Jack Sparrow Quotes in Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)

Will Turner: Where's Elizabeth?

Jack Sparrow: She's safe, just like I promised. She's all set to marry Norrington, just like she promised. And you get to die for her, just like you promised. So we're all men of our word really... except for, of course, Elizabeth, who is in fact, a woman.

Will Turner: This is either madness... or brilliance.

Jack Sparrow: It's remarkable how often those two traits coincide.

Jack Sparrow: This is the day you will always remember as the day you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow!

Will Turner: You cheated.

Jack Sparrow: Pirate.

Jack Sparrow: Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid.

Norrington: No additional shot nor powder, a compass that doesn't point north,

[looks at Jack's sword]

Norrington: And I half expected it to be made of wood. You are without doubt the worst pirate I've ever heard of.

Jack Sparrow: But you have heard of me.

Mullroy: What's your purpose in Port Royal, Mr. Smith?

Murtogg: Yeah, and no lies.

Jack Sparrow: Well, then, I confess, it is my intention to commandeer one of these ships, pick up a crew in Tortuga, raid, pillage, plunder and otherwise pilfer my weasely black guts out.

Murtogg: I said no lies.

Mullroy: I think he's telling the truth.

Murtogg: If he were telling the truth, he wouldn't have told us.

Jack Sparrow: Unless, of course, he knew you wouldn't believe the truth even if he told it to you.

Will Turner: That's not true. I am not obsessed with treasure.

Jack Sparrow: Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate.

Jack Sparrow: Parleley, parlelellyleloooo, par le nee, partner, par... snip, parsley...

Ragetti: Parley?

Jack Sparrow: That's the one. Parley. Parley.

Pintel: Parley? Damn to the depths whatever man what thought of "Parley".

Jack Sparrow: That would be the French.

[last lines]

Jack Sparrow: Now... bring me that horizon.

[humming]

Jack Sparrow: "And really bad eggs." Drink up me 'earties. Yo ho.

[snaps compass shut]

Pintel: You're supposed to be dead!

Jack Sparrow: Am I not?

Jack Sparrow: [Wakes up and sees Elizabeth burning the rum] No! Not good! Stop! Not good! What are you doing? You burned all the food, the shade... the rum.

Elizabeth: Yes, the rum is gone.

Jack Sparrow: Why is the rum gone?

Elizabeth: One: because it is a vile drink that turns even the most respectable men into complete scoundrels. Two: that signal is over a thousand feet high. The entire Royal Navy is out looking for me. Do you really think there is even the slightest chance they won't see it?

Jack Sparrow: But why is the rum gone?

Elizabeth: Just wait captain Sparrow. You give it one hour, maybe two; keep a weather eye out and you will see white sails on that horizon.

[Jack momentarily considers shooting her with his single bullet he has been saving for ten years before stomping off]

Jack Sparrow: "Must have been terrible for you to be trapped here Jack. Must have been terrible for you." Well it bloody is now!

[Seeing Norrington's ship off shore, vindicating her plan]

Jack Sparrow: There'll be no living with her after this.

Jack Sparrow: The only rules that really matter are these: what a man can do and what a man can't do. For instance, you can accept that your father was a pirate and a good man or you can't. But pirate is in your blood, boy, so you'll have to square with that some day. And me, for example, I can let you drown, but I can't bring this ship into Tortuga all by me onesies, savvy? So, can you sail under the command of a pirate, or can you not?

Jack Sparrow: I know those cannons. It's the Pearl.

Man in Jail: The Black Pearl? I've heard stories. She's been preying on ships and settlements for near ten years. Never leaves any survivors.

Jack Sparrow: No survivors? Then where do the stories come from, I wonder?

Jack Sparrow: If you were waiting for the opportune moment, that was it.

Barbossa: How the blazes did you get off that island?

Jack Sparrow: When you marooned me on that god forsaken spit of land, you forgot one very important thing, mate: I'm Captain Jack Sparrow.

Jack Sparrow: [to Weatherby Swann] I think we've all arrived at a very special place. Spiritually, ecumenically, grammatically.

Jack Sparrow: I want you to know that I was rooting for you. Know that.

[to Commodore Norrington]

Jack Sparrow: Elizabeth... it would never have worked between us darling. I'm sorry... Will... nice hat. Friends... This is the day that you will ALWAYS remember as the day that you...

[backs up and trips over ledge]

Murtogg: This dock is off-limits to civilians.

Jack Sparrow: I'm terribly sorry, I didn't know. If I see one, I shall inform you immediately.

[Jack makes to continue but is blocked by Murtogg and Mullroy]

Jack Sparrow: Apparently there's some sort of high-toned and fancy to-do up at the fort, eh? How could it be that two upstanding gentlemen, such as yourselves, did not merit an invitation?

Murtogg: Someone's got to make sure that this dock stays off-limits to civilians.

Jack Sparrow: It's a fine goal, to be sure. But it seems to me... that a ship like that one, makes this one here seem a bit superfluous, really.

Murtogg: Oh, the Dauntless is the power in these waters, true enough. But there's no ship as can match the Interceptor for speed.

Jack Sparrow: I've heard of one, supposed to be very fast, nigh uncatchable: The Black Pearl.

Mullroy: Well, there's no real ship as can match the Interceptor.

Murtogg: The Black Pearl is a real ship.

Mullroy: No, it's not.

Murtogg: Yes it is, I've seen it.

Mullroy: You've seen it?

Murtogg: Yes.

Mullroy: You haven't seen it.

Murtogg: Yes, I have.

Mullroy: You've seen a ship with black sails that's crewed by the damned, and captained by a man so evil that Hell itself spat him back out?

Murtogg: No.

Mullroy: No.

Murtogg: But I have seen a ship with black sails.

[Jack quietly slips passed them unnoticed]

Mullroy: Oh, and no ship that's not crewed by the damned and captained by a man so evil that Hell itself spat him back out could possibly have black sails, therefore couldn't possibly be any other ship than the Black Pearl. Is that what you're telling me?

Murtogg: [nods] No.

Mullroy: Like I said, there's no real ship as can match the Interceptor.

Jack Sparrow: One question about your business, boy, or there's no use going: This girl... how far are you willing to go to save her?

Will Turner: I'd die for her.

Jack Sparrow: Oh good. No worries then.

Jack Sparrow: [looking at all the swords] Who makes all these?

Will Turner: I do. And I practice with them three hours a day.

Jack Sparrow: You need to find yourself a girl, mate. Or perhaps the reason you practice three hours a day is that you already found one, and are otherwise incapable of wooing said strumpet. You're not a eunuch are you?

Will Turner: I practice three hours a day, so when I meet a pirate, I can kill it.

Barbossa: [talking to Will Turner] Who are you?

Jack Sparrow: No one. He's no one. Distant cousin of my aunt's nephew twice removed. Lovely singing voice. Eunuch.

Jack Sparrow: I love this song. Really bad eggs. Ooh.

[falls]

Jack Sparrow: When I get the Pearl back, I'm gonna teach it to the whole crew, and we'll sing it all the time.

Elizabeth: And you'll be positively the most fearsome pirates in the Spanish Main.

Jack Sparrow: Not just the Spanish Main, love. The entire ocean. The entire wo'ld. Wherever we want to go, we'll go. That's what a ship is, you know. It's not just a keel and a hull and a deck and sails, that's what a ship needs but what a ship is... what the Black Pearl really is... is freedom.

Jack Sparrow: A wedding? I love weddings. Drinks all around!

[repeated line]

Jack Sparrow: Savvy?

[Jack throws a bucket of water on sleeping Gibbs]

Mr. Gibbs: Curse you for breathin' ya slack-jawed idiot. Mother's love. Jack. You should know better than to wake a man when he's sleepin'. Its bad luck.

Jack Sparrow: Fortunately, I know how to counter it; the man who did the waking buys the man who was sleeping a drink; the man who was sleeping drinks it while listening to a proposition from the man who did the waking.

Mr. Gibbs: Aye, that'll about do it.

[Will throws more water on Mr. Gibbs]

Mr. Gibbs: Blast! I'm already awake!

Will Turner: That was for the smell.

Jack Sparrow: [after Will draws his sword] Put it away, son. It's not worth you getting beat again.

Will Turner: You didn't beat me. You ignored the rules of engagement. In a fair fight, I'd kill you.

Jack Sparrow: That's not much incentive for me to fight fair, then, is it?

Jack Sparrow: Anamaria.

[Anamaria slaps Jack]

Will Turner: I suppose, you didn't deserve that one either?

Jack Sparrow: No, that one I deserved.

Anamaria: You stole my boat!

Jack Sparrow: Actually...

Anamaria: [Anamaria slaps Jack again]

Jack Sparrow: Borrowed... borrowed without permission, but with every intention of bringing it back.

Anamaria: But you didn't!

Jack Sparrow: You'll get another one.

Anamaria: I will.

Will Turner: A better one.

Jack Sparrow: A better one.

Will Turner: That one.

Jack Sparrow: What one?

Will Turner: [Will looks at the Interceptor]

Jack Sparrow: That one? Aye, that one. What say you to that?

The Crew: Aye!

Mr. Gibbs: No, it's frightful bad luck to have a woman aboard.

Jack Sparrow: It would be far worse not to have her.

Jack Sparrow: Last time... I was here a grand total of three days, all right? Last time, the rum runners used this island as a cache, they came past and I was able to barter passage off. By the look of things, they've long been out of business. Probably have your bloody friend Norrington to thank for that.

Elizabeth: So that's it, then? That's the secret, grand adventure of the infamous Jack Sparrow. You spent three days lying on a beach drinking rum.

