Helena Quotes in

Helena: [addressing women in the corral] Everyone up! A few of you leave tomorrow morning. Do everything you can to please the buyers and you'll lead a life of luxury - jewels - and we all like jewels. And you never can tell, girls, you could meet the man of your life. He'll take care of you. Not bad, eh?

Betty: You can count me out. We're not merchandise to be bought and sold. You got most of us here with the promise of work. Nobody mentioned being locked up in this filthy hole.

Helena: Shut up, girl. You don't like it? Well, too bad. Follow orders or you get some of this.

[brandishes whip]

Valentine: I'm an important person you see. I have a tower, a wonderful tower it was, tall and grand.

Helena: Are you?

Valentine: Of course.

Helena: Where is your tower then?

Valentine: We aren't talking... We had an argument, you see.

Helena: If I tell you something weird... will you think I'm crazy?

Valentine: Yes. I expect so.

Helena: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Valentine: Absolutely. If we put little wheels on the bottoms of our shoes, we could just roll around everywhere...

Valentine: You're hurt. Wait here.

Helena: What about you?

Valentine: Oh, I'm a panther. I shall slip unnoticed through the darkness... like a dark, unnoticeable slippy thing.

Helena: You pathetic creep!

Valentine: Rocks and logs can bite like dogs, but words will never hurt me!

Helena: I want to run away and join real life.

Joanne: Real life? You couldn't handle real life.

Valentine: Right... this is where I stop.

Helena: Giants Orbiting?

Valentine: Sounds a bit iffy, doesn't it? I'll be here when you get back. If you get back.

Helena: [of the Shadow Princess, her double in the real world, who's probably having a good time] Yeah, eating chips and snogging boys and smoking and everything!

Helena: You are not my boyfriend, you know, even if this is my mom's dream.

Helena: Riddle? Riddle. So have you thought of an answer yet?

Gryphon: You can't pass. I give up, I think, no wait, wait... Fine. What's the answer?

Helena: Okay. It's a herring.

Gryphon: But a herring isn't green.

Helena: You can paint it green.

Gryphon: But a herring doesn't hang on a wall.

Helena: You can nail it to a wall.

Gryphon: But a herring doesn't whistle!

Helena: Oh, come on. I just put that in to stop it from being too obvious.

Helena: [Trying to summon Valentine's tower to stop from being consumed by shadow swarm] You know, sometimes it helps to apologize to others, even if it isn't your fault.

Valentine: I'M SORRY.

Joanne: All those kids in there want to run away and join the circus.

Helena: Great, they can have my life. I want to run away and join real life.

Black Queen: You need a pretty frock and a happy smile.

Helena: A smile?

Black Queen: With a smile on your face everything will seem brighter because from now on we are... what?

Helena: I don't know.

Black Queen: Tell her.

Black Queen's Guard: Uh, not at home to Mr. Grumpy, your majesty.

Black Queen: Exactly.

Helena: [during opening credits, playing with sock puppets] Ha! You may think I'm a hardhearted black sock, but underneath this dark woolly exterior is a naked pink foot.

Helena: You useless, cake-hogging coward!

Valentine: I did not hog that cake!

Helena: I'm not anyone

[pause]

Helena: I'm... me!

Valentine: What did you say your name was?

Helena: Helena.

Valentine: Helena. Helen. Helen-nun-nuh... it's a bit drab, isn't it? You know, you should think about changing that. Go for something with a bit of dignity and style, mixed with a bit of romance. Something like... 'Valentine'.

Helena: Why? What's your name?

Valentine: Valentine.

Valentine: No no no, it's really gotta feel like it's being rejected. Grr, horrible, offensive, badly constructed book.

[flies away on book]

Helena: Right, umm... Nasty... Poorly paced book, with a soppy ending that I didn't believe in FOR ONE MINUTE!

[flies after Valentine]

[last lines]

Valentine: You know, I've always wanted to work in the circus.

Helena: Um, good. You'd have made a lousy waiter.

[laughing]

Valentine: [laughing] Yeah... What?

Nurse: Listen, I don't want you tiring her out.

Helena: What do you think I'm going to do? Take her dancing?

Helena: Where's your fruit? I brought you fruit yesterday.

[looks over at other patient; leans in close to Joanne]

Helena: She didn't take it, did she? Did she?

Joanne: [looks over; chuckles] No.

Helena: She lost her teeth yesterday. I said: "If Mum were here, she'd find them. She's amazing at finding things." She said: "If your Mum could find them, she must be a miracle worker."

Joanne: They'll be staring her in the face. They always are.

Helena: They were in the fridge.

Valentine: This place is ready to collapse into a heap of rubble. It can't be safe.

Helena: You're such a coward. It's perfectly- WAAAAHH!

[she falls through a hole in the floor]

Valentine: [looking down the hole] Coward, eh? I prefer to think of myself as... Prudent. Cautious. And unlike some people I could mention, STILL UP HERE!

Helena: [talking about the charm] What does it look like?

Prime Minister: I don't know.

Helena: Well... how big is it?

Prime Minister: I don't know.

Helena: Well... what kind of places could it be in?

Prime Minister: I don't know.

Helena: What do you know?

Prime Minister: I think I'd know it if I saw it.

Helena: Would you?

Prime Minister: I don't know... What if I have seen it and I didn't know it. What if it was the chicken!

Helena: It's not your dream, mom, it's mine.

