Gordy Quotes in Open Season (2006)

Gordy: You know, the longer you wait, the harder it's gonna to be for him to adapt.

Beth: Oh, I'm sure he'll... that is, I think he'll...

Gordy: And the harder it's gonna be for you to leave him.

Gordy: Shaw, open season isn't for three days. What is that buck doing on your hood?

Shaw: It ain't my fault. I hit him while driving.

Gordy: Where, on the interstate?

[flashback to Shaw veering off the interstate and hitting Elliot]

Shaw: [chuckling] Sorta.

Gordy: You're not his mother.

Beth: I'm not mothering him.

[Boog taps on window]

Beth: Excuse me a moment. Go to bed, Boog!

Fishman: Sir, would it be ok if we called you Spider?

Max: Why the h - - would you wanna call me that?

Gordy: Because it's your nick name.

Max: Well fine then. Call me Spider!

Fishman: Spider. Spider. Spider!

Max: WHAT?

Fishman: How come your nick name's Spider?

Max: Because I once killed a kid who called me Spider, one time too many!

Fishman: Yeah, but how could he call you Spider one time too many if your nick name wasn't already Spider?

Max: Watcha making?

Gordy: It's a crystal-dialed receiver. You know what that is, right?

Max: Yeah, of course I do. That is a beauty.

Gordy: That's the toolbox.

[scouts singing]

Max: Alright! Knock it off! What is that? We run and dance and sing and play?

Gordy: My mom kinda wrote the words.

Max: Well they suck! Okay?

[little kid rides up on a tricycle]

Kid: Can I play too?

Scouts: AAAAHHHH!

Barnhill: Little kid, go home.

Gordy: We're not playing, we're practicing.

Kid: You guys are silly.

[Gordy's hanging from a ledge]

Max: Hey kid, how's it hanging? Alright, Gordy, I'm coming down to get you.

Gordy: No! You don't know what you're doing!

Max: Of course I do! I'm the Lizard! Remember?

Gordy: You mean the Spider?

Max: Right.

Gordy: My mom says the guy who's taking us has hiked all over the world.

Barnhill: I'm sure he won't be half as good as the guy me and my dad had on our trip to the Serengeti.

Ralph: Barnhill, if you're dad is so friggin' cool, then why isn't he our scout leader?

Barnhill: Oh yeah. Spies have a lot of time for the scouts.

Ralph: We finally get to go on an overnight, and we end up at Grand Central Station.

Gordy: It's better than my backyard.

Ralph: Not by much.

Gordy: He didn't know the difference in a beehive and a pine cone?

Kelsey: What're you getting at?

Gordy: I don't know.

Kelsey: Oh my God, we're trapped with a murderer!

Gordy: A psycho murderer!

Fishman: I don't think they cover that in here

[the scout manual]

Fishman: .

Gray: [standing outside a gay bar] I can't do this.

Gordy: Yes, you can.

Gray: Why do I have to do this?

Gordy: Because you're gay and you have to start behaving like it.

Gordy: I happen to think you're pretty dandy.

Gray: What can I say? I am a mess.

Gordy: You don't look a mess. You look cute as a button. And buttons aren't messy.

Gray: Well, looks can be deceiving.

Brinks: Your empire, sir. Would you like me to read off the list?

Hanky Royce: Yes, please, Mr. Brinks.

Brinks: [he reads off the list] Hero pig Breakfast food division. Sweet pops, Sugar tarts, Fudgy flakes.

Gordy: Hey, Hanky. Why don't we make natural foods? They're better bound for people's health.

Hanky Royce: He says change it to natural foods.

Brinks: He says?

Hanky Royce: The boss says he wants fresh foods. Wheat, oats and fruit. Get rid of all the chemicals and artificial junk.

[Brinks takes notes]

Brinks: Yes, sir.

Hanky Royce: What else is he in charge of?

Brinks: Hero Pig snack factories. Sofa Potato chips, Creamy dream cookies.

Gordy: Seem junk. Can't we change to something more wholesome?

Hanky Royce: The boss says he wants fresh foods like a real fruit drink and natural vitamins.

Brinks: This calls for a massive organization. I'll get a copy to Mr. Sipes, he'll get on it right away.

Jinnie Sue McAllister: Well, hey there, sleepy face. What are you doing under there? You must've fallen off the hog truck. So... I'm gonna take care of you.

Gordy: I'm trying to find my mamma.

