General Quotes in Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)

General: I thought he'd be taller.

General: Mr. President, with all due respect, sir... what you're asking can't be done.

[President struggles and gets out of wheelchair]

President Franklin D. Roosevelt: [serious tone] Do not tell me it can't be done.

General: [Riding in a truck full of troops on its way to deal with Kong] Listen up. This is New York City, and this is sacred ground. You hear me? It was built for humans, by humans. Not for stinking lice-infested apes. The thought of some mutant gorilla crapping all over the streets of this fair city fills me with disgust. So this is how it's going to be: We find it. We kill it. We cut its ugly head off and we ram it up...

[the truck is immediately trampled by Kong]

Jack Ryan: Well... Ramius trained most of their Officer Corps, which would put him in a position to select men willing to help him. And he's not Russian. He's Lithuanian by birth, raised by his paternal grandfather, a fisherman. He has no children, no ties to leave behind. And today is the first anniversary of his wife's death.

General: Oh, come on. You're just an analyst, what can you possibly know what goes on in his mind?

Jack Ryan: I know Ramius, General. He's nearly a legend in the submarine community.

Ursa: Come forward. Your General wishes to speak.

General Zod: I am General Zod. Your ruler. Yes, today begins a new order. Your lands, your possessions, your very lives, will gladly be given in tribute to me, General Zod! In return for your obedience you will enjoy my generous protection. In other words you will be allowed to live.

[rips a Generals stars from his shoulder]

General Zod: So you are a General? And who is your superior?

General: I answer only to the President.

General Zod: And he will answer to me! Or all of his cities will end up like this one.

Professor Fate: Leslie escaped?

General: With a small friar.

Professor Fate: Leslie escaped with a chicken?

Prince Hapnick: You! You're the cause of it all! It was your idea!

General: No, no your highness... Baron von Schtupp...

Prince Hapnik: I don't care, I don't care! You're banished. I'm getting a new tucker-inner! Banished, banished, banished!

Leslie: It's been my experience, General, that there is little advantage to winning if one wins too easily.

Prince Hapnik: Rah! Oh oh, rah! Oh rah! Oh rah ah ah! What do you think of that, General?

General: An admirable point of view, for anyone but a soldier. In my profession, to win is imperative. To win easily is a blessing.

General: When we get back to the palace, you must trim your mustache. You must look exactly like the prince. Can you laugh?

Fate: What do you mean, can I laugh?

General: Well, the prince has a very individual laugh.

Fate: Like what?

General: Uh... ah ha HA ha ha.

[Fate tries to leave, but the General stops him and demonstrates again]

General: Ah ha HA ha ha.

Fate: HA HA HA HA HA.

General: No, that's too much bass. The prince is more of a soprano.

Fate: I won't do it!

General: Then you leave us no alternative.

[He draws a gun and points it at him]

Fate: I'll do it!

Cole: WHOO! Goddamn, boy! When we get back to Missouri, I'ma' tell all them little gals 'bout how little Jesse James charged the whole Union army by hisself!

General: Hey Cole, he keeps that up and he's liable to outrank you soon!

Cole: Well, but I'll still be better lookin', won't I?

General: Oooh, brief me!

General's Aide: It flew in and made a mockery of our defensive manoeuvres.

General: Get rid of it.

General: I didn't think Tokyo would escape this terror, but Rodan, Godzilla and Manda are all here at the same time.

Major Tada: That's correct. New York, London, Moscow - they were all very unlucky.

Announcer: Emergency! Emergency! Mothra is now in District Number 5.

Kilaak Queen: Ghidorah is a space monster. The monsters from Earth cannot win. I will get in touch with you, when you feel like giving up.

General: Why that...

General: When the tree falls, the monkey runs.

Chamberlain: Hmmmmm...

General: I hate your whimper!

Chamberlain: HMMMM!

[they proceed down the hallway]

Chamberlain: Hmmmmmmm-mmmmm...

General: QUIET!

General: Chamberlain! I challenge!

Chamberlain: Trial by stone.

General: Trial by stone!

General: Muska! Just don't forget that the government put *me* in charge of finding Laputa!

Col. Muska: Don't forget that as the government's secret agent, I am in charge of *you*, General.

General: [growling contemptuously] Blast! I really hate that man.

General: [when soldiers have gathered in observatory room on Laputa; Muska appears before them as a hologram]

General: What's going on?

Col. Muska: Hold your tongue, commoner! You are in the presence of the king of Laputa.

General: The man has gone *crazy*!

Col. Muska: I thought I would show you an example of Laputa's power. We are about to celebrate the rebirth of the Laputian kingdom.

