Flight Attendant Quotes in Daredevil (2003)

[Bullseye has used airline peanuts to suffocate an annoying passenger]

Flight Attendant: Can I get you anything before we land?

Bullseye: More peanuts... please.

[last lines]

Flight Attendant: Excuse me. Mr. Hunt? Would you like to watch a movie?

Ethan Hunt: Oh, uh, no thank you.

Flight Attendant: Would you consider the cinema of the Caribbean? Aruba, perhaps?

[Ethan gives a suspicious look]

Flight Attendant: You know, if you do try and get some sleep, the flight will go a lot faster.

Jack Ryan: I can never sleep on a plane. Turbulence.

Flight Attendant: Pardon?

Jack Ryan: Turbulence. Solar radiation heats the Earth's crust, warm air rises, cold air descends - turbulence. I, I don't like that.

Flight Attendant: Oh. Well, try to get some sleep anyway.

[first lines]

Flight Attendant: I said, "Look, lady, it's not the seats that have gotten smaller, it's your ass that has gotten bigger."

Flight Attendant: [pointing to Giles' weathervane] Can I take that for you?

Giles Redferne: Over my rotting corpse!

[last lines]

Dasha: [to flight attendant] Hey, boy!

Danila: [on the phone] Okay. Tell Boris I'm bringing him a present.

Dasha: Get us some vodka.

Flight Attendant: Sorry, we don't serve drinks during the take-off.

Danila: [on the phone] Heh! Bye.

Dasha: Boy, you don't understand. Bring us some vodka.

[removes her wig]

Dasha: We're going home.

Flight Attendant: Oh, I see. I'll be right back.

Lucy: [to herself] I choose Gru.

[to the stewardess]

Lucy: I choose Gru!

[runs to the plane's emergency hatch and opens it]

Lucy: Thank you, Gru-stewardess!

Flight Attendant: You're welcome!

[Lucy jumps out of the plane and presses the clasp of her purse, which turns into a hang glider, parasailing off in search of Gru]

Flight Attendant: Girls, the pilots are down in the restaurant and they want to buy us dinner.

Flight Attendant: Captain Cohen's down there? Never too late for a fifth husband. Lets go girls!

Flight Attendant: [turns around to leave, but stops mid stride] The kids!

Mary Lynn: Don't worry ma'am, I'm a certified babysitter. I get paid 50 cents an hour.

Flight Attendant: Mary Lynn, there's a twenty in this for you.

Flight Attendant: [all the flight attendants leave for the restaurant] Captain Cohen, here I come!

Tori Avalon: [whispers] Hey. You have to take off your shoes before you step on the plane.

Sakura Avalon: Really?

Tori Avalon: [nods]

Flight Attendant: [while Sakura removes her shoes] Miss, you can step on as you are.

Sakura Avalon: [goes red] Tori!

Flight attendant: OH GOD! Ugh! I can't believe you fell for that crap! That's from 'Pretty In Pink!'

Janey: Are you sure?

Flight attendant: Trust me!

Jake: Excuse me, what are you doing?

Flight attendant: Let me give you a little piece of advice here, Jake. Why don't you lose the "I'm the cute and sensitive, popular boy with the big side-burns routine. It's just too pathetic! And for once tell Janey what's true in your heart. Stop being such a little bitch! And you Janey! Little miss other-side-of-the-tracks awkward rebel girl with the pseudo-intellectual glasses, why don't you wise-up to Jake's bullshit! Stop being such a dumbass!

Flight attendant: We all know where this is going... fucking teenagers.

Flight attendant: Stop being such a dumbass.

Flight Attendant: Sir, we have a policy on this airline that if a bag is this large we take...

Greg Focker: okay you know what, take you scrubby little paws *off* my bag, okay? It's not like I have a bomb in here. It's not like I wanna blow up the plane. I just want to store my bag according to your safety regulations.

Flight Attendant: Sir, sir!

