Gaston Lachaille Quotes in Gigi (1958)

Gigi: I don't know what you want. You told Grandmamma...

Gaston Lachaille: I know what I told your grandmother. We don't have to repeat it. Just tell me simply what you don't want... and tell me what you do want.

Gigi: Do you mean that?

Gaston Lachaille: Of course.

Gigi: You told Grandmamma that you wanted to take care of me.

Gaston Lachaille: To take care of you beautifully.

Gigi: Beautifully. That is, if I like it. They've pounded into my head I'm backward for my age... but I know what all this means. To "take care of me beautifully" means I shall go away with you... and that I shall sleep in your bed.

Gaston Lachaille: Please, Gigi, I beg of you! You embarrass me!

Gigi: You weren't embarrassed to talk to Grandmamma about it. And Grandmamma wasn't embarrassed to talk to me about it. But I know more than she told me. To "take care of me" means that I shall have my photograph in the papers. That I shall go to the Riviera, to the races at Deauville. And when we fight, it will be in all the columns the next day. And then you'd give me up, as you did with Inèz des Cèvennes.

Gaston Lachaille: Who's been filling your head with all these old stories? How do you know about that?

Gigi: Why shouldn't I know? You're world famous. I know about the woman who stole from you, the Contessa who wanted to shoot you, the American who wanted to marry you. I know what everybody knows.

Gaston Lachaille: These aren't the things we have to talk about together! That's all in the past, over and done with!

Gigi: Yes, Gaston. Until it begins again.

Madame Alvarez: How was Monte Carlo?

Gaston Lachaille: It was a bore!

Madame Alvarez: One has to be as rich as you are, Gaston, to be bored at Monte Carlo.

Gaston Lachaille: Whose luncheon are you taking me to today?

Honore Lachaille: Henri Trouvert.

Gaston Lachaille: Oh no!

Honore Lachaille: We have to go! I'm meeting a heavenly creature there.

Gaston Lachaille: You're still young uncle, aren't you?

Honore Lachaille: Not compared to her!

[last lines]

[after a long while, Gaston returns to Madame Alvarez's apartment]

Gaston Lachaille: May I come in?

[Gigi shrinks into a corner, hoping to be spared]

Madame Alvarez: Please, Gaston... no papers... no scandal.

Gaston Lachaille: Madame, will you do me the honour, the favour... give me the infinite joy of bestowing on me... Gigi's hand in marriage?

[Gigi, filled with relief and joy, draws to Gaston's side]

Madame Alvarez: [smiles] Thank Heaven!

["Thank Heaven for Little Girls" plays again]

Gaston Lachaille: I'm sorry I kept you waiting, Uncle. Why didn't you come upstairs?

Honore Lachaille: I was afraid I'd meet my brother and sister-in-law.

Gaston Lachaille: You would have.

Honore Lachaille: I have to tell you... your parents bore me to death.

Gaston Lachaille: Me too.

Honore Lachaille: But I've known them longer, so they've been boring me longer.

Gaston Lachaille: [singing] Oh Gigi! While you were trembling on the brink was I out yonder somewhere blinking at a star? / Oh Gigi! Have I been standing up too close or back too far? / When did your sparkle turn to fire, / And your warmth become desire? / Oh what miracle has made you the way you are? Gigi! Gigi! Gigi! Oh no! I was mad not to have seen the change in you! Oh, Gigi!

Gigi: Do you make love all the time?

Gaston Lachaille: I beg your pardon?

Gigi: Do you make love all the time, Gaston?

Gaston Lachaille: Certainly not! The only people who make love all the time are liars.

Gigi: [pointing] Is that the scandalous Madame d'Exelmans?

Gaston Lachaille: Yes, that is she. Tell me, Gigi, the way that you express yourself... does you grandmother hear you talk this way?

Gigi: She doesn't listen to me much.

Gaston Lachaille: Imagine this if you can! Here is a girl, living in a mouldy apartment: decaying walls, worm-ridden furniture, surrounded by filth...

