Gladys Leeman Quotes in Drop Dead Gorgeous (1999)


Gladys Leeman Quotes:

  • Voice of Documentarian: [Gladys has just thought of a theme for the pageant: Proud to be an American] So what was the theme of the pageant last year?

    Gladys Leeman: Oh, that was "Buy American"

    Voice of Documentarian: And the year before that was...?

    Gladys Leeman: "USA is A-OK!"

    Voice of Documentarian: And can you remember the theme of your favorite pageant?

    Gladys Leeman: Can I? "Amer-I-Can!" People ask me where I get this, I don't know, it's... maybe a gift from God or somethin'.

  • Gladys Leeman: [wearing her old pageant outfit] And can you believe it, they still fit!

    Loretta: She had a big ass then, she's got a big ass now.

  • Gladys Leeman: Oh, my baby... Oh my God, the swan ate my baby!

  • Gladys Leeman: American Teen Princesses do not cross their legs like streetwalkers.

    [to Leslie Miller]

    Gladys Leeman: Excuse me, Miss Penthouse '98, put your kness together. I could drive a boat show in there.

  • Gladys Leeman: [looking for a parking space] You'd think they'd have the parking lot of America to go with the Mall of America.

    [Gladys parks in a handicapped parking space]

    Iris Clark: That's a $200 fine!

    Gladys Leeman: I told ya I would move the car if a cripple came. Now just run in the store and pick out some outfits.

  • Voice of Documentarian: Do you think that most people would say that teenage beauty pageants are a good idea?

    Gladys Leeman: Oh yeah, sure. I know what some of your big city, no-bra-wearing, hairy-legged women libbers might say. They might say that a pageant is old-fashioned and demeaning to the girls.

    Iris Clark: What's sick is women dressing like men.

    Gladys Leeman: You betcha, Iris. No, I think you boys are gonna find something a litle bit different here in Mount Rose. For one thing, we're all God-fearing folk, every last one of us. And you will not find a "back room" in our video store. No, no, that filth is better left to the sin cities.

    Iris Clark: AKA Minneapolis Saint Paul.

  • Gladys Leeman: Our 2nd runner-up and winner of a $50 scholarship to the Vo-Tech of her choice is Leslie Miller.

  • Gladys Leeman: He sells reproductions! His furniture's as fake as my orgasms!

  • Gladys Leeman: [nearly runs over a priest] Gosh darn it! Hello, Father Donegan - Sidewalks? Sidewalks?

    [Iris mimes drinking - "glug, glug"]

    Gladys Leeman: Iris, stop it. It's not his fault, the communal wine just proves too tempting for some of them.

    Iris Clark: And that's why we Lutherans use grape Kool-Aid for the blood of Christ.

  • Gladys Leeman: [to Becky on the swan float] Rebecca Ann Leeman, what's going... You are the one that wanted this, now get up there! I don't care if you have to ride this thing side-saddle like a horse, get up there!

    Becky Ann Leeman: It smells funny. Like gasoline.

    Gladys Leeman: Oh, for Christ's sake! Everything smells like that in Mexico!

    Becky Ann Leeman: My dress will reek, Mother.

    Gladys Leeman: You listen to me now missy, this thing cost your dad a pretty penny, so you get your ass up there! And show me some teeth!

    [Becky puts on a smile]

    Gladys Leeman: Lovely, baby.

Browse more character quotes from Drop Dead Gorgeous (1999)