Inspector Cobb Quotes in Die Hard with a Vengeance (1995)

Inspector Cobb: [to Simon] I can appreciate your feelings for McClane. But believe me, the jerk isn't worth it. He's stepped on so many toes in this department, by this time next month he's gonna be a security guard. His own wife wants nothing to do with him, and he's about two steps shy of becoming a full-blown alcoholic.

John McClane: [whispering] One step, *one* step.

[after dropping McClane off in Harlem with a sign that says "I hate niggers"]

Inspector Cobb: We'll be back to pick you up in fifteen minutes.

John McClane: Take your time. I expect to be dead in four.

Zeus: [in Walter's office] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! I'm not going anywhere.

Inspector Cobb: Simon says you got to go.

Zeus: I'm not jumping through hoops for some psycho! That's a white man, with white problems. You deal with him. Call me when he crosses 110th Street.

Charles Weiss: [coming into Walter's office] A nut who knows a lot about bombs. We found this in a playground. Professional. Very cool stuff. You know...

[thuds the bomb on Cobb's desk]

Charles Weiss: Boom!

Inspector Cobb: You think you should slam it around like that, Charlie?

Charles Weiss: It's unmixed. You can't hurt it. This stuff is cutting edge. It's a binary liquid.

Inspector Cobb: A what?

Charles Weiss: Like epoxi. Two liquids.

[puts a dab of the clear liquid on Cobb's desk]

Charles Weiss: Now, either one by itself,

[hits it with his shoe]

Charles Weiss: you got nothing. But, mix them...

[swirls a paper clip in both liquids and throws it at a chair, the mixture explodes violently knocking the chair across the room]

Connie Kowalski: [yelling] Charlie, you're gonna be wearin' that chair up your ass!

Inspector Cobb: [yelling] Christ almighty, Charlie!

Charles Weiss: Like I said very cool stuff. Now, with a package like this, you get a warning. Now, the bomb has to arm itself. You'll see the red liquid pump into the clear before it detonates.

John McClane: How long before?

Charles Weiss: Ten seconds, two minutes, it could be anything. But, once it's mixed, be somewhere else.

Simon: [over the phone in Walter's office] s there a detective named McClane there?

Inspector Cobb: He's on suspension.

Simon: No, Walter, he's not. Not today.

Inspector Cobb: Who is this?

Simon: Call me Simon.

Inspector Cobb: What do you want?

Simon: I want to play a game.

Inspector Cobb: What kind of game?

Simon: "Simon Says". Simon's going to tell Lt. McClane what to do, and Lt. McClane is going to do it. Noncompliance will result in a penalty.

Inspector Cobb: What penalty?

Simon: Another big bang in a very public place.

John McClane: Why me? What does he got to do with me?

Inspector Cobb: I have no idea, he just said it had to be you.

John McClane: It's nice to be needed.

Dr. Schiller: They want you to know who's doing it to you. So this name Simon is probably not an alias. It's probably Simon or some variation.

Joe Lambert: [reading a rap sheet] Simon, Robert E. Busted in '86. Extortion. Kidnapping. 10 to 15. Did 7 years for good behavior. Released on a state work furlough two months ago.

Inspector Cobb: Check it.

John McClane: [Rick tosses something to John] Thanks, Rick. Bob Simon was a bankrupt businessman who kidnapped his partner's daughter. He's a fuck-up, not a psycho. The guy we're looking for is nuts.

Inspector Cobb: [over the phone after telling him there are dump trucks driving on the FDR highway carrying gold bricks] Have you been drinking, McClane?

John McClane: No, not since this morning.

Inspector Cobb: [over the phone with Simon in Walter's office] McClane is a toilet bug.

John McClane: [puzzled, he whispers] A toilet bug?

Simon: [over the phone in Walter's office] Where are my pigeons now?

Inspector Cobb: Pigeons?

Simon: I had two pigeons, bright and gay, fly from me the other day. Why was it they did go? You cannot tell, you do not know.

Inspector Cobb: You mean McClane?

Simon: No, I mean Santa Claus.

Inspector Cobb: [Commenting on Jeremy Secker's arrest for murder] Son hates his father, he's hot-blooded, they quarrel and the son loses his temper. Anyway we've got him all locked up now, safe and sound.

Paul Paxton: But Jeremy did not hate his father. He was the most even-tempered...

Inspector Cobb: If you came here to obstruct justice...

Paul Paxton: I came here because you sent for me!