Glen Quotes in Transformers (2007)


Glen Quotes:

  • Sam Witwicky: So...

    Maggie Madsen: What'd they get you for?

    Sam Witwicky: I bought a car. Turned out to be an alien robot.

    Glen: [whispered] Wow.

    Sam Witwicky: Who knew?

  • Glen: So I downloaded a couple thousand songs off the internet! Who hasn't? Who hasn't?

  • GlenGlen's Cousin: [on the computer] It's the Maaaatrix!

  • Terry: [Deleted scene/Unrated Version scene]

    [covers the corpses on the floor]

    Terry: Somebody should say something.

    Ana: Yeah.

    Michael: Glen?

    Glen: No.

    Ana: You worked in a church.

    Glen: I played the organ.

    CJ: Come on, man. You must've heard the priest say something about life and death.

    Glen: It was a job. I don't believe in God. I don't see how anyone could.

  • Glen: [sees Robbie washing his car] Good morning.

    Robbie: Morning.

    Glen: Did Aunt Cindy ask you to do this?

    Robbie: No.

    Glen: You know, you can wash on, wash off all you want. But you're not driving any of our cars.

    Robbie: I know. No wax, right?

  • Glen: The ones with the flower have been scattered this hour.

  • Glen: Any word on the plant being bought by any new owners yet?

  • Glen: I am Wonder Woman.

  • Glen: It's the light, Thom, that's what lasts. The leaves are transient. They grow, turn green, turn red and die, but behind them the light lasts forever.

    Maryanne Kinkade: Glen, please, come sit down.

    Glen: [to Thom] Paint the light.

  • Thomas Kinkade: "Ultimum Folium?"

    Glen: Latin. Good old Latin. "The Last Leaf" is my last painting, Thom.

    Thomas Kinkade: Ah... no. Glen, no.

    Glen: I have been trying to paint my sorrow, to show the bleakness of a world without Nicole, but then you came with a candle last night, and I knew what Nicole's memorial should be. Not darkness, but light. Sometimes we can barely see beyond the forest to the sky. I was painting the leaves of the forest and never saw the light of the sky behind it. Now I see it. That's all I need to see now.

  • Glen: Thank you.

    Maryanne Kinkade: What for?

    Glen: You managed to put Humpty Dumpty back together again.

  • Bartleby Gaines: What the hell happened?

    Glen: An explosion of flavor. I'm working with some very unstable herbs.

  • Glen: Oh look there's my old girlfriend Sarah Pellfan... YOU BROKE MY HEART!

  • Bartleby Gaines: And they all paid first semester's tuition?

    Rory: Yep. 10,000 bucks apiece. I stopped counting after the first 100 checks.

    Glen: That's 74 million dollars.

    Rory: It's a million dollars, Glen.

    Glen: Yeah... In human dollars.

  • Glen: [holding a rambutan in his hand] WHAT ARE YOU?

  • Hands: [while Bartleby is on the phone, Glen is on a ladder] Hey Glen! Catch!

    Glen: [Jumps off of ladder into bush] Mother of hell!

  • Bartleby Gaines: Glen since when have you been working at the kwik and stop?

    Glen: since I got boned HARD by every college I applied to

    Bartleby Gaines: why what happened?

    Glen: some political crap I got a zero on my SAT's.

    Sherman Schrader: you do know you get 600 points just for signing your name right?

    Glen: DAMNIT!

  • Bartleby Gaines: Why'd you get fired?

    Glen: I got fired for making a shrimp slushy.

    Bartleby Gaines: That's disgusting! Why would you do that pal?

    Glen: 'Cause I was hungry and thirsty!

  • Glen: [ordering around in the kitchen] I got 85 pork tenderloins with balsamic vinegar demiglaze. Ka-blam! Eddie, we gotta pack these paninis for Rory's nature walk. Pronto! And someone get a rabbi down here to bless this chicken. Tomorrow we're gonna go kosher.

  • Glen: [seeing the cobweb infested kitchen for the first time] This kitchen is bitchin.

  • Uncle Ben: Right or Left?

    Glen: Right

    Uncle Ben: Whose right?

