Dolph Quotes in Hoodwinked! (2005)

[Dolph and Boingo get off the tram at the top terminal]

Dolph: I don't like it. The cops are all over the place.

Boingo: Forget about the cops! We've got everything we need right here!

Dolph: What about the old lady? She's alive. She'll be back.

Boingo: You just don't get it, do you, Dolph? I'm done! I'm done dancing for the man - The Muffin Man! And Granny! They can both take a hike! I'm never gonna answer to anyone ever again!

[Boingo bursts out wailing, then cackles, then cries, all in a matter of seconds, then immediately sobers up]

Boingo: Oh! I just love my job!

[He and Dolph start walking down the loading ramp]

Boingo: You see how it works, Dolph? You prioritize, you set your goals, you write a mission statement. You ask yourself, "Where do I see me in five years?"

Red Puckett: How about behind bars?

[Boingo turns around and sees Red standing at the bottom of the ramp, glaring at him]

Boingo: [surprised] Red! Oh! Hey, Red! What are you- you've spoiled the surprise!

Red Puckett: You're the bandit!

[beat]

Boingo: Surprise!

Martin: [walks up to bullies, picks up wooden board] I've been taking your crap all my life!

[beats the bullies in one swipe]

Dolph, Jimbo Jones, Kearney: Uggghh!

Martin: Whoo! This feels good! No wonder you do it.

Mary: Ok, then, who's left to report out their root? Andre?

Andre: Shit, Ms. Mary, I ain't the only one who ain't got no root.

Mary: Andre, we don't use profanity or double negatives here at True Directions. Ok, who's next? Megan!

Megan: Well, I've really been thinking but I just can't think of anything.

Graham: I think our little Prom Queen is too afraid to disclose.

Megan: Oh, really? What's your root, Graham?

Graham: We're working on your issue here, not mine. You're deflecting.

Mary: Actually, I think it might be a great idea for Megan to be reminded of your root, Graham.

Graham: My mother got married in pants.

[group applauds]

Mary: All right, let's see, uh, Dolph!

Dolph: Too many locker room showers with the varsity team.

Mary: Hilary?

Hilary: Um, all girl boarding school.

Mary: Sinead.

Sinead: I was born in France.

Mary: Clayton.

Clayton Dunn: My mom let me play in her pumps.

Jan: I like balls.

Mary: Why, thank you for that Jan.

[group applauds]

Mary: Joel?

Joel: Traumatic... bris. So... yeah.

Dolph: I'm doing this for you, not for Clayton!

Megan: Yeah, right.