Honore Lachaille: You're ruining my lunch!

Gaston Lachaille: My heart was touched. I wanted to help her. I offered her everything: house, car, servants, clothes, and me!

Honore Lachaille: And...?

Gaston Lachaille: She turned me down.

Honore Lachaille: Turned you down?

Gaston Lachaille: Turned me down!

Honore Lachaille: It is impossible!

Gaston Lachaille: It is not impossible, it just happened! I was refused, rejected, rebuffed and... repudiated!

Gaston Lachaille: I brought you some caramels.

Gigi: Thank you, Gaston.

Madame Alvarez: Gaston, you spoil her so.

Gaston Lachaille: The champagne is for you.

Madame Alvarez: You spoil me too.

Gaston Lachaille: [having broken off with Liane] I've been weighing the idea of going to the country for a while.

Honore Lachaille: You mean, leave Paris?

Gaston Lachaille: Yes. Why not?

Honore Lachaille: Why not? That's the one thing you mustn't do. Do you want people to think you're despondent? Disturbed? If you leave, they will, you know. No, no. That would be snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. No, no, no. For the next few weeks, you should be out every night. Maxim's, Moulin Rouge, Pre Catalan.

Gaston Lachaille: The Pre Catalan is closed.

Honore Lachaille: Open it! You must be carefree. Devil-may-care. A different girl every night. Keep them guessing who's next. Play the game. Be gay, extravagant, outrageous!

Gigi: [pointing at Gaston's cane] Is that gold?

Gaston Lachaille: The handle, yes.

Gigi: You must be very rich to have a gold handle on your cane.

[discussing Gigi's lessons with Aunt Alicia]

Madame Alvarez: Last week she taught her to eat cold lobster to perfection.

Gaston Lachaille: What in heaven's name for?

Madame Alvarez: She says it's extremely useful.

Gaston Lachaille: I must consider my next move very carefully. All of Paris is watching me.

Madame Alvarez: Gaston, what are you talking about? The whole world is watching you!

[playing cards]

Gaston Lachaille: And therefore, I win!

Gigi: And therefore... you lose!

Gaston Lachaille: You cheated! Where did you get that fourth ace?

Honore Lachaille: Did she send a note?

Gaston Lachaille: Obviously.

Honore Lachaille: Oh, good, good! Did you have to change the arrangements?

Gaston Lachaille: Don't be vulgar.

Honore Lachaille: Ah, well, she's a wonderful girl, Gigi. So young, so fresh, so vulgar. She's not sophisticated like most other woman are, but then what do sophisticated women have to offer? Nothing! They are boring, they have no surprises! But a liaison with someone like Gigi can last for months!

Gaston Lachaille: Good night. Good night!

Honore Lachaille: Don't you marvel at the power / of the mighty Eiffel Tower / knowing there it will remain evermore? / Climbing up to the sky / over ninety stories high!

Gaston Lachaille: How many stories?

Honore Lachaille: Ninety!

Gaston Lachaille: How many yesterday?

Honore Lachaille: Ninety!

Gaston Lachaille: And tomorrow?

Honore Lachaille: Ninety!

Gaston Lachaille: It's a bore!

Honore Lachaille: But think of a race / with your horse in seventh place / and he suddenly begins and he catches up and wins with a roar!

Gaston Lachaille: It's a bore!

Gaston Lachaille: [Gaston speculates on the unfaithfulness of his mistress Liane] She's so gay tonight / She's like spring tonight / She's a rollicking, frolicking thing tonight / So disarming, soft and charming / She is not thinking of me / No, she's not thinking of me! In her eyes tonight / There's a glow tonight / They're so bright they could light Fountainbleu tonight / She's so gracious, so vivacious / She is not thinking of me! Bless her little heart / Crooked to the core / Acting out a part / What a rollicking, frolicking bore! She's such fun tonight / She's a treat tonight / You could spread her on bread, she's so sweet tonight / So devoted, sugar-coated / That it's heart-warming to see / Oh, she's simmering with love / Oh, she's shimmering with love / Oh, she's not thinking of me! She is not thinking of me! / Someone has set her on fire / Is it Jacques? Is it Paul or Leon? / Who's turning her furnace up higher? / Oh she's hot, but it's not for Gaston! Oh, she's gay tonight / Oh, so gay tonight / A gigantic, romantic cliché tonight / How she blushes, how she gushes / How she fills me with ennui! / She's so ooh-la-la-la-la, so UNTRUE-la-la-la-la / Oh, she's not thinking of me!