    Glen: Your call

    Uncle Ben: You're an idiot!

    Glen: You're upset, go with what you feel. You got about twelve feet.

    [Trailer hits a tree]

    Glen: Perfect

    Uncle Ben: Asshole.

  • Glen: Holy Balls

  • Hoyt Ambrose: You want me to give you something funny to laugh about?

    Bartleby Gaines: You mean funnier than your future alcohol abuse?


  • Glen: Keep your voices down, people are playing.

  • Glen: How many Polacks it take to screw up a lightbulb?

    H.I.: I don't know, Glen. One?

    Glen: Nope, it takes three.

    [Glen laughs. H.I. doesn't]

    Glen: Wait a minute, I told it wrong. Here, I'm startin' over: How come it takes three Polacks to screw up a lightbulb?

    H.I.: I don't know, Glen.

    Glen: 'Cause they're so darn stupid!

    [Glen laughs again. H.I. doesn't]

    Glen: Shit, man, loosen up! Don't ya get it?

    H.I.: No, Glen, I sure don't.

    Glen: Shit, man, think about it! I guess it's what they call a "way homer."

    H.I.: Why's that?

    Glen: 'Cause you only get it on the way home.

    H.I.: I'm already home, Glen.

  • H.I.: Do you ever get the feeling that there's something... Powerful pressing down on you?

    Glen: Yes, I know that feeling. I told Dot to lose some weight but she don't wanna listen.

  • Glen: Say, did you hear about the person of the Polish persuasion who walked into a bar with a big 'ol pile of shit in his hands and he says, "Look what I almost stepped in"?

  • Glen: Say that reminds me, how'd you get that kid so darn fast? Me and Dot went in to adopt on account a' somethin' went wrong with my semen, and they said we had to wait five years for a healthy white baby. I said, "Healthy white baby? Five years? What else you got?" Said they got two Koreans and a negra born with his heart on the outside. It's a crazy world.

    H.I.: Someone oughta sell tickets.

    Glen: Sure, I'd buy one.

  • H.I.: What are you talkin' about, Glen?

    Glen: What am I talkin' about? I'm talkin' about sex, boy, what the hell you talkin' about? I'm talkin' about l'amour! I'm talkin' that me and Dot are swingers, as in "to swing." I'm talkin' about wife swappin'. I'm talkin' about what they call nowadays open marriage. I'm talk...

    H.I.: [Knocks Glen to the ground with a punch] Keep your goddamn hands off my wife!

  • Dot: Where's that baby? Where's he at?

    Glen: [Glen smacks Dot on the butt] Go find him, honey!

    Dot: [Dot smacks Glen with her purse] Cut it out, Glen!

    H.I.: [quietly] He's asleep right now.

    Glen: [rubbing his jaw] Shit! I hope we didn't wake it!

    Dot: Can I just sneak a peek-a-loo?

  • Glen: Mind you don't cut yourself, Mordecai.

  • H.I.: Need a beer, Glen?

    Glen: Does the Pope wear a funny hat?

  • Glen: That Buford's a sly one. Already knows his ABC's. Hit the deck, boy!

  • Glen: Say, that 'minds me. What are going to name him?

    H.I.: Uh... Ed. Ed, Jr.

    Glen: But I thought you said it was a boy?

    H.I.: As in "Edward." We just like that name!

  • Glen: Why do you kill?

    Chucky: Umm... hobby, I guess.

  • Glen: [thinks he's Japanese because of his "Made in Japan" label] Konnichiwa, okaasan. Otousan.

  • Tiffany: She's so wonderful!

    Chucky: ...You mean HE's so wonderful.

    [they both look at Glen]

    Glen: Don't look at ME.

    [they remove off his pants, revealing ambiguous genitalia]

    Tiffany: ...Um, see? She's a beautiful girl.

    Chucky: W-what are you talking about? That's, uh... my boy.

  • Glen: Everything's always about what YOU two want! What about what I want?

    Chucky: Um... that's new.

    Tiffany: Ok, sweetie? What do YOU want to be?

    Glen: Well... I think... I want to be a boy.

    Chucky: [to Tiffany] Ha! In your face!

