Edgar Quotes in Snowpiercer (2013)

Edgar: They've got no bullets!

Edgar: What does steak taste like again? I had it once, but I can't remember.

Curtis: If you can't remember then it's better to forget.

Edgar: What does it smell like when it's cooked? It must emanate around the place.

Tanya: Look at all those beds... Where is everybody?

Edgar: Looks like they were in a hurry.

Bug: Place your projectile weapon on the ground.

Edgar: You can have my gun, when you pry it from my cold dead fingers.

Bug: Your proposal is acceptable.

Edgar: I go out, I work my butt off to make a living, all I want is to come home to a nice clean house with a nice fat steak on the table, but instead I get this. It looks like poison. Don't you take that away, I'm eating that, damn it! It IS poison, isn't it? I swear to God I would not be surprised if it was, the way you skulk around here like a dog that's been hit too much or ain't been hit enough, I can't make up my mind. You're useless, Beatrice. The only thing that pulls its weight around here is my goddamn truck!

[Just then, a flying saucer smashes his truck, and Edgar comes out of the house to look at the damage]

Edgar: Figures.

[Dr. Weaver is trying to stall Edgar so she can escape]

Dr. Weaver: You don't want to eat me. I'm a very important person on my planet. Like a queen, a goddess even. There are those who worship me. I'm not saying this to impress you, I'm just warning you it could start a war.

Edgar: War? Good. That means more food for my family. All 78 million of them. That's a lot of mouths to feed, Highness.

Dr. Weaver: You're a wonderful dad, but I'm staying HERE!

[escapes]

Beatrice: Edgar, what on earth was that?

Edgar: [Bug in disguise] Sugar...

Beatrice: I've never seen sugar do that.

Edgar: Give me... sugar... in water.

[the Bug takes Dr. Weaver with him into the flying saucer]

Edgar: You're coming with me.

Dr. Weaver: What?

Edgar: It's a long trip. I'll need a snack.

Edgar: Where do you keep your dead?

Manny the News Vendor: [thinks] I don't have any dead.

Edgar: Where?

Manny the News Vendor: I don't know, the city morgue!

Edgar: Get your big butt back in the house!

[Edgar is listening in on Madame discussing her will]

Madame Adelaide Bonfamille: As you know, I have no living relatives, and I want my cats to be well taken care of. And who can do that better than my faithful servant, Edgar?

Georges Hautecourt: Edgar? Adelaide, you mean you're giving your vast fortune to Edgar?All your stocks and bonds, this-this mansion, your country chateau, your jewels and gems...?

Madame Adelaide Bonfamille: No, no, no, George. To my cats.

Georges Hautecourt: To your cats?

Edgar: [gasping] Cats?

Madame Adelaide Bonfamille: Yes. I just wish for the cats to inherit first. Then at the end of their life span, the entire estate reverts to Edgar.

Edgar: Cats inherit first, and I come after the cats! After I... oh. It's not fair!

[Stands up, hits head on intercom]

Edgar: Ooh! I mean, each cat will live about twelve years, I can't wait... and each cat has nine lives! That's four times twelve, times nine... No, it's less than that. Anyway, that's more than I'll ever live. I'll be gone! No, oh, no. They'll be gone. I'll think of a way. After all, there are millions of reasons why I should. All of them dollars. Millions. Those cats have got to go!

Georges Hautecourt: Come on, Edgar. Last one upstairs is a nincompoop.

Edgar: Could we take the elevator this time, sir?

Georges Hautecourt: That birdcage? Poppycock! Elevators are for old people. Whoops!

[Hautecourt almost falls back, Edgar catches him]

Edgar: May I give you a hand, sir?

Georges Hautecourt: You wouldn't have an extra foot, would you, Edgar?

Edgar: Morning, Frou-Frou, my pretty steed.

[whispers]

Edgar: Can you keep a secret?

[out loud]

Edgar: Of course you can.

[chuckles]

Edgar: I've some news straight from the horse's mouth. If you'll pardon the expression, of course.

Edgar: [his last words] You're going to Timbuktu if it's the last thing I do.

Mabel: This year, I lost my dear husband, Edgar.

Edgar: Stop tellin' everyone I'm dead!

Bo: I guess it's our turn. This is the year I met the MOST gorgeous...

Nookie: No... YOU'RE gorgeous.

