Donald Quotes in Interstellar (2014)

Donald: Popcorn at a ball game is unnatural. I want a hot dog.

Donald: In my day we had real ball players. Who are these bums?

Donald: When I was a kid, it seemed like they made something new every day. Some, gadget or idea, like every day was Christmas. But six billion people, just imagine that. And every last one of them trying to have it all. This world isn't so bad. You're the one who doesn't belong. Born forty years too late, or forty years too early... My daughter knew it, God bless her. And your kids know it. Especially Murph.

Lilly: I set fires to feel joy.

Donald: That's adorable.

Donald: Whenever you're ready, dude.

Cynthia Rose: [Scoffs and takes off her hat, revealing her pink hair] Yeah, hi. My name is Cynthia Rose.

Donald: Huh. Not a dude. It's not a dude.

Bumper: Well, well, well, look who's in Treble!

Donald: Ah, classic pun.

Bumper: I know.

Bumper: Oh yeah, ladies. Gather around. Ready for a show.

Donald: Come on, baby bubble, wait in line.

Bumper: Yeah.

Donald: Yep.

Bumper: You want some of this.

Donald: I know you do.

Bumper: Nice!

Donald: Bumper and Donald.

Bumper: Mmm-hmm.

Donald: Gettin' it... gettin' it.

Donald: Who do you think would be easier to sleep with, Captain America or a great white shark?

Bumper: A great white shark.

Donald: [intentionally antagonizing Happy] You're gonna need a blanket and suntan lotion, cause you're never gonna get off that beach, just like the way you never got into the NHL... you jackass!

Donald: [intentionally antagonizing Happy] Hey Gilmore, you suck ya jackass.

Happy Gilmore: Why don't you shut the hell up.

Donald: [intentionally antagonizing Happy] You will not make this putt... you jackass!

Donald: [to Shooter on the phone] Shooter! Great to hear from you! You wanna go to the Sizzler and get some grub?

Virginia: [Happy has just been hit by a car] Happy! Happy are you okay?

Happy Gilmore: [groaning] Volkswagen!

Donald: [out of the window, driving the car] Jackass!

Donald: Good shooting soldier!

Donald: I just want you to know, my safe word is "pineapple".

Donald: Need I remind you we have somebody OD-ing back here?

Paul Denton: He's not OD-ing. He's a freshman. Freshmen don't OD.

Donald: I feel like we're pretty well-liked. Look, I can be socially awkward. You know, but that's more just being quiet, I'm not a jerk.

Leanne: I feel like maybe people don't like Don, but they don't say it.

Leanne: The only way to make it in this business, honey, is to be a triple threat. Look at Miley.

Patty: Great role model, mom.

Donald: Yeah, she's a triple threat. She can sing, dance and take off all her clothes!

Leanne: Well, she's got a great body. She works very hard for that. Why not show it off?

Leanne: What kind of pictures do you think we should put out of Patty? Like a pageanty one, or could I put out several? We paid lots of money for the best photographers, we have great pictures of her.

Donald: We go to Walmart and really get it done.

Donald: I ain't done nothin', but I'm sure tired.

Rheba: Yeah you always tired, for once, you was born tired. Here, take this. You just in time enough to set the table.

Donald: I don't see why I gotta do your work just because we engaged.

Donald: There's only one thing worryin' me - has they got Relief up there?

Rheba: Sure they is. They got Relief everywhere, now.

Donald: They do? Well, let's get on up there, then.

Penny Sycamore: Donald, were you ever in a monastery?

Donald: No, I don't go no place much. I'm on relief.

Donald: Forgot the mustard!

Donald: [Walking into a crowded jail cell] Home again!

Boris Kolenkhov: A lot like Siberia, only it stinks!

DePinna: It was fun being fingerprinted, wasn't it?

Ed Carmichael: Mr. Kirby didn't think so. It took three men to hold him down.

Grandpa Martin Vanderhoff: Never a dull moment, that's what I say. Never a dull moment.

Donald: [Maurice and Ian are hitting at each other during a fight] What is this, catheters at dawn?

Donald: What is this, catheters at dawn?

[last lines]

Donald: Get out. Go on back home.

[Donald and Jack in a shoot-out to the death]

Donald: Jaaaack?

Jack: Yeah?

Donald: Time out, OK?

Jack: Time out?

Donald: Time out.

Jack: What do you mean, 'time out?'

Donald: You're not gonna believe this. I was in a hurry when I left the cabin this morning, and, well, silly me, I got the wrong bullets.

Donald: Well, I was nervous.

Jack: What about me?

Donald: Oh, come off it, man. You're so cool, you piss ice cubes.