    Glen: But... being a girl would be nice too. Sometime I feel like a boy... and sometimes I feel like a girl... Hey! Can't I be both?

  • Chucky: Tiff?

    [taps her on back]

    Chucky: [GLENDA turns around revealing that he/she is wearing makeup, GLENDA laughs manically]

    Chucky: Gah! Glen...?

    Glen: [singsong voice] Guess again, daddy...

    Chucky: Glenda?

    Glen: That's my name, don't you wear it out.

    [examines nails]

    Glen: Oh... shit.

    Tiffany: [drops glass on floor, shattering it] What did I miss?

    Glen: Oh, nothing much... I just *fired* Joan.

    [laughs maniacally]

    Chucky: Looks like you won after all, Tiff. Congratulations.

    Glen: Oh, you *both* win. I'm a real... ladykiller, if you catch my drift. I'm a bonafide bonus baby!

    [laughs maniacally]

    Tiffany: Jesus Christ, Chucky. What did you do to him?

    Chucky: What did I do? Atleast I spend time with the kid.

    Tiffany: [talking to Glenda] Glen? Wake up.

    Glen: Stop it, mommy. You'll wrinkle my dress. Oh, and how do you like it? I made it meself. Like mother, like daughter right?

    [laughs maniacally]

    Glen: Like mother, like daughter! Get it? Mother and daughter, mother and daughter!


    Tiffany: I said wake up! Right now!

    [slaps Glenda]

    Glen: [wakes up] Mom? Dad?

    [turns to mirror, gasps]

    Glen: What am I?


  • Tiffany: What's your name?

    Glen: Shitface.

    Chucky: [snort]

  • Tiffany: I want a girl!

    Chucky: I want a boy!

    Glen: You're tearing me apart! What about what I want?

    Chucky: ...what?

    Tiffany: What?

    Glen: Doesn't what I want mean anything at all?

    Tiffany: Oh.

    Chucky: OK. Interesting. Tell us.

    Tiffany: What do you want, sweetface?

    Glen: I think... I want to be a boy.


    Glen: But... being a girl would be nice, too.

    Tiffany: Hmph.

    Chucky: Whoa... which is it?

    Glen: I'm not sure. Sometimes I feel like a boy. Sometimes I feel like a girl. Gasp! Can I be both?

    Tiffany: Well, some people...

    Chucky: EH-EH! NO WAY!

  • Glen: But, isn't violence bad?

    Chucky: No, son. "Violins." Violins are bad. That screeching music is gonna ruin the goddamn country.

  • Chucky: [gets whacked with ax in chest by Glen] Glenda?

    Glen: No, Dad. It's me. Your *boy*! Your chip off the old block!

    Glen: [chops off Chucky's left arm]

    Glen: You proud of me *now*, Daddy?

    Glen: [chops off other arm]

    Glen: [shouts] Are you?

  • [Britney swerves past Chucky]

    Chucky: SONOFABITCH!

    [Chucky honks at Britney, who flips the bird at him]

    Chucky: [flips back] Up yours, asshole!

    Glen: What?

    Chucky: [calmly] Not you, son. Come on, floor it!

  • Claudia: [sees Glen] You killed my mummy and daddy.

    [Glen urinates himself in fear]

    Claudia: And now... You're pissing your pants! You're pissing your pants! YOU'RE PISSING YOUR PANTS!

    Glen: [wakes up from a nightmare] AAAAAHHHH!

    Psychs: Wake up, you're pissing your pants!

  • Glen: But violence is bad. It said so on TV.

    Chucky: Not violence... Vio-lins! Violins are bad.

  • Glen: I don't know much about myself. I know I'm an orphan. I know I'm a freak. And, of course, I know that I'm Japanese.

  • Puppeteer: This little shitface isn't even anatomically correct!

    Glen: It's a condition!

    Puppeteer: I found shitface here in a graveyard in America, where he nearly ripped my throat apart!

    Glen: I was trying to give him a hug!

  • Chucky: [after Glen attacks him with an ax, amazed] Glenda?

    Glen: [furiously] No, Dad, it's me, your boy - your chip off the old block!

