Hal Hefner Quotes in Rocket Science (2007)

Hal Hefner: There's a cello in your house now.

Ginny Ryerson: Have you ever felt like you can burn the world down?

Hal Hefner: Every day.

Hal Hefner: Could... uh, could... could you tell her that uh... I uh... I'm done with my... my ma... masturbation and she can see! Oh...

[Mrs. Ryerson shuts the door in his face]

Hal Hefner: And all it got me was... was a cello through her wi... window.

Ben Wekselbaum: You threw a cello? Through her window?

Hal Hefner: Yeah.

Ben Wekselbaum: How big was it?

Hal Hefner: I... I think it was sta... standard sym... symphony size.

Hal Hefner: That's god doing your dry cleaning.

[smiles]

Hal Hefner: God does dry cleaning. He wears a smock.

Hal Hefner: It's one of those two, love or revenge, I'm not really sure which one. But it's one of those two that made me throw a cello through somebody's window, so you figure it out.

Hal Hefner: No, ah, do you wanna know what it is?

Ben Wekselbaum: Yeah, "What it is, is... "?

Hal Hefner: What it. What it is, is, ah. It's, ah... is, ah, is. No. What, what it is, is.

[shouting]

Hal Hefner: It's spirit crushing, I said!

Ben Wekselbaum: An actual cello?

Hal Hefner: Well, it took a bunch of throws but, but ah, you know, I'm good for a bunch.

Hal Hefner: [sees the Ryerson's approaching] There's a cello in your house now.

Hal Hefner: You know, Ginny said I won't be her real partner for months. And until then, I'm, like... the mascot. The disfluent mascot. The disfluent mascot who's not getting a BJ.

Heston: Like an aardvark.

Hal Hefner: No, that was a joke, Heston... there isn't a debate mascot.

Heston: I, for some reason, was convinced that it was an aardvark.

Hal Hefner: No.

Heston: C'est la vie.

Hal Hefner: Um... but I'll have a slice of the, of your, one of your, um, a slice of, the, the p-p... the... the the pizza.

Pizza Server: [puts one slice of pizza on a plate] You can pay me when you're through.

Hal Hefner: You know why don't I make it not just on... not jus not o-one not of the not one slice of the but uh I'll uh I'll have uh not one.

Pizza Server: I'm gonna close up in a bit, why don't you just take all three. Otherwise they're gettin' trashed.

[puts two more slices on the plate]

Hal Hefner: [raises hands in triumph] Yes...

Hal Hefner: You know, someday you'll find love and then everything will be different.

Townsend Secretary: Are you her little brother? You look like you could be her little brother.

Hal Hefner: I'm... her ex-lover.

Ben Wekselbaum: It's all so pointless. That's the realization I came to at States last year. Life is nothing but repetition, the same thing over and over. Somebody might give you a trophy and that's supposed to mean you're making progress but there's no such thing. The fights you fight today are the fights you fight untill you die.

Hal Hefner: Yeah, be that as it may.

Ben Wekselbaum: Sure, be that as it may...

Hal Hefner: Wait! It is not some college application bullshit that is, that is like the driving force here or any bullshit.

Ben Wekselbaum: I'm sure.

Hal Hefner: The big city is, uh, is, is Trenton?

Ben Wekselbaum: That's right