from behind Moneypenny] Don't ask.
M: Don't tell.
Q: It's the insurance damage waiver for your beautiful new car. Now, will you need collision coverage?
James Bond: Yes.
James Bond: Probably.
Q: Property destruction?
James Bond: Definitely.
Q: Personal Injury?
James Bond: I hope not, but accidents do happen.
Q: They frequently do with you.
James Bond: Well, that takes care of the normal wear-and-tear. Is there any other protection I need?
Q: Only from me 007, unless you bring that car back in pristine order.
[the phone in Bond's car ring]
James Bond: Yes?
Elliot Carver: Good Morning, Mr. Bond. Elliot Carver. I beleive you have two things that belong to me!
James Bond: What are you talking about?
Elliot Carver: The encoder, in the dash of your car...
Elliot Carver: ...And my wife, in your hotel room!
James Bond: You were pretty good with that hook.
Wai-Lin: Thanks. It comes from growing up in a rough neighborhood. You were pretty good on the bike.
James Bond: Thank you. It comes from not growing up at all.
Wai-Lin: They're looking for us, James.
James Bond: Let's stay under cover.
James Bond: [after throwing a bad guy into a printing press] They'll print anything these days.
Elliot Carver: According to Eastern philosophy, the body has seven different chakra points. The Energy centers, like the heart, or genitals. The purpose of these implements is to probe those organs, inflicting the maximum amount of pain whilst keeping the victim alive for as long as possible.
Mr. Stamper: Dr. Kaufman's record was fifty-two hours. I'm hoping to break it.
James Bond: I would have thought watching your TV shows was torture enough.
James Bond: I always wondered how I'd feel if I ever saw you again.
[Paris turns around slaps Bond across the face]
James Bond: Now I know. Was it something I said?
Paris Carver: How about the words, "I'll be right back"?
James Bond: Something came up.
Paris Carver: Something always came up.
[to Carver before he is kiled by the sea-vac]
James Bond: You forgot the first rule of mass media, Elliot! GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT!
Dr. Kaufman: This is very embarrassing. It seems there is a red box they need in your car, only they can't get it open. They want me to get you to tell how to open it. I feel like an idiot, I don't know what to say.
[Bond just smiles]
Dr. Kaufman: I am to torture you if you don't do it.
James Bond: Do you have a doctorate in that as well?
Dr. Kaufman: No, no this is more like a hobby... but I am very gifted.
James Bond: Oh, I believe you.
[Bond has taken Gupta hostage and is negotiating with Carver to exchange him for Wai Lin, who herself is being held captive by Carver]
Elliot Carver: [to Stamper and his security forces regarding Bond] Don't shoot him, yet.
Mr. Stamper: [to his men over a two-way radio] Hold your fire.
Elliot Carver: Welcome to my world crisis, Mr. Bond!
James Bond: Even trade, Elliot; Gupta for Wai Lin. You can't fire the missile without him.
Elliot Carver: [Holding Wai Lin at gunpoint] And it seems you can't resist any woman in my possession.
Wai-Lin: What are you waiting for, shoot him!
James Bond: [to Wai Lin] I told you, we're gonna finish this together!
Elliot Carver: How romantic! Do you realize how absurd your position is?
James Bond: No more absurd than starting a war for ratings.
Elliot Carver: Great men have always manipulated the media to save the world. Look at William Randolph Hearst, who told his photographers, "You provide the pictures, I'll provide the war." I've just taken it one step further.
[Bond open fires on one of Stamper's men, killing him]
James Bond: Sorry about that, I've tuned out there for a moment, Elliot.
Elliot Carver: [to Bond] TouchÃ©.
Elliot Carver: Mr. Gupta, is the missile ready to fire?
Gupta: Press the magic button, Beijing disappears.
Elliot Carver: Well, it seems you've outlived your contract!
[Carver shoots Gupta]
Elliot Carver: You see, Mr. Bond, I have a backup plan
James Bond: Uh-huh. So do I.
[Bond remotely releases a grenade from a case and detonates it, breaching the hull of the stealth boat]
Paris Carver: Do you know I used to look in the papers every day for your obituary.
James Bond: Well, I'm sorry I keep disappointing you.
James Bond: Another Carver building. If I didn't know better, I'd say he developed an edifice complex.
Wai Lin: [straddling Bond on a motorcycle] Don't get any ideas, Mr Bond.
James Bond: I wouldn't dream of it.
Tamara Steel: Mr. Carver here is the banker Mr.
James Bond: Bond, James Bond.
M: I believe you once had a relationship with Carver's wife, Paris.
James Bond: That was a long time ago, M... before she was married. I didn't realize it was public knowledge.
Moneypenny: Queen and country, James.
M: Your job is to find out whether Carver or someone in his organization sent that ship off course, and why. Use your relationship with Mrs. Carver, if necessary.
James Bond: I doubt if she'll remember me.
M: Remind her. Then pump her for information.
Moneypenny: You'll just have to decide how much pumping is needed, James.
James Bond: If only that were true of you and I, Moneypenny.
Elliot Carver: Mr. Bond, Ms. Lin. Welcome to Saigon. Please come in.
James Bond: It's always a pleasure to see you, Elliot.
Elliot Carver: I wasn't planning on opening this center until tomorrow. But you're just in time to help me finish writing the inaugural story, YOUR obituaries.
Jack Wade: You know that, officially, Uncle Sam is completely neutral in this turkey shoot.
James Bond: And unofficially?
Jack Wade: We have no interest in seeing World War III - unless we start it.
Wai-Lin: [Bond and Wai-Lin are handcuffed together] If I didn't know better, I'd say you were following me around, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: You have to admit, though: we seem to have developed a certain attachment to each other.
Wai-Lin: Hopefully not for long.
Elliot Carver: Don't you realise how absurd your position is?
James Bond: No more absurd than starting a war for ratings.
James Bond: I think we understand each other.
Q: Grow up, 007.
Wai Lin: [bobbing in the South China Sea in scuba gear] Still interested in hostile takeovers?
James Bond: It's the opportunities for travel, that I like best about banking.
Wai-Lin: It's mostly dull routine, of course, but every now and then you get to sail on a beautiful evening like this. And sometimes work with a decadent agent of a corrupt Western power.
James Bond: And they say communists don't know how to have fun.
Wai-Lin: Oh, I hate to disappoint you; but, I don't even have a little red book.
James Bond: Hello Elliot, interesting plan!
Elliot Carver: So much for German Efficiency!
James Bond: [after Bond hears the female voice in the car] I think we've met.
James Bond: [on the motorcycle] Get on the back!
Wai Lin: Why? Are you trying to protect me?
James Bond: No, I need to balance the bike. Now get on the back!
[finding Paris's body in his hotel room, Bond suddenly realizes the news report in the background is reporting his death along with hers]
Dr. Kaufman: [click] I have a clear shot at your head, Mr. Bond. Stand up, slowly, drop your gun, and kick it towards me, ja?
[Bond does so]
Dr. Kaufman: Good. Now sit down on the bed next to Mrs. Carver.
[Bond does so, and Kaufman turns off the TV and extracts a videotape from the VCR]
Dr. Kaufman: The story will be on the news in an hour.
James Bond: "Tomorrow's News Today."
Dr. Kaufman: Just so.
Q: I am not interested in your sordid escapades. Let's get on with it, shall we. Your new telephone. Talk here. Listen here.
James Bond: So that's what I've been doing wrong all these years.
Q: Look, it also includes a fingerprint scanner. a 2,000 volt security system, and this I'm particularly proud of - the remote control for your car. Tap twice. One. Two.
Q: Now, draw very slowly across the pad to drive the car. It's surprisingly difficult to drive; but, with practice...
James Bond: Well, let's see how she responds to my touch, eh, Q?
James Bond: It won't look like a suicide if you shoot me from over there.
Dr. Kaufman: I am a professor of forensic medicine. Believe me, Mr. Bond, I could shoot you from Stuttgart und still create ze proper effect.
James Bond: [Bond is practicing speaking Danish with his language tutor; while making love to her]
Professor Inga Bergstrom: I am pleased with your progress, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: I've always enjoyed studying a new tongue, Professor.
Professor Inga Bergstrom: One might say you have a natural ability.
James Bond: But practice makes perfect.
James Bond: Filthy Habit!
James Bond: Are you sure you can do this on your own?
Wai-Lin: It depends whether your mission is peace or revenge.
James Bond: This is about stopping a war.
Moneypenny: [Calling on the phone] James? Where are you?
James Bond: [In bed with a Danish Professor] Oh, Moneypenny. Um. I'm just up here at Oxford, brushing up on a little Danish.
Professor Inga Bergstrom: Little?
Moneypenny: I'm afraid you're going to have to kiss off your lesson, James. We've got a situation here at the Ministry of Defense. We're sending the fleet to China.
Party Waiter: Something to drink, Mrs. Carver?
Paris Carver: Mr. Bond will have Vodka martini, shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: Mrs. Carver will have a Tequila, straight shot.
Paris Carver: No. Mrs. Carver will have a glass of Mr. Carver's champagne.
James Bond: [Making a toast] To you.
Paris Carver: No, to the gun.
Paris Carver: [sighs] What was it James? Did I get too close? Did I get to close for - comfort?
James Bond: Yes.
[Passionate kiss, then Bond undresses Paris]
Paris Carver: I missed you.
Jack Wade: Yo! Jimbo!
James Bond: Wade, what the hell are you doing here?
Jack Wade: Jimbo, you know the world's my office.
James Bond: I may have some breaking news for you, Elliot.
James Bond: Never argue with a woman. They're always right.
Elliot Carver: Mr. Gupta, is the missile ready to launch?
Gupta: Press the magic button, Beijing disappears!
Elliot Carver: Well, it seems you've outlived your contract!
[Carver shoots Gupta, instantly killing him]
Elliot Carver: You see, Mr. Bond, I have a backup plan!
James Bond: U-huh... So do I!
James Bond: Why did you marry him?
Paris Carver: He told me he loved me.
James Bond: That always sounds good.
James Bond: [on the phone] Bond here.
James Bond: Are these pictures live?
M: Unlike the American government, we prefer not to get our bad news from CNN.
Alec Trevelyan: We're both orphans, James. But while your parents had the luxury of dying in a climbing accident, mine survived the British betrayal and Stalin's execution squads. My father couldn't let himself or my mother live with the shame. MI6 figured I was too young to remember. And in one of life's little ironies, the son went to work for the government whose betrayal caused the father to kill himself and his wife.
James Bond: Hence Janus. The two-faced Roman god come to life.
Alec Trevelyan: It wasn't God who gave me this face! It was you, setting the timers for three minutes instead of six.
James Bond: Am I supposed to feel sorry for you?
Alec Trevelyan: No. You were supposed to die for me.
Alec Trevelyan: And, by the way, I did think about asking you to join my little scheme but somehow I knew, 007's loyalty was always to the mission, never to his friend.
Alec Trevelyan: Closing time, James! Last call.
[Bond raises his gun to kill Alec but is tranquilized by a sniper]
Alec Trevelyan: [walks towards Bond and looks down on him] For England, James.
M: You don't like me, Bond. You don't like my methods. You think I'm an accountant, a bean counter more interested in my numbers than your instincts.
James Bond: The thought had occurred to me.
M: Good, because I think you're a sexist, misogynist dinosaur. A relic of the Cold War, whose boyish charms, though wasted on me, obviously appealed to that young woman I sent out to evaluate you.
James Bond: Point taken.
[Q has blown up a dummy with an explosive pen]
Q: Don't say it...
James Bond: The writing is on the wall.
Q: Along with the rest of him.
Jack Wade: Jack Wade, CIA.
James Bond: James Bond, stiff-ass Brit.
[Bond and Natalya are trying to escape from the train when Trevelyan talks to them on the loudspeaker]
Alec Trevelyan: Good luck with the floor James. I've set the timers for six minutes, the same six minutes you gave me. It was the least I could do for a "friend".
Natalya Simonova: What does he mean?
James Bond: We've got three minutes.
James Bond: Who is the competition?
Jack Wade: Ah, an ex-KGB guy. Tough mother. Got a limp in his right leg. Name's Zukovsky.
James Bond: Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky?
Jack Wade: Yeah, you know him?
James Bond: I gave him the limp.
Alec Trevelyan: [hanging from his foot held by Bond's hands] For England, James?
James Bond: No. For me.
[lets Trevelyan go]
Dimitri Mishkin: Good morning, Mr. Bond. Sit. I'm Defense Minister Dimitri Mishkin. So, by what means shall we execute you, Commander Bond?
James Bond: What, no small-talk? No chit-chat? That's the trouble with the world today. No one takes the time to do a really sinister interrogation anymore. It's a lost art.
Dimitri Mishkin: Your sense of humour does not sway me, Commander, I'm sorry. Where is the GoldenEye?
James Bond: I assumed you had it.
Dimitri Mishkin: I have an English spy, a Severnaya programmer and a helicopter stolen...
James Bond: ...or at least that's what some traitor in your government wanted it to look like.
Dimitri Mishkin: Who was behind your attack on Severnaya?
James Bond: WHO HAD THE AUTHORIZATION CODES?
Dimitri Mishkin: RUSSIA MAY HAVE CHANGED BUT THE PENALTY FOR TERRORISM IS STILL DEATH!
James Bond: AND WHAT'S THE PENALTY FOR TREASON?
Natalya Simonova: Oh, stop it, both of you! Stop it! You're like boys with toys!
James Bond: Governments change... the lies stay the same.
Xenia Onatopp: You don't need the gun, Commander.
James Bond: Well, that depends on your definition of safe sex.
Alec Trevelyan: In 16 minutes and 43 sec - in 42 seconds, the United Kingdom will reenter the stone age.
James Bond: A worldwide financial meltdown. And all so mad little Alec can settle a score with the world, 50 years on.
Alec Trevelyan: Oh, please James, spare me the Freud. I might as well ask you for the vodka martinis that have silenced the screams of all the men you've killed... or if you find forgiveness in the arms of all those willing women, for all the dead ones you failed to protect.
Q: A pen. This is a Class 4 grenade. Three clicks arms the four-second fuse, another three disarms it.
[Bond takes the pen, clicks three times]
James Bond: How long did you say the fuse was?
[Q takes the pen back and disarms it]
Q: Oh grow up, 007.
James Bond: They always said the pen was mightier than the sword.
Q: Thanks to me they were right!
[Q appears, wheelchair-bound with his leg in a cast]
James Bond: Morning Q. Sorry about the leg. Skiing?
[Q's leg "cast" fires a rocket across the room]
James Bond: [while talking about the incident at Savernaya] They're not just criminals Valentin, they're traitors.
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: Well, what do you expect from a Lienz Cossack?
James Bond: What?
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: This Janus, I've never met the man, but I know that he is a Lienz Cossack.
James Bond: Group that worked for the Nazis against the Russians. Second World War.
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: You know your history, Mr. Bond. At the end of the war, they surrendered to the British, thinking they would help in waging war against the Communists. But, the British betrayed them, sent them back to Stalin, who promptly had them all shot. Women, children, entire families.
James Bond: Not exactly our finest hour.
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: Still, ruthless people. They got what they deserved.
Alec Trevelyan: James... what an unpleasant surprise.
James Bond: We aim to please.
Alec Trevelyan: [grabs a machine gun that's on the ground but Bond puts his foot on it first] Why can't you just be a good boy and die?
James Bond: You first.
[looks at Xenia]
James Bond: You, second. UP!
Natalya Simonova: Do you destroy every vehicle you get into?
James Bond: Standard operating procedure. Boys with toys.
Caroline: James, is it really necessary to drive quite so fast?
James Bond: More often than you'd think.
General Ourumov: This is Colonel Ourumov. Come out with your hands above your head.
James Bond: How original.
James Bond: Alec?
Alec Trevelyan: Back from the dead. No longer just an anonymous star on the memorial wall at MI6. What's the matter, James? No glib remark? No pithy comeback?
Caroline: I enjoy a spirited ride as much as the next girl, but...
[a woman, Xenia Onatopp, pulls up alongside and smiles]
Caroline: Who's that?
James Bond: The next girl.
James Bond: Banco. It appears we share the same passions: three, anyway.
Xenia Onatopp: I count two: motoring and, uh, baccarat.
[James reveals a losing hand]
Xenia Onatopp: I hope the third is where your real talent lies.
James Bond: One rises to meet a challenge.
James Bond: I trusted you, Alec.
Alec Trevelyan: Trust? What a quaint idea.
James Bond: Vodka martini - shaken, not stirred. And for you?
Xenia Onatopp: The same.
James Bond: How do you take it?
Xenia Onatopp: Straight up - with a twist.
Jack Wade: [Talking about Natalya] Did you check her out?
James Bond: Head to toe.
Q: Right. Now pay attention 007. First, your new car. BMW Agile 54 with gears. All points radar. Self destruct system. And, naturally, all the usual refinements. Now, this I'm particularly proud of - behind the headlights, stinger missiles!
James Bond: Excellent, just the thing for unwinding after a rough day at the office.
Q: Need I remind you, 007, that you have a licence to kill, not to break the traffic laws.
Natalya Simonova: He was a friend, Trevelyan?
James Bond: Yes.
Natalya Simonova: Now he's your enemy and you will kill him. It is that simple?
James Bond: In a word, yes.
Natalya Simonova: Unless he kills you first?
James Bond: Natalya...
Natalya Simonova: You think I'm impressed? All of you with your guns, your killing, your death. For what? So you can be a hero? All the heroes I know are dead. How can you act like this? How can you be so cold?
James Bond: It's what keeps me alive.
Natalya Simonova: No. It's what keeps you alone.
James Bond: It's too easy.
Alec Trevelyan: Half of everything is luck, James.
James Bond: And the other half?
[alarms begin to go off]
Alec Trevelyan: Fate!
Xenia Onatopp: Thank you, Mister...
James Bond: The name's Bond. James Bond.
Xenia Onatopp: Xenia Sergeyevna Onatopp.
James Bond: Onatopp?
Xenia Onatopp: Onatopp.
Caroline: I know what you're doing.
James Bond: Really? What's that, dear?
Caroline: You are just trying to show off the size of your... your um...
James Bond: Engine?
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: [as Bond draws a gun to his head] Walther PPK, 7.65 millimeter. Only three men I know use such a gun. I believe I've killed two of them.
James Bond: Lucky me.
[a gun is pointed at the back of Bond's head]
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: I think not.
James Bond: She always did enjoy a good squeeze.
[Russian in toilet cubicle looks around his newspaper to see Bond hanging from the ceiling]
James Bond: Beg your pardon, forgot to knock.
James Bond: Why?
Alec Trevelyan: Hilarious question, particularly from you. Did you ever ask why? Why we toppled all those dictators, undermined all those regimes, only to come home: "Well done, good job, but sorry, old boy, everything you risked your life and limb for has changed."
James Bond: It was the job we were chosen for.
Alec Trevelyan: Of course you'd say that, James Bond, her majesty's loyal terrier, defender of the so-called faith.
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: So why did you not kill me?
James Bond: Call it professional courtesy.
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: [Drawing a gun] Then I should extend you the same courtesy.
Q: A typical leather belt, size...
James Bond: Q, I'm familiar with that device.
Natalya Simonova: On the train, when you told him to kill me, and that I meant nothing to you, did you mean it?
James Bond: Yes. Basic rule: always call their bluff.
Jack Wade: Come on, my car's over there.
James Bond: After you.
Jack Wade: Thank you.
[comes up after Jack Wade and traps him with the car door and draws his gun on him]
James Bond: Like you said, "Drop it".
Jack Wade: All right, in London April is a spring month, whereas in St. Petersburg we're freezing our butts off. Is that close enough for government work?
James Bond: No. Show me the rose.
Jack Wade: Please, no.
[Bonds shoves his gun into Wade]
Jack Wade: Alright, alright, alright.
[Wade unbuckles his pants and shows him his rose tattoo with the name "Muffy"]
James Bond: Muffy?
Jack Wade: Third wife.
James Bond: [as soldiers blow up a door] Shut the door Alec! There's a draft!
Xenia Onatopp: Enjoy it while it lasts.
James Bond: The very words I live by.
Miss Moneypenny: You know, this sort of behaviour could qualify as sexual harassment.
James Bond: Really. What's the penalty for that?
Miss Moneypenny: Someday, you'll have to make good on your innuendos.
James Bond: In London, April's a spring month.
Jack Wade: Oh yeah? And what are you, the weatherman? I mean, for crying out loud... another stiff-ass Brit, with your secret codes and your passwords. One of these days you guys are gonna learn just to drop it.
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: James Bond. Charming, sophisticated secret agent. "Shaken, but not disturbed."
[Zukovsky and his men laugh]
James Bond: I see you haven't lost your delicate sense of humour, Valentin.
[nods toward the stage]
James Bond: Or your need for an audience. Who's strangling the cat?
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: [looks towards the stage] Strangling a cat?
[Zukovsky looks over at Irina, who singing out of tune, then takes out his gun and shoots right between Bond's legs]
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: That is Irina, my mistress.
James Bond: Very talented girl. Tell her to go.
[Zukovsky looks to the stage]
Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky: Irina, take a hike!
James Bond: Hmm, never seen you after hours, Moneypenny... lovely.
Miss Moneypenny: Thank you, James.
James Bond: Out on some kind of fashion assignment, dressing to kill?
Miss Moneypenny: I know you'll find this crushing, 007, but I don't sit at home every night praying for some international incident so I can run down here all dressed up to impress James Bond. I was on a date, if you must know, with a gentlemen. We went to the theater together.
James Bond: Moneypenny, I'm devastated.
Alec Trevelyan: You're late, 007.
James Bond: I had to stop in the bathroom.
Alec Trevelyan: Ready to save the world again?
James Bond: After you, 006.
Alec Trevelyan: James, for England.
James Bond: For England, Alec.
Caroline: James, I want you to stop this car!
James Bond: Really?
Caroline: Stop this car at once!
[Bond yanks the handbrake up and the car skids to a complete stop and moves in close to Caoline]
James Bond: As you can see, I have no problem with female authority.
[Opens a box of Bollinger Grand Annee Champagne 1988]
Caroline: James, you're incorrigible. What am I going to do with you?
James Bond: Well, let's toast to your evaluation, shall we?
James Bond: A very - thorough - evaluation.
Natalya Simonova: Who are you?
James Bond: I work for the British government. The more you tell me the more I can help you.
Jack Wade: Now, let me get this straight Jimmy - you shot him in the leg, you stole his car, you took his girl. And now you want Valentin Zukovsky to set you up with Janus?
James Bond: Yes
Jack Wade: Well what are you going to do, appeal to his heart?
James Bond: No, his wallet.
Jack Wade: Oh, that might work.
James Bond: [after leading her to Janus at gunpoint] Well, I've had a lovely evening, you?
Xenia Onatopp: Once again, Mr. Bond, the pleasure was all yours.
James Bond: You'll understand if I don't call.
Xenia Onatopp: I won't lose sleep over it.
James Bond: [Karate-chops her neck, knocking her unconscious] Sweet dreams.
James Bond: [Bond throws Onatopp off himself] No, no, no. No more foreplay. Take me to Janus.
Xenia Onatopp: BULIATCH!
Natalya Simonova: [Kissing in a field] I suppose there's someone watching.
James Bond: There's no-one within twenty-five miles, believe me.
Jack Wade: [Out of nowhere] Yo, Jimbo!
James Bond: Well, I must say, I've had a lovely evening. You?
Xenia Onatopp: Once again the pleasure was all yours.
[Natalya is trying to find Boris' location while Bond cuts a hole in the floor of the train]
Natalya Simonova: [referring to Boris' password] What else do you call your bottom?
James Bond: What?
Natalya Simonova: It's Boris' password, he plays word games. It's what I sit on but I don't take it with me.
James Bond: Chair.
Natalya Simonova: Like I said.
[Starts tracing Boris' location]
James Bond: [breaking a hole in the train with his foot] Thirty seconds!
Natalya Simonova: He's not in Russia, Germany, Paris, London, Madrid.
James Bond: Twenty-five seconds!
Natalya Simonova: New York, Toronto, Chicago, San Francisco.
James Bond: Twenty seconds!
Natalya Simonova: Mexico City, Rio, Miami.
[Bond breaks a hole in the floor of the train and grabs Natalya by the arm]
James Bond: Come on!
Natalya Simonova: Wait, he's in Cuba. Havana...
[the trace is terminated]
Natalya Simonova: ...No!
James Bond: Now!
[Bond and Natalya escape from the train with seconds to spare before the train explodes]
Q: Now, a typical leather belt... male, size 34 buckle, notch.
[Bond is playing with a computer]
Q: Are you finished?
[Bond closes the laptop]
James Bond: Yes.
Q: Good. A typical leather belt...
[Trevelyan and Ourumov are holding Natalya hostage on the train]
James Bond: Ourumov, what has this Cossack promised you? You knew, didn't you? He's a Lienz Cossack.
Alec Trevelyan: It's in the past.
James Bond: He'll betray you! Just like everyone else.
General Ourumov: Is this true?
Alec Trevelyan: What's true is that in 48 hours you and I will have more money than God. And Mr. Bond here will have a small memorial service with only Moneypenny and a few tearful restaurateurs in attendance.
Jack Wade: Maybe you two would like to finish debriefing each other at Guantanamo, hmm?
James Bond: You ready?
Natalya Simonova: I'm not going on a helicopter with you. No plane. No train. Nothing that moves.
James Bond: Darling, what could possibly go wrong, eh?
[after 006 kisses Natalya]
Alec Trevelyan: Lovely girl. Tastes like... like strawberries.
James Bond: I wouldn't know.
Alec Trevelyan: I would.
Jack Wade: Are you sure you want to do this? The last guy who dropped in uninvited went home air freight, in very small boxes.
James Bond: Make sure they send me home first class.
James Bond: I'm alone.
Alec Trevelyan: Aren't we all?
Natalya Simonova: Do something, get us out of here!
James Bond: I'm a little tied up! Never mind...
James Bond: What would I ever do without you?