    [Glen hacks off Chucky's left arm making Chucky scream in pain]


    [Glen then hacks off Chucky's right arm making Chucky scream more, Glen then hacks off both of Chucky's legs making Chucky scream harder]

    Chucky: [weakly] Attaboy, kid! Attaboy...

    [Glen then decapitates Chucky killing him instantly, Glen goes petrified, drops the ax and breaks down crying]

    Jennifer Tilly: [comforts him] There, there. It's all right. It's going to be all right.

  • Kirk: That is, without doubt, the sluttiest girl I have ever seen.

    Glen: You have to do her, and while you're doing her, think of me. Okay that sounded gay.

  • Glen: I think the question is how would Gil get jiggy with this Courtney chick and make her say, "Who's your daddy?"

    [Nora hits him]

    Glen: While *respecting* her as a woman.

  • Glen: I imagine God having an ass like that. Did that sound gay?

  • Nora: He's got kind of a... Brad Pitt thing going there.

    Glen: I saw a little... Anne Heche there too. Does *that* sound gay?

  • Glen: The Crowd... they're animals!

  • Glen: Next time we should go Danish - split it 60/60.

    Lynn Sheridan: You mean 50/50.

    Glen: What, you don't believe in tipping?

  • Glen: People tell us all the time what we wont ever do. Won't ever read, won't ever have a job, won't ever learn to tie my own shoes, won't ever have a girlfriend. Well I have done all those things.

    Mark: But you can't tie your own shoes.

    Winston: And you never had a girlfwiend.

    Glen: That's right

  • Glen: I work at Burger King.

    Glen: You want fries with that.

  • Glen: Hey! Guess how many fingers i have.

    Steve Barker: Uhh, 10?

    Glen: No. I have 8 fingers and 2 thumbs! Ha Ha Ha!

  • Glen: Hi I'm Glen

    Glen: Guess how many fingers I have?

    Gary: ten

    Glen: no I have eight and two thumbs

  • Steve Barker: What's in that?

    Glen: Milk, eggs, and meat.

    Steve Barker: What kind of meat?

    Glen: Raw meat!

  • Glen: There is something wrong with your cow. I reach under there and I'm pulling, tugging, tugging, pulling, nothing, not a drop.

    Mitch: The cow's name is Norman. You were pulling on his dick.

    Glen: I'm gonna go wash up.

  • Phil: Hey, Glen, let me ask you something. Who had Frankie Pentangeli killed?

    Mitch: Phil!

    [Barbara groans and leaves the room]

    Glen: The Rosato brothers.

    Phil: Who gave the order?

    Mitch: [Hits Phil over the head with a pillow] You stupid dope!

    Phil: [laughing] I love this.

    Glen: There was this kid I grew up with. He was younger than me. Sort of looked up to me, you know.

    Mitch: Glen...

    Glen: We did our first work together, worked our way out of the street. Things were good, we made the most of it.

    Mitch: I'm going to change.

    [as he leaves, he shows Phil the middle finger from behind Glen]

    Glen: During Prohibition, we ran molasses to Canada. Made a fortune.

    Mitch: [Discreetly] "Ran molasses to Canada." You should run some brains to your head.

  • Mitch: You ever walk in on our parents doing it?

    Glen: No, have you?

    Mitch: Yeah.

    Glen: That's a horrible thing for a little kid to see.

    Mitch: This was last week in Florida!

    Glen: Uhh!

    Mitch: It was on the kitchen table.

    Glen: Uhhh!

    Mitch: And an hour later we *ate* on that table!

  • Glen: Phil, when was the last time you were with a woman?

    Phil: Uh, Saturday... Saturday will be a year.

    Glen: Ow!

    Mitch: Gee, if I had known, I'd have gotten you a cake.

  • Mitch: [after hearing his brother has arrived] Well how is he?

    Barbara Robbins: Well, he came in, asked me to make him a sandwich, no crusts, then started making long-distance calls. Of course, first, he did three scenes from "Godfather II".

    Phil: He still does that? I love that!

    Mitch: Phil, I'm warning you. If you mention "The Godfather" to him, I will rip your arms out of their sockets and beat you to death with them. This started out as such a good birthday!