Joanne: [giggles] That's the kind of thing people say in dreams.

[repeated line]

Helena: Oh, spite, oh hell.

Helena: I am your spaniel. And Demetrius, the more you beat me, I will fawn on you. Use me - but as your spaniel. Spurn me, strike me, neglect me, lose me, but give me leave, unworthy as I am, to follow you.

Boris Yellnikoff: [to audience] I happen to hate New Year's celebrations. Everybody desperate to have fun. Trying to celebrate in some pathetic little way. Celebrate what? A step closer to the grave? That's why I can't say enough times, whatever love you can get and give, whatever happiness you can filch or provide, every temporary measure of grace, whatever works. And don't kid yourself. Because its by no means up to your own human ingenuity. A bigger part of your existence is luck, than you'd like to admit. Christ, you know the odds of your fathers one sperm from the billions, finding the single egg that made you. Don't think about it, you'll have a panic attack.

Melodie St. Ann Celestine: Boris, what are you doing? Who're you talking to?

Boris Yellnikoff: What? There's people out there watching us!

Helena: What?

Marietta: Out there?

Boris Yellnikoff: Yeah, they're watching... well, there was when we started. I don't know how many are left.

Melodie St. Ann Celestine: Does anybody see anybody out there?

Marietta: Out there? No!

Melodie St. Ann Celestine: Oh Boris...

Boris Yellnikoff: [to audience] See? I'm the only one that sees the whole picture. That's what they mean by genius.

[last lines]

Helena: Is it dark yet?

Sgt. John Berlin: No. It's getting kinda red...

Helena: I remember red.

Helena: A woman is something soft; something warm when you feel her. When she's naked. When she's touched. Discovered. You see that things happen inside of her. She opens up. Sometimes a woman is sad. Sometimes she's angry. Helpless. Beautiful. Sometimes she's strong. She's still only that one woman. Talk to her - in deep whispers. Tell her what you're doing, what you see. Move slowly. Tell her you're inside of her. Tell her how it feels. Touch her. Use your tongue. Your breath. When she's about to come, she'll grab for you. But don't let her come. Make her wait. Tease her. Play with her. Make her feel. She may touch herself. She's so sensitive now. You can't be afraid. Take her. Take her.

Doctor Nick Cavanaugh: Make a wish.

Helena: They never come true.

Doctor Nick Cavanaugh: Mine has.

Helena: Alright, girls. Let's get our minds off our plumbing.

Libby: Plumbing?

[giggles]

Libby: Helena!

Norine Blake: You know what your friend, Kay used to say about you? That you were a neuter. Like a mule.

Helena: I'd heard that. Thanks.

Helena: Who was that girl in the church?

Jacques: Just some girl I've met.She was nice.

Helena: I saw you how you looked her.And it wasn't just a ordinary look.

Helena: Something happened on this property. Something so terrible, it stained the land. Certain acts of psychic violence... The truly evil ones echo throughout time... Like ripples spreading across a pond.

Helena: What do you want?

Tasha: I want world peace

[in a fake American accent]

Tasha: , I want Prada shoes and I want you to know why you have been sending us texts, you stupid geeky little bitch.

Helena: What are you talking about?

Khalillah: We're talking about you sending us texts

Helena: Why would I?

Tasha: Because you're a twisted dyke slut, how the hell would I know?

Helena: Why don't you grow up?

Alexis: [to Justine] So a few of us are going to Bradly's later for a party and...

Helena: Um inappropriate she's coming over to my house to watch "atonement" tonight

Alexis: You can do that tomorrow night or never

[as helicopters drop special sound-emitting floats to attract the swarm to its doom]

Helena: Won't the noise of the helicopters drown out your sound?

Brad Crane: No. It's an entirely different sonic level.

Helena: You sonofabitch!

Col Klaus Meyer: Fuck you, hell-whore!

Helena: I am no animal to be chained. Release me and the forces I serve will grant you powers beyond your wildest dreams.

Col Klaus Meyer: So said Lucifer in the desert to our Lord Jesus Christ.

Helena: Surely that holy name turns to poison in your mouth, Nazi.

Col Klaus Meyer: You cannot divide us demon, I will send you back to the darkness.

Dickie: [at grave] What are you doing here?

Helena: I'm just visiting Valentin.

Dickie: Oh him. The great decomposer.

Fred: Why do I love you?

Héléna: Because I'm an amazing woman.

Fred: Why don't you love me?

Héléna: Because I don't have the guts.

Fred: Are you lazy?

Héléna: Terribly.

Fred: Who does the cooking at your house?

Héléna: The cook.

Fred: And the housework?

Héléna: The housekeeper.

Fred: And the lovemaking?

Héléna: [to La préfète] Stop! Tell your story to someone else... because I don't give a fuck about all this bullshit.

The Commissioner: [after seeing his wife crying] Mrs. Kerman, is there a problem?

Héléna: No. I was just telling your wife that I don't give a fuck about her stories.

Fred: Oh yeah, there's a picture of you as a kid too. 9 years old, 60 pounds,

[laughs]

Fred: Oh, you were a looker even back then... I'll knock the price down to 10,000 if you let me keep it.

Héléna: Okay.

Héléna's Husband: [Helena is sporting a very ratted hairdo for a fancy dinner] What is that hairdo?

Héléna: Iroquois.

Héléna's Husband: What?

Héléna: Iroquois.

[the door opens, holds her hand up]

Héléna: How!