Gilbert Noble Quotes in Say It Isn't So (2001)

Gilbert Noble: Jo, listen. I got great news. I, uh - I found Leon. I found Leon, and I got him dead to rights.

Josephine Wingfield: That's great, Gilly. Now, why don't you just pull your arm out of Leon's butt, and we'll take a drive to the hospital.

Streak: You got any naked pictures of your sister?

[chuckling]

Gilbert Noble: Of course not.

Streak: Wanna buy some?

Dig McCaffrey: Now, be a friend and fetch my getaway sticks, daddy.

Gilbert Noble: Your what?

Dig McCaffrey: My legs, captain. My legs.

Gilbert Noble: Oh, shit.

Dig McCaffrey: Less feces, more fetchin'. Get over here and get it, boy.

Larry Falwell: I mean this is the kinda think that makes a man wanta bludgeon his family and go on a three-day drunk.

Gilbert Noble: That's pretty serious talk, Larry. Maybe you should be speaking to a professional about these things.

Larry Falwell: You mean a hit man? Now, that's the easiest way to get caught. Unless you did it?

Gilbert Noble: I was talking about a shrink, Larry.

Larry Falwell: Get real... that's for crazy people.

Gilbert Noble: I'm sorry. I never hit anyone before.

Dig McCaffrey: Well, I'm glad I was your first. Hope I was gentle.

Valdine: [explaining her reasons for giving up her baby, to an increasingly dismayed Gilbert and Jo] I figured the best thing to do was to give you away. You know, to somebody who wouldn't resent you for your burden. I mean, one of you had to go and Jo was already house-broke.

Gilbert Noble: This can't be happening.

Valdine: I know this must be very difficult for you. But just think how lucky you are that you found out before it was too late, before you got married and consumated this forbidden relationship.

[causes Jo to run off to the bathroom, retching]

Valdine: Sweet Lord! You ponied your sister.

Gilbert Noble: Oh, my God.