Jack Sparrow: Welcome to the Caribbean, love.

Will Turner: She goes free.

[points pistol at Barbossa]

Barbossa: What's in your head, boy?

Will Turner: She goes free!

Barbossa: You've only got one shot, and we can't die.

Jack Sparrow: [whispered to Will] Don't do anything stupid.

Will Turner: You can't. I can.

[points gun at himself]

Jack Sparrow: Like that.

Barbossa: Who are you?

Jack Sparrow: [to Barbossa] No one. He's no one. A distant cousin of my aunt's nephew twice removed. Lovely singing voice, though - eunuch.

Will Turner: My name is Will Turner. My father was Bootstrap Bill Turner. His blood runs in my veins.

Ragetti: He's the spitting image of ol' Bootstrap Bill come back to haunt us.

Will Turner: On my word do as I say, or I'll pull this trigger and be lost to Davy Jones' Locker.

Barbossa: Name your terms, Mr. Turner.

Will Turner: Elizabeth goes free.

Barbossa: Yes, we know that one. Anything else?

Jack Sparrow: [points at himself] Me!

Will Turner: And the crew - the crew are not to be harmed.

[talking to the pirates while he's in jail]

Jack Sparrow: Worry about your own fortunes, gentlemen. The deepest circle of hell is reserved for betrayers and mutineers.

[pirate grabs Jack's throat to reveal a skeleton arm]

Jack Sparrow: So, there is a curse? That's interesting.

Koehler: You know nothing of hell.

Jack Sparrow: That's VERY interesting.

[Jack sees Mr. Cotton's parot]

Jack Sparrow: Well! I'm actually feeling rather good about this. I think we all arrived at a very special place eh?

[Governor acts disgusted]

Jack Sparrow: Spiritually. Ecumenically. Grammatically.

[Walks over to Commondore]

Jack Sparrow: I want you to know that I was rooting for you, mate. Know that.

[Turns to Elizabeth]

Jack Sparrow: Elizabeth. It would never have worked out between us, darling.

[Elizabeth looks confused]

Jack Sparrow: I'm sorry. Will. Nice hat.

[Will smiles]

Jack Sparrow: [Jack runs up to the edge of the balcony and turns to everybody] Friends! This is the day that you will always remember as the day that...

[Falls off balcony]

Barbossa: So what now, Jack Sparrow? Are we to be two immortals locked in an epic battle until Judgment Day and trumpets sound?

Jack Sparrow: Or you could surrender.

Jack Sparrow: Stop blowing holes in my ship!

Jack Sparrow: Move away.

Will Turner: No.

Jack Sparrow: Please move?

Will Turner: No. I cannot just step aside and let you escape.

Jack Sparrow: This shot was not meant for you.

[duelling with Jack, Barbossa suddenly throws away his sword]

Barbossa: You can't beat me, Jack!

[In reply, Jack stabs him with his sword. Barbossa simply sighs, pulls the blade out of his body and stabs Jack with it. He smiles as Jack totters - but is shocked when a shaft of moonlight turns Jack into a cursed skeleton of his former self... ]

Jack Sparrow: [examining his new form] That's interesting...

Jack Sparrow: [to Barbossa, an Aztec coin dancing on his fingers] I couldn't resist, mate...

[to Elizabeth]

Jack Sparrow: Where's the medallion?

Elizabeth: Wretch.

[attempts to slap him]

Jack Sparrow: [grabs her wrist] Ah, where is dear William?

Elizabeth: Will.

Will Turner: Elizabeth.

Jack Sparrow: Monkey!

Will Turner: We're going to steal a ship? That ship?

Jack Sparrow: Commandeer. We're going to commandeer that ship. Nautical term.

[the other prisoners are whistling and calling for the dog with the keys in his mouth]

Jack Sparrow: You can keep doing that forever, the dog is NEVER going to move.

Seedy Looking Prisoner: Well excuse me if we haven't resorted ourselves to the gallows just yet.

Jack Sparrow: Do us a favor... I know it's difficult for you... but please, stay here, and try not to do anything... stupid.

Jack Sparrow: Any man who falls behind, is left behind.

Will Turner: Barbossa, you lying bastard! You swore she'd go free!

Barbossa: Don't dare impugn me honor, boy! I agreed she go free, but it was you who failed to specify when or where. Though it does seem a shame to lose somethin' so fine, don't it, lads?

The Crew: Aye.

Barbossa: So I'll be havin' that dress back before ye go.

Jack Sparrow: I always liked you.

Bo'sun: Grr...

Elizabeth: Goes with your black heart.

Barbossa: Ooh, it's still warm.

The Crew: Off you go! Come on! Get on with it!

Bo'sun: Too long!

Jack Sparrow: I really rather hoped we were past all this.

Barbossa: Jack... Jack! Did you not notice? That be the same island we made you the governor of on our last little trip.

Jack Sparrow: I did notice.

Barbossa: Perhaps you'll conjure up another miraculous escape, but I doubt it. Off you go.

Jack Sparrow: The last time you left me a pistol with one shot.

Barbossa: By the powers, you're right. Where be Jack's pistol? Bring it forward.

Jack Sparrow: Seeing as there's two of us, a gentleman would give us a pair of pistols.

Barbossa: It'll be one pistol as before, and you can be the gentleman and shoot the lady; and starve to death yourself.

Harbormaster: Hold up there, you. It's a shilling to tie up your boat at the dock... and I shall need to know your name.

Jack Sparrow: What do you say to three shillings and we forget the name.

Harbormaster: Welcome to Port Royal, Mr. Smith.

Mullroy: Hey, you. Get away from there. You don't have permission to be aboard there, mate.

Jack Sparrow: I'm sorry. It's just... it's such a pretty boat... ship.

Mullroy: Not breathing.

Jack Sparrow: Move.

[Jack slits the ties on Elizabeth's corset and rips it off, causing Elizabeth to regain consciousness, and spit out a lot of water]

Mullroy: Never would have though of that.

Jack Sparrow: Clearly you've never been to Singapore.

Barbossa: Why thank ye, Jack.

Jack Sparrow: You're welcome.

Barbossa: Oh, not you. We named the monkey Jack.

Will Turner: She goes free.

Barbossa: What's in your head, boy?

Will Turner: She goes free.

Barbossa: You've only got one shot and we can't die.

Jack Sparrow: Don't do anything stupid.

Will Turner: You can't.

[points gun at his own throat]

Will Turner: I can.

Jack Sparrow: Like that.

Jack Sparrow: You know, for having such a bleak outlook on pirates you are well on your way to becoming one: sprung a man from jail, commandeered a ship of the fleet, sailed with a buccaneer crew out of Tortuga, and you're completely obsessed with treasure.

Jack Sparrow: [upon seeing Elizabeth plunge into the ocean] Will you be saving her then?

Mullroy: I can't swim.

[Jack looks at Murtogg... no he won't do either]

Jack Sparrow: Pride of the King's navy you are. Do not lose these.

[toasting to their new partnership]

Jack Sparrow: Take what ye can!

Mr. Gibbs: Give nothin' back!

[after inspecting the crew]

Jack Sparrow: Satisfied?

Will Turner: Well you proved they're mad.

Governor Swann: Hang him.

Norrington: Keep your guns on him, men. Gillette, fetch some irons.

[Pulls up Jack's sleeve]

Norrington: Well, well, well Jack Sparrow, isn't it?

Jack Sparrow: Captain Jack Sparrow, if you please sir.

Norrington: I don't see your ship, Captain.

Jack Sparrow: I'm in the market, as it were.

[the other pirates come upon Jack Sparrow in the cave]

Pintel: You? You're supposed to be dead.

Jack Sparrow: [Looks himself up and down] Am I not?

Jack Sparrow: That's the second time I've had to watch that man sail away with my ship.

Elizabeth: But you were marooned on this island before, weren't you? So we can escape in the same way you did then.

Jack Sparrow: To what point and purpose, young missy? The Black Pearl is gone and unless you have a rudder and a lot of sails hidden in that bodice - unlikely - young Mr. Turner will be dead long before you can reach him.

Elizabeth: But you're Captain Jack Sparrow. You vanished from under the eyes of seven agents of the East India Company. You sacked Nassau Port without even firing a shot. Are you the pirate I've read about or not? How did you escape last time?

[protesting Jack's arrest]

Elizabeth: Commodore, I really must protest. Pirate or not, this man saved my life.

Norrington: One good deed is not enough to redeem a man of a lifetime of wickedness.

Jack Sparrow: Though it seems enough to condemn him.

Norrington: Indeed.

Jack Sparrow: You seem somewhat familiar. Have I threatened you before?

Will Turner: I make a point of avoiding familiarity with pirates.

Jack Sparrow: I thought you were supposed to keep to the code.

Mr. Gibbs: We figured they were more actual guidelines.

Town Clerk: Jack Sparrow.

Jack Sparrow: Captain... Captain Jack Sparrow.

Town Clerk: ...for your willful commission of crime against the crown. Those crimes being numerous in quantity and sinister in nature...

Elizabeth: This is wrong...

Governor Swann: Commodore Norrington is bound by the law, as are we all.

Town Clerk: ...impersonating an officer of the Royal Navy; impersonating a clergy of the Church of England...

Jack Sparrow: Oh yeah, heh heh

Town Clerk: ...arson; kidnapping; perjury; piracy; pilfering; deprivation of a Federal Loyalist. For these crimes you will be hung by the neck until dead. May God have mercy on your soul.

Jack Sparrow: [to Will Turner] Now as long as you're just hanging there, pay attention.