Jinnie Sue McAllister: That's funny. I could've sworn I heard you say mamma.

Gordy: People can understand animals if you take the time to listen. My name is Gordy.

Jinnie Sue McAllister: [chuckles] Come on.

[She picks Gordy up and carries him in her arms]

Jinnie Sue McAllister: Now, what am I gonna call you? I know. Pinky!

Cousin Jake: Well, you sure have come up for the world, Mr. Hero Pig. We've been seeing your smilin' face all over the map.

Luke MacAllister: What are you doing out here all alone?

Hanky Royce: We're heading north looking for Gordy's folks.

Gordy: Hanky's grandpa says you should always do what's right.

Cousin Jake: That's right, Hanky. Always mind your grandpa.

Hanky Royce: Hey, Cousin Jake, you understand piggy talk.

Cousin Jake: I kinda guess at what he's oinking.

Gordy: It's hard to tell if Cousin Jake's pure in heart or simple minded.

Hanky Royce: We've been waiting to ask you a favor, Grandpa. It's about his family. They're lost and he's worried sick. And he wants desperately to go look for them.

Father Pig: [flashback] I love you, Gordy!

Henry Royce: Gordy wants to go? Well, he can't. He's becoming a nation institution. People have taken Gordy into their hearts.

Gordy: Tell him I only wanted to do what's right.

Hanky Royce: He doesn't want to let anyone down, Grandpa. He only wants to do what's right.

Henry Royce: So it's all settled. Say no more about it.

Hanky Royce: They're still following us.

Gordy: Then we have to get out of here!

Hanky Royce: They'll grab us as soon as we get off. I don't know about you, but I'm getting kind of... scared.

Gordy: Don't worry, Hanky. We'll find a way.

[last lines]

Cousin Jake: Meadowbrook farm. I guess we'll be saying goodbye.

Hanky Royce: Do we have to go, mom? Now that we've given Gordy his farm, he's inviting us to stay. Can't we, mom? Please?

Gordy: Please stay. There's nothing better than a happy family. Come on, say yes.

Luke MacAllister: If you say yes, I'll sure say yes.

Jessica Royce: Yes.

[Luke and Jessica kiss]

Hanky Royce: You deserve a reward, Gordy. If you can have anything in the world, what would you wish for?

Gordy: [Gordy was thinking about what Father pig told him] To find my family.

Hanky Royce: Where are they?

Gordy: They went somewhere pigs don't come back from. It's call up north.

Hanky Royce: Up north?

Gordy: What's that thing?

Hanky Royce: It's a map of the world?

Gordy: World? It looks more like a pumpkin.

Hanky Royce: Here's the United States of America.

[points at United States]

Hanky Royce: And here's where we are.

[points at where they're at]

Gordy: Pretty colors. Can you see where my folks are?

Hanky Royce: Don't worry, Gordy. We'll find them. We have a big day tomorrow.

Hanky Royce: But we're not running away when your family's in danger. You've got no choice. Besides, as soon as we find them, we can come back.

Gordy: But finding my folks is my problem, Hanky. Are you sure you wanna come with me?

Hanky Royce: What are friends for.

Hanky Royce: Gordy. Where are you, Gordy? Gordy.

[finds Gordy hiding in the costumes]

Hanky Royce: There you are.

Gordy: You know that thing in front of the camera? Mr. Sipes made him change it.

Hanky Royce: Change the lens? Why?

Gordy: I don't know, Hanky. But I think something funny is gonna happen.

Hanky Royce: Maybe we better change it back. Come on.

Hanky Royce: [after many successes] Grandpa would be proud of you, Gordy.

Gordy: Thanks, Hanky. But I really think it's time for me to get going and find my family. They could be in trouble.

Hanky Royce: You're right. Time's running out.

Gordy: This is your fate, you got to play this out to the end. Otherwise, you're going to walk around a ghost for the rest of your life.

Brett Hanson: [about May] She wasn't afraid - of me, maybe anything.

Gordy: Shit, everyone's afraid of me. I never hurt a flea.

Martine: I'm not afraid of you, I get annoyed.

Gordy: I think it would go away, because it wouldn't be like this obsession thing...

Martine: So it's like an obsession thing. You touch me and it goes away? Why is that?

Gordy: The mystery's gone.

[Brett puts a letter in the mailbox]

Gordy: Now that's a sort of thing an ex murderer does. He mails a ransom note in the pouring rain.

Martine: I like him.