Drunk Quotes in Highlander II: The Quickening (1991)

Drunk: Are you MacLeod?

Conner MacLeod: Yes, I am.

Drunk: Great. I always wanted to meet the guy that turned the world to shit.

Drunk: What do you have to do to get a drink around here?

Drunk: Spiro C. Agnew...

[drink]

Drunk: ... Bobby Riggs...

[drink]

Drunk: ... Peter Fonda...

[drink]

Drunk: ...

Drunk: If I wanted a heart attack, I would've had one myself!

Drunk: [warning Tyler about wolves] They'll come after you, son. Just for the ugly fun of tearing you apart.

Drunk: Eternally grateful... A TOAST!

Max Bialystock: A TOAST!

Leo Bloom: A TOAST... to what?

Drunk: To... to toast, I love toast.

Max Bialystock: To toast.

Leo Bloom: To toast.

Max Bialystock: Here's to failure

Leo Bloom: ...To failure

Drunk: Why, thank you! You're very kind!

[Some patrons are harassing a waitress]

Billy: You guys need to pay up and get out of here.

Drunk: Who the hell are you?

[Billy grabs the drunk by the hair and slams his face on the table]

Billy: I'm an escaped mental patient with a history of violence.

Drunk: Do I need to ring a bell to get a refill? You can see my glass is empty.

Bobby Cupid: Hey, man, the glass is always empty. So is the spot on the counter where the money's supposed to be.

Drunk: Hello, strangers. What are you doin' in the village?

Stanley: Why, we're a coupla gypsies and we're tryin' to make an honest living.

Drunk: Oh, gypsies, eh? Can you tell fortunes?

Stanley: [pointing to Ollie] He can't, but I can.

Drunk: Good! Say, there's a coupla things that I'd like to know. And if you can tell me, I'll pay you well.

Stanley: All right! Your eyes are the windows of your soul. And to know all, I must touch your eyes. Watch closely. Close your eyes, slowly - slowly - slowly - slowly. Shut.

Drunk: Well, what do you see?

Stanley: [while picking his pocket] I see a long woman and a dark journey. That's all I see.

Drunk: Ahhh! Trifle! A long woman in a dark journey. Say, I wouldn't give you one ducat for a fortune like that. Ha! What you mean is a long woman with a tall journey.

Maxwell Slide: Is your name Buster Daniels?

Drunk: Well, it was before I married.

Doug: Well, actually, it's kinda interesting.

Woman in Bar: I'll bet.

Drunk: Tell him.

Woman in Bar #2: We're waiting.

Doug: I- I b- I been doin' a little- I been doin' a little figure skating.

Drunk: Damn.

Man in Bar: What'd he say?

Walter Dorsey: You been doin' what?

Old man in back of bar: Finger painting?

Drunk: [laughs] Things happen here about, they don't tell about. I see things. You see, they say that it's just an old man talking. You laugh at an old man, it's them that laughs and knows better.

[laughs again]

Drunk: [after almost being killed by Jacques' flamethrower] Ya got a light?

[Drunk walks into Sun Ra's employment agency]

Drunk: My man, what's happenin?

Sun Ra: Everything is happenin.

Drunk: What is this... I mean what... where am I? Who is you?

Sun Ra: I am everything, and nuthin.

Drunk: Nuthin? Well you betta tell me about this nuthin stuff, cause, uh, I need a job. I... I don't know what to do.

Sun Ra: What have you been doin lately?

Drunk: Uh huh uh, nuthin, really, nuthin.

Sun Ra: How long have you been doing nuthin?

Drunk: Quite some time. Quite some time.

Sun Ra: You must be an expert at it.

Drunk: Got my B.A., ya see.

Sun Ra: We'll hire you to do that.

Drunk: How much I get paid, man?

Sun Ra: Nuthin.

Drunk: Nuthin? NUTHIN? I got to have sumthin so I can get me anotha botty. I can't go for that shit!

Drunk: Hey! I didn't know I was livin' next door to a den of criminals. She was mighty cute, though. I tried to get better acquainted.

Michael Shayne: Yeah? You're lucky you didn't make the grade. You might have wound up in the morgue.

Drunk: Hey, you, come here. Give me another drink before the fight starts.

Bartender: Say, wait a minute. When is this fight gonna start?

Drunk: When you find out I can't pay for the drinks!