Barbossa: I want 50 per cent of ye plunder.

Jack Sparrow: 15.

Barbossa: 40.

Jack Sparrow: 25.

Barbossa: [considering]

Jack Sparrow: And I'll buy you the hat. A really BIG one... Commodore.

[Barbossa leans in to slit Will's throat]

Jack Sparrow: You don't want to be doing that, mate.

Barbossa: No, I really think I do.

Jack Sparrow: Your funeral.

Elizabeth: You didn't tell them about the curse.

Jack Sparrow: I noticed neither did you. For the same reason, I expect.

Elizabeth: He wouldn't have risked it.

Jack Sparrow: Could have gotten him drunk. Oh, don't get me wrong, love. I admire a person who's willing to do whatever's necessary.

Elizabeth: You're a smart man, Jack. But I don't entirely trust you.

Jack Sparrow: Peas in a pod, darling.

Mr. Gibbs: Then, on the fourth day, he roped himself a couple of sea turtles, lashed 'em together and made a raft.

Will Turner: He roped a couple of sea turtles.

Mr. Gibbs: Aye. Sea turtles.

Will Turner: What did he use for rope?

Jack Sparrow: [from beside them] Human hair.

[pause]

Jack Sparrow: From my back.

[the Black Pearl is gone]

Elizabeth: I'm sorry, Jack.

Jack Sparrow: [wistfully proud] They done what's right by them. Can't expect more than that.

Barbossa: So you expect to leave me standing on some beach with nothing but a name and your word it's the one I need and watch you sail away on my ship?

Jack Sparrow: No. I expect to leave you standing on some beach with absolutely no name at all, watching me sail away on *my* ship, and then I'll shout the name back to you. Savvy?

Barbossa: But that still leaves us with the problem of me standing on some beach with naught but a name and your word it's the one I need.

Jack Sparrow: Of the two of us, I am the only one who hasn't committed mutiny, therefore my word is the one we'll be trusting. Although, I suppose I should be thanking you because in fact, if you hadn't betrayed me and left me to die, I would have an equal share in that curse same as you.

[bites into an apple]

Jack Sparrow: Funny ol' world, i'n'it?

[offers him an apple]

[as they are attempting to commandeer the Interceptor]

Jack Sparrow: Don't be alarmed, we're taking over the ship.

Will Turner: [lunges with his sword] AYE! AVAST!

[Jack stares at him as all the British sailors burst out laughing]

Elizabeth: You're despicable.

Jack Sparrow: Sticks and stones, love. I saved your life, you saved mine. We're square.

Norrington: Mr. Sparrow, you will accompany these fine men to the helm and provide us with the bearing to Isla de Muerta. You will then spend the remainder of the voyage contemplating all possible meanings of the phrase "silent as the grave". Do I make myself clear?

Jack Sparrow: Inescapably.

[after breaking Jack out of jail]

Will Turner: Hurry, someone would have heard that.

Jack Sparrow: Not without my effects.

Will Turner: I can get you out of here

Jack Sparrow: How's that... the key's run off.

Jack Sparrow: ...and then they made me their chief.

Barbossa: It's not possible!

Jack Sparrow: Not *probable*.

Jack Sparrow: You, sailor.

Mr. Gibbs: Cotton, sir.

Jack Sparrow: Mr. Cotton. Do you have the courage and fortitude to follow orders and stay true in the face of danger and almost certain death?

[pause]

Jack Sparrow: Mr. Cotton. Answer, man.

Mr. Gibbs: He's a mute, sir. Poor devil had his tongue cut out, so he trained the parrot to talk for him. No one's yet figured how.

Jack Sparrow: Mr. Cotton's... parrot. Same question.

Parrot: [squawk] Wind in the sails. Wind in the sails.

Mr. Gibbs: Mostly, we figure, that means 'yes.'

Jack Sparrow: Scarlet.

[She slaps him]

Jack Sparrow: I'm not sure I deserved that.

[a blond woman approaches]

Jack Sparrow: Giselle.

Giselle: Who was she?

Jack Sparrow: What?

[She slaps him]

Jack Sparrow: I may have deserved that.

Jack Sparrow: What's your name?

Will Turner: Will Turner.

Jack Sparrow: That would be short for William, I imagine. Good strong name, no doubt named for your father, eh?

Will Turner: Yes.

Jack Sparrow: Well Mr. Turner, I've changed me mind. If you spring me from this cell, I swear on pain of death, I shall take you to the Black Pearl and your bonnie lass. Do we have an accord?

[puts out his hand]

Will Turner: Agreed.

[they shake hands]

Jack Sparrow: Now, get me out of here!

[Will grabs chair and uses it to lift up the cell door and it crashes to floor]

Will Turner: Quick! Some would've heard that.

Jack Sparrow: Not without my effects.

Elizabeth: [sighs] "... Drink up me hearties, yo ho".

Jack Sparrow: What was that, Elizabeth?

Elizabeth: It's Miss Swann.

Jack Sparrow: Miss Swann.

Elizabeth: Nothing, it's just a song I learned as a child when I thought it would be fun to meet a real pirate.

Jack Sparrow: Let's hear it, then.

Elizabeth: No.

Jack Sparrow: Come on. We've got the time. Let's be having it.

Elizabeth: No. I'd need a lot more to drink.

Jack Sparrow: How much more?

Jack Sparrow: Is there a problem between us, Miss Swann?

Elizabeth: You were going to tell Barbossa about Will in exchange for a ship.

Jack Sparrow: We could use a ship. But the truth is, I wasn't going to tell Barbossa about Will, as long as I had something to bargain with, which now nobody has, thanks to bloody stupid Will.

Elizabeth: Oh.

Jack Sparrow: [mockingly] Oh.

Barbossa: I suppose in exchange, you want me not to kill the whelp.

Jack Sparrow: No, no, no. Not at all. By all means, kill the whelp.

Norrington: One good deed is not enough to redeem a man of a lifetime of wickedness.

Jack Sparrow: But it seems enough to condemn him.

Jack Sparrow: You think this wise, boy... crossing blades with a pirate?

Will Turner: You threatened Miss Swann.

Jack Sparrow: Only a little.

Jack Sparrow: Come on you filthy, slimy, mangy cur,

[dog slinks away]

Jack Sparrow: no no no no no no no I didn't mean, I didn...

Mr. Gibbs: The kid's a bit of a stick, isn't he?

Jack Sparrow: You have no idea.

Mr. Gibbs: We should drop canvas, sir.

Jack Sparrow: She can hold a bit longer.

Mr. Gibbs: What's in your head, Captain, that puts you in such a fine mood?

Jack Sparrow: We're catching up.

Barbossa: And I suppose in exchange you want me not to kill the whelp?

Jack Sparrow: No, no, no, by all means kill the whelp. Just not yet. Wait for the opportune moment.

Lt. Gillette: This ship cannot be crewed by two men. You'll never make it out of the bay.

Jack Sparrow: Son, I'm Captain Jack Sparrow. Savvy?

Jack Sparrow: Ta Da Da Dam, Da Da Da Dam.

Barbossa: [after Jack show up alive after leaving him on the island a second time] Its not possible

Jack Sparrow: Not Probable

Will Turner: Jack. Where's Elizabeth?

Jack Sparrow: She's safe, just like I promised. She's all set to marry Norrington, just like she promised. And you get to die for it just like you promised.

Jack Sparrow: [pauses and thinks] So we are all men of our word really. Except for Elizabeth who is in fact a woman.

[At gunpoint, Jack Sparrow forces Elizabeth Swann to reattach his sword and compass to his belt. She pulls the belt tight]

Jack Sparrow: Easy on the goods, darling.

Jack Sparrow: Apparently, there's a leak...

Jack Sparrow: [Will and Jack have just taken over the Interceptor after Norrington's men go onto the Dauntless] Thank you, Commodore, for getting us ready to make sail! We would have had a hard time of it by ourselves!

[the Black Pearl is firing at Port Royal]

Jack Sparrow: I know those canons. It's the Pearl.

Barbossa: Gents, you all remember Captain Jack Sparrow. Kill him.

Jack Sparrow: The girl's blood didn't work, did it?

Barbossa: [to the crew] Hold your fire!

Barbossa: You know whose blood we need.

Jack Sparrow: I know whose blood you need!

Will Turner: Jack!

Barbossa: It's not possible.

Jack Sparrow: Not Probable.

Jack Sparrow: You know the feeling you get when standing in a high place, the sudden urge to jump...

[looks over the cliff, as if considering jumping, then comes back to reality]

Jack Sparrow: I don't have it.

Angelica: [Jack turns to leave] Wait! I am with child... yours.

Jack Sparrow: I don't recall that we ever had...

Angelica: You were drunk.

Jack Sparrow: I've actually never been that drunk.

[last lines]

Gibbs: I don't get it, Jack. You had the chalices, the tear, the water - you could have lived forever!

Jack Sparrow: Who's to say I won't live forever, eh? Discoverer of the Fountain of Youth. I've no say in it, Gibbs. It's a pirate's life for me.

[winks]

Jack Sparrow: Savvy?

Jack Sparrow: Did everyone see that? Because I will *not* be doing it again.

Salaman: You're either with us or against us!

Philip: I'm not with you, neither am I against you!

Salaman: [to Jack] Can he do that?

Jack Sparrow: He's religious, I believe it's required.

Jack Sparrow: How can you say I used you?

Angelica: You know exactly how!

Jack Sparrow: I know, but how can you say it?

[after being addressed as "Jack Sparrow"]

Jack Sparrow: There should be a "Captain" in there somewhere.

Captain Teague: I heard where you're headed. The Fountain.

