Drew Decker Quotes in Scary Movie (2000)

The Killer: What's your favorite scary movie?

Drew Decker: Kazaam! You know, the one where Shaq plays a genie.

The Killer: That's not a horror movie.

Drew Decker: Yeah, well, you've never seen Shaq act.

The Killer: [reading pornography magazine] Nice breasts...

Drew Decker: What do you want?

The Killer: I wanna see what your insides look like.

Drew Decker: Then turn to page 54.

The Killer: [on the phone] What's was that noise?

Drew Decker: Oops, I farted. I didn't think you'd hear me.

The Killer: No... that popping noise...

Drew Decker: [on the phone with killer] Or else my boyfriend is gonna be here any minute. He's black and he'll kick your ass!

The Killer: You mean the one who wears makeup and dresses like a woman?

Drew Decker: How did you know?

The Killer: Turn the porch lights on.

Drew Decker: [Turns on the lights, to see a Prince look-alike tied up, screaming] That's not my boyfriend. I mean, I fucked him a couple of times, but that's it.

Drew Decker: [the man shrieks] Look, I'm calling the cops!

The Killer: Go ahead, call the cops. But you might wanna check the back door first. You forgot to lock it.