Aunt Alicia: And how is your dear father? Well, I hope.

Gaston Lachaille: He has diabetes.

Aunt Alicia: Well, I suppose if you are in the sugar business...

[Gaston sees Gigi dressed in an alluring white gown]

Gigi: Look, Gaston! Four yards of material in the skirt! Well, don't I look great ladyish?

Gaston Lachaille: You look like an organ-grinder's monkey!

Gigi: An organ-grinder's monkey?

Gaston Lachaille: What happened to your little Scotch dress? And that ridiculous collar!

Gigi: And what's wrong with that collar?

Gaston Lachaille: It makes you look like a giraffe with a goiter!

Gigi: With all the talk there is about you, Gaston, I've never heard it said you had any taste in clothes!

Gaston Lachaille: [about Liane d'Exelmans] What do you think of her?

Gigi: She is... common!

Gaston Lachaille: Common? What, you mean "ordinary" common or "coarse" common?

Gigi: Ordinary common... and coarse!

[leaves]

Honore Lachaille: Look at all the captivating / fascinating things there are to do!

Gaston Lachaille: Name two.

Honore Lachaille: Look at the pleasures / of the myriad of treasures / we have got!

Gaston Lachaille: Like what?

Honore Lachaille: Look at Paris in the spring / when each solitary thing / is more beautiful than ever before! / You can hear every tree / almost saying "Look at me!"

Gaston Lachaille: What color are the trees?

Honore Lachaille: Green!

Gaston Lachaille: What color were they last year?

Honore Lachaille: Green!

Gaston Lachaille: And next year?

Honore Lachaille: Green!

Gaston Lachaille: It's a bore!

Honore Lachaille: The River Seine!

Gaston Lachaille: All it can do is flow.

Honore Lachaille: But think of wine!

Gaston Lachaille: It's red or white.

Honore Lachaille: But think of girls!

Gaston Lachaille: It's either yes or no, and if it's no or if it's yes! / It simply couldn't matter less!

Honore Lachaille: Life is thrilling as can be!

Gaston Lachaille: Simply not my cup of tea...

Honore Lachaille: It's a gay romantic fling!

Gaston Lachaille: If you like that sort of thing.

Honore Lachaille: It's intriguing!

Gaston Lachaille: It's fatiguing!

Honore Lachaille: It's a game!

Gaston Lachaille: It's the same dull world where ever you go, whatever place you are at / The earth is round, but everything on it is flat!

Honore Lachaille: Don't tell me Venice has no lure!

Gaston Lachaille: Just a town without a sewer.

Honore Lachaille: The Leaning Tower I adore!

Gaston Lachaille: Indecision is a bore!

Honore Lachaille: But think of the thrill of a bull fight in Seville / when the bull is uncontrolled / and he challenges the bold matador!

Gaston Lachaille: It's a bore!

Honore Lachaille: Think of lunch beneath the trees!

Gaston Lachaille: Stop the carriage, if you please!

Honore Lachaille: You mean you don't want to come?

Gaston Lachaille: The thought of lunch leaves me numb.

Honore Lachaille: But I implore...!

Gaston Lachaille: Oh, no, Uncle! It's a bore!

[singing about how to deal with Liane]

Honore Lachaille: Just imagine her chagrin / when she sees you wander in/ And you find her with that slippery senor / What a moment supreme / when she totters with a scream...!

Gaston Lachaille: What will she do?

Honore Lachaille: Scream!

Gaston Lachaille: What did yours do?

