Fergie Quotes in Foul Play (1978)

Fergie: Oh, ho, I'll tell ya, I've been on some dumb calls in my time, but this one tops 'em all. Where did you meet this ding dong anyway? Hey, what's all that stuff about having her for lunch down at the station house tomorrow? You're not even supposed to be riding around with me.

Tony Carlson: It's fate, Fergie. It's kismet.

Fergie: Kismet, my ass. Listen, this girl is weird, Tony...

Tony Carlson: Yeah, yeah, yeah, but she's got the prettiest green eyes I've ever seen.

Fergie: Hey, they're blue. And behind those blue eyes is a fruitcake with a homicidal umbrella.

Tony Carlson: [excitedly] Wait a minute.

Fergie: What?

Tony Carlson: [grabbing Fergie's face and looking into his eyes] You're the one with the prettiest green eyes I've ever seen.

Fergie: You cut that out. I hate it when you do that. Don't do that anymore, all right?

Tony Carlson: Let's go, beautiful.

Fergie: Well, what was he after?

Gloria Mundy: He wanted the cigarettes.

Fergie: He was after a cigarette?

Gloria Mundy: Oh no, he wanted the whole pack.

Fergie: Man, talk about greedy.

Fergie: Benny McGill's wee brother's a smart wee cunt. How do you no' know I'm no' on my way to go stab fuck out of him right now? And how do you know I wouldnae take it out on you? See that there? That's a fucking blade. Know what that's used for? For gutting daft wee fucking boys like you, you wee cunt. Luckily for you, however, I'm a fuckin' good guy, and me and Benny are good pals.