Gus Portokalos Quotes in My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002)

Gus Portokalos: You know, the root of the word Miller is a Greek word. Miller come from the Greek word "milo," which is mean "apple," so there you go. As many of you know, our name, Portokalos, is come from the Greek word "portokali," which mean "orange." So, okay? Here tonight, we have, ah, apple and orange. We all different, but in the end, we all fruit.

[repeated line]

[whenever anyone has an ailment]

Gus Portokalos: Put some Windex.

Gus Portokalos: Kimono, kimono, kimono. Ha! Of course! Kimono is come from the Greek word himona, is mean winter. So, what do you wear in the wintertime to stay warm? A robe. You see: robe, kimono. There you go!

Gus Portokalos: There are two kinds of people - Greeks, and everyone else who wish they was Greek.

Ian Miller: May I please date your daughter?

Gus Portokalos: NO!

Gus Portokalos: [crying] Why you want to leave me?

Toula Portokalos: I'm not leaving you! Don't you want me to do something with my life?

Gus Portokalos: Yes! Get married, make babies! You look so... old!

Maria Portokalos: [angry] What is wrong with Toula going to school downtown?

Gus Portokalos: Is drugs downtown!

Maria Portokalos: What are you saying? Are you saying Toula will get involved with drugs?

Gus Portokalos: No. But somebody will say to her: take this bag down to the bus depot, and she'll do it!

Maria Portokalos: She is not stupid! She's smart!

Gus Portokalos: I know she's smart. So what for she needs more school? She's smart enough for a girl.

Maria Portokalos: [indignated] Oh! You think you're smarter than me, huh?

Gus Portokalos: No, I... I mean... You... you know...

Maria Portokalos: [angry] What? What you mean? I run the restaurant, I cook, I clean, I wash for you *and* I raise three kids *and* I teach Sunday school, you know? It's lucky for me I have you to tie my shoes!

Gus Portokalos: Maria!

[Maria leaves the room, slamming the door, and smiles at Toula]

[first lines]

Gus Portokalos: [to Toula] You better get married soon. You're starting to look... old!

Gus Portokalos: [describing Ian Miller] A xeno with big, long, hair on top of his head!

[Toula is wearing a fancy dress for a secret date with Ian]

Gus Portokalos: Where are you going?

Toula Portokalos: I'm taking a pottery class.

Gus Portokalos: Ah! The Greeks invented pottery. Hmph.

[repeated line]

Gus Portokalos: Give me a word, any word, and I show you that the root of that word is Greek.

Gus Portokalos: Oh, Mrs. White! You find my mama *again*! You know, she come from Greece. The country I come from too...

Mrs. White: [interrupting] For Godsake, I know! Listen. Keep your mother off my lawn, out of my basement

[screaming]

Mrs. White: And away from my roof!

[last lines]

Paris Miller: Mom, I want to go to Brownies.

Toula Portokalos: I know. I know. But I promise you this. You can marry anybody you want.

Ian Miller: [to Toula] Ah, thanks, baby.

[to Paris]

Ian Miller: Greek school. Pame! What's that mean?

Paris Miller: Let's go.

Ian Miller: Let's go.

Toula Portokalos: That's pretty good.

Ian Miller: Looking good, Gus.

Toula Portokalos: Hi, dad.

Gus Portokalos: Where you going?

Toula Portokalos: Greek school.

Nick Portokalos: Hello ladies, fresh baklava!

[takes picture]

Nikki: [girls scream] Nick, give me the camera!

Nick Portokalos: Toula! Toula, help me, c'mon!

Nikki: No boys allowed!

Nick Portokalos: Oh, nice mustache, Nikki!

Nikki: Thank you!

Gus Portokalos: Niko, let's go, let's go.

Nick Portokalos: Dad, is that my tux?

Gus Portokalos: No, this one.

Toula Portokalos: Nick, go to the airport and pick up the band!

Nick Portokalos: Okay, okay.

Gus Portokalos: Hey, what is that thing?

Aunt Lexy: It's a mosquito bite.

Cousin Jennie: [runs, bumps into Nick] I've got the coverup!

Nick Portokalos: [as the girls girls cheer and leave ] You're all nuts!

Gus Portokalos: Anyways, I tell her I will send her to Greece to find somebody.

Uncle Taki: She not too old. In Greece you don't tell anybody how old she is!

Aunt Voula: Ah, there you go!

Gus Portokalos: She don't want to go!

Uncle Taki, Aunt Voula: [Shocked] She don't want to go?

Gus Portokalos: No! It's like, it's like she don't want to get married!

[He crosses himself]

Uncle Taki, Aunt Voula: [Crossing themselves] No, No, No!

Gus Portokalos: Look who's back, everyone!

Maria Portokalos: [Gus is brooding in the family room and Maria has turned on all the lights] ENOUGH! ENOUGH!

[He gets up to leave]

Maria Portokalos: Don't you walk away from me! Sit down! Sit down!

[He sits on the couch]

Maria Portokalos: It's done! They fell in love!

Gus Portokalos: How could she do this to me?

Gus Portokalos: It is YOUR LUCKY DAY... to be baptized into the Greek Orthodox Church!