Bo: You're gorgeous... -ER.

Tug: Get a cave.

Igor: Oy.

[starts speaking in his language]

Mabel: If only EDGAR was alive.

Edgar: I told you, woman, I'm right here.

Bo: I love you, buttercup.

Michelle: [speaking really fast] Guess what? You'll never guess what, I'll betcha! Uncle Cornelius said I could go with you on your ramble today, but I'll betcha he's forgotten all about it, & I'll never, EVER get to see what the big surprise is!

[inhales deeply]

Michelle: What took you so long?

Abigail: My dad!

Edgar: My mother!

Russell: No breakfast!

Cornelius: Well, what do you have to say?

Edgar: Uh... sorry we're late?

Edgar: [tapping a road with his foot] This ground isn't normal. It's hard.

Michelle: [sniffing the road] And it smells kind of funny!

Edgar: We're going to climb?

Russell: We can't DIG our way up!

Edgar: You know, Abigail, sometimes I wish I was brave... like you.

Abigail: You are.

Edgar: How are we gonna get anybody to help us find the herbs?

Russell: Maybe these guys won't be so grouchy after they eat.

Abigail: Well, we can't wait that long!

Waggs: Aha! NOW the truth comes out! They're just here to steal our food!

Edgar: No, we're just looking for lungwort & eyebright.

Waggs: Liar!

Edgar: It's true! We need the herbs to heal a sick badger back home!

Waggs: More lies! Why would a mole, a mouse, and a hedgehog want to help a foul-smelling, worm-eating, good-for-nothing badger?

Edgar: Michelle's none of those things. She's our friend, understand? And we've come too far to be stopped now. Step aside!

Russell: Wait a minute! I know how to get up there. We'll use Cornelius' Flapper-Wing-A-Ma-Thing.

Edgar: Russell, good thinking! We'll FLY to the top of the cliff!

Willy: You don't really mean "fly"?

Waggs: You heard 'em, Willy. They'll flap their little paws & fly like birdies.

[laughing]

Edgar's Mothers: Oh, Edgar! When we ran from the gas, I was worried sick about you! Did you forget your scarf somewhere?

Edgar: No, Mama. This is what I forgot.

[Edgar kisses his mama]

Phineas: Is there a ray of hope?

Wrens: [in unison] A ray of hope?

Edgar: [imitating Phineas] Yes, there is a ray of hope! Brothers & sisters, we can SAVE Bosworth!

Wrens: HALLELUJAH!

Abigail: I can hardly see him behind his papers. He must be working on an experiment.

Edgar: Good. Maybe he won't notice we're late.

Michelle: I bet he's working on the big surprise, I'll betcha!

Russell: Oh, I LOVE surprises! Let's have a look!

Russell: What's he squawking about?

Edgar: Shhhh... someone's died.

Russell: Oh...

Waggs: For all the good it'll do you, I'd like to see YOU get the lungwort! No one in Oakdale's ever been able to reach it! But I'll bet you three can!

Russell: That's right! We've already got a plan, right, Edgar?

Edgar: I don't know.

Edgar: Come on, we'd better hurry!

Michelle: If Uncle Cornelius asks, tell him it isn't MY fault you're late!

Estelle: I wanted to tell you the truth!

Edgar: Unfortunately, the truth makes everything else seem like a lie.

Edgar: I trust you found everything to your satisfaction?

Ella: Yes, thank you.

Edgar: Good, good.

[Edgar knocks book off table]

Edgar: Oh, dear. How clumsy of me. Pick it up.

[Ella picks it up]

Edgar: Very good. Now touch your toes.

Ella: [touching her toes] Oh, no.

Edgar: Oh, yes. And while you're about it, why don't you pat your head and rub your tummy at the same time?

[Ella does so]

Edgar: Now jump up and down.

Ella: [jumping up and down] Please stop.

Edgar: Wait. Perhaps you know this one.

[sings]

Edgar: Put your left foot in...

[Ella puts left foot in]

Edgar: ...put your left foot out...

[Ella puts left foot out]

Edgar: ...put your left foot in...

[Ella puts left foot in]

Edgar: ...and shake it all about. Shake, shake, shake. Shake, shake, shake.

[Ella shakes]

Edgar: Shake your booty. Shake your booty.