    Phil: What's Glen been up to?

    Mitch: He's been up to nothing, he's the Vice President of Lazy. He goes from one family to another until they throw him out, he borrows money..."borrows"? That indicates an intent to repay. He gets jobs that aren't jobs. We only hear from him for change of address calls. I mean he's lost. He's a lost soul, he's a dented can, he's... behind me, isn't he?

    [Indeed, Glen is standing right behind Mitch, having heard every word. Phil nods]

    Glen: Mitchy, buenos dias!

    Mitch: [Shaking his hand] Hello, Glen. How was your sandwich?

    Glen: Ah, delightful!

    Mitch: Listen, I'm sorry about what I said...

    Glen: Ah, water off a duck's back. Come here.

    [Hugs him and briefly lifts him off his feet]

    Glen: Wow, look at you. You're still the world's smallest big brother.

  • Mitch: [while discussing Phil's troubled love life, Mitch is reminded of something] Speaking of which, did you ever walk in on our parents doing it?

    Glen: No.


    Glen: Why, did you?

    Mitch: Yes.

    [Glen stops the cart]

    Glen: Really?

    Mitch: Worst thing I've ever seen.

    Glen: Well, that's a horrible thing for a little kid to see.

    Mitch: This was three weeks ago in Florida!

    Glen: AUGH! Did you walk into the bedroom?

    Mitch: This was in the kitchen.

    Glen: *AUGH!*

    Mitch: Apparently it was spontaneous, too, because Pop still had his hat on. You know that one with the fake grass and a golf ball on it? It was horrible. Wax fruit flying everyplace, the dog barking, my kids' pictures flapping up and down on the refrigerator...

    Glen: [ready to vomit] Okay, stop it.

    Mitch: [continuing] Pop was working hard.

    [as his father]

    Mitch: "Ohh, ohh, ohh, ohh... ahh, enough of that. Did you take the car in?"

    [Glen groans in disgust]

    Phil: See, I think that's beautiful.

    Mitch: Beautiful? Not from my angle.

    Phil: No, two people in love after all those years? That's great!

    Mitch: Great? An hour later, we *ATE* on that table.

    Phil: [disgusted] EEEUWWW.

  • Glen: All right, now the sun sets in the East, right?

    Mitch: No! The sun sets in the West.

    Glen: That's if your *in* the East, but we are way out West now, so we are past where the sun sets.

    Mitch: You can't be *passed* where the sun sets, and if you think you can, then I am directly South of an idiot!

    Phil: Which is down!

    Mitch: Right!

  • Bert: I'm gonna call it off.

    Glen: I think you'd better.

    Fritzi: Wait!

    Bert: Fritzi, what in the hell are you doing here?

    Fritzi: Well I... I knew you'd be discussing stopping the show and I just thought how disappointed all the kids would be after...

    Bert: You scheming little bitch!

    Fritzi: Oh please! I'm a child.

    Bert: If you think for one...

    Fritzi: Oh save the speech, rummy. She's fucked, I'm ready, and the goddamn show must go on. So let's get cracking, shall we?

  • Glen: She's going to get everything. That's the way these old guys are. Tough as nails, biggest son of a bitch in the world, she touches his shriveled-up little noodle, and his brains turn to frozen yogurt. She'll marry him, screw him six feet into the ground and then get everything!

  • Daniel McTeague: I had no idea just how sick you guys were.

    Frank: Come spend a day with us.

    Daniel McTeague: I'd rather shove this club up my ass.

    Glen: I'll do it for you.

  • Glen: We were all decent people before Uncle Joe sunk his hooks into us. Except for Frank. He was always a son of a bitch.

  • Frank: Oh, my God, I feel so horrible, I could cut out my tongue.

    Glen: Here's a knife.

  • Carl: Do we know if they're sleeping together.Is there proof?

    Laura: I need more time.

    Glen: They're humping too quick to get pictures.Let's get a better detective!

  • Frank: Look at these pictures she got of Glen and that gym instructor.

    Glen: [grabs photographs] That's not me.

    Frank: Well it looks like you and that's all that matters.

