Frank Mercer Quotes in Matchstick Men (2003)

Frank Mercer: [narration from Frank's letter to Roy] Dear Roy, You're probably pretty upset. I don't blame you. You taught me most of what I know, so I suppose I owe you better than this. But you always told me if I ever got a shot at a big score, I should take it. And that's what I did. Sorry about the sap on the head, by the way, and for everything else. You always said guys like us can't afford to have regrets about what we do. That's gonna be a little harder for me, but I'll manage. If it makes any difference, you're the best I ever saw. I'd never find a better partner, and now I won't have to. I love you, man. Frank. P.S. Enjoy the gift.

[chuckles]

Frank Mercer: You waited too long. No prize for you.

Frank Mercer: [on the phone] Roy

[burps]

Frank Mercer: I wouldn't bother you, but, well I'm dying Roy, it's my spleen, I can't... I can't feel my thumbs.

Roy: You lookin' for something, sucker?

Frank Mercer: Yeah. My partner. You seen him? He's been missing most of the week. Tall, good-looking guy.

Frank Mercer: Man, you are bad! Did you take your pills?

Frank Mercer: There's just one problem.

Roy: What?

Frank Mercer: I think I'm in love with you.

Roy: You good to go?

Frank Mercer: Does the Pope pooh in the woods?

Roy: [Panicing] When... you're done, could you... wipe off the phone?

Frank Mercer: Yeah sure

[wipes on the back off his pants and his crotch]

Frank Mercer: How's that?

Roy: Oh God!

Frank Mercer: Whoa! I'm just kidding, just kidding!

Frank Mercer: Okay, I'd just like to, you know, take a girl out somewhere nice once in a while.

Roy: You have to pay extra for that?

Frank Mercer: You want your forty g's?

Roy: Consider it a parting gift.

Frank Mercer: We should part more often.