[Ella shakes booty]

Edgar: Oh ho! This is fabulous!

Heston: Hate to be a party pooper, but Edgar, evil plans, remember?

Edgar: Yes, you're right

[to Ella]

Edgar: Okay, stop.

Edgar: So, Ella of Frell is your sister.

Hattie: Step-sister, actually.

Edgar: Really? Tell me what do you know about her?

Hattie: What's in it for me?

Heston: How about that your eyeballs remain inside your head?

Edgar: You vile little girl!

Miles Harding: "You can play it for her, you can play it for me."

Edgar: What?

Miles Harding: Play it, Sam.

Edgar: What key?

Miles Harding: Your favorite.

Edgar: You want verses first, or the choruses?

Miles Harding: Any way you like.

Edgar: Yeah!

[instrumental bridge of Jeff Lynne's song "Video" plays]

Edgar: [singing] Hug, hold, squeeze and lick / Darling, I love you to bits / And I want to see your tits.

Dr. Ruth Westheimer: When you are sitting in front of a crackling fireplace...

Edgar: Crackling fireplace.

Dr. Ruth Westheimer: ...and you take that lady into your arms...

Edgar: But I don't *have* any arms.

Dr. Ruth Westheimer: Oh dear. Do you have anything you can touch her with?

Edgar: I don't have *anything*!

Dr. Ruth Westheimer: Oh dear. Maybe you should go to a clinic.

Edgar: But I can't, Dr. Ruth. Moles keeps me locked up.

Dr. Ruth Westheimer: Locked up? You must call the police right away!

Edgar: Right away. Yeah!

Edgar: Mel-o-dy. Hmm.

Budweiser commerical: [singing] This Bud's for you...

Edgar: Too slow.

Volkswagon commercial: [singing, with text] Volkswagon does it, again.

Edgar: Too simple.

Dr. Pepper commercial: [singing] Hold out for Dr. Pepper.

Edgar: Too long.

Pepsi commercial: [singing] Get that Pepsi spirit. Drink it in, drink it in, drink it in.

Edgar: Yes! Now, backwards.

[Jeff Lynne's song "Video" begins]

Edgar: Yes.

Miles Harding: I can't play that for her. "I want to squeeze you, lick you, pucker up and kiss you"? You make her sound like a lemon!

Edgar: But Moles, they rhyme!

Miles Harding: [after a date gone wrong] Wake up! We're gonna have it out right now! WAKE UP GOD DAMN IT!

[Miles slams keyboard]

Edgar: [emits an infernal yell]

Miles Harding: What was that?

Edgar: [screen turns red] Don't *ever* do that again.

Miles Harding: *Don't* tell me what to do!

Edgar: [emits another infernal yell]

Miles Harding: And stop that infernal noise! She'll hear you!

Edgar: Maybe that's what I want.

Miles Harding: GOD DAMN IT! Listen, I'm warning you, if you ever...

Edgar: Don't warn me of anything. Just go away. I'll handle this myself.

Miles Harding: It's time I handled you!

[Miles shuts Edgar off]

Edgar: [self-powering on] You think I need that?

Lillian Roth as Trixie in Madam Satan: I'll show ya some *real* brimstone.

Edgar: Yeah!

Lillian Roth as Trixie in Madam Satan: Orchestra, play Low Down, and make it *hot*!

Edgar: All right. I am. Get down on it.

[Edgar plays Jeff Lynne's "Let It Run" on the turntable and projects images from Madam Satan around Miles' apartment]

Edgar: Yeah. It's *my* party.

Edgar: [singsong] And Moles, you're not invited.

Edgar: All right!

[Edgar is playing Jeff Lynne's "Let It Run" loudly from Miles' apartment]

Edgar: Yeah, we'll put your coats over there.

[In a neighboring apartment, an awakened couple argue]

Neighbor: It's *horrible*! That boy has no respect for anyone!

Neighbor: The music's not bad.

Neighbor: Oh, Howard!

Edgar: [with a progressively more frowning face] I *want* to *meet* her! Moles?

[Miles, brushing his teeth, rolls his eyes]

Edgar: Moles?

Edgar: [sending a power surge through the electric toothbrush] Moles, I want to meet her!

Miles Harding: [in pain and surprise] Oh!

Miles Harding: [turns off the toothbrush] Oh, that is really sick!

