Harvey Bilchik Quotes in UHF (1989)

George Newman: Hey, Philo, you really worked beyond the ecology on this one, thanks!

Philo: I'm glad to have been of service, George. Well, it appears that my work on this planet is complete. I must now return to my homeworld... on the planet Zarquon.

George Newman: [dubious] Okay, well. Have fun!

[Philo leaves]

George Newman: [sees his uncle] Hey, uncle Harvey!

Harvey Bilchik: Hey, kid, way to go! I always knew you had it in you! You're okay!

[Behind them, unnoticed, Philo morphs into a weird alien and flashes away]

Esther Bilchik: [after Harvey gets home from playing poker, referring to the piece of paper in his pocket] What's this?

Harvey Bilchik: Oh, it's the deed to channel 62. I won it with a pair of 7s. I was bluffing.

Esther Bilchik: Channel 62? Never heard of it.

Harvey Bilchik: I'm not surprised. More people watch the fish tank at Leo's pet store.

R.J. Fletcher: Now wait just one minute! What do you think you're doing?

George Newman: [as Harvey signed the contract to save U-62] WE DID IT, THE STATION IS OURS!

[Everybody cheers as a happy fanfare music plays]

Harvey Bilchik: Wow, look at that!

R.J. Fletcher: [in anger] YOU CAN'T DO THIS! We had an agreement, remember? An oral contract. I'll sue them!

Harvey Bilchik: Ah, blow it out your ears, scuzzbag.

FCC Man: Are you R.J. Fletcher?

R.J. Fletcher: Who do you think I am?

FCC Man: I'm John Vector of the FCC. I notice that your station is late in filing for its license renewal this year. Now normally, this kind of violation is punishable by its stiff fine. But I've been watching you lately, you made a big impression on me. Yeah, I'm revoking your license. Effective immediately, you're off the air.

Pamela Finklestein: Pamela Finklestein here, coming to you with the most incredible turn of events. Not only has the once powerful corporate broadcasting giant been thoroughly crushed and defeated. But now as luck would have it, they've been completely stripped of their license by the FCC.