Guy Noir Quotes in A Prairie Home Companion (2006)

Guy Noir: A lot of good people up there on the stage. A lot of them. I mean, I'm a man of the world like yourself. But these folks put their lives into this.

Axeman: Now they can put their lives into something else. That's the beauty of the world. There's always something to put your life into, isn't there? It's like the scripture tells us, you have to lose your life before you can find it.

Axeman: The plaster around the proscenium is beautiful. We should really be taping this.

Guy Noir: It's a live radio show.

Axeman: Videotape, for historical purposes.

Guy Noir: The show had been on the air since Jesus was in the 3rd grade.

Guy Noir: And her hair! It was what God had in mind when he said "Let there be..."

Al, Stage Manager: Hair, right?

Guy Noir: She had a Mount Rushmore t-shirt on, and those guys never looked so good. Especially Jefferson and Lincoln. Kind of bloated but happy.

Rhonda Johnson: Hey, that was a terrific eulogy you gave old man Soderbergh at his memorial service.

Garrison Keillor: Thank you.

Guy Noir: Too bad the old coot couldn't have been there to hear it.

Yolanda Johnson: Yeah... and to have missed it by just a few days.

Guy Noir: They got old, babe. They started thinking about ease and comfort. Then I figure, they saw a brochure about an island with palm trees and an azure sky and miles of sand, and they thought: ''Hey! Ah! Ah! We don't have to suffer through these miserable Minnesota winters. We don't have to freeze our butts off waiting for our bus to come, our bus has come. It's here. We'll leave the business to the kids and we'll head for paradise and to hell with it.'' Only trouble is, the kids had already gone down to paradise ahead of them. So then, a big corporation down in Texas offered then a gazillion dollars for it. Texans. Sure. They talk funny and their eyes don't focus and their flesh is rotting and falling of, but hey. You know. So what? Yeah, nobody's perfect and, Uh... Money is money, so the Soderbergs took the dough. End of story. Do you have any tweezers?