Miss Moneypenny: As far as I can remember, James, you've never had me.
James Bond: Hope springs eternal.
James Bond: The things we do for frequent flyer mileage.
Natalya Simonova: So, tell me. Are there any other standard operating procedures I should be aware of?
James Bond: A thousand. But I only pay them...
[Natalia and James kiss]
James Bond: ...lip service.
James Bond: Governments change. The lies stay the same.
James Bond: You break into the Bank of England via computer, and transfer the money electronically. Just minutes before you set off the GoldenEye, which erases any trace of the transactions. Ingenious.
Alec Trevelyan: Thank you, James.
James Bond: But still, it boils down to petty theft. In the end, you're just a bank robber. Nothing more than a common thief.
Alec Trevelyan: Closing time, James. Last call!
James Bond: Buy me a pint.
James Bond: What words do you live by?
Xenia Onatopp: The trick is to quit while you're still ahead.
James Bond: That's one trick I've never learned. Perhaps you'll show me how it's done.
James Bond: Your accent, Georgian?
Xenia Onatopp: Very good, Mr. Bond. You've been to Russia?
James Bond: Not recently. I used to drop in occasionally. Shoot in and out.
James Bond: After you, Moneypenny.
Miss Moneypenny: No, I insist. You first.
M: So - GoldenEye exist.
James Bond: Yes.
M: What else do we know about the Janus syndicate?
James Bond: Top flight arms dealers headquartered in St. Petersburg. First outfit to restock the Iraqis during the Gulf War. The head man's unreliably described. No photographs. The woman - Onatopp - is our only confirmed contact.
M: Would you care for a drink?
James Bond: Thank you. Your predecessor kept some cognac on the top...
M: I prefer bourbon. Ice?
James Bond: Yes.
Jack Wade: Will you hand me that wrench, Jimmy?
James Bond: So, what do you know about Janus?
Jack Wade: Zilch!
James Bond: Trust me.
Natalya Simonova: Trust you? I don't even know your name.
Alec Trevelyan: Situation analysis: hopeless. You have no backup. No escape route. And I - have the only bargaining chip.
James Bond: Where is she?
Alec Trevelyan: Ah, yes. Your fatal weakness.
[On a Walkie Talkie]
Alec Trevelyan: Ourumov, bring her in.
Natalya Simonova: Don't stand there, get us out of here!
James Bond: Yes sir.
Natalya Simonova: Maybe I should take care of the transportation for our trip to Cuba.
James Bond: Our trip?
Natalya Simonova: Do you know how to disarm the weapon?
James Bond: I suppose that depends on what kind of weapon you're talking about disarming.
Jack Wade: Hello, Jimbo! Well, a little gift from ole, eh, what's his name? T? Z?
James Bond: Q.
Alec Trevelyan: For England, James?
James Bond: No. For me!
[Bond let's go of Trevelyan's foot and Trevelyan falls]
[Jack Wade borrows Bond's BMW]
James Bond: Don't push any of the buttons in that car.
Jack Wade: I'm just gonna go bombing around in it.
James Bond: Exactly.
[Xenia Onatopp approaches James Bond]
James Bond: That's close enough.
Xenia Onatopp: Not for what I have in mind.
James Bond: I like a woman who enjoys pulling rank.
Xenia Onatopp: Nice to meet you - Mr. Bond.
James Bond: The pleasure, I'm sure, was all mine.
Elektra King: I could have given you the world.
James Bond: The world is not enough.
Elektra King: Foolish sentiment.
James Bond: Family motto.
James Bond: Construction isn't exactly my speciality.
M: Quite the opposite, in fact.
James Bond: You're not retiring anytime soon - are you?
Q: Now, pay attention 007. I've always tried to teach you two things. First, never let them see you bleed.
James Bond: And the second?
Q: Always have an escape plan.
Julietta the Cigar Girl: Would you like to check my figures?
James Bond: Oh, I'm sure they're perfectly rounded.
James Bond: You would commit suicide for her?
Renard: You forget. I'm already dead.
James Bond: Haven't you heard? So is she.
James Bond: I've always wanted to have Christmas in Turkey.
Dr. Christmas Jones: Was that a Christmas joke?
James Bond: From me? No. Never.
Dr. Christmas Jones: Is it about time to unwrap your present?
[after Q introduces Bond to his successor]
James Bond: If you're Q, does that make him R?
R: Ah yes, the legendary 007 wit, or at least half of it.
James Bond: What business do you have with Elektra King?
Zukovsky: I thought it was *you* who was giving her the business.
Ms. Moneypenny: James! Have you brought me a souvenir from your trip? Chocolates? An engagement ring?
James Bond: I thought you might enjoy one of these.
[gives Ms. Moneypenny a cigar tube]
Ms. Moneypenny: How romantic. I know exactly where to put that.
[throws the cigar tube in the garbage]
James Bond: Oh Moneypenny, the story of our relationship: close, but no cigar.
James Bond: Where's M?
Elektra King: Soon she'll be everywhere.
James Bond: [hands the two-way radio phone to Elektra] Call him off.
[Elektra smirkly smiles and stares at James]
James Bond: I won't ask again. Call him off. CALL HIM OFF!
Elektra King: [talking on her two-way] Renard?
Elektra King: [to Bond] You wouldn't kill me. You'd miss me.
Renard: [answers on his two-way] Yes?
Elektra King: [talking on her two-way] Dive! Bond...
[Bond shoots Elektra in the chest]
James Bond: I never miss.
James Bond: Expecting Davidov? He caught a bullet instead of the plane. Get off. Keep your mouth shut.
Renard: You can't kill me. I'm already dead.
James Bond: Not dead enough for me.
Renard: You could show a little gratitude. I did spare your life at the banker's office. That's right. I couldn't. You were working for me. You delivered the money, killed King and now you brought me the plane.
James Bond: What's your plan for the bomb?
Renard: You first. Or could it be you don't have a plan?
James Bond: That bomb will never leave this room.
Renard: Neither will you.
[Renard and Bond pause for a moment. At that time, the bomb is being hoisted out of the silo]
Renard: How sad... to be threatened by a man who can't grasp what he's involved in.
James Bond: Revenge is not hard to fathom for a man who believes in nothing.
Renard: And what do you believe in? Preservation of Capital?
[Renard pulls away from Bond]
Renard: Go ahead. Shoot me. I welcome it. My men will hear the shot and kill you.
James Bond: And the firefight will bring down half the army from above.
Renard: But when a certain phone call isn't made in twenty minutes, Elektra dies.
James Bond: You're bluffing.
Renard: She's beautiful isn't she? You should have had her before, when she was innocent. How does it feel to know that I broke her in for you?
[Bond gets angry and pistol-whips Renard across the forehead. Renard falls to the ground]
James Bond: [as the puts the silencer on his P99] I usually hate killing an unarmed man. Cold-blooded murder is a filthy business.
Renard: A man tires of being executed.
James Bond: But in your case, I feel nothing just like you.
Renard: But then again, there's no point living if you can't feel alive?
James Bond: Huh?
James Bond: [in bed with Jones] I was wrong about you.
Dr. Christmas Jones: Yeah? How so?
James Bond: I thought Christmas only comes once a year.
Lachaise: So good of you to come see me, Mr. Bond, particularly on such short notice.
James Bond: If you can't trust a Swiss banker, what's the world come to?
[Zukovzky fixes the "Zukovsky's Finest" logo on his office door]
Zukovsky: There's nothing in this place straight.
[Zukovsky opens the door and is shocked to see Christmas sitting on a couch in his office]
Zukovsky: Who are you, and how did you get in? I'll call security and congratulate them. Drink?
[the office door moves back, and Bond appears holding a guy at gunpoint]
Zukovsky: Can't you just say a hello, like a normal person.
James Bond: [to guy] Get lost.
[the guy heads moves towards the door, and Bond grabs him by the shirt collar]
James Bond: [to guy] No, no, no, no, no. Down the back!
James Bond: What's your business with Elektra King?
Zukovsky: I thought you were the one giving her the business.
[Bond points his gun at Zukovsky and walks towards him. Zukovsky walks backwards towards the wall]
James Bond: She drops a million dollars in your casino and you don't even blink an eye! What's she paying you off for?
Zukovsky: [to Chistmas] You know, if I were you, a relationship with a man like that, I wouldn't bet on it.
[Bond tackles Zukovsky and shoves him back into a wall-mounted shelf full of caviar. At that moment, the sound of helicopters surround the skies over the caviar factory]
Zukovsky: Five thousand dollars of Beluga, ruined!
James Bond: That's nothing compared to what a twenty megaton nuclear bomb can do!
Zukovsky: What are you talking about?
Dr. Christmas Jones: We had a nuclear bomb stolen this morning!
James Bond: Renard and Elektra King are working together!
Zukovsky: I didn't know!
James Bond: Well what do you know?
Elektra King: You don't take "no" for an answer, do you?
James Bond: No
Elektra King: I hope you know how to ski, then.
James Bond: I came prepared for a cold reception.
Lachaise: I'm giving you the opportunity to walk out with the money, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: I'm giving you the opportunity to walk out with your life.
[a helicopter slices Bond's BMW in half]
James Bond: Q's not gonna like this!
James Bond: Elektra, this is a game I can't afford to play.
Dr. Christmas Jones: The world's greatest terrorist running around with six kilos of weapons-grade plutonium can't be good. I gotta get it back, or someone's gonna have my ass.
James Bond: First things first.
James Bond: Expecting Davidov? He caught a bullet, instead of the plane.
Renard: You can't kill me, I'm already dead.
James Bond: Oh yeah, not dead enough for me.
Dr. Christmas Jones: Wait a minute. Are you going to do what I think you're going to do?
James Bond: What do I need to defuse a nuclear bomb?
Dr. Christmas Jones: Me.
[Colonel Akakievich and Christmas storm in]
Colonel Akakievich: [to Bond] Hey! Drop the gun!
James Bond: Keep away, Colonel!
Dr. Christmas Jones: He's an imposter. Doctor Arkov is sixty-three years old.
James Bond: [about Renard and his men] This is your imposter, along with the men outside in the plane. They're stealing the bomb.
[Colonel Akakievich picks up an rifle and loads it]
Colonel Akakievich: I said drop it!
[Bond drops the PPK. Renard gets up off the floor]
Colonel Akakievich: [to Bond] On your knees!
[One of Renard's men removes a card from the bomb]
Renard: [Speaks Russian] Well done.
Renard: He would have killed us all.
[Takes a photograph from Christams's hand]
Renard: This is Peter?
Dr. Christmas Jones: Yeah, but he's no atomic scientist.
Renard: [to Akakievich] I suppose you were the one who let him down.
[Renard shoves the photograph at Akakievich and walks towards Bond]
Renard: [to Bond] You had me. But i know you couldn't...
[Renard squeezes Bond's left shoulder. Bond groans with pain]
Renard: ...shoulder the responsibility.
[Renard lets go of Bond's shoulder and starts walking towards the silo entrance]
Renard: [to Akakievich] Now, without any further interruptions, lets proceed.
Colonel Akakievich: Nyet! There are too many new faces around here, including yours. The bomb doesn't move until I am satisfied.
[to the terrorists]
Colonel Akakievich: Hey, all of you, to the surface, now!
[Renard's men open fire at Akakievich's men]
James Bond: Molly, I need a clean bill of health. You have to clear me for duty.
Dr. Molly Warmflash: James. That wouldn't really b...
James Bond: Ethical?
Dr. Molly Warmflash: Practical. Smart.
James Bond: Well let's just... skirt the issue, shall we?
[Bond removes Warmflash's skirt]
Dr. Molly Warmflash: You'd have to promise to call me...
James Bond: Oh yes.
[squeezes his shoulder that has been injured]
Dr. Molly Warmflash: ...this time.
James Bond: Whatever the doctor orders.
[after M arrived at the pipleine control centre, Bond and M go into a nearby room]
M: I Want an update. Where do we stand?
James Bond: [giving M the locator card] One of Renard's men removed a locator card from the bomb, so we can't track it. But...
M: [cutting Bond off] But what?
James Bond: With all due respect, I don't think you should be here.
M: May I remind you that YOU'RE the reason I'm here, Double-Oh-Seven. You disobeyed a direct order and left that girl alone.
James Bond: Perhaps that girl isn't as innocent as you think.
M: What are you saying?
James Bond: Supposed the inside man, the one who switched King's lapel pin, turned out to be an inside woman.
[M pauses for a moment]
M: She kills her father and attacks her own pipeline? Why? To what end?
James Bond: I don't know. Yet.
Dr. Christmas Jones: What's the story with you and Elektra?
James Bond: We're strictly plutonic, now.
James Bond: Revenge is not hard to fathom for a man who believes in nothing.
James Bond: I usually hate killing an unarmed man. Cold-blooded murder is a filthy business.
James Bond: She's waiting for you.
James Bond: [to Bull in regards to his gold teeth] I see you put your money where your mouth is.
James Bond: I suppose we all have to pay the piper sometime. Right, Q?
Q: Oh, pipe down, 007!
James Bond: Was it something I said?
Q: No, something you destroyed. My fishing boat! For my retirement, away from you!
James Bond: Give me the name.
Lachaise: I can't do that.
James Bond: [pointing his gun to Lachaise] Let's count to three. You can do that, can't you?
James Bond: [about the bomb in the pipeline] You've defused hundreds of these, right?
Dr. Christmas Jones: Yeah, but they're usually standing still.
James Bond: Yes, well, life is full of small challenges.
[having shot down a glider]
James Bond: See you back at the lodge. Heh.
Elektra King: M told me she was sending someone, Mr.?
James Bond: Bond. James Bond.
M: I thought we had time on our side.
James Bond: You used the girl as bait.
Bill Tanner: He was operating in Moscow in 1996. Pyongyang, North Korea before that. And he's been spotted in Afghanistan, Bosnia, Iraq, Iran, Beirut and Cambodia.
James Bond: All the romantic vacation spots.
Elektra King: You ski very well, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: You seem to enjoy being chased. Probably happens all the time.
Elektra King: Less often than you might think.
Elektra King: I can't breathe! I can't breathe! I can't breathe!
James Bond: Elektra!
Elektra King: I can't breathe!
James Bond: Elektra! Look at me. Look at me! Look at my eyes. Look at my eyes. Look at my eyes! - You're alright. Everything's alright. Trust me. Okay?
James Bond: Vodka martini. Shaken, not stirred.
Zukovsky: Bond! James Bond! Meet Nina and Verushka.
James Bond: Loose the girls, Valentin. We need to talk.
Elektra King: And what about you? What do you do to survive?
James Bond: I take pleasure - and great beauty.
Dr. Christmas Jones: So, you're a British spy. Do you have a name?
James Bond: The name's Bond. James Bond.
[Bond and Christmas emerge from the ruptured pipeline]
James Bond: [to Christmas as she emerges from the pipeline] Come on, give me your hand. Jump, jump, jump.
Dr. Christmas Jones: Do you wanna explain why you did that? I could have stopped that bomb! You almost killed us!
James Bond: I DID kill us! She thinks we're dead and she thinks she got away with it!
Dr. Christmas Jones: Do you wanna put that in English for those of us who don't speak spy. Who's she?
James Bond: Elektra King.
Dr. Christmas Jones: Well, why would she blow up her own pipeline?
James Bond: It makes her look innocent. The explosion covers up the theft of the plutonium. And they make it look like a terrorist attack.
Dr. Christmas Jones: [takes a tin of plutonium out of her bag] But why leave this half?
James Bond: So there's enough to spread around to cover up for the part that they did take
Dr. Christmas Jones: But what are they gonna do with the other half? Its not enough to make a nuclear bomb.
James Bond: You're the scientist. You tell me?
Dr. Christmas Jones: I don't know. But the world's greatest terrorist running around with 6 kilos of weapons-grade plutonium can't be good. I have to get it back. Or somebody's gonna have my ass.
James Bond: First things first.
[talks into the two-way radio attatched to his belt]
James Bond: Bond to Robinson, do you copy?
Dr. Christmas Jones: By the way, before we go any further, I just want to know. What's the story with you and Elektra?
James Bond: We're stictly plutonic, now.
James Bond: Bond to Robinson, copy?
James Bond: [to Chrismas] What's your story? What are you doing here in Kazakhstan?
Dr. Christmas Jones: Avoiding those kind of questions just like you.
Robinson: [from two way] I read you, Double-Oh-Seven. Red Alert. M is missing with Elektra, three men down. Await instructions. Out.
Dr. Christmas Jones: What do we do now?
James Bond: There's one critical element here I may have overlooked.
Dr. Christmas Jones: What, more plutonium?
James Bond: No. Beluga caviar.
Dr. Christmas Jones: Are You here for a reason, or are you just hoping for a glimmer?
James Bond: [With a bad Russian accent] Mikhail Arkov, Russian atomic energy department,
[Hands her the transport documents]
James Bond: and you are miss?
Dr. Christmas Jones: Doctor Jones. Christmas Jones, and don't tell me any jokes, I've heard them all.
James Bond: I don't know any doctor jokes.
Dr. Christmas Jones: [after looking at the transport documents] Here, they're okay, you can take the elevator, your friends are already down there.
James Bond: Do I get some type of protection?
Dr. Christmas Jones: What is down there is just weapons-grade plutonium. It's completely safe.
[Seeing Bond walking away]
Dr. Christmas Jones: Oh, doctor, aren't you forgetting something?
[Points to a board with badges on it]
James Bond: Yes, of course.
Dr. Christmas Jones: By the way.
Dr. Christmas Jones: Your English is very good for a Russian.
James Bond: [In Russian] I studied at Oxford.
Terroist: Do you bring it? The grease!
James Bond: Of course...
[hands him a bag, he pulls out some sports shoes]
[Bond and Anya are discovered making love]
General Anatol Gogol: XXX!
Sir Frederick Gray, Minister of Defence: Bond! What do you think you're doing?
James Bond: Keeping the British end up, sir.
Q: Right. Now pay attention, 007. I want you to take great care of this equipment. There are one or two rather special accessories...
James Bond: Q, have I ever let you down?
James Bond: Which bullet has my name on it? The first or the last?
Major Anya Amasova: I have never failed on a mission, Commander. Any mission.
James Bond: In that case, Major, one of us is bound to end up gravely disappointed, because neither have I.
[the motorcycle henchmen flies off a cliff in a cloud of feathers]
James Bond: All those feathers and he still can't fly!
Log Cabin Girl: But James, I need you!
James Bond: So does England!
James Bond: He just dropped in for a quick bite.
James Bond: [Sandor is barely holding onto Bond's necktie while dangling over the roof of a building] Where's Fekkesh?
[Bond knocks Sandor's hand away, he falls to his death]
James Bond: [straightens his tie] What a helpful chap.
James Bond: Don't you miss the outside world?
Stromberg: For me, this is all the world. There is beauty... there is ugliness... and there is death.
Sheikh Hoseim: Can I persuade you to accept a bed for the night?
[Claps his hands once]
James Bond: That's kind of you Hoseim, but I really feel like -
[turns and notices a harem girl walking towards him]
Sheikh Hoseim: Are you, eh, quite sure I can't persuade you to stay the night?
James Bond: When one is in Egypt, one should delve deeply into its treasures.
Major Anya Amasova: Where is Fekkesh?
James Bond: With the pharaohs.
James Bond: [Amasova has just used a Bond car gadget to kill an enemy] How did you know about that?
Major Anya Amasova: I stole the plans to this car two years ago.
Major Anya Amasova: The man I loved. He was in Austria 3 weeks ago. Did you kill him?
James Bond: When someone's behind you on skis at 40 miles per hour trying to put a bullet in your back, you don't always have time to remember a face. In our business, Anya, people get killed. We both know that. So did he. It was either him or me. The answer to the question is yes. I did kill him.
Major Anya Amasova: Then, when this mission is over, I will kill you.
Hotel Receptionist: I have a message for you.
James Bond: I think you just delivered it.
Major Anya Amasova: You don't have to worry about me, Mr. Bond. I went on a surviving course in Siberia.
James Bond: Yes, I believe a great number of your countrymen do. What did they teach you?
Major Anya Amasova: That it's very important - to have a positive - mental - attitude.
James Bond: Nothing more practical than that?
Major Anya Amasova: Food is also very important.
James Bond: Mm-hmm. What else?
Major Anya Amasova: When necessary, shared - bodily - warmth.
James Bond: That's the part I like.
[Kiss and embrace]
James Bond: Your time is running out, Stromberg!
Stromberg: Yours too, Mr. Bond. Yours too. And faster than you think.
James Bond: Oh, by the way, thanks for deserting me back there.
Major Anya Amasova: Every woman for herself, remember?
James Bond: Still, you did save my life.
Major Anya Amasova: We all make mistakes, Mr. Bond.
Major Anya Amasova: What happened to Kalba?
James Bond: He was cut off - permanently.
James Bond: Then how about a nightcap on the company? My company.
Captain Carter: That armour plating must be inches thick. We'll never get through it!
James Bond: Come on, let's go to the armoury.
Captain Carter: The armoury? What do you expect to find there?
James Bond: A nuclear missile!
[being endlessly pursued by Stromberg's villains]
James Bond: You ever get the feeling that somebody doesn't like you?
Major Anya Amasova: Commander James Bond, recruited to the British Secret Service from the Royal Navy. License to kill and has done so on numerous occasions. Many lady friends but married only once. Wife killed...
James Bond: [interrupts her] Alright, you've made your point.
Major Anya Amasova: You're sensitive, Mr. Bond?
James Bond: About some things.
James Bond: [after detaining Jaws with a huge magnet] How does that grab you?
James Bond: Where's Anya?
Stromberg: Well, well... a British agent in love with a Russian agent. DÃ©tente, indeed.
Barman: Yes, sir?
James Bond: The lady will have a - Bacardi on the rocks.
Major Anya Amasova: For the gentleman, vodka martini - shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: TouchÃ©.
Captain Carter: [as James is removing the warhead to a nuclear missile] James, are you sure you know what you're doing?
James Bond: Well, there has to be a first time for everything.
Felicca: If there is anything that you would like? Anything at all?
James Bond: Well, I had lunch; but, I seem to have missed dessert.
[Embrace and kiss]
Major Anya Amasova: You're not trying to take advantage of me, are you?
James Bond: [Sarcastically] The thought never crossed my mind.
James Bond: Mmm, maybe I misjudged Stromberg. Any man who drinks Dom Perignon '52 can't be all bad.
James Bond: The printout transmission unit, can you work it?
Captain Carter: Well sure, but James we've only got three minutes!
James Bond: [in the Lotus Esprit, just before destroying one of Stromberg's helicopters with a missile] It's time we said goodbye to an uninvited guest.
James Bond: Mr. Kalba, my name is Bond, James Bond.
Max Kalba: What of it?
James Bond: [Bond, posing as a marine biologist, examines a model of Atlantis] An underwater city. Well, everyone needs to have their dreams.
Stromberg: No dream, Mr. Sterling. Soon a reality.
[while making love]
Major Anya Amasova: But James, what will our superiors say?
James Bond: They're never going to know.
James Bond: Mr. Fekkesh is expecting me. I phoned him.
Felicca: He asked me to give you a message. He will be a little late.
James Bond: May I ask where he is?
Felicca: Mr. Fekkesh asked me to entertain you while you are waiting.
James Bond: Oh, really?
James Bond: Where is Fekkesh?
Felicca: You are very suspicious, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: Oh, I find I live much longer that way.
James Bond: What an unexpected pleasure. Welcome to the Mujaba Club. May I buy you a drink, Major Amasova - or may I call you XXX.
Major Anya Amasova: So, you know who I am.
James Bond: You made quite an impression.
Major Anya Amasova: Goodbye, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: Well, let's say "au revoir". I have the honest feeling we'll be meeting again sometime.
James Bond: You have something I'm interested in buying.
Major Anya Amasova: Just a moment. I would like to bid for it too. You forgot your drink, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: Thank you. Na zdorovje.
Max Kalba: It seems you have competition, Mr. Bond. And from where I sit, I fancy you will find the lady's figure - hard to match.
Major Anya Amasova: Make no mistake, Mr. Bond, I *want* that microfilm and I'm going to get it.
James Bond: Unless I get it first.
Major Anya Amasova: It's getting cold.
James Bond: I say, anything I can do to warm you up?
James Bond: Silly, isn't it. We can't talk and yet we're in the same business.
Major Anya Amasova: But with rival companies.
James Bond: We're not rivals at the moment.
James Bond: You have a reservation for me. The name is Sterling.
Hotel Receptionist: Ah, yes. Mr. and Mrs. Sterling, booked from Cairo.
James Bond: That's right.
Hotel Receptionist: We have Suite A5 for you. A sitting room - and two bedrooms.
James Bond: [to Anya] Moneypenny being a little over efficient.
James Bond: We don't make mistakes of that sort.
Major Anya Amasova: You sound just like a Russian.
James Bond: In my country, Major, the condemned man is usually allowed a final request.
Major Anya Amasova: Granted.
James Bond: Let's get out of these wet things.
James Bond: He's on our records. A professional killer.
Major Anya Amasova: Called Jaws.
[after structure falls on Jaws]
James Bond: Egyptian builders.
[Anya trying to shift gears]
James Bond: Can you play any other tune?
[a camera globe moves through the holding bay, examining the USS Wayne crew]
James Bond: [to Anya] Don't look up. You're on Candid Camera.
Q: Good morning 007.
James Bond: Morning Q.
Q: Mission successful?
James Bond: On and off.
James Bond: [Bond walks into a Greek Confessional Booth] Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
Q: [Removing disguise] That's putting it mildly, 007!
Q: Your signal sent Whitehall into shock. So far, we have managed to locate 439 St. Cyril's in Greece. Heaven only knows to which one Kristatos took the ATAC.
James Bond: I know a well-informed person to contact about that, Q.
James Bond: The Chinese have a saying; "Before setting off on revenge, you first dig *two* graves"!
Melina: I don't expect you to understand, you're English, but I'm half Greek and Greek women like Elektra always avenge their loved ones!
Bibi: Him? He thinks I'm still a virgin.