Jack Sparrow: Have you been there?

Captain Teague: Does this face looks like it's been to the Fountain of Youth?

Jack Sparrow: ...Depends on the light.

Jack Sparrow: [after the mutiny is victorious] The ship is ours!

Blackbeard: [comes out of his quarters and glares at Sparrow] Gentlemen. I be placed in a bewilderment. There I were, resting. And upon a sudden, I hear an ungodly row on deck. Sailors abandoning their posts, without orders, without leave. Men before the mast, taking the ship for themselves. What be that, First Mate?

Angelica: Mutiny, Captain.

Blackbeard: [holding his hand to his ear] Again?

Angelica: Mutiny!

Blackbeard: Aye, mutiny. And what fate befall mutineers? Now, we know the answer to that, do we not? Mutineers... HANG!

[raises his enchanted sword, making the sails drop, and the rigging ensnare all the mutineers]

Jack Sparrow: [hangs upside down in front of Blackbeard] Captain, I wish to report a mutiny. I can name fingers and point names.

Blackbeard: Perfect.

Jack Sparrow: You lied to me by telling me the truth?

Angelica: Yes.

Jack Sparrow: That's very good, may I use that?

Jack Sparrow: I may have had... briefly, mind you... stirrings.

Gibbs: Stirrings?

Jack Sparrow: Stirrings.

Gibbs: What, like feelings, you mean?

Jack Sparrow: No, no, no, no, not quite all the way to feelings. More like... All right feelings, damn you.

Angelica: Admit it, Jack. You still love me.

Jack Sparrow: If you had a sister and a dog... I'd choose the dog.

[Barbossa fiddles with his pegleg and and removes it]

Jack Sparrow: Oh! A knife?

Barbossa: Better!

[Reveals his pegleg is a flask and takes a drink]

Jack Sparrow: I want one of those.

Angelica: What were you doing in a Spanish convent, anyway?

Jack Sparrow: Mistook it for a brothel. Honest mistake.

Gibbs: So the Pearl. Any idea on how to get her out?

Jack Sparrow: We shall need a crossbow, an hourglass, three goats, one of us must learn to play the trumpet, whilst the other one goes like this.

Gibbs: I know a man with a goat.

Jack Sparrow: Good. I can go like this.

Jack Sparrow: You walk like a girl.

Angelica: You would know.

Jack Sparrow: Clergyman, on the off chance that this does not go well for me, I would like it noted here and now that I am fully prepared to believe in whatever I must, so that I may be welcomed into that place where all the "goody-goodies" get to go. Savvy?

Jack Sparrow: The crime in which you have been found guilty of, is being innocent of being Jack Sparrow.

Angelica: That's hardly appropriate for the first mate.

Jack Sparrow: Was I the first?

Jack Sparrow: Why is the Black Pearl in the bottle?

Angelica: I love you.

Jack Sparrow: As do I. Always have, always will.

Blackbeard: Aha. Dead end. Dead. End. Dead end!

Angelica: Jack, I'm starting to think you don't know where you're going.

Jack Sparrow: It's not the destination so much as the journey, they say.

Jack Sparrow: Better to not know which moment may be your last. Every morsel of your entire being alive to the infinite mystery of it all.

Angelica: Maybe you don't believe in the supernatural.

Jack Sparrow: Oh no, no, I've seen a thing or two.

Lord John Carteret: [sarcastically] You *are* Jack Sparrow?

Jack Sparrow: There should be a "Captain" in there somewhere.

[he grimaces]

King George: I've heard of you... and you know who *I* am.

Jack Sparrow: Face is familiar. Have I... threatened you before?

Jack Sparrow: Blackbeard. Edward Teach. The pirate all pirates fear. Resurrector of the dead in his spare time.

Angelica: I love you.

[leans in to Kiss]

Jack Sparrow: [just about to kiss] I gotta go.

[leaves]

[Jack sneaks up to Angelica sleeping and slowly gets in bed next to her]

Angelica: [half asleep] Jack, if this is a dream you can keep the sword and boots on... If it's not...

Jack Sparrow: It's a dream.

Gibbs: All part of the plan, yes?

Jack Sparrow: No.

Blackbeard: [points the gun at Jack's head] I need those chalices.

Jack Sparrow: Shoot. Save me the bother of the fall.

Blackbeard: You will go. You will return. Or I will kill her.

[points the gun at Angelica]

Jack Sparrow: [surprised] You won't kill your own daughter!

Blackbeard: [hands the gun to the zombie quartermaster] Quartermaster, get me six more pistols, remove the shot from all but two, but do not tell me which two.

[walks to where the six pistols are at]

Blackbeard: You get to choose, Mr.Sparrow.

[in agreement with Philip's comment]

Jack Sparrow: I support the missionary's position.

Jack Sparrow: Death lies before us, as we sail to the Fountain of Youth.

Angelica: [being marooned] And how will I get free of these bonds?

Jack Sparrow: You broke free of your bonds thirty minutes ago, waiting for the precise moment to pounce.

[blocks Angelica's attack]

Jack Sparrow: There'll be dangers along the way... firstly mermaids, zombies... Blackbeard.

Jack Sparrow: You're the one who insisted on bringing the bloody mermaid!

Angelica: The lies I told you were not lies

Jack Sparrow: *Pause* You lied to me by telling the truth?

Angelica: Yes

Jack Sparrow: That's very good. May I use that?

Jack Sparrow: [to Angelica] I thought I should give you fair warning, we're taking the ship. Nothing personal.

Angelica: You were the only pirate I thought I could pass for.

Jack Sparrow: That is NOT a compliment.

Jack Sparrow: He bought that?

Angelica: I sold that.

Barbossa: Don't touch the map.

Jack Sparrow: Oh.

Angelica: [after realizing Jack tricked Blackbeard into drinking the wrong chalice] You bastard, how could you?

Jack Sparrow: Your father saved you. Perhaps his soul is now redeemed.

Jack Sparrow: So, what is the ritual?

Angelica: Two silver chalices, the teardrop of a mermaid, and water from the fountain. One chalice will contain the tear, the other will not. Whoever dinks from the chalice with the tear will have their life extended, from the person who drinks from the other chalice...

Jack Sparrow: I don't really agree to that...

Captain Teague: Hello Jackie.

Jack Sparrow: 'Ello dad.

[Jack has just jump down into the river]

Jack Sparrow: Wet... wet again.

Jack Sparrow: You demonstrated a lot of technique for someone I supposedly corrupted.

Jack Sparrow: [to Angelica about taking the ship] I think you might be better off if you just...

[sword comes through the door]

Jack Sparrow: ...stay out of it.

Barbossa: [at St. James Palace in London] Jack, our sands be all but run. Where's the harm in joining the winning sides?

Jack Sparrow: I understand everything... except that wig.

[to Blackbeard and Angelica, holding the prepared concoction]

Jack Sparrow: I cannot save you both. One of you must sacrifice.

Jack Sparrow: [to Angelica, who has been posing as Jack] You've stolen me. And I'm here to take meself back.

Jack Sparrow: What has become of my Pearl?

Barbossa: I lost the Pearl the same attack I lost my leg.

[an enraged Jack has to be restrained by guards]

Jack Sparrow: If that ship be sunk properly, then its Captain should be sunk with it!

Jack Sparrow: The fountain of youth, what does it require?

Angelica: A mermaid, Jack.

Jack Sparrow: Seeing as how you're still alive, I say it's all been very successful thus far.

Jack Sparrow: Doesn't ring a bell.

Jack Sparrow: You are aware of the ritual?

Angelica: Yes, I am.

Jack Sparrow: What is it?

Jack Sparrow: Have I mentioned, sir, what a lovely daughter you have?

Jack Sparrow: Mutiny served me well. It gained me an audience with you.

Jack Sparrow: Sweetness!

Angelica: I tried to kill you in St. Dominique.

Jack Sparrow: Either or.

Jack Sparrow: He's even more annoying in miniature.

Jack Sparrow: Gibbs, I was just on me way to break you out of jail. You stole my map.

Jack Sparrow: There is a girl. A female. Of the opposite sex.

Gibbs: When is there not?

Jack Sparrow: [to Blackbeard] Captain, I wish to report a mutiny. I can name fingers and point names.

Prime Minister Henry Pelham: You are in the presence of George Augustus, Duke of Brunswick-Luneburg, Archtreasurer and Prince-elector of the Holy Roman Empire, King of Great Britain and Ireland... and of you.

Jack Sparrow: [thinking pause] Doesn't ring a bell.

[Barbossa is giving orders and Jack repeats the order]

Barbossa: What are you doin'?

Jack Sparrow: What are *you* doin'?

Barbossa: No, what *are* you doin'?

Jack Sparrow: What are *you* doin'?

Barbossa: *No!* What *are* you doin'?

Jack Sparrow: What are *you* doin'? Captain gives orders on the ship.

Barbossa: The captain of the ship *is* givin' orders.

Jack Sparrow: My ship, makes me captain.

Barbossa: They be my charts!

Jack Sparrow: Well, that makes you

[pause]

Jack Sparrow: chartman.

Pintel: Stow it! Both of you! That's an order! Understand?

[Jack and Barbossa stare at him]

Pintel: Sorry. I just thought with the Captain issue in doubt, I'd throw my name in for consideration, sorry.

Ragetti: [to Pintel] I'd vote for you.

Captain Ammand: [about Barbossa] Shoot him!

Captain Jocard: Cut out his tongue!

Jack Sparrow: Shoot him and cut out his tongue, then shoot his tongue! And trim that scraggly beard!

