Jack "Duece" Cooper Quotes in Ed (1996)
Jack "Duece" Cooper Quotes:
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Jack "Duece" Cooper: I am going to spank that monkey!
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Stats Jefferson: You play major league?
Jack "Duece" Cooper: No.
Stats Jefferson: Minor league?
Jack "Duece" Cooper: No.
Stats Jefferson: Anybody ever see you play?
Jack "Duece" Cooper: My mom.
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Jack "Duece" Cooper: [to a spider] Hey Charlotte, where's Wilbur?
[cut to his mom serving up ham]
Jack "Duece" Cooper: Wilbur, Mom you didn't.
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Lydia: Two fingers is a curve ball, right?
Jack "Duece" Cooper: That's a peace sign, I think.
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Jack "Duece" Cooper: [Ed's trying to get in the house pretending to need the bathroom] How dumb do I look? You wanted to play hardball remember? There's a sandbox down there so go pee your socks off, and *quit* banging on the door.
[closes the door and Ed breaks it down]
Jack "Duece" Cooper: What the?
Browse more character quotes from Ed (1996)