Elizabeth Collins Stoddard Quotes in Dark Shadows (2012)

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: What do you think of the President?

Victoria Winters: Never met him.

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: What do you think of the war?

Victoria Winters: I don't watch television.

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Do you think the sexes should be equal?

Victoria Winters: Heavens, no. Men would become quite unmanageable.

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: I think we're going to get along fine.

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: What did you do to my daughter?

Angelique Bouchard: The family tree needed a little spicing up, so I sent a werewolf to bite her as a child.

[sees David]

Angelique Bouchard: Just as I sent David's mother to the bottom of the ocean, rendering him a motherless whelp!

[turns to Barnabas]

Angelique Bouchard: And as for you... I killed your parents, and every one of your lovers. They kept us apart.

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Children, get away from that man!

David Collins: He said his name was Barnabas Collins.

Carolyn Stoddard: And I'm pretty sure he called me a hooker.

Carolyn Stoddard: Leave us alone!

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Carolyn? Carolyn, my God!

Carolyn Stoddard: I'm a werewolf, okay? Let's not make a big deal out of it. Woof!

David Collins: That's enough. Leave us alone.

Angelique Bouchard: I think I'll start by killing you, orphan!

[advances on David]

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: David, run!

Barnabas Collins: [to Angelique] Your quarrel is with me!

Angelique Bouchard: My quarrel is with ALL of you!

Barnabas Collins: Tell me, what do you know of Barnabas Collins?

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Just legends, really. Two centuries ago, a witch turned him into a vampire and locked him away.

Barnabas Collins: What is known of his death?

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Nothing.

Barnabas Collins: That, madam, is because he never died. I am Barnabas Collins.

[reveals a secret passage]

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Then, you...

Barnabas Collins: I am a vampire, madam. But I am also a Collins, and I swear by all I hold sacred I will not harm anyone under this roof.

Barnabas Collins: I know the body of this house as I do my own. Every brick, every passage...

[opens a vault to find it filled with macrame]

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: That's where I keep my macrame.

Barnabas Collins: A disgraceful misuse, madam!

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Angelique! Get out of my house!

[fires at Angelique with a shotgun]

Angelique Bouchard: Your house?

[from trailer]

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Fight on, Barnabas. Fight on for us.

Barnabas Collins: And fight I shall!

Barnabas Collins: How soon can the horses be ready?

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: We don't have horses, we have a Chevy.

[Barnabas looks confused]

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: His name was Barnabas Collins, and he was the finest man this family ever knew.

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: [Barnabas has saved David from being crushed by a falling mirror ball, but is now standing in direct sunlight] Barnabas... you're on fire.

[Roger leaves Collinwood]

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Where is Dr Hoffman when you need her?

Barnabas Collins: Indeed.

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: I always thought there was something strange about Angie, but a witch...

Barnabas Collins: It is she whose hate was so strong she turned me into this hideous creature!

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: No, if she had hated you she would have merely killed you. A curse takes devotion.

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Welcome home, Barnabas Collins.

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: [to Victoria] Welcome to Collinwood. You'll have to imagine us on a better day.

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: She's a witch!

[points at Angelique]

Elizabeth Collins Stoddard: Peace wins every war.