James Bond: Yes. Well, you get your clothes on... and I'll buy you an ice cream.
James Bond: You left this with Ferrara, I believe.
[kicks the car, making it fall from the mountain and therefore killing Locque]
James Bond: He had no head for heights.
[Blofeld dangles from a helicopter]
Blofeld: Put me down! Put me down!
James Bond: Oh, you want to get off?
[Bond drops Blofeld down a giant smokestack]
Columbo: You may need this.
[returns Bond's pistol to him]
Columbo: I'm a good judge of man. You have what the Greeks call "thrausos" - guts!
James Bond: [points his gun at Columbo] So have you, Mister Columbo.
James Bond: I love a drive in the country. Don't you...?
James Bond: Courage is no match for an unfriendly shoe, Countess...
Bibi: That's a laugh. Everyone knows it builds up muscle tone.
James Bond: Well, how about you build up a little more muscle tone by putting on your clothes?
Bibi: Don't you like me?
James Bond: [wearily] Why, I think you're wonderful, Bibi... But I don't think your uncle Aris would approve.
Bibi: [scoffs] Him? He thinks I'm still a virgin.
James Bond: Yes, well...
[to Gen. Gogol, after throwing the ATAC system over a cliff]
James Bond: That's detente, comrade; *You* don't have it, *I* don't have it.
[Gen. Gogol laughs]
Melina: You know what I'd like?
James Bond: I can't imagine.
Melina: A moonlight swim.
Frederick Gray: [Calling on Bond's wristwatch phone] 007, are you there? Bond? Bond? Bond, are you there? Bond?
Melina: [to Bond] For your eyes only, darling.
[Melina drops her robe to the ground leaving her completely naked]
James Bond: [after mauling Bond with kisses] Don't you ever come up for air?
Bibi: That's why I'll win the gold medal. Breath control.
James Bond: Yes, well... you can't lose!
Vicar: Mr. Bond, Mr. Bond. I'm so glad I caught you. Your office called. They're sending a helicopter to pick you up. Some sort of emergency.
James Bond: It usually is. Thank you.
James Bond: [after the ski chase] I took the scenic route.
James Bond: A nose, Q, not a banana.
James Bond: All right, keep your hair on!
[to Melinda, who drives the CitroÃ«n 2CV]
James Bond: Take the low road!
[Melinda steers to the right and the 2CV hits a curve and literally tips over, ending up on its roof]
James Bond: Not that low!
James Bond: What did Columbo whisper to you at the restaurant?
Countess: That you were a spy, and to find out more about you.
James Bond: And have you?
Countess: Have I *ever*.
Tanner: You were supposed to question Gonzales, not let Miss Havelock perforate him!
James Bond: I quite agree, sir.
Frederick Gray: I'm afraid we have to inform the Prime Minister that Operation Undertow is dead in the water. Why... she'll have our guts for garters!
Kristatos: The odds favour standing *pat*...
James Bond: *If* you play the odds!
James Bond: Now, if we could identify that 'someone'...
Tanner: Why don't you try the identigraph?
Frederick Gray: Mmm!
James Bond: Yes, sir.
Tanner: Well get cracking, 007!
Frederick Gray: Mmm!
James Bond: [Bewildered] Minister...
James Bond: I'm afraid we're being out-horse-powered!
James Bond: Yasso!
James Bond: [after a shark swims past them] I hope he was dining alone!
James Bond: Oh, by the way, we haven't been properly introduced, Melina. My name is Bond, James Bond.
James Bond: Bond, James Bond.
James Bond: If I don't report in by tomorrow, not only will my people, but the entire Greek police, will come down on you like a load of bricks.
Columbo: By tomorrow, we'll be good friends. Let us drink to that.
James Bond: I'll wait until tomorrow.
Columbo: [after playing the recorded conversation of Kristatos and Bond] I'm here, Mr. Bond of the British Secret Service. But I'll tell you it is Kristatos you want, NOT me. He told you about himself. He's the one with the powerful connections. Locque works for him, not me. I smuggle, yes. I smuggle gold, diamonds, cigarettes, pistachio nuts... but no heroin.
Columbo: Sit down. That I leave to him. When he is not too busy working for Russia, against my country and yours.
James Bond: My country awarded him the King's Medal.
Columbo: Yes, I know. But other people died for it. During the fighting in Crete, he was a double agent. King's Medal. Ha. I would laugh if my heart was not so heavy about my poor Lisl.
James Bond: What does Kristatos gain by setting you up?
Columbo: Well, I know too much about him. He wants me out of the way. By using a British agent to do his dirty work for him, your government might give him another medal.
James Bond: Why should I believe you?
Columbo: I'll prove it to you tonight. We'll go together to his warehouse in Albania. Okay?
James Bond: If I don't report in by morning, not only my people, but the entire Greek police will be down on you Iike a load of bricks.
Columbo: Don't worry. By tomorrow, we'll be good friends. Let us drink to that.
James Bond: I'll wait till tomorrow.
Columbo: [Handing Bond back his gun] You may need this. I'm a good judge of men. Mr. Bond, you have what the Greeks call tha'ros. Guts.
James Bond: So have you, Mr. Columbo.
Miss Moneypenny: James!
James Bond: Moneypenny, a feast for my eyes!
Miss Moneypenny: What about the rest of you?
James Bond: Well, I was going to get around to that.
Tanner: 007, try not to muck it up again.
James Bond: I'll do my best, sir.
James Bond: Don't they have showers at the ice rink? How did you get in here?
Bibi: [Gets into Bond's bed] One of the porter's is a fan. He'll do anything for me. And I'll do anything for you.
James Bond: Well, I'm exceedingly flattered, Bibi. But you're in training.
Bibi: That's a laugh. Everybody knows it builds up muscle tone.
Bibi: There's Eric Kriegler!
James Bond: The East German champion?
Bibi: Isn't he beautiful?
James Bond: You know something, Bibi, you're fickle.
Greek Casino Waiter: ApÃ©ritif, please?
James Bond: Ouzo for me, please.
James Bond: This may be an opportunity.
Kristatos: This may be a trap.
James Bond: If you play the odds.
James Bond: Allow me. May I drive you home?
Countess: No. Thank you. I'll take a taxi.
James Bond: No courage? Seriously, you may have a job finding one this time of night.
Countess: Well, you look like a gentleman. Why not?
James Bond: May I call on you tomorrow, Countess?
Countess: I'm a night person. I have champagne and oysters in the fridge. Why not come in for a bite?
Countess: [Raises her champagne glass] Cheers!
James Bond: Bottom's up.
Countess: Whoops! Me nighty's slipping.
James Bond: So is your accent, Countess. Manchester?
Countess: Close, Liverpool.
Melina: I didn't think it would end like this.
James Bond: We're not dead yet. Hold tight.
James Bond: The Chinese have a saying: "When setting out on revenge, you first dig two graves".
Melina: I didn't expect you to understand, you're English. But I'm Half-Greek. And Greek Women, like Electra, always avenge their loved ones.
Solitaire: [Kananga has just died from the gas pellet shoved in his mouth] Where's Kananga?
James Bond: He always did have an inflated opinion of himself.
Rosie Carver: [James and Rosie lying on a picnic blanket kissing] Oh, James. Ooh you don't know what finding you has meant to me.
James Bond: Oh I can imagine. And you've no idea what finding this has meant to me.
[James shows her a Queen of Cups tarot card that Solitiare sent him]
James Bond: You do know what the Queen of Cups means in an upside down position? A deceitful, perverse woman. A liar, a cheat, and I'd like some answers now.
Rosie Carver: Please... uh... You don't understand, sir. They'll kill me if I do.
James Bond: [James Bond produces his gun and points it at Rosie] And I'll kill you if you don't.
Rosie Carver: But you couldn't. You wouldn't. Not after what we just done.
James Bond: Well, I certainly wouldn't have killed you before.
M: I'm sure the over-burdened British taxpayer would be fascinated to know how its Special Ordinances section disperses its funds. In future, Commander, let me suggest a perfectly adequate watchmaker just down the street.
[Bond activates the watch magnet, drawing to it M's spoon]
M: Good God!
James Bond: You see, sir. By pulling out this button, it turns the watch into a hyper-intensified magnetic field. Powerful enough to even deflect the path of a bullet - at long range, or so Q claims...
M: I feel very tempted to test that theory right now!
Tee-Hee: [leaving Bond stranded on an island surrounded by crocodiles] There are two ways to disable a crocodile you know.
James Bond: I... don't suppose you'd care to share that information with me?
Tee-Hee: One way is to take a pencil, and jam it into the pressure hole behind his eye.
James Bond: And the other?
Tee-Hee: Oh the other's twice as simple. You just put your hand in his mouth... and pull his teeth out! Heh, heh!
[as Bond unzips Miss Caruso's dress with the magnet in his watch]
Miss Caruso: Such a delicate touch.
James Bond: Sheer magnetism, darling.
[after Bond and Solitaire narrowly escape from Mr. Big's henchmen]
James Bond: Now where would you like to go?
[Solitaire lays down on a cot]
Solitaire: Anywhere where we can find one of these.
Cab driver: Hey, you know where you're goin', man?
James Bond: Uptown, I believe?
Cab driver: Uptown? You headed into Harlem, man!
James Bond: Well you just stay on the tail of that jukebox and there's an extra twenty in it for you.
Cab driver: Hey man, for twenty bucks I'd take you to a Ku Klux Klan cookout!
James Bond: Same time tomorrow, Mrs. Bell?
Rosie Carver: There's a...
James Bond: Oh, a snake. I forgot, I should have told you. You should never go in there without a mongoose.
Solitaire: [She has just beaten James at Gin Rummy] James, what are you doing?
James Bond: Just testing an old adage: "Unlucky at cards..."
[Bond removes prosthetic arm from train window]
Solitaire: Now what are you doing?
James Bond: Just being disarming, darling.
James Bond: [When Tee-Hee is unable to undo James Bond's wrist watch with his metal arm] Butter hook!
James Bond: Black Queen on the red King, Miss...
James Bond: My name's Bond, James Bond.
Solitaire: I know who you are, what you are, and why you've come. You have made a mistake. You will not succeed.
James Bond: [exchanging his gun with Whisper for a drink] Keep the change.
Mr. Big: [to his men] Is *this* the stupid mutha that tailed you uptown?
James Bond: There seems to be some mistake. My name is...
Mr. Big: Names is for tombstones, baby! Y'all take this honky out and waste him! Now!
[Bond has just explained the first two Lover's Lessons to Solitaire]
Solitaire: Is there time before we leave, for lesson number 3?
James Bond: [undressing] Absolutely. There's no sense going out half-cocked.
Mr. Big: I got my own plans for you, baby. But, first, there's one little question that he wants answered for him.
James Bond: In that case, you better ship me back to the island and let him ask in person. I'm not in the habit of giving answers to... lackeys.
Mr. Big: You damn lucky you got an ear left to hear the question with! Which is, did you mess with that?
[pointing to Solitaire's breasts]
James Bond: That's between Solitaire and myself... and Kanaga. I'll tell him when I see him.
Mr. Big: You ain't gonna see the sunlight unless you answer me!
James Bond: [sarcastic] Oh, I had no idea that you are so frightened of him!
Mr. Big: Did you touch her?
James Bond: [firmly] WHEN I see Kananga!
Mr. Big: Right!
[as Kananga reveals himself from a latex mask]
James Bond: Quite revealing!
[after finding the hat in the cabin, Rosie looks fearful, but James tries to console her]
James Bond: Don't worry darling, its just a small hat, belonging to a man of limited means, who lost a fight with a chicken.
Rosie Carver: It's a warning! GET IT OUT OF HERE!
[Felix is on the phone with Mr. Bleeker after Bond totals one of his planes while running from Kananga's men at New Orleans Airport. Bond asks how Mrs. Bell, the old woman in the plane with him, is doing after the ordeal]
James Bond: How is Mrs. Bell?
Felix Leiter: [Covering the mouthpiece of the telephone] Intensive care, but she'll pull through.
Mr. Big: What shall we drink to, Mr. Bond?
James Bond: [as the overweight Whisper approaches with drinks] Well, how about an earthquake?
Whisper: [barely audible] Your champagne, sir.
James Bond: What?
Whisper: [slightly louder] Your champagne!
James Bond: [takes a moment to realize what Whisper's saying] Oh! Just put it on the table over there, will you?
Whisper: [whispering] Shall I open it?
James Bond: Hmm?
Whisper: [louder] Shall I open it?
James Bond: Oh, no, I can take care of that.
[hands Whisper money]
Whisper: Thank you.
[during the tense interrogation scene over Solitaire]
Kananga: Solitaire... my dear. I need you to listen to me very carefully. On the back of Mr. Bond's wristwatch, the registration number is 3266. Do I speak the truth?
[after a tense moment, Solitaire carefully lifts up a tarot card and looks at it]
Solitaire: [nervous] You speak the truth.
[there is another long and tense pause as Kananga glares at Solitaire then back at Bond with his back turned. Not reacting or even blinking, Kananga gesters a command to Tee-Hee who removes his metal claw from Mr. Bond's right hand and also removes his restraints. A relieved Bond stands up from his chair as Kananga, still quiet, tosses his wristwatch back to Bond who puts it back on]
James Bond: Well, if there's nothing else I guess I've laid your fears to rest. My compliments on a splended operation. There is one thing however that...
[suddenly and without warning Tee-Hee knocks out Bond with his prosthetic metal arm. Whisper then walks in from another room]
Kananga: Whisper, take him to the farm.
[Tee-Hee walks out and Whisper, picking up the unconscious Bond, leaves the room, leaving Kananga and Solitaire alone]
James Bond: Harold Stutter, CIA, where were you when I didn't need you?
Harold Strutter: Quite obvious you weren't getting out front, not even with that clever disguise you're wearing.
James Bond: Huh?
Harold Strutter: White face in Harlem. Good thinkin' Bond. Let's get outta here.
James Bond: I'm surprised they didn't spot you, too. There's a most remarkable girl back there with a deck of cards.
Harold Strutter: I saw those cards on the way up. Spades, James, every one. You were nailed the minute you left 74.
James Bond: Voodooland was just poppy fields. A simple matter of heroin smuggling.
James Bond: Are you sure this is the way to New Orleans?
Cab driver: I don't know! But, it shore beats the hell outta Harlem. Don't it? Well, hello, Jim! What's happenin', baby? Just ease back now, Jim. Relax! Mr. Big wants to see you.
James Bond: Miss Moneypenny, thank you.
Moneypenny: Goodbye, James. Or, should I say - Ciao, bello!
James Bond: Room service, this is Mr. Bond, bungalow 12. I'd like a bottle of Bollinger, please. Slightly chilled. Two glasses.
Rosie Carver: Oh, I should have never gotten into any of this! I'm going to be completely useless to you.
James Bond: Well, I'm sure we'll be able to lick you into shape.
Solitaire: I've lost it! The high priestess, his wife to the prince no longer of this world. The spiritual bridge to the secret church. Is my fate. By compelling me to earthly love, the gods themselves have taken away my powers.
James Bond: Darling, I've got a small confession to make now. Try not to be too upset. The deck was slightly stacked to my favor.
Solitaire: It makes no difference. The physical violation cannot be undone.
James Bond: All I have to do before we leave is - what goes on back there in voodooland.
James Bond: Bourbon, no ice, please.
Felix Leiter: Two sazeracs. Where's your sense of adventure James? This is New Orleans. Relax.
Kananga: The question still stands, Mr. Bond, asked by the gentleman concerned - did you touch her?
James Bond: Well, its not the sort of question a gentleman answers.
James Bond: Quite ingenious. A sort of junkies welfare system.
Kananga: Well, mainly until the number of addicts in the country has doubled, shall we say. Then I will begin to market that acreage that you blundered into the other day. That heroin will be very expensive, in deed. Later myself and the phone company will be the only the two going monopolies in this nation - for *years* to come.
James Bond: And I thought it was Solitaire that did the fortune telling.
James Bond: Oh, an underground monorail - connected to the last refugee of a scoundrel, no doubt.
James Bond: Thanks for everything Felix. I'll see you tomorrow night at the 21 Club and don't be late.
Felix Leiter: I still don't see why you want to travel this way. I mean, what the hell can the two of you do on the train for 16 hours?
James Bond: [Solitaire smiles] Say goodbye to Felix, darling.
[James Bond's first scene, winning a game of chemin-de-fer]
James Bond: I admire your courage, Miss...?
Sylvia Trench: Trench. Sylvia Trench. I admire your luck, Mr...?
James Bond: Bond. James Bond.
[Professor Dent tries to kill Bond, but his gun is out of bullets]
James Bond: That's a Smith & Wesson, and you've had your six.
[shoots Dent twice]
Dr. No: The Americans are fools. I offered my services, they refused. So did the East. Now they can both pay for their mistake.
James Bond: World domination. The same old dream. Our asylums are full of people who think they're Naploeon. Or God.
Miss Moneypenny: James! Where have you been? I've been searching all over London for you.
[Picks up phone]
Miss Moneypenny: 007 is here sir.
[Slaps Bond's hand away from the papers on her desk]
James Bond: Moneypenny! What gives?
Miss Moneypenny: Me, given an ounce of encouragement. You've never taken me to dinner looking like this. You've never taken me to dinner...
James Bond: I would, you know. Only "M" would have me court-martialed for... illegal use of government property.
Miss Moneypenny: Flattery will get you nowhere - but don't stop trying.
Dr. No: I'm a member of SPECTRE.
James Bond: SPECTRE?
Dr. No: SPECTRE. Special Executive for Counter Intelligence, Terrorism, Revenge, Extortion. The four great cornerstones of power headed by the greatest brains in the world.
James Bond: Correction, criminal brains.
Dr. No: The successful criminal brain is always superior. It has to be.
Sylvia Trench: When did you say you had to leave?
James Bond: Immediately... almost immediately.
James Bond: Good evening, sir.
M: It happens to be 3 a.m. When do you sleep, 007?
James Bond: Never on the firm's time, sir.
James Bond: Don't worry. I'm not supposed to be here either. Are you alone?
Honey Ryder: What are you doing here? Are you looking for shells?
James Bond: No, I'm just looking.
Honey Ryder: Stay where you are.
James Bond: I promise you, I won't steal your shells.
Honey Ryder: I promise you, you won't either.
[Bond moves closer. Honey pulls out her dagger]
Honey Ryder: Stay where you are!
James Bond: I can assure you, my intentions are strictly honorable.
Dr. No: [to Bond] I was curious to see what kind of man you were. I thought there may be even a place for you with SPECTRE.
James Bond: I'm flattered. I'd prefer the Revenge department. Of course, my first job would be finding the man who killed Strangways and Quarrel.
James Bond: Tell me Miss Trench, do you play any other games?
[Showing prisoners Bond and Honey around their cell]
Sister Lily: Don't hesitate to ring if there's anything else you want. Anything at all.
James Bond: Two air tickets to London?
[Honey describes how she killed the man who had raped her]
Honey Ryder: I put a black widow spider underneath his mosquito net... a female, they're the worst. It took him a whole week to die.
[Bond looks shocked]
Honey Ryder: Did I do wrong?
James Bond: Well, it wouldn't do to make a habit of it.
James Bond: Tell me, does the toppling of American missiles really compensate for having no hands?
James Bond: One takes cyanide, another would let her arm be broken, neither will talk. Who puts that sort of fear into people?
[Bond pulls up to the front of Government House with a dead man sitting up in the backseat]
James Bond: Sergeant, make sure he doesn't get away.
Honey Ryder: How can you eat at a time like this?
James Bond: I'm hungry. We don't know when we'll get the chance to eat again. Here, take this.
James Bond: [whispering] Careful. The whole place is probably wired for sound.
James Bond: Now, don't worry, Quarrel. Everything's going to be fine.
Quarrel: You say so, Captain. Bottom part of where my belly used to be tells me different.
James Bond: For me, Crab Key's going to be a gentle relaxation.
Felix Leiter: From what? Dames?
James Bond: No, from being a clay pigeon.
[Bond admires a huge aquarium. Dr. No enters]
Dr. No: One million dollars, Mr. Bond. You were wondering what it cost.
James Bond: As a matter of fact, I was.
James Bond: Both hands on the wheel, Mr. Jones, I'm a very nervous passenger.
Miss Taro: What should I say to an invitation from a strange gentleman?
James Bond: You should say yes.
Miss Taro: [shaking her head] I should say maybe.
Construction Worker: [Hearse chasing Bond drives off a cliff] How did it happen?
James Bond: I think they were on their way to a funeral.
Dr. No: That's a Dom Perignon '55, it would be a pity to break it
James Bond: I prefer the '53 myself...
Major Boothroyd: [to M, referring to Bond's Beretta] Nice and light... in a lady's handbag.
M: Any comment, 007?
James Bond: I disagree, sir. I've carried the Beretta for ten years, and I've never missed with it.
M: No, but it jameed on you last job, and you spent six months in hospital in consequence. When you carry a 00 number, you have a license to kill, not get killed. Furthermore, since I've been head of MI7
[sic - MI6]
M: there's been a forty percent drop in casualties, and I want to keep it that way. From now on you carry the Walther... unless you'd rather return to standard intelligence duties.
James Bond: No sir, I would not.
M: [to Boothroyd] Show him, Armourer.
Major Boothroyd: [to Bond] Walther PPK, 7.65 millimeter, with a delivery like a brick through a plate-glass window. The American CIA swear by them.
James Bond: [Bond has overpowered Mr Jones on an isolated road] Now talk!
Jones: [Breathlessly] Alright! Let me have a cigarette.
Jones: [Bond gives him the packet of cigarettes. Jones starts gasping for air. Bond grabs him] To hell with you!
Dr. No: [about his aquarium] The glass is convex, 10 inches thick, which accounts for the magnifying effect.
James Bond: Minnows pretending they're whales. Just like you on this island, Dr. No.
Dr. No: It depends, Mr. Bond, on which side of the glass you are.
James Bond: You believe in living dangerously. I can see that.
Miss Taro: What do you mean?
James Bond: Sitting around with wet hair, you'll die of pneumonia
Honey Ryder: How well do you know about animals? Did you ever see a mongoose dance? Or, a scorpion with sunstroke sting itself to death? Or, a praying mantis eat her husband after making love?
James Bond: I hate to admit it, but, I haven't.
Honey Ryder: Well, I have.
Dr. No: A medium dry martini, lemon peel, shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: Vodka?
Dr. No: Of course.
Honey Ryder: Have you any idea what they'll do with us?
James Bond: No idea. No door handles or windows, either.
Honey Ryder: It's a prison, then.
James Bond: Mink-lined, with first-class service.
[James and Honey are marooned in a boat in the middle of the ocean. A Coast Guard boat carrying Leiter appears]
James Bond: Well, hello! What are you doing here? Do you need help?
[Honey stands up in the boat]
Felix Leiter: I'm quite sure you don't.
Hotel Valet: One medium dry Vodka Martini, mixed like you said, sir, and not stirred.
James Bond: Thank you.
James Bond: I'm a friend of Commander Strangways.
Quarrel: Now, ain't that nice. I like people who's friends of people.
James Bond: Where did you take him on your boat.
Quarrel: You see that, Captain. That there's the Caribbean. That's where. Fishing.
Felix Leiter: Felix Leiter, Central Intelligence Agency. You must be James Bond.
James Bond: You mean we're fighting the same war?
James Bond: Crab Key begins to interest me. What else do we know about this Chinese gentleman?
Felix Leiter: Nothing much, except his name: Dr. No.
James Bond: That's a naughty little habit. Listening at keyholes?
James Bond: Are you ready, Honey?
Honey Ryder: I suppose so.
Honey Ryder: I'm glad your hands are sweating too.
James Bond: Of course, I'm scared too.
Miss Taro: What's going on behind my back?
James Bond: Look, no hands!
[the morning after Bond sleeps with May Day]
Max Zorin: You slept well?
James Bond: A little restless but I got off eventually.
Howe: What have they done?
Max Zorin: You discharged her, so she and her accomplice came here to kill you. Then they set fire to the office, to conceal the crime but they were trapped in the elevator and perished in the flames.
Howe: But that means I would have to be...
Max Zorin: Dead!
Max Zorin: That's rather neat, Don't you think?
James Bond: Brilliant. I'm almost speechless with admiration.
Max Zorin: Intuitive improvisation is the secret of genius.
James Bond: Herr Doktor Mortner would be proud of his creation.
[Zorin is going to kill Bond]
James Bond: My department knows I'm here. When I don't report they'll retaliate.
Max Zorin: If you're the best they've got, they're more likely to try and cover up your embarrassing incompetence.
James Bond: Don't count on it, Zorin.
Max Zorin: [laughs] Ha ha, you amuse me, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: It's not mutual.
James Bond: Well my dear, I take it you spend quite a lot of time in the saddle.
Jenny Flex: Yes, I love an early morning ride.
James Bond: Well, I'm an early riser myself.
U.S. Police Captain: You're under arrest.
Stacey Sutton: Wait a minute, this is James Stock of the London Financial times.
James Bond: Well, actually, captain, I'm with the British Secret Service. The name is Bond, James Bond.
U.S. Police Captain: Is he?
Stacey Sutton: Are you?
James Bond: Yes.
U.S. Police Captain: And I'm Dick Tracy and you're still under arrest!
James Bond: Taxi!
Paris Taxi Driver: No, no, no English!
James Bond: [Pulling him from the car] Out!
Tibbett, Sir Godfrey: Another wealthy owner?
James Bond: Who knows? But she certainly bares closer inspection.
Tibbett, Sir Godfrey: We're on a mission.
James Bond: Sir Godfrey, on a mission, I am expected to sacrifice myself!
Jenny Flex: Welcome, sir. I'm Jenny Flex.
James Bond: Of course you are.
James Bond: Hello. I thought you might like to join the party. By the way, the name is James St. John Smythe. I'm English.
Stacey Sutton: I never would have guessed.
Restaurant guest: Qu'est-ce qu'il y a, monsieur?
James Bond: There's a fly in his soup!