Honore Lachaille: Scream!

Gaston Lachaille: What do they all do?

Honore Lachaille: Scream!

Gaston Lachaille: It's a bore!

Honore Lachaille: But think of the bliss / of the pleasure you would miss / When she topples in a heap / and you leave her there to weep on the floor...

Gaston Lachaille: It's a bore!

Honore Lachaille: You must catch her if you can!

Manuel: For the dignity of man!

Honore Lachaille: Take advantage of the chance!

Manuel: You owe it, sir, to France!

Honore Lachaille, Manuel: This is war!

Gaston Lachaille: All right! But it's a bore!

[singing]

Gigi: What time tomorrow will we get there? / Can I watch you play roulette? / May I stay up late for supper? / Is it awfully awfully upper?

Madame Alvarez: Gigi, you'll drive us wild! / Stop, you silly child!

Gigi: Is everybody celebrated, / full of sin and dissipated? / Is it hot enough to blister? / Will I be your little sister?

Madame Alvarez: Gigi, you are absurd! / Now not another word! Gigi!

Gaston Lachaille: Let her gush and jabber, / let her be enthused! / I cannot remember / when I have been more amused!

Madame Alvarez: Stop it!

Gigi: The night they invented champagne, / it's plain as it can be / they thought of you and me. / The night they invented champagne, / they absolutely knew / that all we'd want to do / is fly to the sky on champagne / And shout to everyone in sight / that since the world began / no woman or a man / has ever been as happy as we are tonight!

Gaston Lachaille: The night they invented champagne...

[pops a cork]

Gigi, Gaston Lachaille: ...It's plain as it can be / they thought of you and me. / The night they invented champagne / they absolutely knew / that all we'd want to do / Is fly to the sky on champagne / and shout to everyone in sight

[pops another cork]

Gigi, Gaston Lachaille: That since the world began / no woman or a man / has ever been as happy as we are tonight!

[a cork is popped]

Gaston Lachaille: [singing] She's a babe! / Just a babe! / Still cavorting in her crib / Eating breakfast with a bib / with her baby teeth / and all her baby curls! / She's a tot! / Just a tot! / Good for bouncing on your knee! / I am positive that she / doesn't even know that boys aren't girls! / She's a snip! / Just a snip! / Making dreadful baby noise, / having fun with all her toys! / Just a chickadee who needs a mother hen! / She's a cub, a papoose! / You could never turn her loose! / She's too infantile to take her from her pen! / Of course, that weekend in Trouville, / in spite of all her youthful zeal, / she was exceedingly polite / and on the whole a sheer delight. / And if it wasn't joy galore, / at least not once was she a bore, / that I recall. / No, not at all... / Ah, she's a child! / A silly child! / Adolescent to her toes / and good Heaven how it shows / Sticky thumbs are all the fingers she has got! / She's a child! / A clumsy child! / She's as swollen as a grape / and she doesn't have a shape / where her figure ought to be, / It is not! / Just a child! / A growing child / that's so backward for her years, / if a boy her age appears / I am certain he will never call again! / She's a scamp and a brat, / doesn't know where she is at, / unequipped and undesirable to men! / Of course, I must confess / that in that brand new little dress, / she looked surprisingly mature / and had a definite allure. / It was a shock in fact to me, / the most amazing shock to see / the way it clung / on one, so young! / She's a girl, / a little girl! / Getting older, it is true, / which is what they always do / till that unexpected hour / when they blossom like a flower! Oh, no! Oh, no! But... but... there's sweeter music when she speaks, isn't there? / Could I be wrong? Could it be so? / Oh where, oh where did Gigi go? / Gigi! Am I a fool without a mind or have I merely been too blind to realize? / Oh Gigi! Why you've been growing up before my very eyes / Gigi! You're not at all that funny, awkward little girl, I knew / oh no! Overnight there's been a breathless change in you...

Gigi: Do you make love all the time, Gaston?

Gaston Lachaille: Certainly not! The only people who make love all the time are liars.