Barbossa: [Jack and Barbossa see the dead Kraken] Still thinkin' of running, Jack? Think you can outrun the world? You know the problem with being the last of anything, by and by there be none left at all.

Jack Sparrow: Sometimes things come back mate. We're livin' proof, you and me.

Barbossa: Aye, but that's a gamble of long odds, ain't it? There's never a guarantee of comin' back. But passin' on, that's dead certain.

Jack Sparrow: Summoning the brethren court then, is it?

Barbossa: It's our only hope, lad.

Jack Sparrow: That's a sad commentary in and of itself.

Barbossa: The world used to be a bigger place.

Jack Sparrow: World's still the same. There's just less in it.

Lord Cutler Beckett: [Jack is about to light a cannon that's pointed at the mast] You're mad.

Jack Sparrow: Thank goodness for that, 'cause if I wasn't this would probably never work.

[fires the cannon, which catapults him onto his ship, landing safely on his feet behind his crew]

Jack Sparrow: And that was without even a single drop of rum.

[last lines]

Jack Sparrow: Drink up, me hearties, yo ho!

Jack Sparrow: What? You've seen it all, done it all. Survived. That's the trick isn't it? To survive?

Captain Teague: It's not just about living forever, Jackie. The trick is still living with yourself forever.

Barbossa: There's not been a gatherin' like this in our lifetime.

Jack Sparrow: And I owe them all money...

Jack Sparrow: He needs the Pearl. Captain Turner needs the Pearl,

Jack Sparrow: [to Elizabeth] and you felt guilty,

Jack Sparrow: [to Barbossa] and you and your Brethren Court.

Jack Sparrow: Did no one come to save me just because they missed me?

[Everyone looks around. Pintel, Ragetti, and Jack the Monkey cautiously raise their hands]

Jack Sparrow: I'm standing over there with them.

Gibbs: Jack! The world needs you back something fierce!

Will Turner: Cutler Beckett has the heart of Davy Jones, he controls the Flying Dutchman.

Elizabeth Swann: He's taking over the sea!

Tia Dalma: The song has already been sung! The brethren court is called!

Jack Sparrow: I leave you people alone for just a minute and look what happens, everything's gone to pot!

Jack Sparrow: Why should I sail with any of you? Four of you have tried to kill me in the past... one of you succeeded.

[looks at Elizabeth; Will looks at her; she looks around, guiltily]

Jack Sparrow: Oh, she's not told you. You'll have loads to talk about while you're here.

Jack Sparrow: [to Tia Dalma] As for you...

Tia Dalma: Now, don't tell me you didn't enjoy it at the time.

Jack Sparrow: Fair enough. You're in.

[begins going down the line of pirates on the beach]

Jack Sparrow: [to Ragetti] Don't need you, you scare me. Gibbs, you can come. Marty, Cotton... Cotton's parrot, I'm a little iffy... At least I'll have someone to talk to.

[to Tai Huang]

Jack Sparrow: Who are you?

Tai Huang: Tai Huang. These are my men.

Jack Sparrow: Where does your allegiance lie?

Tai Huang: With the highest bidder.

Jack Sparrow: I have a ship.

Tai Huang: That makes you the highest bidder.

Jack Sparrow: Good man. Weigh anchor, all hands! Prepare to make sail!

[takes out compass]

Cotton's Parrot: Weigh anchor!

Barbossa: [pats the charts in his hands] Jack... Which way ya goin', Jack?

Jack Sparrow: I have no sympathy for any of you feculent maggots and no more patience to pretend otherwise. Gentlemen, I wash my hands of this weirdness.

Jack Sparrow: You know, for all that pirates are clever-called, we are an unimaginative lot when it comes to naming things.

Gibbs: [nods] Aye.

Jack Sparrow: I once sailed with a geezer lost both his arms and part of his eye.

Gibbs: What did you call him?

Jack Sparrow: [pause] Larry.

Jack Sparrow: Now we're being followed by rocks. Never had that one before.

Jack Sparrow: Cuttlefish. Eh? Let us not, dear friends, forget our dear friends the cuttlefish... flipping glorious little sausages. Pen them up together, and they will devour each other without a second thought... Human nature, in'it? Ooor... fish nature... So yes... we could hold up here, well-provisioned and well-armed, and half of us would be dead within the month! Which seems grim to me any way you slice it! Or... ahh... as my learned colleague so naively suggests, we can release Calypso, and we can pray that she will be merciful... I rather doubt it. Can we, in fact, pretend that she is anything other than a woman scorned, like which fury Hell hath no? We cannot. Res ipsa loquitur, tabula in naufragio, we are left with but one option. I agree with, and I cannot believe the words are coming out of me mouth... Captain Swann. We must fight.

Will Turner: I'm losing her, Jack. Every step I make for my father is a step away from Elizabeth.

Jack Sparrow: Mate, if you choose to lock your heart away you'll lose it for certain.

Captain Jocard: Who is this traitor?

Barbossa: Not likely one among us.

Elizabeth Swann: Where's Will?

Jack Sparrow: Not among us.

Jack Sparrow: Done?

Lord Cutler Beckett: Done. Although if I kill you, then I can use the compass to find my way to Shipwreck Cove.

[raises his gun]

Lord Cutler Beckett: Cut out the middle man, as it were.

Jack Sparrow: Without me, you'd arrive at the Cove and find it a fortress, nigh-impregnable, able to withstand a blockade for years. Then you'll be wishing "Oh, if only there was someone I hadn't killed inside, to make sure the pirates come OUTside..."

Lord Cutler Beckett: And you can do this?

Jack Sparrow: You may kill me, but you can never insult me. Who am I?

[Beckett falters, confused]

Jack Sparrow: [put out] I'm Captain Jack Sparrow!

Captain Chevalle: There has not been a king since the first brethren court, and that is not likely to change!

Captain Teague: Not likely.

Elizabeth Swann: Why not?

Gibbs: Because the pirate king is elected by popular vote...

Barbossa: ...and each pirate only votes for himself

Jack Sparrow: I call for a vote.

[Barbossa rolls his eyes as Captain Teague starts playing the guitar]

Captain Ammand: I vote for Ammand, the Corsair!

Captain Chevalle: Captain Chevalle, the penniless Frenchman!

Mistress Ching: Mistress Ching!

Captain Jocard: Gentleman Jocard.

Elizabeth Swann: Elizabeth Swann.

Barbossa: Barbossa.

Captain Vallenueva: Villanueva!

[Captain Teague stops playing his guitar]

Jack Sparrow: Elizabeth Swann.

[the court begins to yell]

Elizabeth Swann: What?

Jack Sparrow: I know. Curious, isn't it?

Gibbs: Your carriage waits, my lady! The oars are inside.

[Elizabeth bids her pirate friends farewell]

Ragetti: 'Bye, poppet.

Barbossa: MRS. Turner...

Elizabeth Swann: Jack... it would never have worked between us.

Jack Sparrow: Keep telling yourself that, darling.

[Elizabeth steps forward to kiss Jack]

Jack Sparrow: Once was quite enough!

Elizabeth Swann: Thank you.

Jack Sparrow: [examining the map] Up is down. That's just maddeningly unhelpful. Why are these things never clear?

Miniature Jack 1: [voice] Clear as mud, Jackie...

Jack Sparrow: What? Eh?

Miniature Jack 1: [appearing from Jack's left dreadlocks] Stab the heart.

Miniature Jack 2: [appearing from Jack's right dreadlocks] Don't stab the heart.

Jack Sparrow: Come again?

Miniature Jack 2: The Dutchman must have a captain...

Jack Sparrow: Well that's even more than less than unhelpful.

Miniature Jack 1: Sail the seas for eternity.

Jack Sparrow: [smiling] I love the sea...

Miniature Jack 2: What about port?

Jack Sparrow: I prefer rum... Rum's good.

Miniature Jack 2: Making port, where we can get rum and sultry wenches... once every ten years.

Miniature Jack 1: What'd he say?

Jack Sparrow: Once every ten years.

Miniature Jack 1: Ten years is a long time, mate.

Jack Sparrow: Even longer, given the deficit of rum.

Miniature Jack 1: ...But eternity is longer still.

Miniature Jack 2: And how'll you be spending it? Dead?

Miniature Jack 1: ...Or not... The Immortal Captain Jack Sparrow.

Jack Sparrow: Ooh, I like that.

Miniature Jack 2: [looking out to the sea] Come sunset and it won't matter.

Jack Sparrow: [realizing] ... Not sunset... Sundown! And Rise... Up!

Jack Sparrow: We must fight... to run away!

Jack Sparrow: Send this pestilent, traitorous, cow-hearted, yeasty codpiece to the brig.

[Jack is about to eat a peanut when a shot is heard. He falls to the ground to reveal ANOTHER Jack Sparrow]

Jack Sparrow: [picking up the peanut] MY peanut!

Davy Jones: [upon seeing Elizabeth on the ship] Harridan! You'll see no mercy from me!

Elizabeth Swann: That's why I brought this.

[drawing her sword to fight]

Davy Jones: [Will stabs Davy Jones with a sword from behind] Missed! Did you forget, I'm a heartless wretch!

Davy Jones: [seeing Will looking at Elizabeth] Ah, love; a dreadful bond, and yet, so easily severed. Tell me, William Turner: do you fear death?

Jack Sparrow: Do you?

Davy Jones: [Turns to see Jack holding the heart]

Jack Sparrow: Heady tonic, holding life and death in the palm of one's hand.

Davy Jones: [sneering] You've a cruel mind, Jack Sparrow.

Jack Sparrow: Cruel is a matter of perspective.