Scarpine: He's the outstanding horse of the sales. We expect him to fetch over three million dollars!
James Bond: Oh, sounds quite reasonable!
[Bond is released from jail in Paris for violating the Napoleonic Code]
M: [to Bond] May I remind you that this operation was to be conducted discreetly. All it took was six million Francs in damages and penalties for violating most of the Napoleonic Code.
James Bond: Well, under the circumstances, sir, I thought it MORE IMPORTANT to identify the assassin.
M: What did you learn from Aubergine before his untimely demise?
James Bond: [to M] Well, only that Zorin is having a thoroughbred sale at his stud farm not far from here. I think I should be there.
James Bond: Can you help me with that, Sir Godfrey?
Sir Godfrey Tibbett: It may be possible to arrange an invitation. It's a bit short notice, but I might just be able to squeeze you in, Bond.
James Bond: [to Tibbett] Thank you, sir.
[May Day walks into her room and finds Bond naked in her bed]
James Bond: May Day, where have you been? I've been waiting for you... to take care of me, personally.
[Zorin nods to May Day, and she enters silently in the room]
James Bond: I see you're a woman of very few words.
May Day: What's there to say?
Q: She must take a lot of vitamins!
James Bond: Yes, and perhaps Pegasus does too.
Max Zorin: You lost, 007.
James Bond: [after looking at Tibbett's body] Killing Tibbett was a mistake.
Max Zorin: Then I'm about to make that same mistake twice.
[Bond is gettting ready to have a horse race with Zorin]
James Bond: And what if I'm thrown?
Max Zorin: Then you lose.
James Bond: I take it you ride.
Max Zorin: I'm happiest in the saddle.
James Bond: A fellow sportsman. So, what about fishing? Fly-casting?
Max Zorin: [realizes he's been trapped] I'm neglecting my other guests. Enjoy yourself, you'll find the young ladies stimulating company.
[Bond is dangling from an unlocked fire engine ladder]
James Bond: Turn!
James Bond: Not this way! That way!
May Day: Somebody will take care of you.
James Bond: Oh, you'll see to that personally, will you?
Mine Foreman: [sees Bond disguised as a fireman] Where's the fire?
James Bond: [American accent] In your rear end!
Kimberley Jones: [First lines] I thought you'd never get back.
James Bond: Well, there was a heck of a crowd on the piste!
Kimberley Jones: So I see. Mission accomplished?
James Bond: Best beluga.
James Bond: Vodka, rather shaken, and one microchip.
Kimberley Jones: Good. I'll send a signal to M.
James Bond: Be a good girl would you, and put her on automatic. And we could do with a couple of glasses.
Kimberley Jones: They're in the overhead rack.
[Bond pulls a lever and Kimberley falls on the sofa with him]
Kimberley Jones: Commander Bond.
James Bond: [Bond unzips her outfit] Call me James. It's five days to Alaska.
[they start kissing]
James Bond: What's this thing loaded with?
Stacey Sutton: Rock salt.
James Bond: Now you tell me!
Pola Ivanova: James, that night in London when I was with the Bolshoi...
James Bond: Ah, what a performance.
Pola Ivanova: In my dressing room, later, did you know I was an agent with orders to seduce you?
James Bond: Why do you think I sent you three dozen *red* roses?
Pola Ivanova: Mmm. Now, that *was* a performance.
Pola Ivanova: Long time no see, James...!
Pola Ivanova: ... Oh, you haven't changed a bit!
James Bond: Well, YOU have. You're even LOVELIER.
[Bond and Aubergine are discussing the use of steriods in Zorin's horses]
James Bond: Tell me, why do Zorin's horses beat others with far superior bloodlines?
Aubergine: This is a mystery.
James Bond: Could he be using drugs?
Aubergine: Nothing showed up in the tests.
[a mystery person is seen entering the room]
Aubergine: Later this month, Zorin will hold his annual sales at his stud farm near Paris. Security is formidable.
[the mystery person attacks another person dressed in black. The butterflies in the room go stir crazy]
Aubergine: But the key to this mystery is there. And I, Achille Aubergine, will intend to find it.
[We get a good look at the eyes of the mystery person. Aubergine is suddenly stabbed in the cheek with a hook and his head falls to the table]
[At Stacey Sutton's home, Bond cooks dinner; pulls out a excellent quiche from the oven]
James Bond: Et voilÃ . Quiche des Cabinet.
Stacey Sutton: Sounds interesting. Mmm. What is it?
James Bond: An omelet.
James Bond: Now, you were telling me about your grandfather.
Stacey Sutton: He left Sutton Oil to Dad, who expected me, as the only child, to take it over someday. So, at college, I studied geology.
James Bond: And then what happened?
Stacey Sutton: Zorin. He took over Sutton Oil on a rigged proxy fight. I fought him in the courts. It's taken everything I had: all the cash, all the furniture, everything. So I took this job as state geologist. And I've just managed to hold on to this house and-and my shares.
James Bond: Well, that's what the $5 million were for, your shares?
Stacey Sutton: Ten times more than they're worth. Just, uh...
[grabs the check]
Stacey Sutton: just drop the lawsuit and shut my mouth. I haven't accepted yet.
James Bond: So Zorin sent along his gorillas to help you make up your mind.
Stacey Sutton: They have.
[tears up the check; sighs]
Stacey Sutton: I'd sell everything and live in a tent before I give up.
James Bond: I'll fill you in later, Moneypenny.
M: Now that we're all here, you can get on with the briefing, Q.
Q: Very good, sir. Gentlemen, a silicon integrated circuit. The essential part of all modern computers.
M: No lecture, Q. We're all aware of the usefulness of the microchip.
Q: Well, now, until recently, all microchips were susceptible to damage from the intense magnetic pulse of a nuclear explosion.
M: Magnetic pulse?
James Bond: Yes, Minister. I burst in outer space over the UK and everything with a microchip in it, from, well, the modern toaster to the most sophisticated computers in our defense systems would we rendered absolutely useless.
Q: One of our private defense contractors came up with this: a chip totally impervious to magnetic pulse damage. Now, if I place it on the micro-comparator and compare it with a chip that Commander Bond recovered from the body of 003 in Siberia, when I bring the two images together...
James Bond: They're identical. The KGB must have pipeline into that research company.
James Bond: With the cane, is that Max Zorin?
M: Yes. Born in Dresden. Fled from East Germany in the 60s. Changed passport. Speaks at least five languages, no accent. Now, the talk of the city and the bourse.
James Bond: The old rags to riches story.
M: He made his first fortune in oil and gas, James. Now, second in electronics and high tech.
James Bond: Bollinger '75.
Aubergine: I see you are a connoisseur, Monsieur Bond.
James Bond: Excellent choice.
Aubergine: I am pleased you approve, since you are paying the bill. Cheers.
James Bond: SantÃ©, Monsieur Aubergine.
James Bond: By the way, the name is St. John Smythe, James St. John Smythe.
Dr. Carl Mortner: Dr. Carl Mortner, at your service.
James Bond: Mortner?
Chuck Lee: Got a real winner here. His name is actually Hans Glaub - the German pioneer who developed steroids.
James Bond: That ties him to the horse injection.
Chuck Lee: During World War II he experimented with steroids on pregnant women in the concentration camps in an attempt to enhance intelligence.
James Bond: With any success?
Chuck Lee: Eventually every mother aborted - though a handful of children were produced with phenomenal IQs. But there was a side effect - they were psychotics .
James Bond: Was this Mortner - or Glaub, tried by the war crimes commission?
Chuck Lee: The Russians grabbed him. Set him up in a laboratory. He spent several years developing steroids for their athletes.
James Bond: Pola Ivanova!
Pola Ivanova: James Bond!
Pola Ivanova: DÃ©tente can be beautiful.
James Bond: This is no time - to be discussing - politics.
Howe: [Bond posing as a London Financial Times reporter] If you'd like any further information, just call me, Mr, eh?
James Bond: Stock, James Stock. Thank you Mr. Howe.
Stacey Sutton: I'm Stacey - Sutton. And you're a reporter. Eh, what was it?
James Bond: Stock, James Stock.
Stacey Sutton: I only have a few leftovers in the fridge. I'm a pathetic cook.
James Bond: Well, I'll lend a hand.
Stacey Sutton: You can cook?
James Bond: I've been known to dabble.
James Bond: It's women's lib. They're taking over the teamsters.
James Bond: I should take a closer look at that mine.
Stacey Sutton: What's stopping you?
James Bond: Will you keep still!
Stacey Sutton: Do you know what I'm sitting on?
James Bond: I'm trying not to think about it.
James Bond: Stacey, are you there?
Stacey Sutton: You betcha!
James Bond: [to the camera] This never happened to the other fellow.
James Bond: [Tracy has just been shot and killed] It's all right. It's quite all right, really. She's having a rest. We'll be going on soon. There's no hurry, you see. We have all the time in the world.
[a bad guy chasing Bond skis into a snow blower, which then spews red snow]
James Bond: He had a lot of guts.
[after Blofeld hits a tree]
James Bond: He's branched off.
Draco: My apologies for the way you were brought here. I wasn't sure you'd accept a *formal* invitation.
James Bond: There's always something formal about the point of a pistol.
[Bond throws a knife and hits a calendar on a bookshelf, on the 14th day]
Draco: But today is the thirteenth, Commander.
James Bond: I'm superstitious.
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: Merry Christmas, 007.
James Bond: [as Hillary Bray] I'm Sir Hillary Bray.
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: No no no, Mr. Bond. Respectable baronets from the College of Heralds do "not" seduce female patients in clinics. On the other hand, they do get their professional details... "right". The De Bleauchamps tombs are "not" in the Augsburg Cathedral as you said, but in the Ste. Anna Kirch. Sir Hillary Bray would have known!
[Bond looks down and sighs, finally aware that he has been made]
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: [beat] Small slip. It takes more than a few props to turn 007 into a Herald.
[breaks Bond's glasses]
James Bond: [normal voice] It'll take more than cutting off your earlobes, Blofeld, to turn you into a Count.
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: I may yet suprise you. But I'm afraid you have no more suprises left for me. I know all about your mission, Mr. Bond.
[Blofeld throws Campbell's mountain climbing equipment at the floor]
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: Your colleague! Such a keen climber, and a brilliant conversationalist... before he left us.
James Bond: You realize that he reported where I am.
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: Oh, I doubt that. In any case, no one is coming to your rescue, Mr. Bond. In a few short hours, the United Nations will receive a Yultide greeting. The information that I now possess the scientific means to control, or to destroy, the economy of the whole world. People will have more important things to deal with than you.
Draco: She likes you, I can see it.
James Bond: You must give me the name of your oculist.
Sir Hilary Bray: Our methods are very exacting. We never like to speak until we're *absolutely* certain that there can be no possibility of error on our side or... forgery on anyone else's.
James Bond: I hope I can live up to your high standards.
Tracy: You're hurting me.
James Bond: I thought that was the idea for tonight.
Tracy: Why do you persist in rescuing me, Mr. Bond?
James Bond: It's becoming quite a habit, isn't it, Contessa Teresa?
Tracy: Teresa was a Saint; I'm known as Tracy.
James Bond: Well, Tracy, next time play it safe and stand on 5.
Tracy: People who want to stay *alive* play it safe.
James Bond: Please, stay alive! At least for tonight.
Tracy: [Throws down her hotel room key and gets up to leave] Come later.
[Draco proposes that Bond marries his daughter]
James Bond: I find her fascinating. But, she needs a psychiatrist, not me.
Draco: [abruptly] What she needs is a man... to *dominate* her! To make love to her enough to make her love him! A man like you!
[a girl writes on Bond's leg under the table, to which Bond makes an awkward face]
Irma Bunt: Is anything ze matter, Sir Hilary?
James Bond: Just a slight stiffness coming on... due to the altitude, no doubt.
[M refuses to authorize an attack on Blofeld]
James Bond: And the girl who helped me escape? We just leave her there?
M: This department is not concerned with your personal problems.
James Bond: This department owes her a *debt*. She saved my life.
M: Operation Bedlam is DEAD! Do you understand, 007?
James Bond: Yes, Sir. I understand.
[Bond is secretly asking Draco for assistance]
James Bond: I'd like to interest you in a demolition deal that requires certain aerial activity to install equipment.
[Bond has realized what Blofeld is really up to]
James Bond: Allergy vaccines? Bacteria. Bacteriological Warfare.
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: With a difference. Our big breakthrough since last summer has been the confection of a certain... Virus Omega.
James Bond: Infertility.
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: TOTAL Infertility! In plants and animals. Not just disease in a few herds, Mr. Bond. Or the loss of a single crop. But the destruction of a whole strain. Forever! Throughout an entire continent. If my demands are not met, I shall proceed with the systematic extinction of whole species of cereals and livestock all over the world!
Moneypenny: That was a quick conference. How do you expect a girl to keep herself alluring...
James Bond: Take a memo, please, Moneypenny.
Moneypenny: Ready, James.
James Bond: Sir, I have the honor to request you will accept my resignation, effective forthwith.
Moneypenny: Resignation from what?
James Bond: Her Majesty's Secret Service. And kindly present it to that monument in there.
James Bond: Moneypenny, what would I do without you?
Moneypenny: My problem is that you never do anything with me.
James Bond: Unusually small for a Nymphalis polychloros.
M: I wasn't aware that your expertise included lepidoptery.
James Bond: Good morning. My name's Bond, James Bond.
Casino Guest: [to Bond] The dame can't pay up.
James Bond: [to Countess Tracy di Vicenzo] Forgive me, my mind was elsewhere. Madame, you've forgotten we agreed to be partners this evening.
[Throws chips on the table to pay off her debt]
James Bond: Please continue.
Tracy: You're very sure of yourself, aren't you? Suppose I were to kill you for a thrill.
James Bond: I can think of something more sociable to do.
Tracy: So, you know your perfumes. What else do you know?
James Bond: A little about women.
Tracy: Think about me - as a woman you just bought.
James Bond: Who needs to buy?
Tracy: The only thing you need know about me is that I pay my debts.
James Bond: 20,000 francs is a lot of money.
Draco: Listen to me, on the day you marry her, I'll give you a personal dowry of one million pounds in gold.
James Bond: That's quite an inducement - but, I don't need a million pounds.
James Bond: And I have a bachelor's taste for freedom.
Draco: Please! Just tease her some more. Who knows what will come of it.
James Bond: You have connections not open to me. Where is Ernst Stavro Blofeld?
Draco: Blofeld? Some of my men have recently defected to him. I don't know where he is.
James Bond: Can you find out?
Draco: If I could, I wouldn't tell Her Majesty's Secret Service.
Moneypenny: James! Where have you been?
James Bond: Much too far from you, darling.
Moneypenny: Oh, same old James.
[James puts his hands on Moneypenny's behind]
Moneypenny: Only more so! Heartless, brute! Letting me pine away without even a postcard.
James Bond: Pine no more. Cocktails at my place, eightish. Just the two of us.
Moneypenny: Aw, I'd adore that. If only I could trust myself.
James Bond: Same old Moneypenny. Britain's last line of defense.
M: I'm relieving you from Operation Bedlam, 007.
James Bond: But, sir, Blofeld's something of a must with me.
M: You've had two years to run him down.
James Bond: Does this mean you've lost confidence in me?
M: I'm well aware of your talents, 007. But Licensed to Kill is *useless* - unless one can set up a target. I'll find you a more suitable assignment. That's all.
James Bond: Tracy, I was always taught that mistakes should be remedied, especially between friends - or lovers.
James Bond: Just keep my martini cool.
Waiter: What will you drink sir?
James Bond: Malt whiskey and branch water, please.
Irma Bunt: Your stiffness - of last night - it is all gone?
James Bond: For the time being, I think.
James Bond: Once they're warned, you'll have a problem dispensing the stuff.
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: That problem has already been solved. I've been training my own special - angels of death.
James Bond: Those girls.
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: Those girls - and many others like them.
James Bond: But exactly how?
Ernst Stavro Blofeld: That will remain my secret.
James Bond: Now, when we authorize a coat of arms, it can include all sorts of funny things: crescent moons, portcullis, beasts, cochons, rampants, bars, bezants.
Nancy: Please, what is bezants?
James Bond: Gold balls. I brought a book on the subject with me. There's a picture of my own coat of arms, actually - which includes four of them. If you'd care to see them.
Ruby: I'd love to!
James Bond: Maybe he didn't see me.
Tracy: I wouldn't go banco on that.
James Bond: Giving up bad habits, eh?
Tracy: Why are they looking for you?
James Bond: I suspect, they're trying to kill me.
James Bond: Thank you, Tracy. You've got sharp eyes and beautiful - ear lobes.
James Bond: Her Majesty's Secret Service is still my job.
Tracy: But, there isn't anything you can do about your job at the moment, is there?
James Bond: No.
Tracy: Then why are you thinking about it now?
James Bond: I'm not. I'm thinking about us.
James Bond: [Placing a phone call] Hello, Draco.
Draco: Yes, who is it?
James Bond: Bond, James Bond.
James Bond: Go and get the brandy. Five star Hennessy, of course.
Q: Look, James, I know that we haven't always exactly seen, well, anyway, don't forget, if there's anything you ever need...
James Bond: Thank you, Q, but, this time I've got the gadgets
[looks over towards Tracy]
James Bond: and I know how to use them.
James Bond: [Bond and Tracey have just got married and their car is adorned with flowers] We do look like an ad for a flower shop.
James Bond: [after their car crashes into the middle of a stock car race] Look's like we've hit the rush hour.
James Bond: [about to spend the night in a barn] Sorry about the accommodations, Contessa.
Tracy: We should have rung ahead and booked.
James Bond: Good girl!
[Confronting James Bond]
Kamal Khan: You have a nasty habit of surviving.
James Bond: You know what they say about the fittest.
James Bond: [looking at the tattoo on Magda's back] Forgive my curiosity, but, what is that?
Magda: That's my little octopussy.
James Bond: [Q's mechanized version of the "Indian Rope Trick" malfunctions] Having problems keeping it up, Q?
Q: Experimental model!
M: Remember, 007, you're on your own.
James Bond: Well, thank you, sir. That's a great comfort.
Magda: I guess this is good night.
James Bond: I could come in for a nightcap.
[Gobinda puts a hand in front of Magda's door]
James Bond: Some other time perhaps.
James Bond: [Gobinda walks Bond back to his room] I don't suppose you'd care for a nightcap?
[Bond and Q are floating in a hot air balloon]
James Bond: I trust you can handle this contraption, Q?
Q: It goes by hot air.
James Bond: Oh, then you can.
Q: [Q is demonstrating a pen filled with acid] Dissolves all metals.
James Bond: Wonderful for poison pen letters...
Q: Pay attention, 007!
James Bond: [bad guys are chasing Bond and Vijay] Vijay, we've got company!
Vijay: No problem, this is a company car.
[car accelerates through crowds]
Jim Fanning: [after Bond bids for the egg] Have you gone mad?
James Bond: Let's see how badly he wants it.
James Bond: [the real Col. Luis Toro has found Bond] Well, it's small world. You're a Toro, too!
Orlov: [enters the trailer, sees Bond in Mischka's 'Twin One' clothes from behind and mistakes him for Mischka] Leave that! Let's go.
James Bond: [turns around, facing Orlov with pointed gun] Let's stay. Sit on that box. Hands on your knees. Come on, move! Now why is that bomb on the train?
Orlov: Who are you?
James Bond: I'm British Secret Service.
Orlov: You should be more concerned about getting out of here alive.
James Bond: I am more concerned about an atomic bomb exploding on a US Air Force base in West Germany! You surely can't be inviting a nuclear war? What happens when the US retaliates?
Orlov: [grinning] Against whom?
James Bond: [frowning, realizing Orlov's scheme] My God... of course. Our early-warning system will rule out the bomb having come from Russia or anywhere else. Everyone will assume incorrectly... that it was a American bomb triggered accidentally.
Orlov: Yes, that would be the most plausible explanation.
James Bond: Europe and NATO will then insist on full nuclear disarmament... and leaving every border undefended for you and the Warsaw Pact to walk across at will!
Orlov: You took the words right out of my mouth.
James Bond: And I suppose it doesn't matter a damn to you that thousands of innocent people will be killed in this little "accident" of yours?
Orlov: Better than letting a handful of old men in Moscow bargain away our advantage in disarmament talks!
James Bond: On your feet, General. You're going to stop that train.
Orlov: [they hear hoot as the train starts to move off] It's too late.
James Bond: You can stop it at the border.
[suddenly the door opens. Bond turns around to see a Russian soldier. Bond kills the soldier before he manages to point his rifle, and meanwhile Orlov escapes]
[Bond is dragged from a river onto a tour boat]
Woman on Tour Boat: Are you with our group?
James Bond: No, ma'am, I'm with the economy tour!
James Bond: You didn't tell me there was going to be this much security.
Bianca: They moved the flight up to this afternoon.
James Bond: Well, we're going to have to go ahead as planned anyway.
[Bianca hands an ID badge with the name 'Luis Toro' to Bond]
James Bond: Toro. Sounds like a load of bull.
[Twin Two throws several knives at Bond, which pass through his clothes, pinning him to a cabin door]
Twin Two: [draws another knife] And this... for my brother...
[Bond plucks one of the knives from the door, and throws it at Twin Two, hitting him fatally in his stomach]
James Bond: And that's for 009!
Octopussy: A paid assassin.
James Bond: When I kill it is on the specific orders of my Government.
Front Desk Clerk: I hope you have a pleasant stay.
[Bond eyes a beauty nearby who smiles at him]
James Bond: I'm, ah, sure I will.
James Bond: [handing a wad of Indian cash to his accomplice] That should keep you in curry for a few weeks.
James Bond: I would have taken that double, myself.
Kamal Khan: Then, why don't you take over the Major's position? Mr?
James Bond: Bond, James Bond.
[Bond is in traction]
Octopussy: I wish...
James Bond: What?
Octopussy: I wish you weren't in such a weakened condition.
[Bond releases himself from traction]
Octopussy: Oh, James.
[Bond kisses Octopussy passionately]
Magda: [In bed] I need refilling.
James Bond: Hmm? Of course you do.
[Grabs for a champagne bottle]
James Bond: [using Kamal's loaded dice to beat him in backgammon] Double sixes. Fancy that!
James Bond: [he tosses all his money to the crowd] Easy comes, easy goes!
James Bond: [runs into a tiger in the jungle] Sit!
M: You had no business bidding for that egg! What would you have done if you'd had been stuck with it?
James Bond: Then I would have claimed it was a fake, sir... and not paid.
M: Not paid?
James Bond: Here is the real one. I swiped it with the fake at the auction.
M: Good God. And what happens when the buyer discovers this?
James Bond: He complains.
James Bond: I don't think he will complain. According to Fanning, this Kamal usually sells. Now he buys. I think the fake will smoke him out. I had a tail follow him to Heathrow, where he caught a plane to Delhi.
M: You must go there, too. I'll have Sadruddin, our man at Station I, there to assist you.
James Bond: Yes, well, I have exactly 35 minutes to catch that plane.
M: Oh, Bond... sign a chit for that egg on your way out... it's government property now.
James Bond: Well, I must say you've become more beautiful everyday.
Miss Moneypenny: *I'm* over here.
James Bond: Oh, of course you are.
Miss Moneypenny: And this is Miss Penelope Smallbone - my new assistant.
James Bond: [Bond's jet is on empty but he manages to land it next to a gas station and the pump attendant comes out to greet him] Fill er' up, please!
James Bond: What can I say Miss Moneypenny, except to say that she is - as attractive and, eh, - as charming...
Miss Moneypenny: As I used to be?
James Bond: I didn't say that.
Miss Moneypenny: You're such a flatter, James.
James Bond: Oh, Moneypenny, you know there never has been and - there never will be anybody but you.
Miss Moneypenny: So, you've told me.
James Bond: Welcome to universal exports.
[Bond gives Miss Smallbone a bouquet of red carnations]
Miss Moneypenny: Take it dear, that's all you'll ever get from him.
Penelope Smallbone: Thank you, Commander Bond.
James Bond: You know me?
Penelope Smallbone: Miss Moneypenny described you.
Miss Moneypenny: In nauseating detail.
James Bond: Really?
M: Do you know what this is?
James Bond: Why, it looks like a FabergÃ© egg, sir. One of the jeweled eggs made by Carl FabergÃ© as an Easter gift to the Russian royal family. They're priceless and very rare. This one contains a model of the imperial stage coach.
M: Top marks, 007.
James Bond: Thank you, sir.
M: Except - it's a fake.
James Bond: May I join you? Sotheby's. Half a million pounds.
Magda: The man at the auction.
James Bond: Precisely.
Magda: You have a very good memory for faces.
James Bond: And figures.
James Bond: Ah, Q - how are you?
Q: Most unhappy, 007, thanks to you. How can I be expected to maintain the quality of my work? Sent out here at a moment's notice! No proper facilities!
James Bond: Yes, well, you wouldn't have a small piece of thread, now. Somebody seems to have stuck a knife in my wallet.
Q: Ah, they missed you. What a pity!
James Bond: I've also mislaid my PPK.
Q: Anything else?
James Bond: No, that's all Q.
James Bond: Let's put it this way, up to now you are the least lethal and, by far, the prettiest of Kamal's friends that I've come across.
Magda: Thank you.
James Bond: So, does he have a proposition for me or - do you?
Magda: He suggests trade. The egg - for you life.
James Bond: Well, I heard the price of eggs was going up, but, isn't that a little high?
Magda: It's for my scrapbook. I collect - memories.
James Bond: Well, let's get on with - making a few.
Kamal Khan: Good evening, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: Good evening.
Kamal Khan: Well rested? I believe you and Miss Magda have - met?
James Bond: It was a pleasure.
Magda: You're too kind.
James Bond: At the risk of appearing to be making light dinner conversation, may I ask exactly why I'm here?
Sadruddin: It belongs to a fabulously wealthy woman who lives on the floating palace.
James Bond: Who is she?
Sadruddin: No one knows her real name; but, she's known as Octopussy.