Jack: It's a hereditary thing in my family, y'know. Uhh, nerves, colitis, y'know.

Donald: Colitis? Y'know, that must be horrible being a professional killer with colitis.

Jack: Yeah, that's what...

Donald: They hear you coming, don't they?

Donald: You shot my gun god damn it! You're not supposed to shoot a person's gun! Oh, now that pisses me off! You know how much one of these cost?

Donald: [dressed in a face-obscuring, hooded, fur-lined parka] I feel like a gynecologist for a grizzly bear.

Doreen: I never thought I'd be contemplating marriage to a man who owned an automatic assault rifle.

Donald: It's not automatic, hon. It's semiautomatic. Automatic weapons are illegal. And why are you using the word "contemplating?"

Doreen: I just mean, Donald, you seem so different.

Donald: Hey, Frizzer, I'm no different, I'm just armed.

Sonny Paluso: You're not going to die.

Donald: They always say that to people who are going to die.

Donald: I'm so hungry I could eat a whore.

May: Some men, you should know, still find me attractive.

[starts rubbing herself]

Donald: How would I know them? I didn't attend the braille institute.

Donald: Well, the only problem is, I can't make love to a woman, unless I eat her

Donald: Here I come.

Susie Grubb: You will soon.

Donald: [rejecting a crab sandwich offered by Donald] Sir, no sir! I remember those films in the army. I don't want anything to do with crabs.

Donald: [Donald comes home drunk and notices neighbor with cat] Oh, what a nice pussy! Pussy, pussy, pussy.

Dee Dee Dee: What's your name, sweetie?

Donald: Donald. What's yours?

Dee Dee Dee: Dee Dee Dee. My mother wanted to name me Delia, but she stuttered.

Donald: Oh...

Dee Dee Dee: Hey, have you ever screwed in 3-Dee?

May: Donald, there is something bothering you, isn't there?

Donald: You know May, you have a definite grab for the obvious.

Donald: Yeah, not bad!

May: Now, where were we? Who knows, the mood might give you ideas!

Donald: I've got an idea all right. But I think it's against the law...

La Greasy Delight: May I have your order, please?

Roosevelt: Go ahead, Dad!

Donald: Er, let down your hair, unbutton your blouse, hike up your skirt, stick out your tongue, and a coke! And a coke!

Donald: Life sucks - in a good way. Falling in love, falling in hate, getting laid, getting hurt - what's one without the other? When it comes to the ritual of growing up, sometimes you smile because you're happy. Other times, you smile just because you've survived. But hey, a smile is a smile.

Talia: Here's where we tell you that this was the summer we lost our innocence.

Donald: But really, it's the summer we got it back.

Jasper: Excuse the cheese, but love matters, respect matters, and causing pain is never cool.

Pixel: Actually causing pain is about the coolest thing you can do, but cool isn't what it used to be.

[first lines]

Donald: Come in. Oh it's you. I'm sorry Arthur, I thought it was the babysitter.

Arthur: Just what do you have against babysitters?

Donald: [Knock at the door] Hey, anybody want to buy a Saturday Evening Post?

Dorothy: No!

Donald: I'm working my way through college. Ha! Oh, you didn't know me. Hello, Phillip. Sylvia. John. And you, young lady.

[Kisses Dorothy]

Dorothy: Ohhh, Brandy before dinner.

Donald: Oh, I only had a couple. I'd a been here earlier, only I...

Dorothy: Only you came later.

Donald: That's right.

Donald: [Scratches his shot at the pool table] Ohhh!

Dorothy: Little drunkie, huh?

Donald: Just a little.

Dorothy: Well, I'm not romantic. Its just not my nature. But, I'm awfully glad for you, Donald. I hope you'll be happy.

Donald: Thanks. You're a peach.

Donald: [to Holiday] I used to think there's something wrong here. Now I know there's something wrong here.

Donald: Thanks to the silver screen your neurosis has got style.

Michael: [singing] Oh, you really gotta figger, it's tough to be a nigger, but it's tougher to be a Jew.

Donald: My God, Michael! You're a charming host!

Harold: Michael doesn't have charm, Donald. He has counter-charm.

Michael: What is he - a psychiatrist or a hairdresser?

Donald: Actually he's both. He shrinks my head and then combs me out.

Michael: Believe it or not, there was a time in my life when I didn't go around announcing I was a faggot.

Donald: Well, that must have been before speech replaced sign language!

Michael: [sings] "Forget your troubles, c'mon get happy! You better chase all your cares away!" What's more boring than a queen doing a Judy Garland imitation?

Donald: A queen doing a Bette Davis imitation.

Donald: [before he attacks Scott] Dad, where the fuck is Lucy!