Greg Focker: Hey, hey, If you would take a second, take the little sticks out of your head, clean out your ears, and maybe you would see that I'm a person who has feelings, and all I have to do is do what I wanna do and all I want to do is hold on to my bag and not listen to you! And the only way that I would ever let go of my bag would be if you came over here right now and tried to pry it from my dead, lifeless fingers, okay? If you can get it from my kung-fu grip then you can come and have it, okay? Otherwise, step off, bitch.

[Greg is trying to fit his large bag into the overhead bin]

Flight Attendant: I'm sorry, sir, you're gonna have to check that.

Greg Focker: I got it.

Flight Attendant: No, I'm sorry, that bag won't fit.

Greg Focker: No, no, I'm not - hey, I'm not checking my bag, okay?

Flight Attendant: There's no need to raise your voice, sir.

Greg Focker: I'm not raising my voice. THIS WOULD BE RAISING MY VOICE TO YOU, okay? I don't want to check my bag, okay? And, by the way, your airline? You SUCK at checking bags, okay, because I already did that once and you lost it, and then I had everything screwed up very badly for me, okay?

Flight Attendant: Well, I can assure you that your bag will be placed safely below deck with the other luggage...

Greg Focker: Oh, yeah? How do you know my bag will be safe below with the other luggage? Huh? Are you physically going to take my bag and put it beneath the plane? Are you going to go right now outside, with the guys with the earmuffs, and go put it in there?

Flight Attendant: No...

Greg Focker: No? Okay, then shut your piehole and listen to me when I say that I am FINISHED with the checking-of-the-bags CONVERSATION.

Flight Attendant: You didn't win.

Marylin Rexroth: Excuse me?

Flight Attendant: I can always tell, coming back from Vegas, who didn't win.

Marylin Rexroth: You're right.

[boarding a plane at JFK]

Flight Attendant: Do you think you're late enough?

Grimm: Oh, you must be from around here.

Flight Attendant: [to the Brady kids doing a song, intercom] May I have your attention, please. Would those of you dancing and singing in the aisles, please sit down and sit up!

[everyone on the plane applauds]

Flight Attendant: There was this strange humming sound coming from his pants.

Roland Jones: From the front or the back?

Flight Attendant: Would you like the cancer?

Ryan Bingham: What?

Flight Attendant: [misunderstanding her] the cancer?

Flight Attendant: [showing him the actual beverage can] Would you like the can, sir?

Max Klein: Did you hear that?

Jeff Gordon: Max, this is a very important meeting. I need you to calm down. I need you to be with me. All right? God, you're such a neurotic.

[pause]

Max Klein: Something's not right.

[an explosion rocks the cabin, and the passengers scream]

Max Klein: Oh shit!

Pilot: [over the P.A., frantically] This is your Captain. Please return to your seats, put your tray tables up and fasten your seatbelts.

Flight Attendant: Ladies and gentlemen, please be sure to fasten your seatbelts tightly around your waist! The flight attendants will be coming by to collect all your trays!

[the cabin shakes heavily, bags drop from the overhead compartments]

Passenger #2: Is everything okay?

Flight Attendant: We're just fine. We just hit a little unexpected turbulence.

Pilot: [over the P.A., calmly] This is your Captain speaking.

Passenger #1: I don't think this is turbulence!

Pilot: We're experiencing problems with our hydraulic system.

Max Klein: The hydraulics!

Jeff Gordon: What?

Max Klein: [screaming] He can't steer! We're going down!

[the plane starts spiraling down]

[Having just been jolted out of his premonition, Alex is wild-eyed and hyperventilating as he verifies that the tray table latch is broken, which means his vision was real]

Flight Attendant: Is there a a problem, sir?

Carter: What's your fuckin' problem?

Mr. Larry Murnau: [Speaking in French] What is it?

Alex Browning: [screaming] This fuckin' plane's gonna explode!

Flight Attendant: We will remove you from this aircraft!

Alex Browning: Fuck you! I'll remove myself!