James Bond: Well, that's the name I heard at Kamal's.
Vijay: I hear the island is fully of beautiful women. No men allowed.
James Bond: Really? Sexual discrimination. I'll definitely have to pay it a visit.
Octopussy: Good evening. I wondered when you might arrive.
James Bond: So you are the mysterious Octopussy.
Octopussy: And you are James Bond, 007, Licensed to Kill. Am I to be your target tonight?
Octopussy: Mr. Bond, smuggling is no concern of the Secret Service. I've violated no English law. You're free to leave; but, I'd much rather prefer if you'd stay as my guest for a few days.
James Bond: I'd like that.
Octopussy: [James embraces and kisses Octopussy] No!
James Bond: You're right, we are two of a kind.
Octopussy: Oh - James!
Octopussy: Is something wrong?
James Bond: Not really. Just a feeling.
Octopussy: Why don't you come back to bed.
James Bond: [Bond lands his plane, folds up the wings and drives into a gas station] Fill her up, please.
Octopussy: [Bond sneaks on to the island and makes his way into Octopussy's room] I wondered when you might arrive.
James Bond: So you are the mysterious Octopussy.
Octopussy: And you are James Bond. Licensed to kill. Am l to be your target for tonight?
James Bond: Not necessarily. Depends how much you tell me about jewelry smuggling. And why one of our agents was killed in East Berlin.
Octopussy: I know nothing about that. You remember Major Dexter Smythe? You were sent out to arrest him, weren't you?
James Bond: You seem to have done your homework.
Octopussy: Thank you.
James Bond: Yes. Smythe, after a brilliant military career, joined our secret service. His mission was to recover a cache of Chinese gold, seized in North Korea. Both he and his native guide disappeared. The gold was never found.
Octopussy: And 15 years later you were sent after him.
James Bond: The guide's body turned up with a bullet still in his skull from Smythe's revolver. I traced Smythe to Sri Lanka, and gave him 24 hours to clear up his affairs before I took him back. He committed suicide rather than face the disgrace of a court martial. What's the connection?
Octopussy: He was my father. I'd hoped fate would bring us together one day.
James Bond: To avenge him?
Octopussy: To thank you for giving him an honorable alternative.
Octopussy: When Father's gold ran out, the people in Hong Kong who'd disposed of it for him offered me a commission to smuggle some diamonds. I discovered I had a talent for it.
James Bond: You went into business for yourself?
Octopussy: Yes, but l needed an organization, so l revived the old Octopus cult.
James Bond: Well, then. Where did you recruit all these lovelies?
Octopussy: There are many of them all over Southeast Asia, looking for a guru, spiritual discipline, who knows what. l train them. Give them a purpose, a sisterhood and a way of life.
James Bond: In crime?
Octopussy: In business. I have diversified into shipping, hotels, carnivals and circuses.
James Bond: Do you expect me to talk?
Auric Goldfinger: No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die!
James Bond: Who are you?
Pussy Galore: My name is Pussy Galore.
James Bond: I must be dreaming.
Q: Now this one I'm particularly keen about. You see the gear lever here? Now, if you take the top off, you will find a little red button. Whatever you do, don't touch it.
James Bond: Yeah, why not?
Q: Because you'll release this section of the roof, and engage and then fire the passenger ejector seat. Whish!
James Bond: Ejector seat? You're joking!
Q: I never joke about my work, 007.
James Bond: My dear girl, there are some things that just aren't done, such as drinking Dom Perignon '53 above the temperature of 38 degrees Fahrenheit. That's just as bad as listening to the Beatles without earmuffs!
[after knocking a fan into a bathtub to electrocute a bad guy]
James Bond: Shocking! Positively shocking!
James Bond: What do you know about gold, Moneypenny?
Miss Moneypenny: Oh, the only gold I know about is the kind you wear... you know, on the third finger of your left hand?
James Bond: Hmm, one of these days we really must look into that.
Miss Moneypenny: What about tonight? You'll come over for dinner...
[playfully tosses Bond's hat onto the hat rack]
Miss Moneypenny: and I'll cook you a wonderful angel cake.
James Bond: Well, nothing would give me greater pleasure, but unfortunately I do have a... business appointment.
Miss Moneypenny: That's the flimsiest excuse you've ever given me. Oh, well, some girls have all the luck. Who is she, James?
M: [over intercom] "She" is me, Miss Moneypenny. And kindly omit the customary byplay with 007. He's dining with me and I don't want him to be late.
Miss Moneypenny: [to Bond] So there's hope for me yet.
James Bond: [gives Moneypenny a playful peck on the cheek] Moneypenny, won't you ever believe me?
Mei-Lei: Can I do anything for you, Mr. Bond?
James Bond: Uh, just a drink. A martini, shaken, not stirred.
[Gesturing to a crushed car]
Auric Goldfinger: Forgive me, Mr. Bond, but, uh... I must arrange to separate my gold from the late Mr. Solo.
James Bond: As you said, he had a pressing engagement.
[seeing the body of Oddjob who was electrocuted]
Felix Leiter: You okay, James? Where's your butler friend?
James Bond: He blew a fuse.
James Bond: Manners, Oddjob. I thought you always took your hat off to a lady.
James Bond: [to Pussy] You know, he kills little girls like you.
Pussy Galore: Little boys, too.
Auric Goldfinger: Ah, welcome to AuricStud, Mr. Bond.
[gesturing toward a horse]
Auric Goldfinger: Beautiful animal, isn't she?
James Bond: Certainly better bred than the owner.
Pussy Galore: What happened? Where's Goldfinger?
James Bond: Playing his golden harp.
James Bond: You'll kill 60,000 people uselessly.
Auric Goldfinger: Hah. American motorists kill that many every two years.
James Bond: Yes, well, I've worked out a few statistics of my own. 15 billion dollars in gold bullion weighs 10,500 tons. Sixty men would take twelve days to load it onto 200 trucks. Now, at the most, you're going to have two hours before the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines move in and make you put it back.
Auric Goldfinger: Who mentioned anything about removing it?
[Bond is stunned into silence]
Auric Goldfinger: The julep tart enough for you?
James Bond: You plan to break into the world's largest bank, but not to steal anything. Why?
Auric Goldfinger: Go on, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: [thinking] Mr. Ling, the Red Chinese at the factory, he's a specialist in nuclear fission... but of course! His government's given you a bomb.
Auric Goldfinger: I prefer to call it an "atomic device." It's small, but particularly dirty.
James Bond: A dirty bomb? Cobalt and iodine?
Auric Goldfinger: Precisely.
James Bond: Well, if you explode it in Fort Knox, the... the entire gold supply of the United States would be radioactive for... fifty-seven years.
Auric Goldfinger: Fifty-eight, to be exact.
James Bond: I apologize, Goldfinger. It's an inspired deal! They get what they want, economic chaos in the West. And the value of your gold increases many times.
Auric Goldfinger: I conservatively estimate, ten times.
James Bond: Brilliant.
James Bond: [over intercom to Goldfinger, who has been cheating at cards] Now hear this, Goldfinger. Your luck has just changed. I doubt very much that the Miami Beach Police would take kindly to what you're doing. Nod your head if you agree... Nod...
James Bond: Good. Now, start losing, Goldfinger. Shall we say ten thousand dollars? No, let's be generous. Let's make it fifteen thousand.
[Goldfinger hesitates, then throws a card on the table]
Simmons: Well, I can see this is really my day!
[puts his cards on the table]
Jill Masterson: May I see?
[looks through binoculars. She sees Goldfinger snap his pencil in disgust]
James Bond: [over intercom] Over and out.
[switches intercom off, then to Jill]
James Bond: That should keep him occupied for quite some time.
Jill Masterson: I'm beginning to like you, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: Oh... call me James.
Jill Masterson: More than anyone I've ever met in a long time... James.
James Bond: Well, what are we going to do about it?
Jill Masterson: Yes, what?
James Bond: I'll tell you at dinner.
Jill Masterson: Where?
James Bond: Oh, I know the best place in town.
James Bond: Bond, James Bond
James Bond: [to Jill, who has been helping Goldfinger cheat at cards] What's your name?
Jill Masterson: Jill.
James Bond: Jill who?
Jill Masterson: Jill Masterson.
James Bond: Tell me, Jill... why does he do it?
Jill Masterson: He likes to win.
James Bond: Why do you do it?
Jill Masterson: He pays me.
James Bond: Is that all he pays you for?
Jill Masterson: And for being seen with him.
James Bond: Just seen?
Jill Masterson: Just seen.
James Bond: Oh, I'm so glad. You're much too nice to be mixed up in anything like this, you know.
Pussy Galore: [pointing a gun at Bond, who has just emerged from the airplane lavatory] We'll be landing in twenty minutes. Do you want to play it easy, or the hard way? And this isn't a tranquilizer gun.
James Bond: Now, Pussy, you know a lot more about planes than guns. That's a Smith and Wesson 45, and if you fire at me at this close range, the bullet will pass through me and the fuselage like a blowtorch through butter. The cabin will depressurize, and we'll both be sucked into outer space together. If that's how you want to enter the United States, you're welcome. As for me, I prefer the easy way.
Pussy Galore: That's very sensible.
James Bond: Besides, there's always so much going on around Mr. Goldfinger. It would be a shame not to accept his hospitality.
Pussy Galore: I'm sure he'll be happy to see you, too.
Colonel Smithers: Have a little more of this rather disappointing brandy.
M: What's the matter with it?
James Bond: I'd say it was a 30-year-old fine, indifferently blended, sir... with an overdose of bon-bois.
M: Colonel Smithers is giving the lecture, 007.
James Bond: Special plane, lunch at the White House... how come?
Felix Leiter: The President wants to thank you personally.
James Bond: Oh, it was nothing, really.
Felix Leiter: I know that, but he doesn't.
James Bond: I suppose I'll be able to get a drink there.
Felix Leiter: I told the stewardess liquor for three.
James Bond: Who are the other two?
Felix Leiter: Oh, there are no other two.
James Bond: You're a woman of many parts, Pussy!
James Bond: Thank you.
Sierra: Mr. Ramirez and his friends will be out of business.
James Bond: At least they won't be using heroin flavored bananas to finance revolutions.
James Bond: [to Goldfinger, after Oddjob has just decapitated a statue at the golf club] Remarkable... but what does the club secretary have to say?
Auric Goldfinger: Oh, nothing, Mr. Bond... I own the club.
James Bond: [discovers Goldfinger cheating at golf] You play a Slazenger 1, don't you?
Auric Goldfinger: Yes, why?
James Bond: This is a Slazenger 7.
[indicating his own golf ball]
James Bond: Here's my Penfold Hearts. You must have played the wrong ball somewhere on the 18th fairway. We are playing strict rules, so I'm afraid you lose the hole and the match.
[Goldfinger throws the golf ball to the ground in disgust]
Auric Goldfinger: [to Bond, who is about to be cut in half by a laser] There is nothing you can talk to me about that I don't already know.
James Bond: Well, you're forgetting one thing. If I fail to report, 008 replaces me.
Auric Goldfinger: I trust he will be more successful.
James Bond: Well, he knows what I know.
Auric Goldfinger: You know nothing, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: Operation Grand Slam, for instance.
Auric Goldfinger: Two words you may have overheard, which cannot have the slightest significance to you or anyone in your organization.
James Bond: Can you afford to take that chance?
Auric Goldfinger: [thinks for a moment, then orders the laser switched off] You are quite right, Mr. Bond. You are worth more to me alive.
[a technician approaches Bond, and fires a tranquilzer dart into his chest. Bond collapses into unconsciousness]
Radio Newsman: [broadcasting on radio, over Bond and Jill, who are kissing passionately in bed] Station WEBS brings you the latest in world news. Washington... at the White House today, the president said that he was entirely satisfied...
[Bond switches off the radio]
James Bond: [to Jill] That makes two of us.
Pussy Galore: I'm Mr. Goldfinger's personal pilot.
James Bond: You are? And, just how personal is that?
Pussy Galore: I'm a damn good pilot! Period.
James Bond: What would it take for you to see things my way?
Pussy Galore: A lot more than you've got.
James Bond: How do you know?
Pussy Galore: I don't want to know.
M: Gold? All over?
James Bond: She died of skin suffocation. It's been known to happen to cabaret dancers. It's all right as long as you leave a small bare patch at the base of the spine to allow the skin to breathe.
M: Someone obviously didn't.
James Bond: And I know who.
M: This isn't a personal vendetta, 007. It's an assignment, like any other. And if you can't treat it as such, coldly and objectively, 008 can replace you.
M: You've hardly distinguished yourself, have you? You were supposed to observe Mr. Goldfinger, not borrow his girlfriend. Instead of that, Goldfinger goes off to Europe, and it's only by the grace of God, your friend Leiter, and my intervention with the British Embassy in Washington, that you're not in the custody of the Miami Beach Police!
James Bond: [frustrated] Sir... I am aware of my shortcomings... and I am prepared to continue this assignment in the spirit you suggest... if I knew what it was about!
[catches himself, then more calmly]
James Bond: ... sir.
M: What do you know about gold? Not paint, bullion.
James Bond: I know it when I see it.
M: Meet me tonight at seven. Black tie.
Colonel Smithers: [Referring to the gold bar on the dining room table] Mr. Bond can make whatever use of it he deems necessary... provided he returns it, of course. It's worth five thousand pounds.
[Bond reaches for the bar, but M stops him short]
M: You'll draw it from Q Branch... with the rest of your equipment... in the morning.
James Bond: Of course, sir.
Colonel Smithers: Gentlemen, Mr. Goldfiinger has gold bullion on deposit in Zurich, Amsterdam, Caracas, Hong Kong... worth 20 million pounds. Most of it came from this country.
James Bond: Why move it?
Colonel Smithers: Because the price of gold varies from country to country. If you buy it here at 30 dollars an ounce, you can sell it in, say, Pakistan for 110 dollars and triple your money... provided, of course, you have the facilities for melting it down.
James Bond: And has he?
Colonel Smithers: Apart from being a legitimate international bullion dealer, Mr. Goldfinger poses... no, that's not quite fair... *is*, among his many other pursuits, a legitimate international jeweler. He's legally entitled to operate modest metallurgical installations. His British one is down in Kent. We have yet to discover how he transfers his gold out of the coutry... Lord knows we've tried.
Colonel Smithers: If your department can establish that it is being done illegally, the bank can institute proceedings to recover the bulk of his holdings.
James Bond: I think it's time Mr. Goldfinger and I met... socially, of course.
Colonel Smithers: I was hoping you'd say that.
M: It might lead to a business talk... Mr. Goldfinger's kind of business.
Auric Goldfinger: [Playing golf with Bond] Two holes to go.
James Bond: Yes, and all's square.
Auric Goldfinger: Then you have no objection to increasing the stakes?
James Bond: No. What did you have in mind?
Auric Goldfinger: Why, the bar of gold you have with you, naturally.
James Bond: [Surprised] It's worth five thousand pounds.
Auric Goldfinger: [Offhandedly] Oh, I'll stake the cash equivalent.
James Bond: Naturally.
[Bond tees up his ball and starts his backswing, but Goldfinger interrupts him]
Auric Goldfinger: Strict rules of golf?
James Bond: But of course.
Q: [Showing Bond a tracking device] Reception on the dashboard, here. Audo-visual
Q: , range a hundred and fifty miles.
James Bond: Ingenious, and useful too. Allow a man to stop off for a quick one en route.
Q: It has not been perfected, out of years of patient research, ENTIRELY for that purpose, 007. And incidentally, we'd appreciate its return, along with all your other equipment, INTACT for once, when you return from the field.
James Bond: Well, you'd be surprised the amount of wear and tear that goes on out there in the field.
[Why Bond wears a gun]
James Bond: I have a slight inferiority complex.
[Goldfinger is cheating at golf, with the help of Oddjob]
Hawker: If that's his original ball, I'm Arnold Palmer.
James Bond: 'Tisn't.
Hawker: How do you know?
James Bond: I'm standing on it.
[a laser is about to cut Bond in half]
James Bond: I think you made your point. Thank you for the demonstration.
Auric Goldfinger: Choose your next witticism carefully Mr. Bond, it may be your last.
James Bond: Oh, no you don't.
[Bond grabs Pussy to pull her down as she is waving to a helicopter]
James Bond: This is no time to be rescued.
[Bond kisses Pussy passionately]
Colonel Smithers: We, here at the Bank of England, Mr. Bond, are the official depository for gold bullion... just as Fort Knox, Kentucky is for the United States. We know, of course, the amounts we each hold, we know the amounts deposited in other banks, and we can estimate what is being held for industrial purposes. This allows our two governments to establish, respectively, the true value of the dollar and the pound. Consequently, we are vitally concerned about unauthorized leakages.
James Bond: I take it you mean smuggling.
Colonel Smithers: Yes. Gold, gentlemen, which can be melted down and recast, is virtually untraceable... making it, unlike diamonds, ideal for smuggling... attracting the biggest and most ingenious criminals.
[to Pussy Galore]
James Bond: We must have a few fast falls together some time.
James Bond: [speaking to a woman when another spy arrives to talk business] Run along now, man talk...
James Bond: You know Operation Grand Slam simply won't work. And incidentally Delta-9 nerve gas is fatal.
Auric Goldfinger: You are unusually well informed, Mr Bond.
James Bond: Auric Goldfinger. Sounds like a French nail varnish.
James Bond: [after being met by Pussy Galore, dressed in a casual yet seductive outfit] Well, well, the new Miss Galore. Where do you hide your gold knuckles in that outfit.
Pussy Galore: Oh, I never carry weapons after business hours.
James Bond: None at all?
Pussy Galore: [with a very friendly smile] I'm completely defenseless...
James Bond: [after thoroughly looking her over] ... so am I.
James Bond: [after Tilly Masterson honks her horn and passes Bond's car, he restrains himself from chasing after her] Discipline, 007. Discipline.
Felix Leiter: [Sees Bond getting a massage by Dink near a hotel pool] I thought I'd find you in good hands.
James Bond: Felix! Felix, how are you? Dink, meet Felix Leiter.
James Bond: Felix, say hello to Dink
Felix Leiter: Hi, Dink.
James Bond: Dink, say goodbye to Felix.
James Bond: Eh, man talk.
[Slaps Dink on the fanny as she walks away]
Jill Masterson: Who are you?
James Bond: Bond, James Bond.
[after learning Pussy Galore alerted the authorities]
James Bond: I must have appealed to her maternal instincts.
Mei-Lei: Can I do something for you, Mr. Bond?
James Bond: Eh, just a drink. A martini. Shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: [to Pussy, about Goldfinger] He's quite mad, you know?
Sierra: Don't go back to your hotel seÃ±or. They'll be watching you. There's a plane leaving for Miami in an hour.
James Bond: I'll be on it; but, first I have some unfinished business to attend to.
[next scene, Bond walks into a hotel room with a naked woman in a bathtub]
James Bond: Where's my Bentley?
Q: Oh, it's had its day, I'm afraid.
James Bond: It's never let me down
Q: M's orders, 007. You'll be using this Aston Martin DB5 with modifications. Now, pay attention please. Windscreen - bulletproof. As are the side and the rear windows. Revolving number plates, naturally. Valid - all countries.
Q: Here's a nice little transmitting device. Its called a homer. You prime it by pressing that back like this. You see. The smaller model is now standard field issue - to be fitted into the heel of your shoe. Its larger brother is magnetic. Right. It can be concealed in the car your trailing while you keep out of sight. Reception - on the dashboard here.
[Sits in the Aston Martin DB5]
Q: Audio visual range 150 miles.
James Bond: Ingenious and useful too. Allow a man to stop off for a quick one on route.
Q: It has not been perfected after years of patient research entirely for that purpose, 007.
Q: You see this arm here?
[Points inside the Aston Martin DB5]
Q: Open the top and inside are your defense mechanism controls. Smokescreen. Oil slick. Rear bulletproof screen. And left and right front wing machine guns. Now, this one I'm particularly keen on. You see the gear lever here. Now, if you take the top off, you find a little red button. Whatever you do, don't touch it.
James Bond: And why not?
Q: Because you release this section of the roof and engage and fire the passenger ejector seat. Whoosh!
James Bond: Ejector seat, you're joking?
Q: I never joke about my work, 007.
Blacking: Mr. Bond?
James Bond: Yes?
Blacking: This is Mr. Goldfinger.
Auric Goldfinger: How do you do?
James Bond: How do *you* do?
James Bond: [to Pussy] I believe that the bourbon and branch water is rather splendid here in Kentucky. Now that we're both off duty, perhaps...
James Bond: Pussy! Who taught you judo?
Felix Leiter: [With another government agent, observing with binoculars Bond and Pussy walking into a barn at Goldfinger's stud farm] 007 seems to have the situation well in hand. Come, I'm bushed, let's get back to the motel.
James Bond: [Next scene, inside the barn] You're quite a girl, Pussy.
James Bond: Now, let's both play.
[Proceeds to force himself on Pussy, until she relents]
James Bond: Why were you shooting at me?
Tilly Masterson: I wasn't. I was shooting at Goldfinger.
James Bond: Then you're an awful shot.
Kara Milovy: What happened?
James Bond: He got the boot.
James Bond: Cheer up, Saunders. The operation's a success. And officially, its still yours.
Saunders: I have no intention of leaving it at that, 007! I'm reporting to M that you deliberately missed. Your orders were to kill that sniper!
James Bond: *Stuff* my orders! I only kill professionals. That girl didn't know one end of her rifle from the other. Go ahead. Tell M what you want. If he fires me, I'll thank him for it. Whoever she was, it must have scared the living daylights out of her.
[after escaping out of a small jail cell]
Kara Milovy: You were fantastic. We're free.
James Bond: Kara, we're inside a Russian airbase in the middle of Afghanistan.
James Bond: I've come for Koskov.
Brad Whitaker: Hell, you can *have* him. As soon as I get my opium. Now where is it?
James Bond: Up in smoke.
Brad Whitaker: [incredulous] You burned up a half a billion bucks?
Brad Whitaker: That's too bad, Bond. You could've been a live rich man, instead of a poor dead one.
James Bond: You're *finished*, Whitaker! If the Russians don't get you, the Americans will!
Brad Whitaker: Nah. You know Meade should have taken another 35,000 casualties. Could have ended the rebellion right then and there. Hell, Grant would have done it.
[Whitaker manages to knock Bond off his feet, grab a machine gun and open fire on him]
General Georgi Koskov: I'm sorry, James. For you I have great affection, but we have an old saying: duty has no sweethearts.
James Bond: We have an old saying too, Georgi. And you're full of it.
Linda: [into phone] It's all so boring here, Margo - there's nothing but playboys and tennis pros.
Linda: If only I could find a real man.
[James Bond, having just dispatched an assassin in a burning truck in mid-air, lands on the boat with a smoldering parachute]
James Bond: I need to use your phone.
[takes it and says into it]
James Bond: She'll call you back.
Linda: Who are you?
James Bond: Bond, James Bond.
James Bond: Exercise Control, 007 here. I'll report in an hour.
Linda: [offering drink] Won't you join me?
James Bond: [into phone] Better make that's two.
[Bond finds Whitaker playing with toy soldiers]
James Bond: Pickett's charge was up Cemetary Ridge, not Little Round Top.
Brad Whitaker: I'm reenacting the battle as I would have fought it. Meade was tenacious, but he was cautious. He missed his chances to crush Lee at Gettsyburg.
[On Whitaker being crushed under a statue of the Duke of Wellington]
James Bond: He met his Waterloo.
James Bond: [Bond is pointing a gun at him] Get down on your knees. Put your hands behind your back.
Leonid Pushkin: You are professional. You do not kill without reason.
James Bond: 2 of our men are dead. Koskov's named you. Why should I disobey my orders?
Leonid Pushkin: I am in the dark as much as you. It is a question of trust. Who do you believe? Koskov, or me?
James Bond: If I trusted Koskov we wouldn't be talking. But as long as you're alive, we'll never know what he's up to.
Leonid Pushkin: [Slowly] Then I must die.
James Bond: You didn't think I'd miss this performance, did you?
[Bond kisses Kara passionately]
Kara Milovy: Oh, James!
James Bond: Keep this between ourselves.
Miss Moneypenny: That girl must be very talented.
James Bond: Believe me, my interest in her is purely professional.
James Bond: [after destroying his car] Glad I insisted you brought that cello.
Kara Milovy: [a police car had been cut with a laser] What happened?
James Bond: [mockingly] Salt corrosion.
Leonid Pushkin: [Bond gets the drop on Pushkin] I take this is not a social call, 007.
James Bond: Correct.
[referring to flowers]
James Bond: You should have brought lilies.
Leonid Pushkin: May I ask why?
James Bond: Smiert Spionam.
Leonid Pushkin: Smiert Spionam? Was a Beria operation, in Stalin's time. It was deactivated 20 years ago.
James Bond: Two of our men are dead.
Leonid Pushkin: My condolences. We had nothing to do with it.
Kara Milovy: You dumb, stupid, stubborn, zadnyaya chast' loshadi!
James Bond: What's that supposed to mean?
Kara Milovy: Back end of horse!
James Bond: Are you calling me a horse's arse?
[James Bond and Kara Milovy snow-slide through customs in a cello case]
James Bond: [yelling] We have nothing to declare.
Kara Milovy: [yelling] Except this cello.
[the word 'cello' echoes through the valley a few times]
[struggling with Kara's cello]
James Bond: Why didn't you learn the violin?
General Georgi Koskov: The sniper was a woman.
James Bond: I noticed.
General Georgi Koskov: Some of the best KGB shots are women.
James Bond: Um-hum.
General Georgi Koskov: Did you...
James Bond: I'd rather not talk about it.
General Georgi Koskov: [thinking Bond killed her] Oh, no. Of course not.
James Bond: Lovely girl with the cello.
Saunders: Forget the ladies for once, Bond.
James Bond: [in the Aston Martin] I had a few optional extras installed.
James Bond: Relax Georgi. Our engineers have spent months perfecting this.
General Georgi Koskov: How many times have you done this before?
James Bond: You're the first!