Jack Sparrow: [as the real Jack escapes the brig] I miss him already

Jack Sparrow: He was quite charming, wasn't he?

Jack Sparrow: NOBODY MOVE! I've dropped me brain.

Davy Jones: Do you fear death?

Jack Sparrow: You have no idea.

Barbossa: You've always run away from a fight!

Jack Sparrow: I have not!

Barbossa: You have so!

Jack Sparrow: Have not!

Barbossa: Have so!

Jack Sparrow: Have not!

Barbossa: Have so!

Jack Sparrow: Have not!

Barbossa: You have so and you know it!

Elizabeth Swann: [of the Pirate Lords and their crews fighting each other] This is madness.

Jack Sparrow: This is politics.

Lord Cutler Beckett: Jack, I just remembered... I have this magic compass that points to whatever I want. So what do I need YOU for?

[aims his gun at Sparrow]

Jack Sparrow: It points to the thing you want the most, and that is NOT Shipwreck Cove.

Lord Cutler Beckett: Then what is, Jack?

Jack Sparrow: Me... dead.

Jack Sparrow: How's mum?

[Captain Teague holds up a decayed shrunken head]

Jack Sparrow: [revolted] ... She looks great.

[Jack is ushered into Cutler Beckett's study]

Lord Cutler Beckett: [gazing out a window] Curious. Your friends appear to be quite desperate, Jack. Perhaps they no longer believe that a gathering of squabbling pirates can defeat the Flying Dutchman. And so despair leads to betrayal. And you and I are no strangers to betrayal, are we, Jack?

[Jack, who has been looking through various containers, stops and glances at a P mark on his arm]

Lord Cutler Beckett: [turning to face Sparrow] It's not here, Jack.

Jack Sparrow: What? What isn't?

Lord Cutler Beckett: The Heart of Davy Jones is safely aboard the Dutchman, and so unavailable for use as leverage to satisfy your debt to the good Captain.

Jack Sparrow: By my reckoning, that debt has been settled.

Lord Cutler Beckett: By your death... yet here you are.

Jack Sparrow: Close your eyes and pretend it's all a bad dream. That's how I get by.

Jack Sparrow: Mr. Gibbs!

Gibbs: Aye, cap'n?

Jack Sparrow: You may throw my hat if you wish.

Gibbs: Aye, AYE!

[Gibbs throws Jack's hat into the celebrating crowd]

Gibbs: Hurrah!

Jack Sparrow: Now go and get it.

[Jack confronts himself aboard the Flying Dutchman]

Jack Sparrow: As per the overall plan, you are aboard the Flying Dutchman...

Jack Sparrow: However, there is this little kink of being stuck in the brig...

Jack Sparrow: Go away!

Jack Sparrow: What, back to the Locker?

Jack Sparrow: Not without you, Jackie boy.

Jack Sparrow: [pulling himself out of the boat] Stab the heart... live forever. If you're in the brig... who's to stab the heart?

Jack Sparrow, Will Turner, Elizabeth Swann, Barbossa, Gibbs: FIRE!

Jack Sparrow: William, tell me somethin'. Have you come because you need my help to save a certain distressin' damsel? Or... rather, damsel in distress? Either one...

Will Turner: No.

Jack Sparrow: Well, then you wouldn't be here, would you? So you can't be here! Q.E.D. - you're not really here!

Jack Sparrow: Think like the whelp, think like the whelp, think like the whelp...

[sees bars]

Jack Sparrow: Half barrel hinges...

Jack Sparrow: [grabs a wooden board] Leverage...

[lifts gate off hinges, as Will did in the first movie]

Elizabeth Swann: I propose an exchange. Will leaves with us. And you can take Jack.

Will Turner: Done.

Jack Sparrow: Undone.

Lord Cutler Beckett: Done.

Barbossa: [to Elizabeth] Jack's one of the nine pirate lords. You have no right!

Elizabeth Swann: [with defiance] King!

Jack Sparrow: [airily waving a fan] ... and then you can take care of Barbossa and Turner, specially Turner. The rest go aboard with me to Shipwreck Cove, where I will hand you over the pirates and you will NOT hand me over to Jones.

Lord Cutler Beckett: And what becomes of Miss Swann?

Jack Sparrow: [now serious] What interest is she to you?

[Beckett smiles at Jack's change of mood]

[Scarlett and Giselle are fighting, Jack watches the Pearl sail away]

Jack Sparrow: Ladies, will you please shut it! Listen to me.

[to Giselle]

Jack Sparrow: Yes, I lied to you.

[to Scarlett]

Jack Sparrow: No, I don't love you.

[to Giselle]

Jack Sparrow: Of course it makes you look fat.

[to Scarlett]

Jack Sparrow: I've never been to Brussels.

[to Giselle]

Jack Sparrow: It is pronounced *egregious*.

[to Scarlett]

Jack Sparrow: By the way, no. I've never actually met Pizarro, but I love his pies.

[to both]

Jack Sparrow: And all of this pales to utter insignificance in light of the fact that my ship is once again gone. Savvy?

[Giselle slaps him, Scarlett slaps him, he slaps Gibbs]

Jack Sparrow: William, have you noticed something? Or rather, have you noticed something that's not there to be noticed?

Will Turner: You haven't raised an alarm.

Jack Sparrow: Odd, isn't it? Not as odd as this...

[referring to Will strapping the dead bodies of East India Co. soldiers to barrels and dropping them overboard]

Jack Sparrow: Come out with all this by your own son, did you?

Jack Sparrow: Mr. Sparrow?

Jack Sparrow: Aye, Captain.

Jack Sparrow: What say you about the conditions of this tack line?

Jack Sparrow: It be proper to my eyes, sir.

Jack Sparrow: Proper? It is neither proper nor suitable, sir. It is not acceptable, nor adequate. It is, in obvious fact, an abomination.

Jack Sparrow: [walking Scarlett and Giselle to the Black Pearl] Granted, it tends to list to port, and has been on occasion known to frighten young women. But I promise you, you will not be disappointed.

Scarlett: [seeing a dinghy instead of the Pearl] Is that it? The Black Pearl. Not very big.

Jack Sparrow: Love, that is a dinghy. My vessel is magnificent and fierce and huge-ish. And gone. Why is it gone?

Giselle: [sees a ship in distance] Is that it there?

Jack Sparrow: Yes, there it is! Why is it there?... It's much larger up close.

Barbossa: [during parlay on sandbar, to Will] You be the cur that led these wolves to our door?

Lord Cutler Beckett: Don't blame Turner, he was merely the tool of your betrayal. If you wish to see its grand architect, look to your left.

Jack Sparrow: [Barbossa, Elizabeth, and Jack look left. Jack looks at Elizabeth] My hands are clean in this, figuratively.

Will Turner: My actions were my own and to my own purpose. Jack had nothing to do with it.

Jack Sparrow: Well spoke, listen to the tool!

Jack Sparrow: I'm taking my ship and going the other way...

Elizabeth Swann: The Brethren Court is a council of pirates, and you're a pirate.

Will Turner: Win or not, Jack, you're not running away!

[Swann and Turner point their guns at Sparrow]

[Every pirate on the battlefield glares at Jack Sparrow]

Jack Sparrow: Parley...

Jack Sparrow: Can't spot it. Must be a tiny thing hiding somewhere behind the Pearl.

Jack Sparrow: Why would he do that? Because he's a lummox, isn't he? Well, we shall have a magnificent garden party, and you're not invited!

Jack Sparrow: [to Tia Dalma] You add an agreeable sense of the macabre to any delirium.

Jack Sparrow: If I may lend a machete to your intellectual thicket.

Davy Jones: You can do nothing without the key!

Jack Sparrow: I already have the key!

Davy Jones: [shows the key] No, you don't.

Jack Sparrow: Oh, that key.

Elizabeth Swann: Sao Feng is dead. He fell to the Flying Dutchman.

Mistress Ching: The plagued ship?

Jack Sparrow: He made you captain? They're giving the bloody title away now.

Gibbs: [Jack and Elizabeth climb back onto the Black Pearl] Thank goodness, Jack! The armada's still out there, the Endeavour is coming hard on starboard, and I think its time we embrace that oldest and noblest of pirate traditions.

Jack Sparrow: [looks out towards the Endeavour] Never actually been one for tradition... Close haul her! Luff the sails and lay her in irons!

Barbossa: Belay that, or we'll be a sittin' duck!

Jack Sparrow: Belay that belay that!

Jack Sparrow: [crew starts arguing with him] Belay! Belay! No! Stow! Shut it!

Will Turner: [after Jack suggests that someone else besides Will should kill Davey Jones] Who?

[notices Jack smugly grinning]

Will Turner: You?

Jack Sparrow: Death has a way of reshuffling one's priorities. I slip aboard the Dutchman, find the heart, take it, stab the beating thing, free your father from his debt, and you are free to be with your charming murderess.

Will Turner: And you're willing to cut your heart out? Bind yourself to the Dutchman, forever?

Jack Sparrow: No, mate. I'm free forever. Free to sail the seas beyond the edges of the map, free from death itself.

Will Turner: But you have to do the job, Jack. You have to ferry souls to the next world... or end up like Jones...

[makes a gesture of the tentacles Jones has on his face. Jack cringes and strokes his own beard]

Jack Sparrow: I haven't the face for tentacles. But, immortality has to count for something, eh? Oh...

[hands Will his magic compass]

Will Turner: What's this for?

Jack Sparrow: Think like me. It will come to you.

[leans forward and breathes his rummy breath into Will's face. Will staggers back and falls of the Pearl. Jack sends the last body tied to a barrel overboard next to him as the Pearl sails away]

Jack Sparrow: My regards to Davey Jones!

