Dorothy Parker Quotes in Mrs. Parker and the Vicious Circle (1994)

Dorothy Parker: I'll wear my heart on my sleeve like a wet, red stain.

Dorothy Parker: Razors pain you, rivers are damp, acids stain you, drugs cause cramp. Guns aren't lawful, nooses give, gas smells awful; you might as well live.

[after being chewed out for missing a magazine deadline]

Dorothy Parker: Someone else was using the pencil.

Dorothy Parker: But I can't understand what God is saying, because he's got a mask over his face. Isn't that just like Him?

Dorothy Parker: The sun's gone dim, the moon's turned black; for I loved him and he didn't love back.

Dorothy Parker: I'd kiss you, but I'm not sure it'd come out right.

Dorothy Parker: I never liked a man I didn't meet.

Dorothy Parker: Time doth flit; oh shit.

Dorothy Parker: You don't want to turn into the town drunk, Eddie. Not in Manhattan.

Dorothy Parker: I may have him mounted.

Robert Benchley: One would assume.

Dorothy Parker: It's as if I were a spoiled virgin, and no one will have me!

Robert Benchley: You're not spoiled. Just highly seasoned.

Dorothy Parker: Tragedies don't kill us, Woodrow. Messes kill us.

Dorothy Parker: I write doodads because it's a doodad kind of town.