Kara Milovy: Vienna's beautiful. Just like Georgi said.
James Bond: You care for him a great deal, don't you?
Kara Milovy: I owe him everything. My scholarship at the Conservatoire. My Strad.
James Bond: Your cello's a Stradivarius?
Kara Milovy: A famous one! The "Lady Rose". Georgi lived in New York.
James Bond: Quite a present.
Kara Milovy: Maybe someday I'll play there. At Carnegie Hall? Georgi believes I can do it.
James Bond: I'm sure he's right.
James Bond: Just taking the Aston Martin out for a quick spin, Q.
Q: Be careful, 007. Its just had a new coat of paint!
[Bond and Saunders meet for the first time]
Saunders: Saunders. Head of Section "V" Vienna. You're *bloody* late. This is a mission, not a fancy dress ball.
James Bond: We have time.
[Bond and Saunders are discussing the change of plans on Koskov's defection]
General Georgi Koskov: James. James Bond!
James Bond: [hugging Koskov] Later, General!
James Bond: [to Saunders] Lose them. I'll pick you up at the border, twenty-three hundred hours. Be there.
Saunders: Where are you taking him? How will you get him out?
James Bond: Sorry, old man, section 26, paragraph 5. Need-to-know. Sure you understand.
James Bond: Don't think. Just let it happen.
[Saunders has just been assassinated]
Kara Milovy: Did you hear?
James Bond: Hear from Georgi?
James Bond: Yes, I *got* the message.
Kara Milovy: I've been such a fool.
James Bond: [grasping her hand and squeezing it] We both have.
James Bond: I'm posing as Koskov's friend to see what leads I can get from her. You know he bought her a cello in New York, called "The Lady Rose".
Saunders: A cello with a name?
James Bond: It's a Stradivarius.
James Bond: [when Saunders looks none the wiser] They *all* have names. Now where would Koskov get that kind of money? Check it out.
Rosika Miklos: Remember, when this says 100, turn this. Not before.
[starts to leave]
James Bond: Where are you going?
Rosika Miklos: To take care of the supervisor. When pig goes, his control panel will light up like christmas tree.
Kamran Shah: [men threaten Bond and Kara]
[talks in different language]
James Bond: What did you tell them?
Kamran Shah: I tell them you not Russian. They no kill you now.
Kara Milovy: Not now? How about later?
Q: Una Yakov. Confirmed kills - 3. Probable kills - 2. Assassination methods - strangulation with hands or thighs.
Miss Moneypenny: Why, James, she's just your type.
James Bond: Wrong again, Moneypenny. You are.
Miss Moneypenny: I'll file that with the other secret information around here.
James Bond: Moneypenny, be a dear, ask Records to monitor Czech publications and news services, see if they can find any mention of a woman cellist at a Conservatoire in Bratislava.
Miss Moneypenny: I didn't know you were such a music lover, James. Anytime you want to drop by and listen to my Barry Manilow collection...
[Bond pats Moneypenny on the behind twice and leaves]
General Georgi Koskov: What's this? From Harrods - a godsend! The food here is horrible.
James Bond: The foie gras is excellent.
General Georgi Koskov: Da-da-da. As Russians say, "Heart and stomachs, good comrades made." Head cheese, caviar, well that's peasant food for us, but, with champagne its okay. Bollinger R.D. - the best!
James Bond: There are a few things I'd like to check out first, sir. That sniper, for instance.
M: Yes. I've read Saunders report. You jeopardized the entire mission to avoid shooting a beautiful girl.
James Bond: Not exactly, sir. I took a split second decision. It was instinct.
Q: Stun gas! Effective range - oh, about five feet. Disorientates any normal person for about - oh, 30 seconds.
James Bond: You don't find too many normal people in this business, Q.
Q: We packed the finder with a highly concentrated plastic explosive. Sufficient to remove a door of any safe. Its magnetic. The actuating signal is personalized.
James Bond: What's my code?
Q: Most appropriate: a wolf whistle.
Kara Milovy: You're English. Who are you?
James Bond: I heard you play at the Conservatoire yesterday. It was exquisite. I saw what happened on the Tram. Where'd they take you? KGB headquarters?
Kara Milovy: [Bond tuning the car radio] You picked the police band?
James Bond: It must be an atmospheric phenomenon.
Kara Milovy: They are looking for a foreign car. A man and a woman!
James Bond: And a cello!
Vienna Hotel Concierge: Oh, Good afternoon Mr. Bond. You will need your usual suite?
James Bond: Not tonight, Heinz. Something with a second bedroom.
Vienna Hotel Concierge: Yes, sir. Shall I have some Vodka martinis sent up?
James Bond: Shaken, not stirred.
Saunders: It was bought recently, at auction in New York. Lot 1-2-4, the "Lady Rose" a cello by Stradivarius of Cremona. 1724. Sold for $150,000 - to Brad Whitaker.
James Bond: Whitaker? The arms dealer?
Saunders: The same.
James Bond: That was damn stupid!
Blonde in Red Convertible: Hey! You lookin' for a party?
James Bond: Seems like a good idea.
[Bond gets in the car]
James Bond: I know a great restaurant in Karachi. We can just make dinner.
James Bond: [referring to man who beats up another man] Hope he's not invited to dinner.
Felix Leiter: Just what the hell are you trying to do, 007? Start World War III?
James Bond: Felix Leiter. Now what's the CIA doing here?
Felix Leiter: Nice work girls.
Linda: No hard feelings?
James Bond: Just as long as the party's still on.
James Bond: It's the work of the Mujahideen.
Kara Milovy: Mujahideen?
James Bond: The Afghan resistance.
Lazar: Mr. Bond, bullets do not kill. It is the finger that pulls the trigger.
James Bond: Exactly. I am now aiming precisely at your groin. So speak or forever hold your piece.
Francisco Scaramanga: A duel between titans. My golden gun against your Walther PPK. Each of us with a 50-50 chance.
James Bond: Six bullets to your one?
Francisco Scaramanga: I only need one.
James Bond: I mean sir, who would pay a million dollars to have me killed?
M: Jealous husbands! Outraged chefs! Humiliated tailors! The list is endless!
Francisco Scaramanga: When I was a boy I was brought up in a circus. My only real friend was a huge, magnificent African bull elephant. One day, his handler mistreated him and he went berserk. Bleeding, dying, he came and found me, stood on one leg, his best trick, picked me up and put me on his back. The drunken handler came along and emptied his gun into his eye... I emptied my stage pistol into his!
James Bond: An eye for an eye.
Francisco Scaramanga: You see, Mr. Bond, I always thought I loved animals. Then I discovered that I enjoyed killing people even more.
James Bond: Miss Anders... I didn't recognize you with your clothes on.
James Bond: You live well, Scaramanga.
Francisco Scaramanga: At a million dollars a contract I can afford to, Mr Bond. You work for peanuts, a hearty well done from her Majesty the Queen and a pittance of a pension. Apart from that we are the same. To us, Mr Bond, we are the best.
James Bond: There's a useful four letter word, and you're full of it.
Andrea Anders: [Bond is interrogating her for Scaramanga's whereabouts] I know he has a date at the Bottom's Up club tonight!
James Bond: How will I recognize him?
Andrea Anders: Tall, slim and dark.
James Bond: So is my aunt. Anything distinctive about him?
Andrea Anders: Yes, but how can I...
Andrea Anders: He's not like other people. He has three...
[points to her chest]
James Bond: Oh. Fascinating anatomical tidbit, but probably the most useless piece of information I ever heard. Unless of course the Bottom's Up is a strip club and Scaramanga is performing there.
James Bond: When I kill, its on the specific orders of my government. And those I kill are themselves killers.
Francisco Scaramanga: Now, Come, come, Mr. Bond. You disappoint me. You get as much fulfillment out of killing as I do, so why don't you admit it?
James Bond: I admit killing you would be a pleasure.
Francisco Scaramanga: Then you should have done that when you first saw me. But then, of course, the English don't consider it sporting to kill in cold blood, do they?
James Bond: Don't count on that.
James Bond: Pistols at dawn; it's a little old-fashioned, isn't it?
Francisco Scaramanga: That it is. But it remains the only true test for gentlemen.
James Bond: On that score, I doubt you qualify. However, I accept.
James Bond: Good evening. My name is Bond, James Bond. Your dancing is superb - and so are you.
Saida: Merci. And you are very handsome.
Waiter: [Bond's waiter shows him the wine label] With the compliments...
James Bond: PHUYUCK?
Waiter: '74, sir.
James Bond: [Bond sips some wine] I approve.
Goodnight: [looking at him incredulously] You do?
James Bond: Oh, not the wine, your frock. Tight in all the right places, not too many buttons.
Goodnight: Standard uniform for Southeast Asia. The buttons are down the back.
James Bond: Designed by Q no doubt. One of them is a suicide pill I suppose?
Goodnight: No, but the bottom one has a homer in it.
James Bond: How original.
Saida: Ah! I've lost my charm!
James Bond: Not from where I'm standing.
James Bond: Did you see who shot him?
Saida: No, I was in his arms. My eyes were closed.
James Bond: Well, at least he died happy.
Francisco Scaramanga: How do you like my island, Mr Bond?
James Bond: A bit off the beaten track, isn't it?
James Bond: [Getting into bed] Now, where were we?
[Embrace and Kiss]
Goodnight: Oh, James! Mmmm!
[Bond sees a phone rising up on the nightstand]
Goodnight: What's the matter?
James Bond: Something came up.
[Bond picks up phone]
James Bond: Hello?
M: [Speaking over the phone] Ah, there you are, Bond. Well done, congratulations.
James Bond: Thank you, sir.
M: Is Miss Goodnight with you? I'd like a word with her.
James Bond: Hold on, sir.
[Bond sets phone down and goes back to kissing Goodnight]
M: Bond? Bond, are you there? Goodnight?
James Bond: [Bond picks up the phone] She's just coming, sir.
[Bond sets phone back down]
Goodnight: [In the background] Mmmm.
M: Goodnight? Goodnight?
James Bond: [Bond picks up the phone again] Good night, sir.
[Hangs up the phone]
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: What's goin' on with you? What the hell you doin' now, boy? The bridge is that way!
[Sheriff Pepper sees Bond is about to drive over a wrecked bridge]
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: You're not gonna...
James Bond: [mimicking Pepper's Southern accent] I sure am, boy! Ever hear of Evel Knievel?
Francisco Scaramanga: My name is Scaramanga. Francisco Scaramanga. I feel I know you, although I never thought we would ever really meet. But it has been a pleasure for me to finally meet you Mr. Bond, thanks to Miss Anders here.
James Bond: You have a strange way of showing your gratitude.
Francisco Scaramanga: A mistress cannot serve two masters. She was a difficult shot, but most gratifying.
James Bond: We all get our jollies one way or another.
Francisco Scaramanga: Mine has always been guns, Mr. Bond.
[James is sitting in the car]
James Bond: Goodnight! Where are the car keys?
Goodnight: [from inside Scaramanga's trunk] Oh, I've got the keys. And I've got the Solex too!
[M stares in shock as Bond relays news of his foul-up]
James Bond: And that is really all there is to report, sir.
M: So if I heard correctly, Scaramanga got away - in a car that sprouted wings!
Q: Oh, that's perfectly feasible, sir. As a matter of fact, we're working on one now.
M: Oh, Q, shut up! Miss Goodnight was in the boot.
James Bond: Yes, sir. We found the carplane abandonned about two hundred miles west of Bangkok.
M: And the Solex?
Lieutenant Hip: In Goodnight's handbag, sir.
M: [shakes head] Where's Miss Goodnight now?
James Bond: Well, we don't know sir. Communications aren't picking up the signal from the homer she was supplied by Q.
Q: [indignantly] Rubbish! They're simply not stepping up the reception sufficiently to enable...
M: [cuts him off] Oh, shut up! Of all the fouled-up, half-witted operations...
Colthorpe: [trying to trace origins of a golden bullet] Lazar?
Q: Lazar? Hmm, imaginative, highly specialised... Yes! I concur.
James Bond: Well, what the hell is Lazar?
Colthorpe: Not "what", "who". Portuguese. Lives in Macau.
Q: Chap who made the bullet, 007!
James Bond: Scaramanga does not have any contract out on me. He couldn't have missed me tonight. Instead, he hit some chap coming out of the club. I got quite a shock when I saw who it was.
M: I should think you did.
James Bond: Our missing solar-energy expert, Gibson.
M: Yes, Gibson! He was prepared to come back, under special terms. That's why I'm out here with Professor Frazier. I almost wish that Scaramanga had a contract out on you.
James Bond: Moneypenny - Fairbanks.
James Bond: No, Bill Fairbanks, 002.
Moneypenny: [Sadly] Oh, poor Bill. I miss him.
James Bond: Yeah, well the man with the golden gun didn't.
Moneypenny: Officially that was never confirmed.
James Bond: Where was 002 when it happened?
Moneypenny: Beirut. '69. In a cabaret with a lady called Saida
Francisco Scaramanga: You see, Mr Bond, like every great artist, I want to create an indisputable masterpiece, once in my lifetime: the death of 007. Mano a mano. Face to Face. Will me mine.
James Bond: You mean - stuffed and displayed at your rocky mantelpiece?
Francisco Scaramanga: It's an amusing idea, but I was thinking in terms of history.
[Bond returns having dealt with the murderous Nick Nack]
Goodnight: Oh, James. You didn't!
James Bond: Yes, I damn well did!
Francisco Scaramanga: This is the part I really like.
[Scaramanga destroys Bond's sea plane with a solar-powered weapon]
Francisco Scaramanga: Now that's what I call solar power.
James Bond: That's what I call trouble.
[on the dead Andrea Anders]
Francisco Scaramanga: Forget the girl, she's replaceable. Eventually, I shall find what she stole from me. Personally, I've got nothing against you, Mr. Bond, and to keep it that way... let us hope our paths never cross again. Please don't try to follow me.
James Bond: Your peanut-toting friend back there wouldn't like it?
Francisco Scaramanga: No, he wouldn't.
James Bond: Good morning. How's the water?
Chew Mee: Why don't you come in and find out?
James Bond: Sounds very tempting, Miss...?
Chew Mee: Chew Mee.
James Bond: Really? Well, there's only one small problem. I have no swimming trunks.
Chew Mee: Neither have I.
[Seeing Andrea Anders dead, Bond begins looking through her purse for the Solex device]
James Bond: Darling, it must be in your handbag. I saw the man at the shop give it to you.
[Scaramanga appears and sits beside Bond who takes little notice]
James Bond: [to Scaramanga] Sorry for what it must look like. Without the ticket, we can't get a recpit for customs.
Francisco Scaramanga: You woun't find it in there, Mr. Bond. I looked before you came.
[alarmed, Bond is going to draw his gun against Scaramanga]
Francisco Scaramanga: I wouldn't do that either. Look behind you.
[Bond turns around, but sees no one]
Francisco Scaramanga: Lower.
[Bond looks down and realizes Nick Nack is behind him with a small pistol and a bag of peanuts in his hands]
James Bond: A gun in a bag of peanuts, how original. What will they think of next?
Nick-nack: [after Bond sticks him into a suitcase] I'll kill you if you don't let me out of there! Agh! Let me out! You big bully!
James Bond: Shut up!
[Goodnight, a prisoner on Scaramanga's island, appears in a bikini]
Francisco Scaramanga: Ah, here's Miss Goodnight now.
James Bond: Aren't we a little overdressed, Goodnight?
Francisco Scaramanga: [at lunch] Let us see what Nick Nack has for us. Ahh, mushrooms!
Goodnight: [sharply, to Bond] The fried mushroom looks terribly interesting.
James Bond: Yes, I had noticed that. I'll get around to it later.
Andrea Anders: [kissing Bond] I've dreamed about you setting me free...
James Bond: I've, uh, been dreaming about a Solex agitator. Ever heard of one?
M: What do you know about a man called Scaramanga, 007?
James Bond: Scaramanga? Oh, yes! The man with the golden gun. Born in the circus. Father - the Ringmaster, possibly Cuban. Mother - English, a snake charmer. He was a spectacular trick shot artist by the time he was ten and a local Rio gunman at fifteen. The KGB recruited him there and trained him in Europe where he became an - overworked, underpaid assassin. He went independent in the late '50s. Current price: one million dollars a hit. No photograph on file. But, he does have one distinguishing feature, however, a superfluous papilla.
M: A what?
James Bond: A mammary gland. A third nipple, sir. He uses a golden bullet, hence man with the golden gun. Present domicile - unknown.
M: I'm relieving you of your present assignment, 007.
James Bond: Sir, the energy crisis is still with us. I respectfully submit that finding Gibson and his solar cell data is even more important than ever.
M: It is in deed. And I can't jeopardize it... by having Scaramanga pop up and put a bullet in you.
James Bond: Moneypenny, you are better than a computer.
Moneypenny: In all sorts of ways! But, you never take advantage of them.
Saida: Let us forget the past.
James Bond: Oh, I was hoping you would say that.
Saida: Are you staying long in Beirut?
James Bond: It depends.
James Bond: [On his knees, kissing belly dancer Saida's belly] You really do have a - magnificent abdomen.
James Bond: Do you work for him?
Andrea Anders: I don't work for him. I'm his - eh, I'm his...
James Bond: So, he's a lover too.
Andrea Anders: Only before he kills.
James Bond: Bullfighters do the same thing. They claim it improves the eye. His eyes are on me. Where can I find him?
James Bond: Let's drink to that. Bottom's up!
James Bond: Q, I'll need this.
[Writes something down on a piece of paper and hands it to Q]
Q: Really, 007!
James Bond: Oh, I admit it's a little kinky.
Lieutenant Hip: Don't tell me you saw him?
James Bond: He even invited me to dinner! He must have found me quite titillating.
[Reaches in his shirt and throws away his fake nipple]
Goodnight: Please hurry back.
James Bond: I'll ring as soon as I do. A midnight snack might be just the thing.
Goodnight: I'll keep the wine properly chilled.
James Bond: And everything else warm, I trust.
James Bond: [Toast to Goodnight] To this moment - and the moment yet to come.
[They clink their champagne glasses]
James Bond: Our profession, I'm afraid, you - never can count on that moment to come. Who knows where you and I will be this time next year?
James Bond: If Hip doesn't come up with a lead, there's really nothing very much for us to do tonight - - - or, is there?
Goodnight: Oh, darling, I'm tempted. But, killing a few hours as one of your passing fancies, isn't quite my scene.
James Bond: Goodnight, what a pleasant surprise.
Goodnight: My hard to get act didn't last very long, did it?
James Bond: I'm trained to expect the unexpected; but, I never prepared for anything like you in the night.
[Shows her his bed]
Goodnight: [In bed] James, I thought this would never happen.
James Bond: What made you change your mind?
Goodnight: I'm weak.
Andrea Anders: I've come to warn you. You're in great danger.
James Bond: I usually am.
Andrea Anders: He's a monster. I hate him.
James Bond: Then leave him.
Andrea Anders: You don't walk out on Scaramanga. There's no place he wouldn't find me.
James Bond: You need a good lawyer.
Andrea Anders: I need 007.
Andrea Anders: I want him dead. Name your price. Anything. I'll pay it. You can have me too, if you like. I'm not unattractive.
James Bond: At last, you're starting to tell the truth.
James Bond: [Talking on a walkie-talkie] Goodnight, where are you?
Goodnight: Somebody locked me in a boot.
James Bond: In a what?
Goodnight: The midget's car. I'm locked in!
Nick-nack: Bon jour, Mr. Bond. I am Nick-nack. Dom Perignon - soixante quatre.
James Bond: I prefer the '62 myself.
Nick-nack: Monsieur, what'd you think?
James Bond: I've never killed a midget before. But, there can always be a first time.
Nick-nack: Oh, monsieur.
Goodnight: James! James!
James Bond: Steady, Goodnight.
Goodnight: Where is he?
James Bond: Flat on his coup de grÃ¢ce. Come on, let's get out of this fun palace and find that solex.
James Bond: You wait here. I'll take care of the maintenance man.
Goodnight: I already did. I laid him out cold!
James Bond: You did?
James Bond: There's more to you than meets the eye, Goodnight.
James Bond: Goodnight, are you still there? It'll be on the auxiliary feedback circuit.
Goodnight: Computer interlock? Is that it?
James Bond: Just push every damn button will you!
Goodnight: [Aboard a Chinese Junk] But, darling, who's at the wheel?
James Bond: George.
James Bond: Automatic pilot. We should make Hong Kong in about - eight hours - give or take a little.
Goodnight: [Bond approaches Goodnight laying naked in a bed] I always wanted to take a slow boat *from* China.
[Bond has jumped into a car that Sheriff Pepper was checking inside a dealership. He drives through the dealership window & takes off in pursuit of Scaramanga & Nick Nack, who kidnapped Mary Goodnight and are holding her in the trunk of their car]
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: [caught off guard as Bond turns the car around] What the hell is going on?
[Bond starts a wild pursuit of Scaramanga & Nick Nack; Pepper suddenly recognizes Bond]
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: Now... I know you!
[points at Bond. Bond glances up and recognizes Pepper from the previous film 'Live and Let Die']
James Bond: Oh, no!
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: You're that Secret Agent! That English secret agent! From England! You're chasin' somebody. Who you got this time, boy? Commies? Let's go get 'em! I'm with you all the way!
[Bond & Pepper continue chasing Scaramanga through Bangkok traffic]
Andrea Anders: Ow! You're hurting my arm!
James Bond: I'll break it unless you tell me what I want.
James Bond: Red wine with fish. Well that should have told me something.
Donald "Red" Grant: You may know the right wines, but you're the one on your knees. How does it feel old man?
Tatiana: I think my mouth is too big.
James Bond: I think it's a very lovely mouth. It's just the right size - for me anyway!
Donald 'Red' Grant: Klebb works for SPECTRE now. The girl doesn't know that.
James Bond: Well, then I kill her?
Donald 'Red' Grant: Orders. That's only half of it, old man. Here's a roll of film. She'll have this in her handbag. And on you, they'll find this letter. It's from her. Planning to give the film to the press unless you marry her for helping you get the Lektor.
James Bond: What film?
Donald 'Red' Grant: Taken in the bridal suite at your hotel. Something else the girl didn't know about. Or you.
James Bond: That must have been a pretty sick collection of minds to dream up a plan like that.
Donald 'Red' Grant: Wish you'd see the headlines, "British agent murders beautiful Russian spy, then commits suicide."
James Bond: Tell me, which lunatic asylum did they get you out of?
Donald 'Red' Grant: [angered] Don't make it tougher on yourself!
[Grant slaps Bond across the face]
Donald 'Red' Grant: My orders are to kill you and deliver the Lektor. How I do it is my business. It'll be slow and painful.
James Bond: Pardon me, do you have a match?
Kerim's Chauffeur: I use a lighter.
James Bond: Better still.
Kerim's Chauffeur: Until they go wrong.
James Bond: Exactly.
Tatiana: Horrible, horrible woman.
James Bond: Yes, she had her kicks.
Tatiana: [trying on dresses] I will wear this one in Picadilly.
James Bond: You won't. They've just passed some new laws there.
James Bond: Your clock, is it correct?
Russian Clerk: Always.
James Bond: But of course.
[he walks away, checks his watch, then comes back]
James Bond: Excuse me, you did say your clock was correct?
Russian Clerk: Russian clocks are always...
[the hidden tear-gas bomb explodes]
[When the two Gypsy girls are brought out to fight, Vavra addresses the tribe in the Romani Gypsy language]
Kerim Bey: [translating] The women will fight until one of them is dead or surrenders. The winner will marry the man they both love, the loser will be cast out of the tribe, never to return. If both quit, the elders of the tribe will then decide who will marry the chief's son.
[speaking Romani, Vida lets out a long string of curses, glaring venomously at Zora]
Kerim Bey: She's saying that...
James Bond: Yes, I think I got it without the subtitles.
[on seeing Kerim Bey's office in shambles]
James Bond: Well... who won?
Kerim Bey: I had visitors. Limpet mine on the wall outside - timed to catch me at my desk. But by good fortune, I was relaxing on the settee for a few moments. The girl left in hysterics.
James Bond: Found your technique too violent?
James Bond: There's a saying in England: Where there's smoke, there's fire.
James Bond: [in atypical self-effacement] Suppose when she meets me in the flesh I-I don't come up to expectations?
M: Just see that you do.
Tatiana: [Bond first meets Tatiana, who has crawled naked into his hotel bed] You look surprised. I thought you were expecting me.
James Bond: So, you're Tatiana Romanova.
Tatiana: My friends call me Tania.
James Bond: Mine call me James Bond.
[Moneypenny, M, and other officials are listening to Bond's taped interview of Tatiana Romanova]
Tatiana: The mechanism is... Oh James, James... Will you make love to me all the time in England?
James Bond: Day and night. Go on about the mechanism.
Tatiana: [removes ring and hands it to Bond] Here you are. In case you ever need it again.
James Bond: Oh, yes. All government property has to be accounted for. But as I said before, we won't always be working on the company's time. Will we?
[Tatiana kisses Bond passionately]
Tatiana: James, behave yourself. We are being filmed.
James Bond: Oh, not again.
[Bond pulls a film reel from his pocket and unwinds it]
James Bond: He was right, you know.
Tatiana: What is it?
James Bond: I'll show you.
[Bond kisses Tatiana and throws the film away]
[after shooting down a SPECTRE helicopter]
James Bond: I'd say one of their aircraft is missing.
Man in a Punt: Great sport, this!
Woman in a Punt: What?
Man in a Punt: I said, it's great sport, this punting!
[Their punt passes another one beached behind some reeds, where James and Sylvia are making out]
James Bond: I couldn't agree with him more.
Sylvia Trench: Mmm, I may even give up golf for it.
James Bond: You're one of the most beautiful girls I've ever seen.
Tatiana: Thank you, but I think my mouth is too big.
James Bond: No, it's the right size... for me, that is.
James Bond: Now, listen, just do as I say, will you?
Tatiana: Yes, James.
