Jack Colton Quotes in The Jewel of the Nile (1985)

[Omar has put Jack and Joan in a deathtrap copied from one of Joan's own books]

Jack Colton: So how'd they get out?

Joan Wilder: What?

Jack Colton: In "The Savage Secret".

Joan Wilder: Oh. Um... Jesse had a knife hidden in his boot. You wouldn't happen to have a knife, would you?

Jack Colton: I'm not even wearing underwear.

[while surrounded by native Africans]

Jack Colton: Just keep smiling. Maybe they'll think we're with National Geographic.

Jack Colton: It's looking more like 90-10, eh Kumquat?

Jack Colton: [Jack points flair gun at F-16 Pilot] OK, flyboy estimated time of departure is right now.

Jack Colton: All right!, If we get out of this alive, I'm going to kill you. Let's go, come on!

[Jack, Joan and the Jewel are under fire from Omar's soldiers]

Jack Colton: Okay, now let's go.

Joan Wilder: [refering to the Jewel] Wait a minute, Jack. He's coming with us.

Jack Colton: Don't start with me, Joan! I've come halfway across Africa to rescue you!

Joan Wilder: Resuce me? I was doing fine without you!

Jewel: [to Jack] Please, I am guide. I can help you.

Jack Colton: I don't need a guide! I need a miracle!

Jack Colton: Why does everything got to be your way?

Joan Wilder: My way? It wasn't my idea to take off and sail around the world with you on your boat for the last six months!

Jewel: I like this. You talk to each other like this often?

Jack Colton: [to the Jewel] Well, let me tell you what I had to put up. Three months ago, we're moored off the Canary Islands, midnight, sound asleep. A boat of three crazed Joan Wilder fans decide that they want the anchor of the Angeline for a souvenir! We were drifting for days!

Joan Wilder: Well, do you remember the incident at Gibraltar, Jack?

Jack Colton: Oh, come on. Not that again.

Joan Wilder: He has to meet me at the governor's mansion for a formal dinner, and you show up with the entire Italian National League Basketball team!

Jack Colton: Hey, they were hungry.