Will Turner: [pulls himself onto the barrel, glaring at the Pearl and Jack] I hate him!

Jack Sparrow: So what are you proposing?

Lord Cutler Beckett: A new deal. One that requires absolutely nothing from you, but information.

Jack Sparrow: Were I in a divulgatory mood, what were I to divulge?

Lord Cutler Beckett: Everything. Where are they meeting? What are they planning? What is the purpose of the nine pieces of eight?

Elizabeth Swann: Oh, will you ever forgive me?

Jack Sparrow: No.

Will Turner: I said to myself, think like Jack.

Jack Sparrow: This is what you've arrived at? Lead Beckett to Shipwreck Cove so as to gain his trust, accomplish your own ends? It's like you don't know me at all, mate. And how does your dearly beloved feel about this plan? Ah, you've not seen fit to trust her with it.

Elizabeth Swann: [after she sees her father in a boat sailing by the Black Pearl in Davy Jones's Locker] That's my father, we've made it back! Father! Father! Look here!

Jack Sparrow: [solemnly] Elizabeth, we're not back.

[Elizabeth's smile starts to fade]

Davy Jones: Ha ha... Lookie here boys. A lost bird. A lost bird that never learned to fly!

Jack Sparrow: To my great regret. But, it's never too late to learn!

[uses the Dead Man's Chest to trigger a line to pull him up to the Flying Dutchman's mast]

Elizabeth Swann: We've come to rescue you.

Jack Sparrow: Have you, now? It's very kind of you. But it would seem that as I possess a ship, and you don't... you're the ones in need of rescuing, and I'm not sure that I'm in the mood.

Davy Jones: [after Sparrow has been pulled to the mast of the Dutchman] The chest! Hand it over!

Jack Sparrow: I can set you free, mate!

Davy Jones: My freedom was forfeit long ago!

Elizabeth Swann: There will come a time when you have a chance to do the right thing.

Jack Sparrow: I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by.

Jack Sparrow: [holds up jar of dirt] Oi! Fishface! Lose something? Eh? Scungilli!

[falls down stairs, holds up jar again]

Jack Sparrow: Got it! Come to negotiate, eh? Have you, you slimy git? Look what I got.

Jack Sparrow: [sing-song] I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of dirt, and guess what's inside it!

Jack Sparrow: [with his back to Elizabeth, thinking that she is a man] Come to join my crew, lad? Welcome aboard!

Elizabeth Swann: I'm here to find the man I love.

Jack Sparrow: [startled] I'm deeply flattered, son, but my first and only love is the sea.

Elizabeth Swann: Meaning William Turner, Captain Sparrow.

Jack Sparrow: [turning around] Elizabeth!

[to Gibbs]

Jack Sparrow: Hide the rum.

Jack Sparrow: [empties bottle of rum] Why is the rum always gone?

Jack Sparrow: [stands up and staggers drunkenly] Oh... that's why.

Tia Dalma: Land is where you are safe, Jack Sparrow, and so you will carry land with you.

Jack Sparrow: Dirt. This is a jar of dirt.

Tia Dalma: Yes.

Jack Sparrow: ...Is the jar of dirt going to help?

Tia Dalma: If you don't want it, give it back.

Jack Sparrow: [greedily] No!

Tia Dalma: Then it helps.

Jack Sparrow: [to cannibals] *Alas*, my children! This is the day you shall always remember as the day that you almost...

[gets splashed by a wave]

Jack Sparrow: ...Captain Jack Sparrow.

Jack Sparrow: My tremendous intuitive sense of the female creature informs me that you are troubled.

Will Turner: You want me to find this?

Jack Sparrow: No. You want you to find this, because the finding of this finds you incapacitorially finding and or locating in your discovering the detecting of a way to save your dolly belle, ol' what's-her-face. Savvy?

Will Turner: This is going to save Elizabeth?

Jack Sparrow: How much do you know about Davy Jones?

Will Turner: Not much.

Jack Sparrow: Yeah, it's going to save Elizabeth.

Jack Sparrow: How did you get here?

Will Turner: Sea turtles, mate. A pair of them strapped to my feet.

Jack Sparrow: Not so easy, is it?

Jack Sparrow: You look bloody awful, what are you doing here?

Norrington: You hired me. I can't help it if your standards are lax.

Jack Sparrow: [immaturely] You smell funny.

Gibbs: So, we're setting out to find whatever this key unlocks?

Jack Sparrow: No. If we don't have the key, we can't open whatever we don't have that it unlocks. So what purpose would be served in finding whatever need be unlocked, which we don't have, without first having found the key what unlocks it?

Gibbs: So, we're setting out to find this key?

Jack Sparrow: Now you're not making any sense at all.

Jack Sparrow: Is this a dream?

'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: No.

Jack Sparrow: I thought not. If it were, there'd be rum.

'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: [hands him a bottle of rum]

Gibbs: Let's put some distance between us and this island and head out to open sea!

Jack Sparrow: Yes to the first, yes to the second, but only insofar as we keep to the shallows as much as possible.

Gibbs: That seems a bit contradictory, Captain.

Jack Sparrow: I have every faith in your reconciliatory navigational skills, Mr. Gibbs, now where is that monkey, I want to shoot something!

Jack Sparrow: So what's your plan, then?

Will Turner: I row over, search the ship until I find your bloody key.

Jack Sparrow: And if there are crewmen?

Will Turner: I cut down anyone in my path.

Jack Sparrow: [turns to Gibbs] I like it. Simple, easy to remember.

Jack Sparrow: [to Pintel and Ragetti] Guard the boat, mind the tide... don't touch my dirt.

Davey Jones: I wonder, Sparrow, can you live with this? Can you condemn an innocent man, a friend, to a lifetime of servitude in your name while you roam free?

Jack Sparrow: [thinks for a second] Yep. I'm good with it.

Jack Sparrow: Darling, I am truly unhappy to have to tell you this, but through an unfortunate and entirely unforeseeable series of circumstances that had nothing whatsoever to do with me, poor Will has been press-ganged into Davy Jones's crew.

Davey Jones: You have a debt to pay. You've been captain of the Black Pearl for thirteen years. That was our agreement.

Jack Sparrow: Technically, I was only captain for two years, then I was viciously mutinied upon.

Davey Jones: Then you were a poor captain, but a captain nonetheless! Have you not introduced yourself all these years as "Captain Jack Sparrow"?

Gibbs: Where's the Commodore?

Jack Sparrow: He fell behind.

Gibbs: [solemnly] My prayers be with him.

[suddenly brightens]

Gibbs: Best not wallow in our grief!

Norrington: Do excuse me while I kill the man who ruined my life.

Will Turner: Be my guest.

Jack Sparrow: Let us examine that claim for a moment, former Commodore, shall we? Who was it that, at the very moment you had a notorious pirate safely behind bars, saw fit to free said pirate and take your dearly beloved all to hisself, eh? So whose fault is it *really* that you've ended up a rum-pot deckhand what takes orders from pirates?

Norrington: ENOUGH!

[Jack somersaults off roof, Norrington turns to Will]

Norrington: Unfortunately Mr. Turner, he's right!

Elizabeth Swann: We're not getting out of this.

Norrington: Not with the chest. Into the boat.

[takes chest]

Elizabeth Swann: You're mad.

Norrington: Don't wait for me.

[runs away from the longboat with the chest]

Jack Sparrow: Uh, I say we respect his final wish.

Gibbs: [Tia Dalma just uncovered Jack's Black Spot] The Black Spot!

[he does a strange superstitous dance]

Ragetti: The Black Spot!

Pintel: Black Spot!

[Pintel and Ragetti do the same dance]

Jack Sparrow: My eyesight's as good as ever, just so you know.

Elizabeth Swann: Thank you, Jack.

Jack Sparrow: We're not free yet, love.

Elizabeth Swann: You came back. I always knew you were a good man.

[kisses him to distract him, then handcuffs him to the mast]

Elizabeth Swann: It's after you, not the ship. It's not us. This is the only way, don't you see?

[unconvincingly]

Elizabeth Swann: I'm not sorry.

Jack Sparrow: [almost understandingly] Pirate.

Elizabeth Swann: It's real!

Norrington: You actually were telling the truth.

Jack Sparrow: I do that quite a lot. Yet people are always surprised.

Will Turner: With good reason.

Tia Dalma: You know I demand payment.

Jack Sparrow: I brought payment. Look.

[brings out the monkey in a cage, shoots him]

Jack Sparrow: An undead monkey! Top that!

Tia Dalma: [releases the monkey from the cage]

Gibbs: [muttered] No...

[Speaking clearly]

Gibbs: You've no idea how long it took us to catch that.

Tia Dalma: The payment is fair...

Gibbs: [as Jack steps onto the ship] Not quite according to plan...

Jack Sparrow: Complications arose, ensued, were overcome.

[repeated line]

Jack Sparrow: Oh bugger.

Norrington: [drunk and angry] So am I worthy to serve under Captain Jack Sparrow...

[he draws his pistol and points it at Jack, who is hiding behind a pole]

Norrington: ... or should I just kill you now?

Jack Sparrow: [tries and fails to hide behind his pole] You're hired!

Norrington: Sorry. Old habits and all that.

[smiles and prepares to pull the trigger]

Jack Sparrow: Mr. Gibbs.

Gibbs: Captain.

Jack Sparrow: We have a need to travel upriver.

Gibbs: By "need," do you mean a trifling need? Fleeting? As in, say, a passing fancy?

Jack Sparrow: No, a resolute and unyielding need.