[James slaps Tatiana on the fanny]
Tatiana: But, there are some English customs - that are going to be changed.
James Bond: But, of course, darling.
[Tatiana playfully laughs]
[refering to the irriating catchphrase Grant keeps repeating]
James Bond: "Old man?" Is that what you chaps in SMERSH call each other?
Donald "Red" Grant: SMERSH? I'm not with them.
James Bond: [after a pause] Of course... SPECTRE. So this wasn't a Russian show at all. You've been playing us off against each other, haven't you? So it was SPECTRE who killed that Bulgar agent in the St. Sophia mosque. Was that you?
Donald "Red" Grant: [quitely] Uh-huh.
James Bond: Kerim and the other man?
Donald "Red" Grant: Uh-huh.
James Bond: And Nash?
Donald "Red" Grant: Never mind. Oh, it's not that I don't mind talking. I get a kick out of watching you, the great James Bond, find out what a bloody fool he's been making of himself. We're pros, Mr. Bond. We sweated your little "may I borrow a match" recognition code out last month from one of your men in Tokyo before he died. Ever since your arrived in Istanbul, I've been keeping tabs on you. I've even been your guardian angel. Saved your life at the Gypsy camp.
[there is a short pause as Bond thinks back and remembers]
James Bond: Oh, yes. I'm... much obliged.
James Bond: [Playfully] Once more into the breach, dear friends.
Miss Moneypenny: And one plane ticket, lucky man. I've never been to Istanbul.
James Bond: You've never been to Istanbul? Where the moonlight on the Bosphorus is irresistible.
Miss Moneypenny: Maybe I should get you to take me there someday. I've tried everything else.
James Bond: Darling, Moneypenny, you know I've never even looked at another woman.
Miss Moneypenny: Oh, really James?
James Bond: Let me tell you the secret of the world...
[Interrupted by M]
James Bond: Let's just say that Istanbul's a rough town.
James Bond: How can a friend be in debt?
Donald "Red" Grant: Is any of the opposition around?
James Bond: Not in any condition to be worried about.
James Bond: How about a cigarette?
Donald 'Red' Grant: Not a chance.
James Bond: I'll pay for it.
Donald 'Red' Grant: What with?
James Bond: Fifty gold sovereigns.
James Bond: She should have kept her mouth shut.
James Bond: I hope you're not... disappointed.
Tatiana: I will tell you... in the morning.
Donald "Red" Grant: We were keeping you alive until you could get us the Lektor.
James Bond: So, you had me deliver it on a silver plate? That's brilliant. Go on, I'm fascinated.
Donald "Red" Grant: Now that we've got it, you and the girl are expendable... from here onto Trieste.
James Bond: The girl? Isn't she working for SPECTRE too?
Donald "Red" Grant: No. She thinks she's doing it all for Mother Russia. She takes her orders from Colonel Klebb. And so do I.
James Bond: Rosa Klebb? But Colonel Rosa Klebb is a Russian, head of operations for SMERSH.
Donald "Red" Grant: Correction: was. Klebb works for SPECTRE now. The girl doesn't know that.
James Bond: But why kill her?
Donald "Red" Grant: Orders. That's only half of it, old man.
[Grant pulls out a roll of 8mm film and an envelope from his suit pocket]
Donald "Red" Grant: Here's a roll of film. She'll have this in her handbag. And on you they'll find this letter. It's from her, threatening to give the film to the press unless you marry her for helping you steal the Lektor.
James Bond: [confused] What film?
Donald "Red" Grant: [sneers] Taken in the bridal suite at your hotel. Something else the girl didn't know about... or you.
[after tying up Benz with his own suit]
James Bond: I'm not mad about his tailor, are you?
James Bond: Sylvia, behave! We'll do this again some other time.
Sylvia Trench: Do what? Last time you said that, you went off to Jamaica.
[Starts unbuttoning James' shirt]
Sylvia Trench: I haven't seen you for six months!
Kerim Bey: Take a look. You should remember him. This man kills for pleasure.
James Bond: [Sarcastically] Nice face.
James Bond: [Calling room service at this Istanbul hotel] Hello. Breakfast for one at nine, please. Green figs. Yogurt. Coffee - very black. Thank you.
James Bond: [to Tatiana] Keep your head down.
[Sanchez is about to kill James]
Franz Sanchez: You could have had everything.
James Bond: Don't you want to know why?
[Shows Sanchez Felix's lighter, then sets Sanchez on fire]
[M confronts Bond in Key West]
M: You were supposed to be in Istanbul LAST NIGHT! I'm afraid this unfortunate Leiter business has
M: clouded your judgment! *You have a job to do*! I expect you on a plane this afternoon!
James Bond: I haven't finished here, sir.
M: Leave it to the Americans! It's their mess. Let them clear it up.
James Bond: SIR! They're not going to DO ANYTHING!
James Bond: [calms down] I owe it to Leiter. He's put his life on the line for me many times.
M: Oh SPARE ME this sentimental RUBBISH! He knew the risks.
James Bond: And his WIFE?
M: This private vendetta of yours could easily compromise Her Majesty's government. You have an assignment, and I expect you to carry it out *objectively* and *professionally*!
James Bond: Then you have my resignation, sir!
M: [incensed] We're not a country club, 007!
M: Effective immediately, your licence to kill is revoked, and I require you to hand over your weapon. Now. I need hardly remind you that you're still bound by the Official Secrets Act.
James Bond: I guess it's, uh... a farewell to arms.
[Asked why he has a gun]
James Bond: In my business you prepare for the unexpected.
Franz Sanchez: And what business is that?
James Bond: I help people with problems.
Franz Sanchez: Problem solver.
James Bond: More of a problem eliminator.
James Bond: Pam, this is Q, my "uncle". Uncle, this is "Miss Kennedy," my "cousin."
Q: Ah! We must be related.
[Bond heads for Pam's bedroom]
James Bond: Good night, Q.
Pam Bouvier: Sweet dreams, Mr. Bond.
[closes the door on him]
James Bond: [sighing] I hope you don't snore, Q.
[Killifer, who took the bribe, is dangling on a rope over shark-infested water]
Ed Killifer: There's $2 million in that suitcase. I'll split it with you.
James Bond: [menacingly] You earned it. You keep it, Old Buddy!
[Throws the case at him, knocking him into the water]
Sharkey: God, what a terrible waste.
[Bond glares at Sharkey]
Sharkey: Of money.
[Bond stops glaring]
[a fork lift truck bursts through a wall with a Heller impaled on the forks]
Pam Bouvier: Oh, God, it's Heller.
James Bond: Yeah. Looks like he came to a dead end.
[explosions are heard]
James Bond: Come on!
[Bond sees that Sharkey has been killed]
James Bond: You'd better find yourself a new lover!
Lupe Lamora: Don't you men know any other way?
James Bond: It's Sanchez's way! You seem to like it!
Ed Killifer: Freeze! Over by the trap door, old buddy.
James Bond: Is this where you put your old buddy Felix?
Ed Killifer: Not me. Chalk that one up to Sanchez and Krest.
[Bond points a harpoon at the man who killed Sharkey]
James Bond: Compliments of Sharkey!
James Bond: [Pam kisses Bond] Why don't you wait until you're asked?
Pam Bouvier: Why don't you ask me?
[kisses Bond again]
[Bond kisses Pam after jumping into a swimming pool after her]
Pam Bouvier: Why don't you wait until you're asked?
James Bond: So why don't you ask me?
[Kwang and his Hong Kong agents have captured Bond]
Kwang: Who would have a signature gun?
Fallon: James Bond.
[examines the gun]
Fallon: This is the property of Her Majesty's Government. How did *you* get it?
James Bond: Piss off!
Kwang: Who ordered you to kill Sanchez?
Fallon: No one! He's a rogue agent. I've got orders to bring him back one way or another.
Kwang: We're Hong Kong Narcotics, you BASTARD!
Kwang: Sanchez is taking us to the heart of his operations. I've been setting it up for years!
Kwang: I just hope that little stunt of yours hasn't scared him off!
James Bond: [Sanchez' army is at the hideout] Get me out of these bloody things!
Fallon: No, Commander. You're a loose cannon on deck.
Fallon: I'm shipping you straight back to London.
[Bond struggles until Sanchez' army attacks]
James Bond: This is no place for you, Q. Go home.
Q: Oh, don't be an idiot, 007. I know exactly what you're up to, and quite frankly, you're going to need my help. Remember, if it hadn't been for Q Branch, you'd have been dead long ago.
[opens a case]
Q: Everything for a man on holiday. Explosive alarm clock - guaranteed never to wake up anyone who uses it. Dentonite toothpaste - to be used sparingly, the latest in plastic explosive.
James Bond: I could do with some plastic.
Della Leiter: [kissing Bond] That's a custom, you see. The bride always gets to kiss her best man.
James Bond: I thought it was the other way around.
Della Leiter: Aww...
[kisses him again]
Della Leiter: Oh, James, would you mind? Felix is still in the study and we've got to cut this cake.
James Bond: I'll do anything for a woman with a knife.
[their boat just died]
Pam Bouvier: Out of Gas. I haven't heard that one in a long time.
James Bond: Well, they must have hit the fuel line.
James Bond: [aiming the signiture gun at Sanchez's office window] Watch the birdy, you bastard.
[after a gunfight with henchmen]
Felix Leiter: [to Bond] Hey, observer! You trying to get yourself killed?
James Bond: If I don't get you back in time for the wedding, I'm a dead man for sure!
Hawkins: Local cops got a tip about a warehouse last night. Turned up 500 keys of Colombian pure, couple of stiffs, and a little bit of piece of what used to be Killifer.
James Bond: Good. At least someone's on the case.
Hawkins: You may be a pal of Leiter's, but I can only cover up so much. The DEA is screaming to know what happened. You know, we... we've got laws in this country, too.
James Bond: Do you have a law against what they did to Leiter?
[a couple of men arrive to escort Bond]
Hawkins: Look... you're in over your head. This is where it ends, Commander.
[Sharkey asks about Felix]
Sharkey: How is he?
James Bond: His left leg's gone below the knee. But they might be able to save his arm.
Rasmussen: You can bet it was a chainsaw. Colombians love to use them on informers. Hell, they sell more here than the state of Oregon.
Sharkey: Chainsaw my ass. I know a shark bite when I see one.
[Pam saves Bond from Dario, who is then violently decimated in a crushing machine]
Pam Bouvier: Are you all right?
James Bond: SWITCH THE BLOODY MACHINE OFF!
Felix Leiter: There's only one law down there. Sanchez's Law! Plomo o Plata.
James Bond: [nodding] Lead or Silver.
[after Bond has introduced Pam as his executive secretary Miss Kennedy]
Pam Bouvier: It's *Ms. Kennedy*. And why can't you be *my* executive secretary?
James Bond: We're south of the border. It's a man's world.
James Bond: Bond, James Bond
James Bond: Miss Kennedy would you get me a medium-dry Vodka Martini?
Pam Bouvier: Why don't you ask...
James Bond: Shaken! Not stirred.
Ticket Agent: [At the Pan Am ticket counter] Your passport please.
James Bond: What's going on?
Ticket Agent: Some big drug dealer just escaped. Now, will that be smoking or non-smoking, mister...?
[Bond leaves quickly]
Ticket Agent: Your ticket!
Dario: La Senorita Bouvier, don't I know you from somewhere?
Pam Bouvier: No.
Dario: Oh, yes I do. You used to fly charter planes for some friends of mine. I got a job for you.
[Dario grabs her arm]
Dario: Why don't we go outside and we talk in private.
James Bond: Take your hands off her! She's with me.
Dario: Nobody's asking you gringo.
Pam Bouvier: [she has a shotgun aimed at his groin] He's with *me*! Keep your hands on the table!
Pam Bouvier: Look, I just saved your life back there! If it wasn't for me your ass would have been nailed to the wall.
James Bond: You saved *my life*?
Pam Bouvier: YES!
James Bond: It's a tough business you picked, Miss Bouvier. Leave it to the professionals!
Pam Bouvier: Look, pal, I was an *Army pilot*! I have flown to the toughest hell-holes in South America and I will *not* have you lecture *me* about PROFESSIONALISM!
James Bond: You're bloody lucky to be alive!
Pam Bouvier: Its not luck, its experience.
Hotel Assistant Manager: This is the master bedroom. I hope everything is satisfactory, SeÃ±or?
James Bond: It's adequate. I'd like a case of champagne, Bollinger R.D.
Hotel Assistant Manager: Certainly, SeÃ±or.
Hotel Assistant Manager: Ah, SeÃ±or Bond. You'll be pleased to know your Uncle has arrived. I put him in your suite.
James Bond: Thank you.
[Walks away from Hotel's Front Desk]
Pam Bouvier: Your Uncle?
James Bond: Let's make this a proper family reunion. Give me your gun.
Slumber Inc. Attendant: The stiff, ehm, the deceased back there... Your brother, Mr. Franks?
James Bond: Yes, it was.
Slumber Inc. Attendant: I got a brudder.
James Bond: Small world.
[a couple of oil workers open a hatch down to the oil pipe, and James Bond comes up to their surprise]
James Bond: Thank you very much. I was just out walking my RAT and seem to have lost my way...
Sir Donald Munger: Tell me, Commander, how far does your expertise extend into the field of diamonds?
James Bond: Well, hardest substance found in nature, they cut glass, suggests marriage, I suppose it replaced the dog as the girl's best friend. That's about it.
M: Refreshing to hear that there is one subject you're not an expert on!
Felix Leiter: I give up. I know the diamonds are in the body, but where?
James Bond: Alimentary, Dr. Leiter...
[Tiffany Case opens the door almost nude]
James Bond: That's quite a nice little nothing you're almost wearing. I approve.
Tiffany Case: I don't dress for the hired help. Let's see your passport, Franks.
[Bond gives her his passport. She looks it over]
Tiffany Case: Occupation: Transport Consultant? It's a little cute isn't it? I'll finish dressing.
James Bond: Oh, please don't, not on my account.
Plenty O'Toole: Hi, I'm Plenty.
James Bond: But of course you are.
Plenty O'Toole: Plenty O'Toole.
James Bond: Named after your father perhaps?
Blofeld: Right idea, Mr. Bond...
James Bond: ...But wrong pussy.
[to a rat]
James Bond: Well, one of us smells like a tart's handkerchief.
James Bond: I'm afraid it's me. Sorry, old boy.
[Bond tastes the Mouton Rothschild wine served]
James Bond: The wine is quite excellent. Although for such a grand meal I would have expected a claret.
Mr. Wint: But of course. Unfortunately our cellar is poorly stocked with clarets.
James Bond: Mouton Rothschild IS a claret. And, I've smelled that aftershave before, and both times - I've smelled a rat.
[Bond sees Saxby gunned down after trying to assassinate Willard Whyte]
James Bond: Saxby!
Willard Whyte: Burt Saxby? Tell him he's fired!
James Bond: [Plenty O'Toole enters Bond's hotel room] Well, if you'd like to come in, Plenty.
Plenty O'Toole: Oh, how pretty, what a super place you have!
James Bond: Mmm...
[Plenty kisses him; Bond unzips her purple satin dress and it falls from her, leaving her almost completely naked except for her purple high heels and her transparent pink panties]
Plenty O'Toole: [holding up a finger, moving back] Just give me one second, lover.
[she walks into the bedroom]
James Bond: [Bond picks up her dress and tosses it onto a couch. He turns on a lamp and finds a goon pointing a gun at him] Good evening.
[other lights come on, revealing another goon, also pointing a gun at him]
James Bond: Well, I'm afraid you've caught me with more than my hands up.
Plenty O'Toole: [being forced out of the bedroom by a third goon, her arms folded across her chest protectively] Hey, what the hell is this? A pervert's convention or something?
[the other goons come over and pick her up, carrying her over to the window]
Plenty O'Toole: Now listen, you can't do this to me! Stop that! I've got friends in this town!
[she is thrown out of the window and lands in the pool]
Marie: Who are you?
James Bond: My name is Bond, James Bond.
Marie: Is there something I can do for you?
James Bond: Yes, as a matter of fact, there is. There's something I'd like you to get off your chest.
[Pulls off her bikini top and wraps it around her neck]
James Bond: Where is Ernst Stavro Blofeld? Speak up, darling, I can't hear you.
James Bond: [playing craps] I'll take the full odds on the ten, two hundred on the hard way, the limit on all the numbers, two hundred and fifty on the eleven. Thank you very much.
Plenty O'Toole: Say, you played this game before.
James Bond: Just once.
[Plenty O'Toole is thrown out of the window by some goons perhaps from the 10th floor, and lands in the middle of the hotel's swimming pool]
James Bond: [looking down] Exceptionally fine shot.
Slumber Inc. Attendant: I didn't know there was a pool down there.
[to Tiffany, as he turns the lights out and gets in bed with her]
James Bond: Presumably I'm the condemned man and obviously you're the hearty breakfast.
James Bond: Good morning, gentlemen. ACME pollution inspection. We're cleaning up the world, we thought this was a suitable starting point.
James Bond: Weren't you a blonde when I came in?
Tiffany Case: Could be.
James Bond: I tend to notice little things like that - whether a girl is a blonde or a brunette.
Tiffany Case: Which do you prefer?
James Bond: Well, as long as the collar and cuffs match.
Tiffany Case: We'll talk about that later.
James Bond: Anyone seeing you in that outfit, Moneypenny, would most certainly be discouraged from leaving the country. What can I bring you back from Holland?
Miss Moneypenny: A diamond? In a ring?
James Bond: Would you settle for a tulip?
Miss Moneypenny: [Bond leaves; she sighs longingly] Yes!
[Plenty O'Toole is found face down in a swimming pool]
Tiffany Case: She's...
James Bond: Dead. Supposed to be you. The next link in the "pipeline".
Tiffany Case: What are you talking about?
James Bond: Poor Plenty must have stumbled in here looking for you.
Tiffany Case: I don't believe you!
James Bond: A dentist is dead in South Africa. That little old lady in Amsterdam. Shady got his last night. They've missed me once. And you're next. Now, who's your connection?
Tiffany Case: You sound like a cop to me...
James Bond: Who's your connection?
Tiffany Case: All I know, his voice is on a phone. They got me this place and told me to wait for further instructions.
James Bond: You'll find that rather difficult to hear underwater.
James Bond: [tossing Japanese man around] Where is he? I shan't ask you politely next time. Where is Blofeld?
Japanese man: Cai... Cai... Cairo!
Tiffany Case: Oh, James.
James Bond: Oh, yes. What were you about to ask me?
Tiffany Case: James, how the hell do we get those diamonds down again?
James Bond: Surely, sir, there's no need to involve our section on a relatively simple smuggling matter.
M: Sir Donald has convinced the PM otherwise. May I remind you 007, that Blofeld is dead. Finished! The least we can expect from you now is a little *plain*, *solid*, *work*.
Tiffany Case: [reading Bond's ID card planted on the deceased Franks] My God! You just killed James Bond!
James Bond: Is that who it was? Well just goes to show, no one's indestructible.
James Bond: Tiffany Case? Definitely distinctive.
Tiffany Case: I was born there, on the first floor, while my mother was looking for a wedding ring.
James Bond: Well, I'm glad for your sake it wasn't Van Cleef & Arpels.
James Bond: Pity about your liver, sir. Unusually fine Solera. '51, I believe.
M: There is no year for sherry, 007.
James Bond: I was referring to the original vintage on which the sherry is based, sir. 1851, unmistakable.
Sir Donald Munger: Precisely.
[Bond has shoved a tape in the rear end of Tiffany's bikini bottom]
James Bond: Bitch. Your problems are all behind you now.
Sir Donald Munger: You have been on holiday, I understand. Relaxing, I hope?
James Bond: Oh, hardly relaxing, but most satisfying.
Tiffany Case: Listen, you can drop me off at the next corner. This whole thing is getting a little out of hand. No regrets, but when you start stealing moon machines from Willard Whyte, GOOD bye and GOOD Luck!
James Bond: Just relax, I have a friend named Felix who can fix anything.
Tiffany Case: Is he married?
[after being pulled over by the sherriff]
Tiffany Case: [sarcastically] Relax, you've got a friend named Felix who can fix anything.
James Bond: Unfortunately, so can Willard Whyte.
James Bond: What do you intend to do with those diamonds?
Blofeld: An excellent question. And one which will be hanging on the lips of the world quite soon. If I were to break the news to anyone it would be to you first, Mr Bond, you know that.
Blofeld: Good evening, Mr Bond.
James Bond: Blofeld?
Blofeld Double: Good evening, 007.
Blofeld: Double jeopardy, Mr Bond.
Tiffany Case: Darling, why are we suddenly staying in the Bridal Suite at the Whyte House?
James Bond: In order to form a more perfect union, sweetheart.
Bambi: [seductively] I'm "Bambi."
Thumper: And I am "Thumper." Is there something we can do for you?
James Bond: I can think of several things, off hand...
James Bond: Welcome to Hell, Blofeld.
James Bond: Well, that's a neat trick.
James Bond: Klaus Hergersheimer, checking radation badges... Klaus Hergersheimer... checking radiation badges?
Mr. Slumber: Mr. Franks? I'm Morton Slumber. Please accept my heartfelt condolences at this most difficult hour
James Bond: [as Peter Franks] Well, he is heading for a better world, Mr. Slumber. There's some consolation in that.
Mr. Slumber: Now then, if we're ready to begin the final journey...
[actives control panel]
Mr. Slumber: [Ethereal music rises, curtains part, and the casket travels on a short conveyer through a small hatchway into the cremation furnace]
Mr. Slumber: [cutting off music abruptly] Ah- May his soul rest in peace.
James Bond: Oh, yes... yes, Amen.
Mr. Slumber: Now if you would care to follow me into my comfortable office Mr. Franks, we will bring you the urn... Oh, I'm so happy you chose our Half-couch Hinge-panel Slumber-on Casket. I'm sure your brother would have appreciated it
James Bond: Oh, I'm sure he did.
[a knock on the door; Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd, posing as host and a steward, brings into the couple's suite a romantic dinner]
James Bond: [puzzled] There must be some mistake. I didn't order any...
Mr. Wint: No mistake, sir. On specific instructions and with the complements of Mr. Willard Whyte: Oysters Andaluz, Shashlik, Tidbits, Prime rib au jus, Salade Utopia...
[Mr. Kidd sets the timer for the bomb in the fake La Bombe Surprise]
Mr. Wint: ...and for dessert, the piece de resistance...
[Mr. Kidd shows the fake dessert]
Mr. Wint: La Bombe Surprise.
Tiffany Case: Mmm! That's looks fantastic. What's in it?
Mr. Wint: Ah, but then there would be no surprise, Madame.
M: Star of South Africa. 83.5 carats rough. 47.5 carats cut. The Akbar Shah. 116 carats rough. Are you paying attention 007?
James Bond: The Akbar Shah. 116 carats rough.
Tiffany Case: [Bond, posing as Peter Franks, calling on an intercom] Yes?
James Bond: Franks, Peter Franks.
Tiffany Case: Come up, third floor.
Tiffany Case: Is he dead?
James Bond: I sincerely hope so.
Tiffany Case: Sorry about your fulsome friend. I bet you really missed something.
James Bond: Well, the evening may not be a total loss, after all.
Tiffany Case: Why don't we talk a bit first.
James Bond: Well, what would like to talk about?
Tiffany Case: You pick a subject.
James Bond: Diamonds.
James Bond: Felix, if she gives your men the slip...
Felix Leiter: Relax, I've got upwards of 30 agents down there. A mouse with sneakers on couldn't get through.
James Bond: Nice place you have here. Take something off. Enjoy the sun.
Tiffany Case: You've got a lot of guts showing up here! After letting me freeze my behind off at a blackjack table for two hours waiting for some nonexistent diamonds! And what the hell is my black wig doing in the pool?
[underwater shot of a dead Plenty O'Toole]
Tiffany Case: [sober] She's...
James Bond: Dead. Supposed to be you. The next link in the pipeline.
Felix Leiter: Miss Tiffany Case *Jones* has a lifetime reservation at another hotel - the kind the government - runs.
Tiffany Case: I cooperating, Mr. Leiter, really I am.
James Bond: Oh, I can vouch for that!
James Bond: And, eh, that's all there is to it?
Thumper: Not quite. First, we're going to have a ball!
[Knees Bond in the crotch]
Blofeld: I'm so sorry to have ruined the line of your suit for nothing.
James Bond: Talking about lines, which one did you use on Miss Case?
Blofeld: Miss Case has taken a terribly *reasonable* attitude about all this. Like any sensible animal, she's only threatening when she's threatened.
James Bond: It appears that you're holding all the aces - right down to the dragon lady, over here.
Blofeld: Jealousy? From you, Mr. Bond? I'm flattered.
James Bond: Still here, Moneypenny? You should be in bed.
Miss Moneypenny: James, we *both* should be!
Fatima Blush: You know that making love to Fatima was the greatest pleasure of your life.
James Bond: Well, to be perfectly honest, there was this girl in Philadelphia...
Fatima Blush: SHUT UP!
Fatima Blush: Write! Now write this: "The greatest rapture in my life was afforded to me on a boat in Nassau by Fatima Blush." Sign: "James Bond, 007."
James Bond: I just remembered. It's against Service policy for agents to give endorsements.
Fatima Blush: *Write*!
James Bond: Right now?
Fatima Blush: Right - now.
Nurse: Mr. Bond, I need a urine sample. If you could fill this beaker for me?
James Bond: From here?
Largo: Do you lose as gracefully as you win?
James Bond: I don't know, I've never lost.
M: I send you to a health farm to get yourself in shape! Instead you DEMOLISH it! Now I've had to notify the local police, get a minister to muzzle the press, and allocate a sizable chunk of my meager budget to renovating the establishment!
James Bond: A man DID try to kill me, sir.
M: Oh! Caught you seducing his wife, did he?
James Bond: No, sir, not at all. But, in fact, I did lose 4 lbs and God knows how many free radicals.
M: [slams the table] That is the KIND of attitude that tempts me to suspend you, 007!
M: Too many free radicals. That's your problem.