[lowers crystal over the Black Stone]

Col. Muska: Prepare yourself for the thunder of Laputa!

[unleashes tremendous explosion from underside]

[soldiers observe the blast from the observatory]

Col. Muska: The fire of Heaven that destroyed Sodom and Gamorrah in the Old Testament. The Ramanayah referred to it as "Indra's Arrow." The entire world will once again kneel before the power of Laputa.

General: I can only say, "Well done, Muska. You're a credit to our country." As such, you deserve this reward!

[shoots at hologram, to no avail]

General: Huh?

[his gun runs out]

Col. Muska: [menacingly] I have really had enough of your incredible stupidity.

Sheeta: [to the soldiers] Run, everyone!

Col. Muska: [knocking Sheeta aside] You little brat!

[glares with fiendish glee as he raises the crystal over Black Stone]

Col. Muska: Goodbye! Enjoy the ride!

[Observatory floor opens; General and his soldiers fall to their deaths; Muska laughs maniacally]

General: [guffaws] If this is the great Avatar, then I am a warthog's uncle!

Weehawk: Funny you should say that.

[hurls his sword, skewering the general]

General: You'd better bring a coat Mr. Richardson, there's a little Jap in the air.

Dr. Morrison: He means nip.

Chef: Haven't you heard of the Emancipation Proclamation?

General: I don't listen to hip-hop.

General: Now each battalion has a specific code-name and mission. Battalion 5, raise your hands!

[all the African American members put up their hands including Chef]

General: You will be the all important first defense wave, which we will call "Operation Human Shield".

Chef: Hey, wait a minute...

General: Now keep in mind, 'Operation Human Shield' will suffer heavy losses. But don't lose your spirit men! Stay until the bitter end. Battalion 14?

[all the White soldiers raise their hands]

General: Right, you are 'Operation Get Behind The Darkies'. You will follow Battalion 5 here and try not to get killed for God's Sake. Are there any questions men?

[Chef raises his hand]

General: Yes Soldier?

Chef: Have you ever heard of the Emancipation Proclamation?

General: I don't listen to hip-hop!

Chef: Hey!

General: You ever... just know something, Dr. Nash?

Nash: Constantly.

General: But of course warfare isn't all fun. Right, stop that! It's all very well to laugh at the military, but when one considers the meaning of life, it is a struggle between alternative viewpoints of life itself. And without the ability to defend one's own viewpoint against other, perhaps more aggresive ideologies, then reasonableness and moderation could quite simply disappear. That is why we'll always need an Army, and may God strike me down were it to be otherwise.

Sergeant-Major: Don't stand there gawping! Like you've never seen the hand o' God before!

Marwood: [voiceover] If The Crow and Crown had ever had life it was dead now. It was like walking into a lung. A self-sustained nicotine-yellow and fly-blown lung. Its landlord was a retired alcoholic with military pretensions and a complexion like the inside of a teapot. By the time the doors opened he was arseholed on rum and got progressively more arseholed until he could take no more and fell over at about 12 o'clock.

[the drunken pub landlord opens the till and it hits it him the chest and he almost falls down]

General: Thought I was going for a minute. But no man's put me down yet. Have you had any training in the martial arts?

Withnail: Yes, as a matter of fact I have. Before I became a journalist I was in the Territorials.

General: Do you know, when you first came in here I knew you were a services man. You can never, never disguise it.

Withnail: What were you in?

General: Tanks. Afrika Korps. A little before your time. Don't suppose you've engaged, have you?

Withnail: Ireland.

General: Oooh, a crack at the Mick?

Withnail: We'll have another pair of large scotches.

General: These shall be my pleasure.

[he pours their drinks]

General: What are you doing up here, then?

Withnail: We're doing a feature for Country Life. Survey of rural types, you know, farmers, travelling tinkers, milkmen, that sort of thing.

General: Have you met Jake? Poacher. Works the lake, but keep it under your hat, hmm?

[they go and sit down with their drinks]

Marwood: What's all this Army bollocks?

Withnail: We got a drink, didn't we?

[a general greets Medal of Honor winner Staff Sgt. Raymond Shaw on his return to the U.S]

General: Congratulations, son. How do you feel?

Raymond Shaw: Like Captain Idiot in Astounding Science comics.

General: Misfortune follows misfortune. Madame, I have murdered your chauffeur. My humblest apologies.

General: Do you remember what Senator Baker said when the military appropriations bill came up for vote?

Secretary of Defense: He said we could safely reduce our armed forces by half.

General: He wasn't only wrong, he's dead.

General: Kill these puppies Jones!

Jones: Sir?

General: These puppies are a direct threat to the national security of the United States!