Jack Sparrow: We are very much alike, you and I, I and you... us.

Elizabeth Swann: Oh. Except for a sense of honor and decency and a moral center. And personal hygiene.

Jack Sparrow: [sniffs his armpit and looks back] Trifles.

Elizabeth Swann: Jack, the letters, give them back.

Jack Sparrow: No. Persuade me.

Elizabeth Swann: You do know Will taught me how to handle a sword.

Jack Sparrow: As I said, persuade me.

Gibbs: [Jack's hat is tossed overboard by the monkey while the Black Pearl is fleeing the Kraken] Jack's hat!

[the crew gathers at the rail]

Gibbs: Clear about!

Jack Sparrow: No, no! Leave it!

[the whole crew stares at him incredulously]

Jack Sparrow: Run!

[he runs away]

Gibbs: [he looks at the crew] Back to yer stations, the lot o' ye!

[he finds Jack hiding underneath the stairs]

Gibbs: Jack?

Jack Sparrow: Shhh.

Gibbs: For the love of Mother and Child, Jack, what's coming after us?

Jack Sparrow: [short pause] Nothing.

Jack Sparrow: [after being covered in mucus after the Kraken roars at him] Not so bad...

[wipes the slime from his face]

Jack Sparrow: [he looks down and sees his old hat] Oh!

[reaches for his hat and puts it on]

Jack Sparrow: 'Ello, beastie.

[smiles and draws his sword]

Jack Sparrow: No, no! More wood! Big fire! I am chief! Want big fire!

Jack Sparrow: You mistrust me? Listen, you can mistrust him, trust me.

Gibbs: [after Jack shoots the monkey] You know that don't do no good.

Jack Sparrow: It does me.

Tia Dalma: You have a touch of destiny about you, William Turner.

Will Turner: You know me?

Tia Dalma: You want to know me.

Jack Sparrow: There'll be no knowing here! We've come for help and were not leaving without it.

[to Tia]

Jack Sparrow: I thought I knew you...

Jack Sparrow: No worries! Tia Dalma and I go way back... thick as thieves, nigh inseparable we are... were... have been... before...

Gibbs: I'll watch yer back.

Jack Sparrow: It's me front I'm worried about.

Gibbs: [to Will] Mind the boat.

Will Turner: [to Ragetti] Mind the boat.

Ragetti: [to Pintel] Mind the boat.

Pintel: [to Marty] Mind the boat.

Marty: [to Cotton's parrot] Mind the boat.

Cotton's Parrot: [to Cotton] Mind the boat.

[It flies off, leaving Cotton to pout and sit back down in the boat]

Jack Sparrow: How are we going?

Gibbs: Including those four? That gives us... four.

Jack Sparrow: Er, Mr. Gibbs...

Gibbs: Aye.

Jack Sparrow: I feel sullied and unusual.

Jack Sparrow: My compass is unique.

Norrington: *Unique* here having the meaning of *broken*?

Jack Sparrow: True enough.

Jack Sparrow: [to Elizabeth] You know, these clothes do not flatter you at all. It should be a dress or nothing. I happen to have no dress in my cabin.

Jack Sparrow: Ah! A heading. Set sail in a... uh... a general... that way! direction.

Jack Sparrow: I want my jar of dirt!

Jack Sparrow: It's funny what a man will do to forestall his final judgment.

'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: You made a deal with him too, Jack. He raised the Pearl from the depths for you. Thirteen years you've been her captain.

Jack Sparrow: Technically...

'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: You won't be able to talk yourself out of this. The terms that apply to me apply to you as well. One soul, bound to crew a hundred years upon his ship.

Jack Sparrow: Yes, but the Flying Dutchmen already has a captain, so there's really...

'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: Then it's the locker for you! Jones' terrible leviathan will find you, and drag the Pearl back to the depths and you along with it.

Jack Sparrow: Any idea when Jones might release said terrible beastie?

'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: I've already told you, Jack. Your time is up. He comes now.

Tia Dalma: You know of Davy Jones? A man of the sea, a great sailor. Until he run afoul of that which vexes all men.

Will Turner: What vexes all men?

Tia Dalma: What indeed.

Gibbs: The sea?

Pintel: Sums?

Ragetti: The dichotomy of good and evil?

Jack Sparrow: A woman.

Tia Dalma: A woman. He fell in love.

Gibbs: No, no, I heard it was the sea he fell in love with.

Tia Dalma: [annoyed] Same story, different versions. And all are true. See, it was a woman as changing and harsh and untamable as the sea. Him never stopped loving her. But the pain it caused was to much to live with, but not enough to cause him to die.

Will Turner: What exactly did he put into the chest?

Tia Dalma: Him heart.

Ragetti: Literally or figuratively?

Pintel: He couldn't literally put his heart in a chest. Could he?

Tia Dalma: It was not worth feeling what small, fleeting joy life brings.

Jack Sparrow: Gentlemen, what do keys do?

Leech: Keys... unlock... *things*?

Cotton's Parrot: [squawk] Walk the plank!

Jack Sparrow: [pulls out gun and points it at the bird] What did the bird say?

Will Turner: Jack, Elizabeth is in danger!

Jack Sparrow: Have you considered keeping more watchful eye on her? Maybe just lock her up somewhere.

Jack Sparrow: 'Ello beastie.

Jack Sparrow: You know, Lizzie, I happen to be captain of a ship. And, as captain, I could perform... a mar-i-age. Right here, on this deck, right now.

Jack Sparrow: [pulls out sword and threatens Will] Can't let you do that, William. 'Cause if Jones is dead, who's to call his terrible beastie off the hunt, eh? Now, if you please. The key.

Will Turner: [Pulls his sword on Jack] I keep the promises I make, Jack. I intend to free my father. I hope you're here to see it.

Norrington: [Norrington draws his sword, points it at Will] I can't let you do that, either. So sorry.

Jack Sparrow: [to Norrington] I knew you'd warm up to me eventually.

Norrington: [Norrington points his sword at Jack] Lord Beckett desires the contents of that chest. I deliver it, I get my life back.

Jack Sparrow: Ah. The dark side of ambition.

Norrington: Oh, I prefer to see it as the promise of redemption.

Jack Sparrow: Have you not met Will Turner? He's noble, heroic - terrific soprano. Worth at least four... maybe three and a half. And did I happen to mention... he's in love? With a girl. Due to be married. Betrothed. Dividing him from her and her from him would only be half as cruel as actually allowing them to be joined in holy matrimony, eh?

Jack Sparrow: [to Elizabeth] One word love: curiosity. You long for freedom. You long to do what you want to do because you want it. To act on selfish impulse. You want to see what it's like. One day you won't be able to resist.

'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: Jones's terrible leviathan will find you, and drag the Pearl back to the depths and you along with it!

Jack Sparrow: Any idea when Jones might release said terrible beastie?

'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: I already told you, Jack. Your time is up.

[he grabs Jack's hand and folds it into a fist, as if handing him something]

'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: It comes now, drawn with ravenous hunger to the man what bears the Black Spot.

[Jack unfolds his hand and sees the Black Spot appear on his palm]

Tia Dalma: The compass you bartered from me it cannot lead you to this?

Jack Sparrow: Maybe. Why?

Tia Dalma: Ah, Jack Sparrow does not know what he wants.

Jack Sparrow: [heavily] She's only a ship, mate.

Elizabeth Swann: Why doesn't your compass work?

Jack Sparrow: ...My compass works fine.

Jack Sparrow: To what do I owe the pleasure of your carbuncle?

'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: He sent me. Davy Jones.

Jack Sparrow: Savvy?

Jack Sparrow: [to Norrington] Still rooting for you, mate!

Jack Sparrow: [describing Will to the cannibal villagers] Lum se se, eunuch-y. Snip snip.

Will Turner: That's the Flying Dutchman? It doesn't look like much.

Jack Sparrow: Neither do you. Do not underestimate.

Jack Sparrow: [after searching the shattered jar of dirt for Davy Jones' heart] Where is it? Where is the thump-thump?

Jack Sparrow: [talking about Jack's debt to Jones] You already have my payment. One soul to serve on your ship is already over there.

Davey Jones: One soul is not equal to another.

Jack Sparrow: Ah-ha! So, we've established my proposal as sound in principle. Now, we're just haggling over price.

Jack Sparrow: [Jack looks at the sleeping crew] As you were, gents.

Will Turner: This... is going to save Elizabeth?

Jack Sparrow: How much do you know about Davey Jones?

Will Turner: Not much.

Jack Sparrow: Yeah, it's gonna save Elizabeth.

Jack Sparrow: [to Elizabeth about Will who's knocked out] Leave 'im lie... unless you're planning to use him to hit somethin' with.

Marty: [Marty picks up the cloth] It's a key!

Jack Sparrow: No! Much more better. It is a *drawing* of a key.

Jack Sparrow: Gentlemen... what do keys do?

Leech: Keys unlock... things?

Gibbs: And whatever this key unlocks, inside there's something valuable. So we're setting out to find whatever this key unlocks!

Jack Sparrow: No. If we don't have the key, we can't open whatever it is we don't have that it unlocks. So what purpose would be served in finding whatever need be unlocked, which we don't have, without first having found the key what unlocks it?

Gibbs: So we're going after this key!

Jack Sparrow: You're not making any sense at all.

Marty: Do we have a heading?

Jack Sparrow: Ah! A heading! Set sail in a general...

[points around vaguely]

Jack Sparrow: *That* way direction.

Will Turner: If we can outrun her, we can take her. We should turn and fight.

Jack Sparrow: Why fight when you can negotiate?