  • Tracy: You know, I never went to Europe. Never. Not once. I never even went to Montreal, which I hear is very European. I never went scuba diving. I never went to the ballet. I've never been in love. I've never even watched The Wire.

    Glen: All of those things are overrated. Except for The Wire. That's really good. Last season's not very good, but...

  • Glen: Do you ever think about finding your parents?

    Russell: No, not really.

    Glen: Why not?

    Russell: I don't really see the point. You know, I don't think it would change anything.

    Glen: Why don't I pretend to be your dad and you can come out to me?

    Russell: [laughs] That is SO weird.

    Glen: Just ignore the fact we just had sex.

    Russell: I don't think I can. Guess I'll try. Ok.

    [looks Glen in the eye]

    Russell: Dad? I got something I need to tell you.

    Glen: [pretending to be Russell's dad] What's that?

    Russell: I'm gay.

    Glen: [pretends to think] Hmm.

    Russell: I like guys, not girls.

    Glen: [breathes out slowly] Well. You know what, son. It doesn't matter to me. I love you just the same. And guess what?

    Russell: What?

    Glen: I couldn't be more proud of you than if you were the first man on the moon.

  • Glen: Well, you know what it's like when you first sleep with someone you don't know?

    Russell: Yes.

    Glen: It's... you, like, become this blank canvas and it gives you an opportunity to project onto that canvas who you want to be. That's what's interesting because everybody does that.

    Russell: So do you think that I did it?

    Glen: Course you did. Well, what happens is while you're projecting who you want to be... this gap opens up between who you want to be and who you really are. And in that gap, it shows you what's stopping you becoming who you want to be.

  • Russell: I moved around in foster homes until I was about sixteen.

    Glen: [softly] Mm-hm. Fuck.

    Russell: Met my best mate there, Jamie, when we were twelve. Erm yeah, it was nice, we just went around as a pair.

    Glen: Fucking hell. What was it like?

    Russell: What?

    Glen: Being "in care".

    Russell: It was fine. I mean, I wasn't abused or anything.

    Glen: Shame, you should've got a refund. Do they know about you?

    Russell: Who?

    Glen: Jamie?

    Russell: Yeah. I'm like his brother really. Everyone knows about me of my friends. Close ones, anyway.

    Glen: [Glen starts snickering, bit ashamed]

    Russell: What? What?

    Glen: [snickers] Is it really wrong that I find the whole orphan thing pretty sexy?

    [laughs out loud]

    Russell: [smilingly] O my god. What's wrong with you?

  • Glen: It's like when you've had the same friends for too long, they become like - Everything becomes cemented.

    Russell: What? And that's a bad thing, is it?

    Glen: Of course, it's a bad thing. I don't want to be in fucking concrete, thank you very much.

    Glen: It's like they won't let you, they won't let you be any version of yourself except an old version, or the version that they want you to be.

  • Glen: You're a terrible liar for a faggot.

  • Glen: Look. Straight people like us as long as we conform, we behave by their little rules. Imagine your friends if you suddenly started getting all, but really, political about being a fag, or you got suddenly, like, camp and swishy or talked about rimming all the time.

    Russell: [interrupting] But that's not what I'm like, is it? That's not who I am.

    Glen: Well, just trust me: They like it as long as we don't shove it down their throats.

    Russell: Okay, well, why should I just shove it down their throats?

    Glen: Because they shove it down our throats all the time: Being straight. Straight story lines on television, everywhere - in books, on billboards, magazines, everywhere. But, ah, the gays, the gays -


    Glen: "We mustn't upset the straights. Shh. Watch out. Straights are coming.


    Glen: Let's not upset them. Let's hide in our little ghettoes. Let's not hold hands. Let's not kiss in the street, no."

  • [Glen moves in to kiss Russell, then stops short]

    Russell: [covering his mouth] What? Do I have morning breath?

    Glen: Quite the contrary. You brushed your teeth.

    Russell: No.

    Glen: I can smell toothpaste.

    Russell: So?

    Glen: Now you've broken the rule. Now you smell all minty fresh, and I smell like cock and bum.