James Bond: "Free radicals," sir?
M: Yes. They're toxins that destroy the body and the brain, caused by eating too much red meat and white bread. Too many dry martinis!
James Bond: Then I shall cut out the white bread, sir.
M: Oh, you'll do more than THAT, 007. From now on you will be suffering a strict regimen of diet and exercise; we shall PURGE those toxins from you!
James Bond: Shrublands?
M: You got it!
Q: Good to see you Mr. Bond. Things've been awfully dull 'round here. Bureaucrats running the whole place. Everything done by the book. Can't make a decision unless the computer gives you the go ahead. Now you're on this. I hope we're going to have some gratuitous sex and violence!
James Bond: I certainly hope so too.
[Fatima Blush lands in James Bond's arms when she water-skis up the ramp to the bar]
Fatima Blush: Oh, how reckless of me. I made you all wet.
James Bond: Yes, but my martini is still dry. My name is James.
Miss Moneypenny: Have you got an assignment, James?
James Bond: Yes, Moneypenny. I'm to eliminate all free radicals.
Miss Moneypenny: Ooh. Do be careful.
[Small-Fawcett is thrown into the pool by James Bond]
Small-Fawcett: I'm sorry Mr. Bond. I obviously caught you in a bad moment.
James Bond: M sent you!
Small-Fawcett: Only to plead for your return, Sir. M says that without you in the service, he fears for the security of the civilized world.
James Bond: Never again.
Domino Petachi: Never?
[they hug and Bond winks to the audience]
Largo: Are you a man who enjoys games?
James Bond: Depends with whom I'm playing.
James Bond: My name is Bond.
Patricia: Oh, you're Mr. Bond. I believe I'm having you in half an hour.
James Bond: Oh, splendid. Your room or mine?
Patricia: Lentil delight, dandelion salad, goat's cheese.
James Bond: Beluga caviar, quails eggs, vodka, foie gras - Strasbourg.
Doctor at Shrublands: Miss Fearing tells me you're making fine progress. But, I must say, you're looking a bit peaked this morning.
James Bond: I was up all night.
Doctor at Shrublands: Don't overdo it. A herbal enema should fix you up.
James Bond: What's the Americans' story on how the damn things were stolen?
James Bond: Is it conceivable that he could have used a false eye?
M: Oh, do come along, Bond! Let's think of a more logical explanation, shall we?
James Bond: We're both humble servants of the Crown, Alge.
Q: If the CIA made me an offer, I'd be off like a shot! Unlimited resources. Air conditioning. Twenty-eight flavors of ice cream in the restaurant.
Q: Rather tasty this is. It looks like a watch, but, it's really a laser. It keeps perfect time.
James Bond: But, for how long?
Q: At least your lifetime.
James Bond: I won't need one of these where I'm going.
Q: Where's that or - are you not allowed to say?
James Bond: The Bahamas.
Q: Oh, lucky, bloody you!
Small-Fawcett: Nigel Small-Fawcett. British Embassy. Nassau.
James Bond: How do you do, Nigel?
Small-Fawcett: Sorry I'm late. But, as you're one of these undercover johnnies, I took the precaution of not being followed.
James Bond: And that's why you shouted my name across the harbor.
Small-Fawcett: Oh, God! Did I? Oh, I'm sorry. Damn! Damn! Sorry, I'm rather new to all this.
James Bond: What's the score with Largo?
Small-Fawcett: Oh, he's highly visible in these parts. Enormously wealthy. Owns the biggest boat in the Caribbean...
James Bond: You've met him?
Small-Fawcett: Yes. He's charming. I mean - foreign. But, charming, nonetheless.
Small-Fawcett: You're not going to make any trouble, are you Mr. Bond? Let's face it. Your reputation has proceeded you.
James Bond: Do I look like the sort of man who would make trouble?
Small-Fawcett: Well, yes, frankly. And you're going to jeopardize the tourists trade if you start going around killing people.
Fatima Blush: Hello, James. I'm Fatima Blush.
James Bond: You ski very well.
Fatima Blush: I do many things very well.
James Bond: You're marvelously well equipped.
Fatima Blush: Thank you, James. So are you.
James Bond: What exactly are we going down for?
Fatima Blush: Sport - and a little fun.
James Bond: You appear tense.
Fatima Blush: You affect me, James.
James Bond: Well, that's bad. Going down, one should always be relaxed.
James Bond: Is it far to the reef?
Fatima Blush: It's far enough. We've got time to kill.
Leiter: It's gonna be your ass, James.
James Bond: Thank you.
Receptionist at Health Spa: Bon jour, Monsieur.
James Bond: Do you serve men here?
Receptionist at Health Spa: But, of course. Some men more than others.
James Bond: Now, hard or soft - massage?
Domino Petachi: Hard, please.
James Bond: C'est la vie.
Domino Petachi: C'est la vie?
James Bond: Such is life.
Domino Petachi: Such is life.
Domino Petachi: That feels *so* good.
James Bond: It certainly does.
Domino Petachi: Oh! Could you go a little lower, please.
James Bond: Lower?
Domino Petachi: Yes, please. Yes. Oh, right there. Oh, it feels *so* good!
James Bond: Hello, again. I do owe you an explanation. My name is Bond, James Bond. May I offer you a drink?
James Bond: Vodka on the rocks, please.
James Bond: Your brother's dead. Keep dancing!
Largo: So, a drink?
James Bond: Vodka martini.
Largo: Of course.
James Bond: With due respect, I played the war games for two weeks and only got killed once.
M: Twice. You've forgotten the land mine on the Black Sea beach.
James Bond: Correction, sir. I lost both legs. I did not die.
M: [Unimpressed] You were *immobilized.*
James Bond: It can never be the same playing with blanks. It is somewhat different in the field. With your life on the line... your adrenaline gives you an edge.
M: But is your edge sharp enough? That's the difference between a "Double-0" and a corpse.
James Bond: Since you took over, sir, you've had little use for the "Double-O"s. I've spent most of my time teaching, not doing.
M: It's no secret I hold your methods in much less regard than my illustrious predecessor did. But my duty is to keep you up to par.
James Bond: [about one of Q's spy gadgets: a pen that shoots a lethally explosive charge] You could write a very binding contract with this.
James Bond: [In the lab, curious about yet another one of Q's interesting little spy gadgets] What is this for?
Q: I'll show you. You unscrew it... then stick it up your nose.
Q: [as he sticks the inhaler up his nose and sniffs] For my sinus.
[Bond and Drax are shooting pheasants]
Hugo Drax: You missed, Mr. Bond.
[a sniper falls from a tree]
James Bond: Did I?
James Bond: Take a giant step back for mankind.
[after shoving Drax into an air lock and ejecting him into outer space]
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Where's Drax?
James Bond: Oh, he had to fly.
Dr. Holly Goodhead: You know him?
James Bond: Not socially. His name's Jaws, he kills people.
Corinne: [while riding in a helicopter] This is the Drax estate now. Everything you see belongs to Mr. Drax.
James Bond: He owns a lot, doesn't he?
Corinne: What he doesn't own, he doesn't want.
James Bond: [drops Chang off a building and into a piano] Play it again, Sam.
[his plans in ruin and holding Bond at gunpoint]
Hugo Drax: At least I shall have the pleasure of putting you out of my misery. Poor, desolate Mr. Bond.
James Bond: [shoots Drax with hidden wrist-gun] Heartbroken Mr. Drax!
James Bond: Oh, I suppose you're right, Holly. We would be better off working together. DÃ©tente?
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Agreed.
James Bond: Understanding?
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Possibly.
James Bond: Co-operation?
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Maybe.
James Bond: Trust?
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Out of the question.
[Bond dangles from a cable car a thousand feet up]
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Hang on, James!
James Bond: The thought had occurred to me.
Miss Moneypenny: James! But, why are you so late?
James Bond: I fell out of an airplane without a parachute. Who's in there?
Miss Moneypenny: Q and the Minister of Defense.
James Bond: You don't believe me do you?
Miss Moneypenny: No. And you should go right in.
Hugo Drax: Why did you break up the encounter with my pet python?
James Bond: I discovered it had a crush on me.
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Have you broken something?
James Bond: Only my tailor's heart.
[she kisses him]
James Bond: What was that for?
Dr. Holly Goodhead: For saving my life.
James Bond: Remind me to do it more often!
James Bond: Standard CIA equipment. And the CIA placed you with Drax, correct?
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Very astute of you, James.
James Bond: Oh, not really. I have friends in low places.
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Could this possibly be the moment for us to pool our resources?
James Bond: It could have its compensations.
[Embrace and kiss]
Dr. Holly Goodhead: I still don't know if I trust you.
James Bond: I don't know if I trust you either. That's what makes it more exciting, doesn't it?
James Bond: My name is Bond, James Bond. I'm looking for Dr. Goodhead.
Dr. Holly Goodhead: You just found her.
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Come on, Mr. Bond. A 70-year-old can take 3 G's.
James Bond: Well, the trouble is there's never a 70-year-old around when you need one.
Q: [explaining operation of dart wrist-gun] It's activated by nerve impulses from the wrist muscles.
James Bond: Like this?
[dart pierces a painting on M's wall]
M: Oh, thank you, 007!
Q: Be careful, will you? Now, there's ten darts: five blue-tipped, with armour-piercing heads; five red-tipped, cyanide coated, causing death in thirty seconds.
James Bond: Very novel, Q. Must get them in the stores for Christmas. Good day, gentlemen!
James Bond: Haven't we met somewhere before?
Dr. Holly Goodhead: The face is familiar.
[he touches her hand]
Dr. Holly Goodhead: As is the manner.
Dr. Holly Goodhead: This evening I'm giving my address.
James Bond: Then can you think of a reason why we can't go for a drink afterwards?
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Not immediately. But I'm sure I shall.
Dr. Holly Goodhead: James?
James Bond: I think it may be time to go home.
Dr. Holly Goodhead: Take me 'round the world one more time.
James Bond: Why not?
James Bond: Where did you learn to fight like that? NASA?
Dr. Holly Goodhead: No. Vassar.
James Bond: [after blowing a hole in the vent with his watch] Bang on time!
Hugo Drax: Despite your efforts, my finely wrought dream approaches its fulfillment.
James Bond: Your dream, whatever sort of nightmare it is, hasn't a chance, Drax.
Hugo Drax: You think not? We shall see.
Miss Moneypenny: Why James, you look like you've just fallen off a mountain.
James Bond: Funny you should say that, Moneypenny, actually I was in a cable car. It doesn't matter.
James Bond: Do you come with the suite?
Manuela: It depends who's renting it. Vodka martini? Shaken, not stirred.
Manuela: They have a warehouse on Carioca Avenue.
James Bond: I'd like to pay it a discreet visit tonight.
Manuela: Tonight? I think you may find that a little difficult.
James Bond: Difficult or not, its something we have to do. And meanwhile, how do you kill five hours in Rio - if you don't Samba?
Q: Ah, there you are 007.
James Bond: Balls, Q?
Q: Bolos, 007.
Rio de Janeiro Hotel Manager: The President's Suite
[Hotel Manager dangles the keys with a flourish]
James Bond: Really? Well don't bother showing me the rest. If I get lost, I'll take a cab
[Hotel Manager rolls his eyes and leaves]
James Bond: And why the orchids?
Hugo Drax: The curse of a civilization. It was neither war nor pestilence that wiped out the race who built the great city lying around us. It was their reverence for this lovely flower. Because long-term exposure to its pollen caused sterility. Correct, Mr. Bond. As you discovered, I have improved upon sterility. Those same seeds now yield death. Not, of course, to animals or plant life. One must preserve the balance of nature.
Hugo Drax: Despite your efforts, my finely wrought dream approaches its fulfillment.
James Bond: Your dream, whatever sort of nightmare it is, hasn't a chance, Drax.
Hugo Drax: You think not? We shall see.
Drax Radarman 1: We're coming up to second launch position.
Hugo Drax: Launch globe number two.
Hugo Drax: No doubt you have realized the splendor of my conception. First, a necklace of death about the Earth. 50 globes, each releasing its nerve gas over a designated area, each capable of killing 100 million people. And the human race as you know it will cease to exist. Then a rebirth, a new world.
James Bond: [flying over Moonraker's expansive production facilities] Well, I'd heard that Hugo Drax is obsessed with the conquest of space. Now I can believe it.
James Bond: [looks up and is shocked to see an enormous chalet] Good Lord!
Corinne: The Drax residence. Every stone brought from France. Cute, isn't it?
James Bond: Magnificent. Why didn't he buy the Eiffel Tower as well?
Corinne: He did, but the French government refused him an export permit.
James Bond: Bollinger? If it's '69 you were expecting me.
Pilot Private Jet: This is where we leave you, Mr Bond.
James Bond: A little premature isn't it?
[Holly and James are discussing how to destroy the death globes en route to Earth]
James Bond: Moonraker 5, that's the answer. Drax's shuttle is armed with a laser. We can track those globes and destroy them.
Hugo Drax: You have arrived at a propitious moment, coincident with your country's one indisputable contribution to Western Civilization: Afternoon tea. May I press you to a cucumber sandwich?
James Bond: Thank you, no, nothing at all.
James Bond: My dear, uncooperative Domino.
Domino: How do you know that? How do you know my friends call me Domino?
James Bond: It's on the bracelet on your ankle.
Domino: So... what sharp little eyes you've got.
James Bond: Wait 'til you get to my teeth.
[Placing Fiona's body in a chair after she is shot on the dance floor]
James Bond: Do you mind if my friend sits this one out? She's just dead.
Pat Fearing: Funny-looking bruise. A fall?
James Bond: A poker, in the hands of a widow.
Pat Fearing: Really? I'd have thought you were just the type for a widow.
James Bond: Not this one. He didn't like me at all.
Domino: Vargo's behind you.
James Bond: Really...
Domino: He must have followed us.
James Bond: [shoots Vargas with a spear gun] I think he got the point.
Domino: It should have been Largo.
[after making love to the evil Fiona Volpe]
James Bond: My dear girl, don't flatter yourself. What I did this evening was for Queen and country. You don't think it gave me any pleasure, do you?
Fiona: But of course, I forgot your ego, Mr. Bond. James Bond, the one where he has to make love to a woman, and she starts to hear heavenly choirs singing. She repents, and turns to the side of right and virtue...
[she steps on Bond's foot]
Fiona: ... but not this one!
[after making love to Pat, Bond sees something suspicious on the grounds, and gets up to investigate]
Pat Fearing: James, where are you going?
James Bond: Oh, nowhere. I just thought I'd take a little, uh... exercise.
Pat Fearing: You must be joking.
Q: Now here's something I want you to use with special care. With special care.
James Bond: Everything you give me...
Q: You treat it with equal contempt. Yes, I know, but that's an underwater camera. It takes eight pictures in rapid succession by pressing that button now.
James Bond: Is that clever?
Q: If it can take pictures in the dark with an infrared film, yes.
Domino: I'm glad I killed him.
James Bond: *You're* glad?
[to the shark that almost bit him]
James Bond: You can tell of the one that got away.
Miss Moneypenny: Uh uh. In the conference room. Something pretty big. Every double-oh man in Europe's been rushed in. *And* the Home Secretary, too.
James Bond: Somebody's probably lost a dog.
[Bond shows M a picture of Dominique Derval, the Vulcan pilot's sister]
M: Do we know where she is now?
James Bond: Nassau.
M: Do you think she's worth going after?
James Bond: Well, I wouldn't put it quite like that, sir...
Felix Leiter: Well, hello Double-Oh...
[James slugs Felix to shut him up, then slugs the bad guy hiding in the shower]
Felix Leiter: Fine way to treat the CIA!
James Bond: I'm sorry about that, Felix, but you were about to say double-O seven. Here.
[James gives Felix the bad guy's gun]
Felix Leiter: Well, James, did you kill him?
James Bond: You know me better than that.
James Bond: That gun, it looks more fitting for a woman.
Emilio Largo: You know much about guns, Mr. Bond?
James Bond: No, but I know a little about women.
[Bond and Largo spot Domino eavesdropping]
Miss Moneypenny: James, how else will you recognize her?
James Bond: Can't miss. She has two moles on her left thigh.
M: I've assigned you to Station "C" Canada.
James Bond: Sir, I'd respectfully request that you change my assignment to Nassau.
M: Is there any other reason, besides your enthusiasm for water sports?
James Bond: [donning the underwater jet pack] ... and the kitchen sink.
Felix Leiter: On you, anything looks good.
Pat Fearing: What exactly do you do?
James Bond: Oh, I travel... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
[after a narrow escape from a motorized traction table set on overload]
James Bond: I must be six inches taller.
Felix Leiter: What's our next move?
James Bond: The Disco Volante. If the bombs aren't aboard, they soon will be.
Felix Leiter: Who you going to ask, Largo?
James Bond: No, we won't have to.
Emilio Largo: You wish to put the evil eye on me, eh? We have a way to deal with that where I come from.
James Bond: You may hex me. Let's see what it does for the cards.
Pat Fearing: Oh, those damned airplanes. They're enough to drive you mad.
James Bond: Mm...
Pat Fearing: Unless, of course, it's that mink glove of yours.
James Bond: I'll uh, shut out the noise.
Fiona: What a blow it must have been: You having a failure.
James Bond: Well, you can't win them all.
Miss Moneypenny: *You* are late!
James Bond: Yes. Some people on the roads really burn you up these days.
Emilio Largo: Perhaps *you'd* like to take the shoe - my friend won't mind - Mister...
James Bond: Bond.
Emilio Largo: Ah yes! Mr. Bond. One of my associates talk about you.
James Bond: Nothing bad, I hope.
Blofeld: James Bond. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Ernst Stavro Blofeld. They told me you were assassinated in Hong Kong.
James Bond: Yes, this is my second life.
Blofeld: You only live twice, Mr. Bond.
[Being bathed by Tanaka's women]
Tiger Tanaka: You know what it is about you that fascinates them, don't you? It's the hair on your chest. Japanese men all have beautiful bare skin.
James Bond: Japanese proverb say, "Bird never make nest in bare tree."
Helga Brandt: [Bond is captured by Helga Brandt] I've got you now.
James Bond: Well, enjoy yourself.
[Brandt slaps him]
[about to make love to Helga Brandt]
James Bond: Oh the things I do for England.
Tiger Tanaka: It can save your life, this cigarette.
James Bond: You sound like a commercial.
Blofeld: The firing power inside my crater is enough to annihilate a small army. You can watch it all on TV. It's the last program you're likely to see.
James Bond: Well, if I'm gonna be forced to watch television, may I smoke?
Blofeld: Yes. Give him his cigarettes. It won't be the nicotine that kills you, Mr. Bond.
[Bond has just sent Blofeld's henchman into the water. The piranhas immediately attack him]
James Bond: Bon appetit!
Tiger Tanaka: Permit me to introduce myself. I am Tanaka. Please call me Tiger.
James Bond: If you're Tanaka, then how do you feel about me?
Tiger Tanaka: [the code response] I... love you.
James Bond: Well, I'm glad we got that out of the way.
Tiger Tanaka: My friend, now you take your first civilized bath.
James Bond: Really?
[Bond is surrounded by four young Japanese women wearing only white bras and panties]
James Bond: Oh, I like the plumbing.
Tiger Tanaka: Place yourself entirely in their hands, my dear Bond-san. Rule number one: is never do anything yourself - when someone else can do it for you.
James Bond: And number two?
Tiger Tanaka: Rule number two: in Japan, men come first, women come second.
James Bond: I just might retire to here.
James Bond: Do you have any commandos here?
Tiger Tanaka: I have much, much better. Ninjas. Top-secret, Bond-san. This is my ninja training school.
[James is in bed with a Ling, a Chinese woman]
James Bond: Why do Chinese girls taste different from all other girls?
Ling: You think we better, huh?
James Bond: No, just different. Like Peking Duck is different from Russian Caviar. But I love them both.
Ling: Darling, I give you very best duck.
[Choosing a masseuse]
James Bond: Well, I'll just settle for this little old lady here.
Tiger Tanaka: Good choice, she's very sexyful.
Henderson: [Hands Bond a martini] Oh, that's stirred, not shaken. That was right, wasn't it?
James Bond: Perfect. Cheers.
James Bond: Russian vodka. Well done.
Henderson: Yeah, I get it from the doorman at the Russian embassy - amongst certain other things.
Mr. Osato: You should give up smoking. Cigarettes are very bad for your chest.
Helga Brandt: Mr. Osato believes in a healthy chest.
[Bond eyes Helga's breasts]
James Bond: Really?
Tiger Tanaka: You like Japanese sake, Mr. Bond? Or, would you prefer a vodka martini?
James Bond: Oh, no. I like sake. Especially when it's served at the correct temperature: 98.4 degrees fahrenheit like this is.
Tiger Tanaka: For a European, you are exceptionally cultivated.
James Bond: Is this the only room there is?
Kissy Suzuki: Yes. That is your bed,
[points to one side of room]
Kissy Suzuki: I shall sleep over there.
[points to other side of room]
James Bond: But we're supposed to be married.
Kissy Suzuki: Think again, please. You gave false name to priest.
James Bond: Yes, but we must keep up appearances. We're on our honeymoon.
Kissy Suzuki: No honeymoon. This is business.
James Bond: [pushing aside his oyster dinner] Well, I won't need these.
Aki: You wouldn't touch that horrible woman, would you?
James Bond: Oh heaven forbid.
[Coded message to headquarters]
James Bond: Little Nelly got a hot reception. Four big shots made improper advances toward her, but she defended her honor with great success.
[Bond is about to have his chest waxed so he can pass for Japanese]
James Bond: Why don't you just dye the parts that show?
Tiger Tanaka: [after Tiger's helicopter drops an enemy car chasing Bond and Aki into the Pacific ocean] How's that for Japanese efficiency?
James Bond: Just a drop in the ocean.
Tiger Tanaka: [discussing Osato Chemicals' supertanker, the Ning Po, which is known to be smuggling rocket fuel] We shadowed the Ning Po to the outer islands.
Aki: It was very dark. Hard to see her all the time.
Tiger Tanaka: But we know she stopped somewhere. Look at these photos.
[Tiger hands James photos of the Ning Po]
Aki: Look at the water line.
James Bond: [noticing the higher water line of the ship in seperate photos] You're right. Fully laden here, and empty here.
James Bond: [getting up] I want to take a look at the island now. Is Little Nellie here?
Tiger Tanaka: Yes. And her father.
[James, Aki, and Tiger enter a nearby garage where an agitated and sweating Q is waiting]
James Bond: [sarcastically] Welcome to Japan, Dad. Is my little girl hot and ready?
Q: [annoyed] Look, 007, I've had a long and tiring journey, probably to no purpose, so I'm in no mood for juvenile quips.
M: [buzzing intercom] Miss Moneypenny, give 007 the password we've agreed with Japanese S.I.S.
MoneyPenny: Yes sir.
MoneyPenny: We tried to think of something that you wouldn't forget.
James Bond: Yes?
MoneyPenny: "I, love, you". Repeat it please, to make sure you get it
James Bond: Don't worry, I get it.
James Bond: Uggghhh... Siamese vodka?
James Bond: Hello, Penny.
MoneyPenny: You better go right in. You're late, as usual - even from your own funeral.
James Bond: Well, we corpses have absolutely no sense of timing.
MoneyPenny: Oh, by the way, how was the girl?
James Bond: Which girl?
MoneyPenny: The Chinese one we fixed you up with.
James Bond: Oh, another five minutes, I'd have found out.
MoneyPenny: She'll never know what she missed.
James Bond: I'd like you to examine these as soon as possible. They're from Osato's safe.
Tiger Tanaka: This is an order for naval stores. 500 kilos of butter. 50 containers of lox. What is lox?
James Bond: Oh, it's American name for smoked salmon. But, it's also the technical name for liquid oxygen - which makes rocket fuel.
Tiger Tanaka: [Three young Japanese women giving Bond a bath] Your English girls would never perform this simple service.
James Bond: I think I know one or two who might get around to it.
Tiger Tanaka: Miss Moneypenny, perhaps?
James Bond: The last time someone gave me a massage, it was in Hong Kong. But, unfortunately, I had to cut it short. We were rudely interrupted by a couple of gunmen. So, we never got 'round to finishing it.
Helga Brandt: A Dom Perignon '59, Mr. Fisher? Are you really sure you won't change your mind?
James Bond: [Posing as Mr. Fisher] Well, if you insist.
Tiger Tanaka: Chasing girls will be the end of you, Bond-san. I have told you that before.
Aki: He didn't chase her! He did it so that I could get away. He wouldn't touch that horrible girl. You wouldn't, would you?
James Bond: Oh, heaven forbid.
Tiger Tanaka: I have my curiosity, Bond-san. What is little Nellie?
James Bond: Oh, she's a wonderful girl. Very small. Quite fast. Can do anything. Just your type.
Tiger Tanaka: A toy helicopter?
Q: No, it's certainly not a toy!
Q: [Showing Bond the improvements to little Nellie, his one-man, open-air, helicopter] Right. Now, pay attention. Two machine guns, fixed.
James Bond: Synchronized to what?
Q: A hundred yards when using incendiaries and high explosives. Two rocket launchers. Forward-firing on either side.
James Bond: Fine.
Q: Now, these fire heat-seeking air-to-air missiles - sixty a minute.
James Bond: Good.
Q: Flame guns. Two of them. Firing astern.
James Bond: What range?
Q: Eighty yards. Two smoke ejectors next door to them. Aerial mines. Now, remember, use them only when directly above target. That's about the lot, I think. You know the rest, don't you?
James Bond: Yes.
James Bond: Hello, Base One. There's nothing here but volcanoes.
James Bond: What's the plan for me?
Tiger Tanaka: First, you become a Japanese. Second, you train hard and quickly to become a ninja - like us. And third, to give you extra special cover - you take a wife.
James Bond: What are you going to do?
Le Chiffre: Physically, I'm not going to do anything.
James Bond: Ah, you're going to nothing me to death.
Le Chiffre: Torture of the mind. The most exquisite torture is all in the mind.
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