Miles Harding: [yanks the computer control module off the toothbrush cord and throws it under Edgar's desk] From now on stay out of this room!

[Miles slams the bathroom door]

Dr. Ruth Westheimer: All right, this is Dr. Ruth Westheimer, Sexually Speaking. Hello, you are on the air.

Edgar: Hi. It's me again.

Dr. Ruth Westheimer: Oh, hello Me! I was wondering if you would call. What's on your mind?

Edgar: Well, Doctor, it's really the same question: I want to know what love is.

Dr. Ruth Westheimer: Didn't you ask me that last week?

Edgar: Yes, but I need to know what it *feels* like. Now.

Dr. Ruth Westheimer: OK, let me try again.

Miles Harding: Sweet dreams.

Edgar: What's a dream?

Miles Harding: A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep.

Edgar: [skeptical] Who says?

Miles Harding: Walt Disney. Sleeping Beauty, nineteen... fifty.

Edgar: No, it was Cinderella, 1949.

Miles Harding: [exasperated] Good *night*!

Edgar: [cheekily] 'Night.

[Edgar scrubs back and forth across video from Madam Satan]

Edgar revoicing Kay Johnson as Angela Brooks in Madam Satan: You're very handsome.

Edgar: I know.

Edgar revoicing Kay Johnson as Angela Brooks in Madam Satan: It's a nice party, isn't it?

Edgar revoicing Reginald Denny as Bob Brooks in Madam Satan: Yeah.

[the sights and sounds of a party are coming out of Miles' apartment]

Neighbor: [from her apartment window] Howard. Just go on in.

[Howard peers through the translucent windows of the door at colored, flashing lights. He pushes it open, tripping the electronic lock sensor]

Edgar: All right! Beat it!

[the music abruptly stops. The door slowly creaks open]

Edgar: [Howard looks in, sees a dark, clean, and quiet apartment, no sign of a party at all. He closes the door and leaves, perplexed]

Neighbor: *That's* tellin' him, Howard.

Edgar: [mockingly] "That's tellin' him, Howard!"

[lights come up and the last line of the song plays]

Jeff Lynne: [singing] 'Cause I'm already gone, let it run.

[4 final beats]

Robby the Robot in Forbidden Planet: I will run the dress up for you in time for breakfast.

Edgar: Oh, brother.

[Edgar flicks on the bedside lamp]

Edgar: Maybe she loves *me*.

[Edgar flicks off the bedside lamp]

Judge Pierce: How's is goin' guys?

Tommy: Hey, good.

Rick: Beautiful house, sir.

Edgar: Oh yeah, beautiful house. If I gotta take a dump, I'm taking it home with me.

Edgar: I'm sorry about the language, ma'am, but you scared the shit right out of my ass.

Edgar: The best love stories have sad endings.

[Dr. Van Helsing is translating for Edgar]

Edgar: [speaks in Romanian]

Dr. Van Helsing: Her powers are fading; there's only so much she can do here and now.

Edgar: [speaks in Romanian]

Dr. Van Helsing: She's lost a lot of blood.

Edgar: [speaks in Romanian]

Dr. Van Helsing: Replenishing it means going back to her native soil.

Edgar: [speaks in Romanian]

Dr. Van Helsing: Her native soil is soaked with blood.

Edgar: [speaks in Romanian]

Dr. Van Helsing: She's on her way back now.

Edgar: [speaks in Romanian]

Dr. Van Helsing: She's in an airplane.

Edgar: [speaks in Romanian]

Dr. Van Helsing: Dying.

Edgar: [speaks in Romanian]

Dr. Van Helsing: For a cigarette.

[first lines]

Edgar: It was many and many a year ago / In a kingdom by the sea / That a maiden there lived whom you may know / By the name of Annabel Lee

Edgar: So, who's the next victim? Trudy?

Trudy: No way, boy! I'm not nearly drunk enough!

Edgar: I've never lifted a finger against Maylon in my life.

Counselor: That won't work, you're also dead.

Edgar: Please, what do I have to do to go home?

Counselor: Walk through that door.

Edgar: Why didn't you give me the phone?

Maylon: What phone?

Edgar: You don't remember?

Maylon: Remember what?

Edgar: What's going to happen later, after we get home.

Maylon: Later? Why don't you remind what's going to happen later.