  • Glen: We have the chance to make up our own shit! We can grow our own garden, and put little flowers and pansies and gay gnomes in it, and water features and water sports and slings. But, no. Everybody wants to concrete the fucker over and get a gas barbecue.

    Russell: You're obsessed with concrete. You're absolutely obsessed with it.

    Glen: [laughing] But why would you want *concrete* when you can have whatever you want?

  • Russell: I can see it that you think... you think I'm a fucking idiot, because I want a fucking relationship.

    Glen: Did I say that?

    Russell: But the thing is Glen, the thing is Glen, I think that you want one too.

  • Glen: [angrily] I swear to God if you don't quit, I'm going to come down there and fuckin' rape your holes, do you hear me?

  • Glen: The problem is that no one's gonna come and see it, because it's about gay sex. So the gays'll only come because they want a glimpse of a cock, and they'll be disappointed. The straights won't come because, well, it's got nothing to do with their world. They'll go and see pictures of refugees or murder or rape. But gay sex? Fuck off.

    Russell: [laughs] Fuck it. Doesn't matter, does it? I'd come.

    Glen: No you wouldn't.


    Russell: Yeah I would.


    Russell: Okay, maybe I wouldn't.

    [both laughing]

    Russell: Maybe I wouldn't come.

  • Glen: [Glen winking at Russell] What?

    Russell: [Russell staring at Glen] Nothing.

    Glen: You look like you want to kiss me.

    Russell: I do.

    Glen: Go on then.

    Russell: Not here, I can't.

  • Glen: I know what artists sound like when they talk about their art, so I am not going to sit around and sound like a cunt.

    Russell: Well, it's a good thing you are not an artist yet, then, isn't it?

    Glen: Ohh, verrry funny!

  • James Moore: All right, look, dad, I'm sorry I didn't become what you or everybody else had in mind for me.

    Glen: Oh, you think that's what's eating me, do ya?

    James Moore: Isn't it?

    Glen: What you do do with your life is your business. We all make our own choices.

    James Moore: Okay, fine. Yeah, great. I buy that. Why are you so angry with me?

    Glen: Who said I was angry? I'm not angry.

    James Moore: Okay. Disappointed.

    Glen: For no reason ever explained to me, you run away from here, and me, and everything that God had planned for you. Now and then you come bouncing back, most likely when you're running away from something else. And this time you need answers because the road you've been on is so filled with U-turns, you don't know which way it runs.

    James Moore: All right. Look, dad, first of all; I became a minister. I didn't run away from you or anybody else. I had a calling. And it wasn't as sudden as you make it out to be. And you know that.

    Glen: Fine.

    James Moore: And I didn't come here looking for answers. Or your sympathy.

    Glen: Son, every seed you've planted, everything you've ever put in the ground, including your mother, hasn't yielded a single thing. And that's not my fault, it's not your mother's fault, and it's certainly isn't God's fault. My question for you is simple: do you ever plan on finishing anything?

  • James Moore: You know, I don't go sticking my nose in anyone's manure. But if you're asking, if it feels like a square peg is being forced into a round hole, well...

    Glen: What, you're saying you don't think he did it?

    James Moore: I didn't say that. I said I don't get involved in stuff like this. But I will tell you this however; there's a seed of truth in every lie. What that seed is, what becomes of it, that's all up to the guy that's pulling the plough.

  • Glen: My mind is in a muddle. Like... thick fog. I can't make sense to myself sometimes.

  • Terrence 'Terry' Chandler: May the old devils depart! May they burn in the fires of their own damnation! May they freeze in the infinite golden darkness of their own hideous creation!

    Glen: Isn't that kind of insulting?

    Terrence 'Terry' Chandler: I guess it's supposed to be. I mean, we're trying to get rid of them.

  • Terrence 'Terry' Chandler: We accidently summoned demons who used to rule the universe to come and take over the world.

    Glen: Yeah, we found out about it from, uh, one of Terry's albums.

  • Glen: Well... ever since I burnt a hole in the roof my dad says I can't launch any of my rockets without supervision.

    Terrence 'Terry' Chandler: Hey... I'll supervise.

  • Al: What the hell was that?

    Glen: It's the Workman... it got Terry! He just made it up but it got him! It took him into the wall!

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