Jack Worthing Quotes in The Importance of Being Earnest (1952)

Lady Bracknell: Are your parents living?

Jack Worthing: I have lost both my parents.

Lady Bracknell: To lose one parent, Mr. Worthing, may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.

Lady Bracknell: Do you smoke?

Jack Worthing: Well yes, I must admit I smoke.

Lady Bracknell: I'm glad to hear it. A man should have an occupation of some kind.

Jack Worthing: Algy, you don't suppose that Gwendolyn will become like her mother - in about one hundred and fifty years, do you?

Algernon Moncrieff: All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his.

Jack Worthing: You are quite perfect Miss Fairfax.

Gwendolyn Fairfax: Oh I hope I am not that. It would leave no room for developments, and I intend to develop in many directions.

Jack Worthing: Gwendolen, it is a terrible thing for a man to find out suddenly that all his life he has been speaking nothing but the truth. Can you forgive me?

Jack Worthing: I am sick to death of cleverness. Everybody is clever nowadays. You can't go anywhere without meeting clever people. The thing has become an absolute public nuisance. I wish to goodness we still had a few fools left.

Algernon Moncreiff: We have.

Jack Worthing: I should extremely like to meet them. What do they talk about?

Algernon Moncreiff: The fools? Oh, about the clever people, of course.

Jack Worthing: What fools!

Lady Bracknell: I would strongly advise you, Mr. Worthing, to try and acquire some relations as soon as possible, and to make a definite effort to produce at any rate one parent, of either sex, before the season is quite over.

Jack Worthing: Well, I don't see how I could possibly manage to do that, Lady Bracknell. I can produce the hand-bag at any moment. It is in my dressing-room at home. I really think that should satisfy you, Lady Bracknell.

Lady Bracknell: Me, sir! What has it to do with me? You can hardly imagine that I and Lord Bracknell would dream of allowing our only daughter - a girl brought up with the utmost care - to marry into a cloak-room, and form an alliance with a parcel? Good morning, Mr. Worthing!